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we can still find appropriate, creative, and fun things to do together. Worship with others and make lasting church friendships. These friends are our support group. Sabbathkeeping can be done in conjunction with other women who attend alone. An evangelist’s wife told me about a group of women in Russia who worship in the apartment of a single woman each Sabbath and spend the whole day. This weekly spiritual retreat avoids the problems of Sabbathkeeping at home (if it doesn’t leave the husband feeling abandoned). Such a practice may not work everywhere, but it does offer a unique alternative. Never say your spouse is unsaved or believe your marriage is a mistake. 2 What if your spouse believed you were lost? How would that affect your life together? Yet I suspect many wives believe this and even voice it to their unchurched husbands. Imagine, too, how you would feel if your spouse believed your marriage was a mistake. Don’t argue over religion. It never helps, because it doesn’t change minds; instead, it reinforces individual opinions. This is particularly true on the Sabbath, which can easily become a day associated with confrontation. Most religiously divided marriages occur between a believer and an unchurched spouse. It’s unusual but not impossible, however, that two strong believers find themselves in an interfaith marriage. When a woman marries a staunch believer of another faith, it’s important that she respect that faith. If she ever expects her husband to attend church with her, she ought to be willing to attend his church. The couple must make it a point not to argue over differences but emphasize similarities. By praying and studying together, they open their lives to the Holy Spirit. Neither one should insist on a particular interpretation of the Bible unless their partner requests to be part of such a discussion. Remember to listen to each other: we can learn from another’s faith journey. Understand and discuss in a nonthreatening way an unchurched husband’s reasons for discomfort with organized religion or Christianity. Many do not trust religion because of negative experiences. Perhaps they grew up in a rigid home in which religion was more toxic than helpful; or it could have been a home in which religion was either nonexistent or scorned. Many Jewish husbands have been raised with a distrust of Christianity. I know a Jewish man whose grandmother was forced to convert to Catholicism in prewar Europe, which left him with a dislike for structured religions. We can be knowledgeable of, and sympathetic to, a spouse’s experience with religion, and respect his feelings. Consider compromise. Compromise is not always negative and is necessary for peace and respect in homes in which husband and wife have differing beliefs. The Adventist wife must decide what things can and cannot be compromised. We know to avoid tasks identified with the working world for Sabbath to be Sabbath; that generally means not laboring at home or on a job. But there is no overall formula that works for everyone; no one-size-fits-all Sabbathkeeping in these nontraditional homes. The Adventist spouse must prayerfully consider what will work best in her particular situation. Plan ahead. To arrive home after a joyful time in church among friends who love the Lord can be a letdown on Sabbath. When a wife walks through the door, she may be met by a blaring television and a rush to make lunch. It’s as if the Sabbath has come to an end! But it hasn’t. It’s actually just a prayer away. Nothing can crush Sabbath joy more quickly than an unprepared response to the day. Many church families plan Sabbath activities on Friday afternoon. The spouse of the unchurched must plan even more carefully. If there are children, it means guiding them to enjoy Sabbath. It becomes a problem when the spouse differs on what children should do, and the believing wife often has to accept the husband’s decision, because she does not parent alone. Unfortunately, the husband may never feel comfortable with his Adventist wife’s choices for Sabbath, and acceptance of this fact is one of the pains in such a relationship. Worth the Wait As the Amandas of Adventism can tell you, being married to an unchurched husband or someone of a different faith is a lonely road on which one frequently feels isolated. Those who treasure the joy of conversing about faith matters can only imagine what it’s like when such insights are out of bounds. It’s akin to residing in a different dimension from one’s mate; the inability to share spiritual insights and truths is painful—the thing you hold dearest in life cannot be comprehended by the person you love. It’s a situation that causes some to drift away from their church and faith. Yet, there are instances in which this type of marriage works well. It takes two mature and loving adults who are able to work through their differences on life’s most important relationship— their relationship with God. It may take years, but for those who endure, it’s worth the wait. It’s all about acceptance, respect, hope, faith, and love—and the greatest of these is love. n 1 Texts credited to NKJV are from the New King James Version. Copyright © 1979, 1980, 1982 by Thomas Nelson, Inc. Used by permission. All rights reserved. 2 Ellen G. White, The Adventist Home (Nashville: Southern Pub. Assn., 1952), p. 106. Katherine Carey is a pseudonym. 28 (1052) | www.AdventistReview.org | November 21, 2013
