JIGGY Mag - 1. Through My Eyes

JIGGY
society in synthesis
1. through my eyes

I‟m not really sure what‟s supposed to go in
an editor‟s letter, but I‟ll give it a go.
Welcome to JIGGY Mag, the first issue. This
issue is called Through My Eyes and I guess
it‟s really just an introduction to who I am
(me, Dani), what I see, the people that are
around me, my identity and all of that. A
collection of some photos I‟ve taken of my
friends over the past year, thoughts, poems
and conversations, this took quite some time
to create and it‟s no where near perfect, but
I‟m pretty happy with it. Massive thanks to all
my friends for supporting me and
contributing and just being general angels.
Dani

W
WHO AM I?
A GIRL? A FRIEND? A POET?
I AM…
H
O
A LOVER. I AM A SISTER. I AM
DRIFTING THROUGH LIFE AND QUESTIONING IT ALL.
I AM A THINKER;
TRYING TO UNDERSTAND WHAT WE ARE, WHY
WE ARE.
WHAT‟S THE PURPOSE?
IS THERE ANY?
I AM A NIHILIST.
ABSURDIST! ANARCHIST!
LIFE HAS NO MEANING, IS THERE A GOD?
WHY?
BECAUSE
BE.
I AM LIVING, I AM ALIVE,
I AM FEELING
SO MANY THINGS.
I AM DYING.

WE ALL ARE, BUT MORE ME BECAUSE
I AM SPECIAL.
AND NO ONE ELSE FEELS WHAT I FEEL.
I FEEL ALONE.
IN MY HEAD I AM A LONE EXISTENCE.
BUT I MATTER.
I MATTER.
I MATTER.

A poem by
a friend
“Gard'ner was written about a boy with the same
surname (no apostrophe). We were both drunk at a
park party and I was feeling rather dismal and plagued
by a sense of purposelessness. Then I eyed a ginger
boy stumbling about, like a stray comet felled, shouting
out nonsensical philosophies and quotations of his own
poetry. I saw my purpose for the night in him. I spent
the night looking after him and maybe even falling in
love with him a bit. I'm very grateful that this baby bird
fell from its nest into my lap.”

Gard'ner
On frameless days I wonder, How my heart would take
to meeting, An angel, on a magpie‟s night.
Would this heart of mine suffer, Palpitations, as he said
he loved another? Indebted are my eyes, for he is too
bright.
He'd hark of “light through yonder”, And these glass
eardrums would break. Unsealing my watchful window.
Would he unhinge his wings for me? Bestow them at
my feet, an offering? I pray for the felled jackdaw.
Would he kiss the lids of my blinded eyes, If he absorbed
the reflection in the orbs, And saw, Mother Medusa
in his place?
For every serpent head of his he'd sever, I'd grow him
another, at my own demise. And take his place as
Gard‟ner of Eden.
Would he ground himself with spirits, And then spew
his cataplectic soul, To me? It would be a crow‟s caw.
I think, if I should meet this dove-boy, My duty is to put
him back, In his tree, he'd sing songs of love to me.
By Owiny Lubangakene
IG: @glowiny

My dear, the stars are calling your
name. They want to know when
you’re coming home.

a conversation
with Blake Boatfield.

What is your sexual orientation?
Gay, however I do also identify as queer.
When did you first identify your sexuality?
I first fully identified as Gay around the age of fourteen, however
for the years prior to that I considered myself to be
somewhere on the bisexual spectrum.
At what age did it occur to you that you liked a certain gender
and how did you know?
For a long time I was romantically interested in girls, especially
for the first couple of years of Secondary School, but I had
always been sexually interested in males. Increasingly though
I became exclusively romantically and sexually interested in
boys.
Were you comfortable with your sexuality from the start or
was it a process - and how do you feel now?
While I personally have always been personally very comfortable
with my sexuality, many people around me were not. The
challenges I faced in being comfortable with my sexuality
came from my peers at school - whether through hypernormalised
heteronormativity, offensive stereotypes or even
outright homophobia - I felt as if I shouldn‟t be gay because
of the idea that this was a negative thing. However, through

What's it like being a young LGBTQ+ person and has it
shaped your experience as a teenager?
In many ways, isolating. Growing up I was never considered to be
„one of the boys‟ and would never participate in the traditional rites
of passage that young boys went through. As a result of this, I found
that I held closer friendships with girls, however they didn‟t fully
accept me into their groups either. I felt like I didn‟t belong with
anyone. My sexuality and how people have perceived me has shaped
how I think, act and respond in my everyday life.
Despite this, being a young LGBTQ+ person has given me a view on
the world that I would have never had a straight person. It has
allowed me to understand and emphasise with the struggle that so
many people have to endure everyday; it has allowed me to be
different, expressive and individual.

