Anthony Ainley arrested in bar brawl - The Vervoid

My Favourite Who:
Disc Jockeys
This month, some of the cream of the
BBC's disc jockeys have kindly given
up some of their valuable spare time
to talk to us. Here, Alan "Fluff"
Freeman, Simon Bates, Nicholas
Andrew Argylle Campbell and Bruno
Brooks select their favourite episodes
of Doctor Who.
1. THE WAR MACHINES (1966)
ALAN FREEMAN:
"Hey, there time travellers. This story was a
treat, particularly when it compared Bill
Hartnell to my old mate Jimmy Saville. Lovely
people, yeah. Good to see the Doc being
called by his full name for once, and that
WOTAN was terrifying. Never let anybody put
you down, and I'll see you down the Inferno for
a real rave up - not 'arf!"
2. DOCTOR WHO (1996)
SIMON BATES:
"Great fun, this one. The Doctor and Grace,
well...phew! They knew it was wrong, but they
kissed. They enjoyed it, so they did it again.
And again. And as these things often happen,
they ended up in bed, and Grace gave birth to
a little baby Time Lord while Eric Roberts had a
bad night downstairs. Gruesome effects,
listeners, and I was bloody terrified. I'm not
feeling very well, so can you tell the smudger
to piss off?" ( According to his
agent, Mr. Bates has been "overworking",
which perhaps explains his strangeness here -
Ed)
3. THE TIME WARRIOR (1974)
NICKY CAMPBELL:
"This was a really kosher story, if I may use
that expression. In fact, it was effing great.
That of course, was the F-word, and I'm not
talking about federalism. Gimme the love,
Gimme the TARDIS. I wrote a song based on
the Doctor Who theme tune, but I lost my
rhyming dictionary so it was a waste of time,
really."
4. NIGHTMARE OF EDEN (1979)
BRUNO BROOKES:
"Now we all like to have fun, don't we?
Everyone loves to party, but hey - you don't
need vraxoin to have a good time. It really
screws you up. Say no to vraxoin, no matter
who says that it's cool - Believe me, it isn't.
Thanks for listening."
David Hasselhoff to
star in new Who film
After years of speculation, the
Newsletter can exclusively reveal that
Doctor Who is to be made into a
Hollywood blockbuster - with David
Hasselhoff in the title role.
Rumours have been circulating for
several years that Hasselhoff, 48, star
of Knight Rider and Baywatch, would
be the latest incarnation of the
Doctor, and now they finally seem to
have come true. A news release from
Paramount Pictures says that Doctor
Who - Last of the Time Lords is to be
directed by Robert Zemeckis, who is
very familiar with the concept of time
travel following his successful Back
To The Future trilogy. Hasselhoff will
star as Doctor Who, while Sharon
Stone, Nicola Bryant and Su Pollard
will feature as the Doctor's glamorous
assistants. Hasselhoff told the
Newsletter: "I'm really glad it's finally
gonna happen. I've been waiting
years for this role, and at last it has
dropped into my lap."
However, some Who fans are less
than enthusiastic about the news. "It's
a bloody disgrace" said TV critic and
Who aficionado Sam Brady. "We all
thought that Universal's Paul McGann
disaster was crap, and now look! A
bloody Yank playing the Doctor.
Hasselhoff couldn't act his way out of
a paper bag, and I'm sure they'll be a
parade of leggy lovelies just like in
Baywatch. A far better choice to play
Doctor Who is Morrissey, who
represents the essential Englishness
of the character."
Other fans, such as Griff Rhys Jones,
are worried about continuity.
"Will it feature a regeneration
sequence with Paul McGann?" he
asks. "And will we finally see the
rapping TARDIS console with lips?"
Last Of The Time Lords goes into
production in October, with a release
date provisionally planned for June
1998. The villains of the piece have
yet to be confirmed, but Eric Roberts
has been approached to reprise the
role of the Master, while John Scott
Martin and Cy Town have been
brought in as "Dalek consultants".
2
Your Letters
THE NEWSLETTER,
23 CHANEY SQUARE, LONDON W127RJ.
Dear Sir,
I have just finished reading The Eight Doctors
by Terrance Dicks, and I have to say I am
appalled. The book seemed to have been
written by a blind, five year old horse. There
was no characterisation, continuity cock-ups
and a really awful companion called Sam
Jones. I thought it would be a hunky man
based on Sam Jones who starred in the classic
Flash Gordon film, but instead I found it was a
voluptuous teenage girl. Please pass on my
discontent to Mr. Dicks and BBC WorldWide
Publishing.
Yours faithlessly, Barry Letts, Mecca.
PS - Listen out on Radio Two for my
forthcoming Blake's Seven series - It's great!
Sorry, Barry. After your dismal failure "The
Ghosts Of N-Space" (in which Jon
Pertwee's lisp overshadowed some ghastly
continuity cock-ups such as the Brigadier
being half Italian!?!) we refuse to take any
of your radio series seriously. Stick to
meditation, mate.
The Doctor's Choice!
In this issue, we are fortunate to have
the views of Doctor Number Five,
Peter Davison .....
Doctor Favourite memory
Bill Hartnell The Tenth Planet
Pat Troughton The Five Doctors
Jon Pertwee The Time Monster
Tom Baker Underworld
Peter Davison Castrovalva
Colin Baker Dimensions In Time
Sylv McCoy Doctor Who - the film
Paul McGann n/a
Peter Cushing n/a
Some classic moments selected this week by
Peter Davison: "Well, Bill used to get a
little...tetchy, but he was great with the
Cybermen, wasn't he. Pat was a laugh in The
Five Doctors, he used to keep me in stitches.
And why not? After all, that is how it all started.
Now Jon was so commanding in The Time
Monster, while I loved Tom in Underworld.
Why? I don't know. I have to explain? Oh, must
I? Ah, well. It was his commanding presence. It
is such a shame to hear him talk about
shagged out old Doctor Whos, isn't it? To him,
WE'RE the strangers! My own favourite is my
first story, Castrovalva, which is rather
splendid, while it was good to meet Colin Baker
on the EastEnders set for Dimensions.
Marvellous man, very witty. Sylvester was so
beautiful in the Paul McGann film, I wish he'd
stayed on. Splendid fellows - all of them!"
THE NEWSLETTER IS PRINTED MONTHLY BY MAGNUS
AND LUXOR PUBLISHING, COPYRIGHT (C) 1997.