john-green-david-levithan-will-grayson-will-grayson

i text tiny a minute later.
MADE NEW GAY FRIEND.
and he texts back
then
PROGRESS!!!
YOU SHOULD FORM A GSA!
to which i reply
ONE STEP AT A TIME, BIG BOY
and he replies
BIG BOY - I LUV THAT!
the texting goes on for the rest of the day and into the night. it’s pretty incredible, really, how
frequently you can write someone when you’re keeping the character count low. it’s so stupid,
because it feels like tiny’s sharing the day with me. like he’s there when i’m ignoring maura or talking
to gideon or finding out that nobody’s going to axe-murder me in gym class because i’m sending out a
homosexual vibe.
still, it’s not enough. because i felt that way sometimes with isaac. and i won’t let this relationship
be all in my head.
so that night i call tiny on the phone and talk to him. i tell him i want him to come visit. and he
doesn’t make excuses. he doesn’t say it’s not possible. instead, he says
tiny: how soon
i will admit there’s a certain degree of giving a fuck that goes into not giving a fuck. by saying you
don’t care if the world falls apart, in some small way you’re saying you want it to stay together, on
your terms.
when i hang up with tiny, mom comes into my room.
mom: how’s it going
me: fine.
and it’s true, for once.