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CRUISE RELATIONSHIPSHow to Make it as aCruising CoupleBy Barbara PierceBruce and Barbara Pierce.Hanging my head over the side, I threw up again andagain. What am I doing out here in the middle of thenight, what seems like thousands of miles away fromother human beings, throwing up non-stop, frozen to thecore and totally miserable?We were off the coast of Baja, Mexico, traveling southfrom Southern California in our 41-foot ketch Crossroads.Everything was going wrong – we broke the boom, theautopilot stopped working, and we wrapped a line aroundthe prop. It was a nightmare.This is what we’ve been looking forward to and planningfor all these years? Cruising is supposed to be sailingto exotic places in warm climates, meeting new people, havingnew adventures. Why is it so awful?We’d sold our house, our furniture, even our cars.Going back wasn’t an option. I gave up all these thingsbecause I loved Bruce and wanted to go cruising with him.But I didn’t expect this.Once we reached Mexico, and I was on land, wearingshorts, things got better. Soon we’ll be celebrating our 12thanniversary of being together and being on Crossroads.But even when we reached Mexico, and life shouldhave been everything we wanted, being together 24 hours aday was very stressful. It was a whole new way of living.Most couples don’t make it as a cruising couple. Theydon’t make it past the trip where things go wrong, wherethey get seasick, when they get scared. Or they don’t makeit living the cruising lifestyle, together all the time in newplaces. The relationship that worked on land doesn’t workon a boat when everything is changed. Either they moveback on land to save their relationship, or they split up.We spoke with other cruising couples, who have stayedtogether and continued cruising, for their opinions.“Make it Nice!”Don and Lenna Hossack have been cruising on theirIslander Windward Luv for 11 years. They’ve been marriedfor 40 years. “If I want to keep going, I have to make it nicefor her,” Don says.Lucky for me, Bruce also believes that. I have readinglights and fans, a large mirror, a refrigerator, a workspace.Not only do these things make me happy, he says, he benefitsfrom them, too.Years after she left her husband on their boat inMazatlan, one of our friends is still angry that he wouldn’t42 January 2006 SOUTHWINDS www.southwindsmagazine.com