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happened if I’d refused. There’s no law telling us to be beastly to Orientals–quite the contrary. But–
it’s just that one daren’t be loyal to an Oriental when it means going against the others. It doesn’t do.
If I’d stuck out against signing the notice I’d have been in disgrace at the Club for a week or two. So I
funked it, as usual.’
‘Please, Mr Flory, please! Possitively you will make me uncomfortable if you continue. Ass though
I could not make all allowances for your position!’
‘Our motto, you know, is, “In India, do as the English do”.’
‘Of course, of course. And a most noble motto. “Hanging together”, ass you call it. It iss the secret
of your superiority to we Orientals.’
‘Well, it’s never much use saying one’s sorry. But what I did come here to say was that it shan’t
happen again. In fact——’
‘Now, now, Mr Flory, you will oblige me by saying no more upon this subject. It iss all over and
forgotten. Please to drink up your beer before it becomes ass hot ass tea. Also, I have a thing to tell
you. You have not asked for my news yet.’
‘Ah, your news. What is your news, by the way? How’s everything been going all this time? How’s
Ma Britannia? Still moribund?’
‘Aha, very low, very low! But not so low ass I. I am in deep waters, my friend.’
‘What? U Po Kyin again? Is he still libelling you?’
‘If he iss libelling me! This time it iss–well, it iss something diabolical. My friend, you have heard
of this rebellion that is supposed to be on the point of breaking out in the district?’
‘I’ve heard a lot of talk. Westfield’s been out bent on slaughter, but I hear he can’t find any rebels.
Only the usual village Hampdens who won’t pay their taxes.’
‘Ah yes. Wretched fools! Do you know how much iss the tax that most of them have refused to pay?
Five rupees! They will get tired of it and pay up presently. We have this trouble every year. But ass
for the rebellion–the so-called rebellion, Mr Flory–I wish you to know that there iss more in it than
meets the eye.’
‘Oh? What?’
To Flory’s surprise the doctor made such a violent gesture of anger that he spilled most of his beer.
He put his glass down on the veranda rail and burst out:
‘It iss U Po Kyin again! That unutterable scoundrel! That crocodile deprived of natural feeling!
That–that——’
‘Go on. “That obscene trunk of humours, that swol’n parcel of dropsies, that bolting-hutch of
beastliness”–go on. What’s he been up to now?’
‘A villainy unparalleled–’ and here the doctor outlined the plot for a sham rebellion, very much as
U Po Kyin had explained it to Ma Kin. The only detail not known to him was U Po Kyin’s intention of
getting himself elected to the European Club. The doctor’s face could not accurately be said to flush,
but it grew several shades blacker in his anger. Flory was so astonished that he remained standing up.
‘The cunning old devil! Who’d have thought he had it in him? But how did you manage to find all
this out?’