Feb. 22 - San Antonio News

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commentary PAGE 2 TALESPINNER February 22, 2013 Signs to look for in teen dating Signs of Healthy Relationships: • Your partner respects you and your individuality • Both of you are open and honest • Your partner supports you and your choices even when they disagree with you • Both of you have equal say and respected boundaries • Your partner understands that you need to study or hang out with friends or family • You can communicate your feelings without being afraid of negative consequences • Both of you feel safe being open and honest • Can disagree or even argue without ever threatening harm Signs of Unhealthy Relationships: • Inconsiderate, disrespectful or distrustful • Doesn’t communicate their feelings • Tries to emotionally or financially control you • Keeps you from getting a job or gets you fired • Humiliates you in front of friends, or online sites such as Facebook • Threatens to “out you” to family • Threatens to commit suicide if they “lose you” Warning Signs of Abuse • Checking your cell phone or email without permission • Constantly putting you down • Extreme jealousy or insecurity • Explosive temper • Isolating you from family or friends • Making false accusations • Mood swings • Physically hurting you in any way • Possessiveness • Telling you what to do Warning Signs of Physical Abuse • Scratching, punching, biting, strangling or kicking • Throwing something at you such as a phone, book, shoe or plate • Pulling your hair • Pushing or pulling you • Grabbing your clothing • Using a gun, knife, box cutter, bat, mace or other weapon • Smacking your bottom • Forcing you to have sex or perform a sexual act • Grabbing your face to make you look at them • Grabbing you to prevent you from leaving or to force you to go somewhere Navigating teen dating violence By Emily Mueller JBSA Family Advocacy Program Domestic violence is an issue that adult victims find difficult to discuss and often keep secret. It should come as no surprise that teen dating violence is even less discussed and underreported by victims who are often navigating difficult teen years and are secretive in nature. Unique challenges for teens who encounter date violence include social pressure to have a boyfriend or girlfriend, lack of experience in healthy dating relationships, fear that peers will lose respect for them or take sides against them, an emotional attachment to or a fear of the abuser, and a limited knowledge of helpful resources. Many teens believe extreme jealousy and controlling behaviors are signs of love and caring. Teens and young adults can benefit from continued education. Just because a dating partner is currently not physically abusive, does not mean a relationship is healthy. Any unhealthy relationship trait can be a risk factor for future physical, sexual or emotional abuse. In addition, acceptance or a lack of awareness of unhealthy dating practices can lead to a cycle of domestic violence in future relationships. For more information on dating violence, contact the JBSA- Lackland or JBSA-Fort Sam Houston Family Advocacy services at 292-5967. At JBSA-Randolph, call 652-2448. More information is available online at http://www. teendvmonth.org/dating-violence-101.org, http:// www.loveisrespect.org and http://www.whitehouse. gov/1is2many, or call the National Dating Abuse Helpline open 24 hours day at 866-331-9474 or 866-331-8453. Bergquist Gate Closure Beginning March 4 Bergquist Gate will close for an extended period of time due to construction. Signal lights will be off and barriers will be in place to prevent traffic from entering through the gate. Camp Bramble access will be maintained. All traffic is directed to Luke Boulevard Gate. Email lauriebeth.smith@us.af.mil with questions. Joint Base San Antonio Lackland Editorial Staff BR I G. GEN. THERESA C. CARTER, JBSA/502N D AIR BA SE WI N G, CO M M A N D E R TO D D G. WH I T E, JBSA/502N D AIR BA SE WI N G PU B L I C AF FA I R S DI R E C TO R OS CA R BA L L A DA R E S, JBSA-LAC K L A N D PU B L I C AF FA I R S CH I E F VACA N T IN T E R N A L CO M M U N I C AT I O N S CH I E F 671-4111 L.A. SH I V E LY, MA N AG I N G ED I TO R MI K E JO S E P H, SE N I O R WR I T E R 671-4357 JO S E T. GA R Z A, III, SP O RT S/STA F F WR I T E R, 671-0478 DO RO T H Y LO N A S, DE S I G N/LAYO U T 671-5049 Office 1701 Kenly Ave. Suite 102 Lackland AFB, Texas 78236-5103 671-4111; (fax) 671-2022 Email: tale.spinner@us.af.mil Commander’s Action Line: actionline@lackland.af.mil. Straight Talk: 671-6397 (NEWS) For advertising information: Prime Time Military Newspapers Ave E at Third Street San Antonio, Texas 78205 250-2024 This newspaper is published by Prime Time Military Newspapers, a private firm in no way connected with the U.S. Air Force, under exclusive written contract with Lackland AFB, Texas. This commercial enterprise Air Force newspaper is an authorized publication for members of the U.S. military services. Contents of the Talespinner are not necessarily the official views of, or endorsed by, the U.S. government, the Department of Defense, or the Department of the Air Force. The appearance of advertising in this publication, including inserts or supplements, does not constitute endorsement by the Department of Defense, the Department of the Air Force or Prime Time Military Newspapers, of the products or services advertised. Everything advertised in this publication shall be made available for purchase, use or patronage without regard to race, color, religion, sex, national origin, age, marital status, physical handicap, political affiliation, or any other non-merit factor of the purchaser, user or patron. Editorial content is edited, prepared and provided by the Public Affairs Office of the 502nd Air Base Wing. All photos, unless otherwise indicated, are U.S. Air Force photos. Deadline for submissions is noon Thursday the week prior to publication.
