FLQ MAGAZINE 2ND ISSUE

SEX CANDY
. WE ARE NOT
UST OUR…
e penis gets all the press, but men
ve "many erogenous zones," says
ychologist Melodie Schaefer, PsyD.
en tend not to correct women
cause they're afraid women will shut
wn and not touch them at all. But
re are many places a woman should
ch." Like the chest, the inner thighs
d face. Two other key areas: Gently
pping a man's testicles can be a real
n-on, as it blends control with
ease. Also, stimulating the
rineum, the area between the
otum and anus, will heighten
asure during oral sex.
4. WE ENCOURAGE
FANTASIES
"Men want to share their fantasies but worry their
wives will shame or judge them," says Dr. Kort.
Similarly, Dr. Schaefer reports that men wish
women would reveal their imaginings. Want to
open yourself to these possibilities? Try making a
game of it. First, and most important, promise not to
judge the other; then, privately write out scenarios
that have tantalized you and place them in a box.
When you are next intimate, pull one out. If you're
both comfortable, give it a shot. If not, Dr. Kort
recommends asking the author a key question:
What about this fantasy do you like? Sometimes, its
themes can be addressed in different, more
comfortable scenarios.
5.WE FEAR INTIMACY…
…but not for the reason you think! Studies have shown that boys are more
affectionate, even more expressive, than girls until they reach school age. At
that time, social repression begins—of words, thoughts, feelings—and our
desire for human connection goes underground. So taboo is this desire for
intimacy that its possibility can terrify men—not because it's smothering,
but because we realize how desperate we are for it. What's a woman to do?
First, understand that your guy's hasty retreat post-sex may be about his
own shock at how much he craves a connection with you (and how much
he's denied it in life). Then, retreat a little yourself. This gives him time to
see that his boyhood habits are, in fact, perfectly manly.
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