In your eyes, how do you think people our age, youths,
feel about LGBTQ+ people and everything queer?
I think that we as LGBTQ+ people have been incredible
fortunate to be the first generation to enjoy full equality in
the eyes of this nation‟s law and that this has been
reflected on the psyche of our generation. Our generation
is the most accepting to LGBTQ+ people and queer
media ever but there still is a lot of prejudice among
many social groups and demographics that needs to be
resolved.
Being LGBTQ+ in London and in our generation seems to
easier than anywhere else and in the past. Do you think
that there's still cause to be guarded and mindful?
I have participated in the Pride in London parade for
three years now and I agree that London is a
considerably more friendly place for LGBTQ+ people than
many other places in the country. However, often I find
myself afraid to walk down the street holding hands with
someone of the same sex, not because I am ashamed or
embarrassed but because I am afraid that something will
happen - which it has before. Because of that I think
there is still cause to be guarded and mindful in London.
Finally, who are your queer role models?
I would have to say that my biggest LGBTQ+ role models
at the moment are: left-wing columnist and author Owen
Jones; actress and television producer Laverne Cox; drag-

THE MORNING HUES?
ARE YOU INSPIRED BY...

OR DO YOU LIKE
THE NEAR-NIGHTTIME BLUES?

THE G

IRLS

Back in March this year, I did an on-the-spot interview,
well it was more of a conversation, and a mini shoot with
three of my friends; Rafiat, Shanay and Shervinia (left to
right), here‟s a little preview of it. We talked about identity,
issues relating to race, what it‟s like being black in
modern society, and intersectionality, what it‟s like being
a black female in modern society. Like I said, this was a
spontaneous thing so the questions and answers are
pretty casual and on-the-spot thoughts.

What do you love most about being black?
R: The fact that my hair grows towards heaven and not down towards
satan. (She‟s a devout Christian). I also, my skin, sometimes...
Why sometimes?
R: Because sometimes I have pigmentation and other issues like that,
it‟s just a bit jarring (that means annoying, for the non-South
Londoners).
What‟s your least favourite thing about being black?
R: The abuse that we get sometimes. I was called blik numerous times
in secondary school. And a boy called me a chocolate malteaser once. I
know it links to chocolate and everybody wants to be called chocolate
these days, BUT… you know. Whatever, it didn‟t really hurt my feelings
that much.
That was a while ago, how do you think you would react to that sort of
thing now that you‟re older?
R: Now I would just cuss him, I would say something rude about his
appearance... but not related to his skin tone, because that‟s mean,

What do you think needs to be done in order for society to be more progressive,
in regards to race?
R: I think there needs to be more social change, such as giving black people
more chance to elevate themselves in society because, and I know it‟s a stereotype,
but most black people, when they get money, they spend it recklessly
on lavish things… like yeah, opportunities for social mobility for the black population
need to increase.
What do you think about the BLM movement in America, do you think we
need it over here in the UK as well?
R: I feel like American activists only focus on the injustices against black people
in America and when it comes to the issues in Britain, such as the institutional
racism and like imperialism here they sort of shut it off, ignore it. And I
feel like they only reference Britain when they want to make really brash com-

"I think part of it is accepting that it's so much beauty in
being Black. And that's the thing that I guess I get
emotional about, because, I've always known that. I've
always been proud to be Black. Never wanted to be
nothing else. Loved everything about it, just...
It's such beauty in Black people, and it really saddens me
when we're not allow to express that pride in being Black;
and that if you do then it's considered anti-white. No! You
just pro-Black. And that's okay. The two don't go together.
Because you celebrate Black culture does not mean that
you don't like white culture; or that you putting it down.
It's just taking pride
What's irritating is when somebody says, you know,
'They're racist!' 'That's reverse racism!' or 'They have a
Black History Month, but we
don't have a White History
Month!'
Well, all we've ever been taught
is white history: so why are you
mad at that? Why does that
makes you angry? That is to
suppress me and to make me
not be proud."

A
R
I
A
N
N
E

HISHAM

Let‟s imagine my hypothetical, alternate world:
I want a Black police officer or any POC to shoot a good
man, a family man, an honest man, a WHITE man. I want
this to happen a lot. I want to hear about this every
week. I want to read retweets on Twitter and see angry
posts on Facebook. I want the newspapers to print
screenshots of CCTV footage. I want the media to corrupt
an innocent man. I want social media to share the
footage of these shootings; I want it to trend
worldwide. I want there to be a #WHITELIVESMATTER and
campaigns and protests across the globe. I want to see
white families reduced to tears in press conferences. I want
white people to come to resent the blindness and
INJUSTICE that exists in their world. I want those who
support this movement to feel as powerless and
defenceless as the MILLIONS of POCs who feel unsafe in
their own neighbourhoods, who are seemingly hunted
as prey to a predatory and unjust system, who are
picked off as carelessly as rats, who don‟t get the
justice they deserve, who don‟t get the representation
they need, who don't get the opportunity to impact
change, who don‟t get listened to because people are
now so desensitized to the killing of Black people.
I want nothing more but for the tables to be turned and
see how quickly things change.
EMPATHY IS EFFECUTAL

THANKS THANKS THANKS
Thanks to all my friends for letting me photograph
them constantly, it probably gets annoying but
thanks for putting up with me anyway, massive
thank you to Owiny, Blake, Shervinia, Shanay,
Rafiat, Iman and Ishy for their contributions to this
issue, and thanks for reading this. I‟ll end it with a
really cute photo of my friends Hiab and Ishy.