Read a script sample/see cast list - Spiderweb Musicals

1CastThere are 41 speaking parts in this production, some with very few lines, some withlots. It could easily be done with fewer children by doubling up some of the smallparts. If you have a larger cast, there is plenty of room for extras amongst theChildren and the Mice.Mr GruberThe VicarAnnaInspector GrimMr SlyMama MousePapa MouseLittle Mouse 1Little Mouse 2Baby MouseGladysBettyBerthaFredJimPolicemanMiceChildrenKids 1-14An important acting roleLots of lines. A lady vicar is fine! If you have a good actor whocan also play the guitar, s/he would be perfect.Needs to be a good singer: has Silent Night soloMust be strong, confident actors and singers: both havesolo singing in Celebrating Christmas is Serious. Boys or girlsThe Mouse family are really important. Lots of solosinging in the Mouse songs. Don’t just usesmall/young cast members - these are challengingroles!The talkative Cleaning Ladies. Good parts withno solo singing.The Repair men. Brief, comic rolesOne short appearanceAs many as you like. Bear in mind that the Mice get some reallygood songs and action, so - once again - be sure to cast confident,older kids in this chorus group.As many as you like. This is Mr Gruber’s church choir, astraightforward chorus group. Ideal for younger cast members.Policeman/ repair men can also be Children.Short speaking parts amongst the ChildrenThese Nativity characters should be cast amongst the Children, for when theyperform their play-within-a-play:2 Narrators – must be excellent readers 2 ShepherdsMary and Joseph3 Angels2 Innkeepers 3 Kings (No lines)

2Extract from Scene 1Vicar:All:Vicar:(Entering) Bravo! Really, Gruber, they are soundingsplendid.Hello, Vicar!It is wonderful to hear this little church full ofchildren’s voices.(Children all talk at once)Vicar:Gruber:Yes, yes, that’s enough! We may not have much,children, but we do have a proper absent-mindedgenius to write our Christmas songs.(Enthusiastically) And an exceptional church organ.Vicar:Gruber:Vicar:Gruber:Vicar:Gruber:Ah yes. ( The Vicar and children have obviously heardMr Gruber say all this many times before…)It really is an unusually fine instrument for a countrychurch. It has a rich and glorious voice of its own.How nice....and tremendous dynamic range…Lovely.These wonderful pipes and genuine leather bellowsgive it such expressive qualities -(Children are falling asleep)Vicar:All:Inspector:Yes, yes, I know you’re very fond of it. Shall we singanother song now?(Cheer)(From the back) Just one moment!(Pause. Inspector and Sly approach from the back of hall)

3Vicar:Inspector:Gruber:Sly:Inspector:Vicar:Inspector:All:Inspector:Er - who are you?My name is Inspector Grim from OFCHRISP.OFCHRISP?The Office for Standards in Christmas Productions.And this is Mr Sly, my invaluable assistant.Welcome to our humble church, Mr Grim.Humble? It’s a disgrace!(GASP!)I have been observing this shambles of a rehearsal allevening. You’ll never meet your targets like this!(During dialogue, Sly goes about with clipboard peering at objects andpeople, making notes, shaking head etc. At some point he should gothrough the vestry door, emerging with a thoughtful smile)Inspector:I’ll need to see your accounts, of course, and youraction plans. Have you filled in a risk assessment?(Piles paperwork onto Vicar)Vicar: Actually, I’m not sure I -Sly:Children:Sly:Children:Sly:Now then children, do you come to choir every week?Yes, sir.And you’re never late?No, sir.What about him? (Points at Mr Gruber) Is he ever late?(Silence)Sly:Gruber:I see… now, Mr Gruber, when is your Christmasconcert?Some time in December, I think.

4Kid 1:Inspector:Sly:Inspector:Sly:Inspector:It’ll be really good!Then we shall be sure to attend, little girl, to make sureeverything is up to scratch.Inspector Grim!Yes?I have found evidence of MICE in the building!!!WHAT! Intolerable!Song 2: Celebrating Christmas IsSerious(Inspectors/All) CD 2/14There are blackbirds in the chimney,Woodworm in the pewsThe smell in the vestry is very bad news!The boiler needs a service,The roof has sprung a leakAnd shame on the plumbing, it's up the creek!Clean up this unholy mess,We are sadly unimpressed,Strive for perfect cleanliness,Make sure you are neatly dressedChorus:Celebrating Christmas is serious,No-one should be having fun,Too much festive spirit is dangerousMerry Christmas everyone!The windows all need cleaning,There's clouds of filthy dustAnd though there's a hoover, the hoover is bust!There's a cockroach in the kitchen,The belfry's full of bats;and down in the basement, I saw some rats!

5Clean up this unholy mess,We are sadly unimpressed,Strive for perfect cleanliness,Make sure you are neatly dressedChorus: Celebrating Christmas…Here's what we sayThis church won't do at allMore work less playMake up the ground or we'll close you down![Others, spoken] - Close us down??Celebrating Christmas is serious,No-one should be having fun,Too much festive spirit is dangerous,Merry Christmas everyone!Merry Christmas everyone!(Children and Mr Gruber exit at end of song, looking worried)