news February 22, 2013 TALESPINNER PAGE 3 Ne w s in Brief Feb. 22 diamonds & denim auction Reservation deadline to attend the charity auction sponsored by the Wilford Hall Auxiliary at the Joint Base San Antonio-Fort Sam Houston golf club. The benefit is open to civilians, and cost is $25 per person. For reservations or information, contact Pam Bobb at 900- 2942, email resvpwha@gmail.com or visit http://wilfordhallauxiliary.com. The March 2 event, from 6-10 p.m., supports wounded warriors and deployed military members’ families. Feb. 28 firearms registration deadline Failure to comply with the Joint Base San Antonio policy by the deadline will result in violators being prosecuted by security forces. The JBSA Integrated Defense Plan mandates all personnel who live in base housing, a dormitory or stay in base lodging, to register privatelyowned firearms at Pass and Registration. Additional requirements apply for those personnel utilizing JBSA recreational vehicle campgrounds. Newly-arrived personnel who live or stay in base government-owned facilities or privatized housing must register their firearms within three duty days of arrival. Firearms are registered on Air Force Form 1314, Firearms Registration. The form must be signed by the personnel’s unit commander. The commander must also verify a properly completed Department of Defense Form 2760, Qualification to Possess Firearms or Ammunition. The forms are available at http://www.epublishing.af.mil. For more information or questions, contact security forces on JBSA-Lackland at 671-9162, JBSA-Fort Sam Houston and JBSA-Camp Bullis at 221-0213 or JBSA- Randolph at 652-4365. March 8 jbsa 2013 annual awards ceremony Tickets are on sale for the event, to be held at the Marriott Rivercenter Hotel in downtown San Antonio. The guest speaker will be San Antonio Mayor Julian Castro. Social hour begins at 5:30 p.m., dinner starts at 6:30 p.m. For additional information or tickets, contact Master Sgt. Carteralynn Ford at 671-3663 or Master Sgt. Marygail Harmon at 671-8130. Collaborative law: A team approach By E. Stephanie Hebert Legal Assistance Attorney, 802nd MSG/JA Texas encourages the peaceful resolution of disputes through alternative dispute resolution, or ADR, with special consideration given to parent-child relationships. ADR allows people to arbitrate, mediate and collaborate in an informal setting away from the courthouse. While arbitration and mediation have long been favored forms of ADR in Texas, collaborative law is gaining new ground in the U.S. and Texas. Texas was the first state to enact collaborative law statutes in 2001, and it was the third state to adopt the Uniform Collaborative Family Law Act, or UCFLA, 10 years later in 2011. The UCFLA is now codified in Chapter 15 of the Texas Family Code. Collaboration is similar to mediation in that the parties participate in the negotiation process and have control over the outcome of their settlement. If the parties have not attempted mediation prior to trial, it will usually be accomplished through a court order just before trial – after the parties have spent months fighting over their separate objectives. Collaborative law, by comparison, is completely voluntary and requires that the parties and their attorneys agree, from the very beginning of the case, that they will negotiate by employing team-building techniques instead of waiting until the case is almost over – when irreparable damage has already been done, when there’s more pressure on everyone involved and emotions are at their highest. So how does the process work? Both parties, along with their lawyers, must sign a “participation agreement” and notify the court of their course of action. The parties, with their lawyers, identify joint objectives and agree upon the exchange of discovery (disclosing information essential for the case) and using experts and other professionals who will serve in a neutral capacity. Everyone involved in the process continues to work together until a settlement is reached. There are a couple of exceptions, but as long as the parties and their lawyers are working as a team, court appearances, high legal fees, discovery disputes and litigation deadlines can be reduced or altogether alleviated. Any final agreement reached by the parties will be memorialized in writing by the attorneys and presented to the court for signature. The collaborative law process can be terminated by either party at any time, with or without cause. However, once the process is terminated, both attorneys are disqualified from representing the clients any further. The parties will thus be forced to hire new lawyers, attempt settlement through another form of ADR or go to trial. Perhaps the largest obstacle to collaborative law is the requirement that each party be represented by an attorney. That means that pro se litigants are ineligible to participate in this statutory process. Remember, however, that there is nothing stopping individuals from resolving their parentchild dispute through a mediator or on their own. For more information, visit http://www.collablawtexas. com/the-collaborative-law-approach and watch two videos of couples speaking candidly about participating in the collaborative law process. The website also offers a comparison model of all ADR alternatives. Call 671-3362 to schedule an appointment with a Joint Base San Antonio-Lackland legal assistance attorney for answers to questions about collaborative law, or other ADR alternatives.
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Feb. 22 - San Antonio News

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