A CALL TO DIE BOOK - Day 26

DAY 26: SEX
DAY 26: SEX
“But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already
committed adultery with her in his heart. If your right eye causes you to
sin, gouge it out and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part
of your body than for your whole body to be thrown into hell.” (Matt
5:28-29)
The guy was obsessed with sex. He lived to get in bed with his girlfriend,
and they hopped in the sack at all hours of the day and night. He told
a friend that his mind didn’t drift toward thoughts of sex; it was riveted
on those thoughts! No matter how much sex he had with her, he
craved more. All day every day, all he could think about and dream
about was sex. But it was never enough.
Then, one day, this young man had his life turned upside down by
Jesus Christ. His powerful urges came under the Lord -N ship of Christ,
and the direction of his life changed dramatically.‘ Does this story
sound familiar? Does it sound like a guy you work with or someone in
your chemistry class? The young man lived in the city of Hippo in the
fourth century. His name was ’ Augustine, and he became one of the
greatest Christian leaders ‘ in the history of the church: Saint Augustine.
Sexual lust can be an addiction, for women as well as men. ‘ We
usually think of addictions being connected with a substance ‘ or
drug. In this case, the drug is adrenalin. The rush of sexual experience,
and even of sexual fantasies, sends a surge of ‘addrenalin through our
bodies, and that feeling is addictive-and destructive.
Lust is the belief that sex with that person will meet your needs and
give you fulfi llment. That is a lie, and if it is not arrested, it quickly leads
to sin. How serious is this sin? Jesus must have thought it was pretty
serious because he told his followers to gouge out the lustful eye and
cut off the lustful hand and throw them away. Was he serious? Was this
a metaphor? He continues, “It is better to lose part of your body than
for your whole body to go into hell.”
When Jesus made dramatic statements like this, it means he wants
us to go to the extreme in our devotion to him. In the area of sex, he
wants us to be pure. Completely pure. Too often, I hear young men
and women say they’ve signed a pledge not to have sex until they
are married, but they watch sexually explicit movies, view porn sites on
the web, and talk about sex with their friends. They think they can go
to third base with their dates, and it’s OK because they didn’t go all
the way. Purity means more than not going all the way until marriage.
A lot more. It means we guard our hearts, we protect our minds, we
put a lock on our tongues. It also means we think of others as people
bought by Jesus Christ, not as objects to please our sinful desires.
Our culture is fl ooded by sexual messages. It’s hard to avoid them. But
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DAY 26: SEX
we need to do just that. Too often, we make excuses like, “Oh, that
doesn’t affect me. I’m used to it.” Paul didn’t brush it off that easily.
Corinth was a city that was much like yours and mine in its obsession
with sex. Paul’s encouragement to the believers in that city was:
“Flee from sexual immorality” (I Cor 6:18). That’s pretty clear. Paul’s
reasoning was that our bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit, so we
should use our bodies (including our brains) only in ways that honor
God.
In that same passage of scripture, Paul reminds us that we “are not
our own” we have been “bought at a price.” When we are tempted
by lustful thoughts, we need to remember that we have been bought
with a price. We can’t just do whatever our hormones suggest. We
have a much higher calling, a much more important role in the
scheme of things, and a Lord who deserves more from us. When we
look at someone and are stimulated by that person’s appearance or
touch, we need to remember: That is a person for whom Christ died.
He wants the best for him (or her), and I do, too.
Some people will say, “Well, as long as I don’t actually have sex with
that person, it doesn’t matter what I think about.” Jesus doesn’t leave
that door open to us. He says that adulterous thoughts are just as sinful
as the act itself. How can that be true? It is true because sin is primarily
of the heart, and lust is
5. Go to war against your sin. If you struggle with lust (and if you’re
normal, you do), don’t make excuses. Do whatever it takes to focus
your attention on Jesus and off sex. In this passage, Jesus says to
pluck out your lustful eye and cut off your lustful hand. What does
this mean for you and me? It means to take any porn sites off our
browser. It means not going to a certain movie, even if all your friends
are going. It means not participating in a conversation about sex. It
means memorizing scripture and quoting verses when lustful thoughts
fill our minds. It means finding someone to confide in and hold us
accountable if we continue to struggle with lust. It means honoring
Christ with our thoughts, words, and behavior.
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If you have already gone far past step 1, this is the time to , turn to
Jesus and be honest about your sin. Confession means that you agree
with him that your sin is wrong, disobedient, and ; destructive. It means
that you will make changes to ensure that it doesn’t happen again.
You can be assured of God’s great forgiveness, and you can also
be sure of his power as you tell that person you must make drastic
changes in your relationship. Get some help. Find a Christian counselor
or pastor to give you encouragement and wisdom so you can stay
strong in the face of confusion and criticism.
6. Wait for God to provide. Many young men and women believe they
need to experiment with as many people as possible in order to find
“the right person.” Even Christians fall into this trap. Instead, we need
to look to God to provide someone for us when and if that is his plan
for us. We are his, and he wants the best for us. We need to find our
completeness in him. That means he will lead us in one of the most
important decisions we will make in our lives.
Avoiding sexual lust is part of the answer. The other part is the pursuit
of purity of heart and mind. The standard Jesus sets is very high in this
area, just as it is in every other area of life: Fall in love with Jesus. Let
him be the one who fills your heart and gives you joy. Then treat every
person and every situation so that Jesus is pleased.
When we deny our selfish ambitions, take up our crosses of obedience,
and follow Jesus in the area of sexual purity, we be different really
different from this culture. When we walk out of a movie or change
a radio station, some will shake their heads, some will condemn, and
some will laugh at us. But Jesus will smile.
-Be still. Listen to what God is saying to you.
1. Think back over the last 24 hours. What sexually suggestive or explicit
messages have you been exposed to (including songs, commercials,
ads, movies, magazines, conversations, web sites, etc.)?
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DAY 26: SEX
2. Why do you think Jesus equated lust with the sin of adultery?
3. What does it mean to “pluck out” a lustful eye and “cut off’ a `lustful
hand? (Hint: This is not a call to physically hurt yourself?)
4. What are some ways you can flee sexual immorality? (Think back on
the messages you listed in Question 1. How can you avoid these?)
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DAY 26: SEX
5. Describe what it means to be pure in your thoughts and actions
regarding lust and sex.
6. Look over the suggestions. Which of these do you need to act on?
What specific action do you need to take? What assistance do you
need in order to take it?
7. Read Matthew 5:27-32. Think about each verse, then use it as a
guide as you pray.
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DAY 26: SEX
Memorize: Write Psalm 86:11-12 three times.
Lord, today you are calling me to die to selfish desires by:
You are calling me to obey in these areas
You are calling me to intimacy with you by:
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