Download PDF - 50/Fifty Magazine

eenidiotic around girls and, in order to try tomake them notice us (or help us forget themafter they rejected us), buy more drinks?Maybe it is some idiotic plan to make fun ofus while our girlfriends give us a hard timebecause our mischievous eyes can´t helplooking at a pair of legs with a girl attachedto them.Perhaps it is one of those useless collegestudies to prove our IQ gets lowered by atleast twenty points in the vicinity of a hot girlafter long periods of solitude?I have to unmask this web of deceit!I have to tell everyone what I know.That isn´t much, to be honest. But, as youcould see, I have lots of theories!In order to save money on clothes, keep ourgirlfriends from dumping us, avoid going tohell on earth (the gym, of course) and, aboveall, to enjoy a nice view the whole year round,we have to find out what´s going on!The best thing to do would beto interrogate one of those girlsAsk them where they come from, what istheir purpose and where do they find suchshort dresses. But I face a terrible obstacle. Idon´t dare to.You would think I´m obsessed with women,that I have “issues”. Well, that is not true. Mymom says I´m a perfectly normal 43 year oldman, that I´m the most beautiful guy in theworld and that I can stay living with her allthe time I want.It’s this Machiavellianstrategy!Like I said, I still don´t know who or whyare they doing this (The North Koreangovernment, maybe?-, or the CIA, or secret(and for some reason hidden and inactive for30 years) parts of the KGB), although I havea few ideas:It could be a strategy intended to proveglobal warming. They know that our bodytemperature goes through the roof whenwe see girls. In this way, conservationistenthusiasts can show the world the earth isgetting warmer and warmer and keep bigcompanies from polluting it.Or maybe it is a plan elaborated by cosmeticsgroups and clothing stores to make regulargirls spend lots of money to look good andthat way give a boost to the economy.Speaking of looking good, another meanorganization that can make both genders actlike slaves to their looks are gym franchises.Regular girls will try hard to look like thosegoddesses that came out of nowhere and wemen will try to look good for them. We all willsweat like mad.What about a strategy designed by themanufacturers of booze to make us (more)