The Life of Faith Jews, Christians, and Psalm 110 In biblical interpretation, one can be right for the wrong reasons, and wrong for the right reasons. There’s an important passage in Scripture about which I believe Christians have been right for the wrong reasons, and Jews have been wrong for the right reasons. Psalm 110 is crucial to the Christian faith because its interpretation is traceable to Jesus Himself. In a fascinating exchange with His own Jewish people, Jesus raised the tantalizing possibility that the Jewish Messiah was more than human: “While the Pharisees were gathered together, Jesus asked them, ‘What do you think about the Messiah? Whose son is he?’ “ ‘The son of David,’ they replied. “He said to them, ‘How is it then that David, speaking by the Spirit, calls him “Lord”? For he says, “The Lord said to my Lord: ‘Sit at my right hand until I put your enemies under your feet.’ ” “ ‘If then David calls him “Lord,” how can he be his son?’ “No one could say a word in reply” (Matt. 22:41-46). This exchange, which “delighted” the crowds (see Mark 12:37), has been less than delightful to Jewish theologians through the centuries—in part, because Christians often present it wrongly. In fact, our Bibles have contributed to the problem. Many versions of the Bible translate Psalm 110:1: “The LORD says to my Lord, ‘Sit at My right hand’ ” (NKJV). 1 LORD (all capitals) indicates Yahweh, while Lord (capitalized) indicates Adonai; both are divine. In essence, eager Trinitarian Christians have explained this verse as: God [the Father] says to God [the Son], “Sit at My right hand.” Unfortunately, this has resulted in Christians being dismissed by Jews as naive and careless with Scripture. Why? Because the second “Lord” in verse 1 should not, in fact, be translated adonai (Hebrew for divine Lord) but adoni (Hebrew for human lord). 2 This verse should read: “The LORD says to my lord” (NIV). Our Jewish friends are right. They are also wrong. There’s another “Lord” in this psalm. He can be found in verse 5, sitting at the right hand. He is the Lord, Adonai. But at whose right hand is Adonai sitting? Who else, but Yahweh’s? 3 What? How can a human lord sit at the right hand of Yahweh in verse 1, and a divine Lord sit at the right hand of Yahweh in verse 5? How can one figure be both human and divine at the same time? It’s the Jewish reminder of careful exegesis that, ironically, makes Psalm 110 even more powerful than what many Christians have realized and taught. Indeed, it’s the human nature of “lord” in verse 1 that sets up the cosmic punch line: the divine nature of this same “Lord” in verse 5. The revelation is startling: This Messiah is not only from earth; He’s from heaven. He’s not only the Son of man; He’s the Son of God. He’s not only the offspring of David; He’s the Root of Jesse (Rev. 22:16). This is precisely the point Jesus was making all along. n Andy Nash 1 Texts credited to NKJV are from the New King James Version. Copyright © 1979, 1980, 1982 by Thomas Nelson, Inc. Used by permission. All rights reserved. 2 The Hebrew term adon can mean either a human lord or divine Lord. But when adon appears with the possessive “my” (adoni in Hebrew), it always refers to a human lord or master (even angel), not to God (see, for example, 1 Sam. 29:8; Ex. 21:5; Gen. 18:12; Joshua 5:14). 3 Some have suggested that in verse 5 adonai sits at the right hand of a human lord, meaning that we’ve gone from a human at the right hand of Yahweh in verse 1 to a divine Adonai at the right hand of a human in verse 5. While this is possible, it must be asked: Did these figures somehow switch seats? If so, why? Also, if the “LORD” (Yahweh) of verse 1 is the same figure as the “Lord” (adonai) of verse 5 (who’s described as the “Lord” who will crush kings and judge the nations [verses 5, 6]) would the LORD (Yahweh) also have to drink from a brook along the way (verse 7)? Does it not make more sense that the lord (adoni) invited to sit at the right hand of Yahweh in verse 1 is the same Lord (adonai) seated at the right hand of Yahweh in verse 5? Andy Nash is a professor and lay pastor. He’s leading two tours to Israel next summer. Contact him at andynash5@gmail.com. www.AdventistReview.org | November 21, 2013 | (1053) 29
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