TWINS - February 2018

Living with
know-it-alls
Get your
twins to
sleep
longer
at night
February 2018
www.twinsmagazine.com
using
stories
to teach
your twins
five
ways to help your
twins’ get more
exercise

table of
contents
February 2018
In Every Issue
Twins in the News _________4
Double Takes ____________34
Your adorable photos of twins
Feature Articles
Using stories_____________26
to teach your twins
Learning without the lectures
by Aria Gunman
Twins and kitchen _______ 28
safety
Keeping little hands out of trouble
by Shane Borrowman
It’s cold and flu___________ 30
season
Seven fever myths
by Steven J. Sainsbury, M.D.
Are your twins active _____ 32
enough?
Help them get more exercise
by Aria Gunman
Columns
My twins have ____________ 5
separate birthdays
Neat, but what about birthday
parties?
by Chantal Meijer
Mom2Mom ______________ 8
Which one of your twins is the evil
one?
by Theresa Halvorsen
The twin truth __________ 34
Sharing bedrooms, a twin’s honest
opinion
by Jennifer Jordan
Ages & Stages
Pregnancy
Over 35 and expecting: ____ 10
your guide to expecting
multiples
by Dr. James Byrne
Before you name them, ____ 12
consider these tips
by Ruby Coats Mosher
Twinfants
Monthly milestones _______ 14
for multiples in the first year
A simple way to get ________ 16
your twins to sleep longer at
night
by Allison Randall Gatt
Toddler Twins
Chomp! Five tips for _______ 18
dealing with children
who bite
by Laura Sky Brown
Preschool Twins
Babysitting your babies: ____ 20
consider these tips
by Patricia Edminster, Ph.D.
School Age Twins
Living with know-it-alls: ____ 22
when your twins have all the
answers
by Katherine M. Carlman
A self-confidence _________ 24
check up
by Judith O. Hooper
24
A self-confidence
check up
Twins and kitchen
28 safety
32
Are your twins
active enough?
Cover Photography by Jenko Ataman

Volume 35 Number 1
February 2018 Founded in 1984
OWNED AND Published by
Panoptic Media Marketing Inc. dba:
TWINS Magazine
publisher@twinsmagazine.com
Editor-in-chief
Laura Cunningham
twinseditor@twinsmagazine.com
PRODUCTION ASSISTANT
Katie Slocombe
katie.slocombe@panoptic-media.com
Art Director
artdirector@twinsmagazine.com
Customer Service
customerservice@twinsmagazine.com
SENIOr MEDIA REPRESENTATIVE
Natalie Morris
natalie.morris@americas-media.com
Editorial ContributOrS
Shane Borrowman; Laura Sky Brown;
James Byrne, M.D.; Katherine M.
Carlman; Ruby Coats Mosher; Laura
Cunningham; Patricia Edminster, Ph.D.;
Aria Gunman; Theresa Halvorsen;
Judith O. Hooper; Jennifer Jordan;
Chantal Meijer; Allison Randall Gatt;
Steven J. Sainsbury, M.D.
Main Contact Phone Number
Tel: 1-833-766-3342
www.twinsmagazine.com
ANOTEFROMTHEEDITOR
It’s our birthday! TWINS is 34 years old!
Hello and welcome to our first issue of 2018! it’s
a big edition for us... that’s right! TWINS Magazine
is turning 34! We’re in good twin company, as
celebrity twin Scarlett Johansson is also turning 34
later this year. We’re sure that she and her co-twin,
Hunter, will be celebrating in style.
I’d like to take a moment to say thank you for
helping us reach this birthday. Each and every one
of our readers is the lifeblood that keeps us going,
and we couldn’t do it without you. You’ve shown
us so much support over the years, and nowhere
is this shown more than through all your Double
Takes submissions!
We were overwhelmed this month with how
many fantastic pictures you, the readers, sent in.
It’s always a difficult task to choose which ones
to put in, but this time it was almost impossible.
The response to the call for Double Takes was the
largest we have ever had, so to celebrate we’ve
made the Double Takes section 50% bigger. If you
entered, do take a look to see if your little ones
made it in. Don’t be disheartened if they aren’t in
this issue - keep submitting and hopefully they can
be featured in the future!
We hope you enjoy this issue of TWINS Magazine
as much as we always enjoy putting it together.
So much has changed since 1984 - here’s to
another 34 years of all things TWINS!
Sincerely,
Laura Cunningham
Laura Cunningham,
Editor-in-Chief
Follow TWINS Magazine on social media...
February 2018 3

TWINSINTHENEWS
Bankrupted by giving
birth to premature twins
caps and pre-existing conditions
ever become a limit to my children’s
access to healthcare, I have
no idea how we will navigate this
system. This system is not set up to
support families with catastrophic
medical bills.”
It’s twins! And again! And
again!
to go back to school to become an
OB/GYN.
Her advice to new twin moms
is: “Accept any help you receive,
ask for help, and make sure your
husband or partner is contributing
equally to the workload at home.
And secondly, don’t take anything
seriously - unless it’s actually serious,
of course!”
You can find out more about
her life with three sets of twins and
a singleton on her blog:
www.tripletwinning.com.
Jen Sinconis has opened up
about her experience of having
twins sixteen weeks early,
and the millions of dollars it cost to
save their lives.
She writes: “It had never occurred
to me the financial repercussions
someone could encounter
because of an ongoing medical
situation. We were a middle-class
family with college degrees and
solid full-time jobs in marketing
and construction management.
We owned our house, had very
little debt, a savings account,
retirement accounts and comprehensive
medical insurance.”
Despite it all, Jen and her husband
had to sell their house and
ended up filing for bankruptcy just
to pay for the medical bills. Eleven
years later, her twins (Aidan and
Ethan) are healthier than the doctors
predicted, but it was a long
road to solvency.
Jen says: “When Trump was
elected I cried myself to sleep,
knowing that one of his first agenda
items would be overturning
the Affordable Care Act. If lifetime
One mom has beaten one
in 500,000 odds after
giving birth to twins for
the third time. Misty Lang, 35, is a
twin herself, and imagined being
a monther to one or two children.
Instead she has ended up with
seven children. She had her first
set of twins (Alex and Lexie) nine
years ago, then gave birth to a
singleton (Calista) two years later.
She then went on to have another
set of twins, Lacie and Nash,
who are five, and she has recently
welcomed set three: Lana and
Phoenix.
Misty said she was “happy and
scared all at once - we were going
to have five kids under three. But
once the initial shock passed, we
were incredibly excited.” Once her
children get a little older, she plans
Just how heritable is
autism? Twins research
suggests it’s more than
we think
A
team of researchers at
King’s College London
has been combing data
from over 4,700 twin pairs in a
Twins Early Development Study
has found that the heritability of
autism is 50%. This is inline with
results from previous twin studies,
but is far higher than the 6%
estimate from single-nucleotide
polymorphisms. A
4 TWINS Magazine A www.twinsmagazine.com

My twins have separate birthdays
by Chantal Meijer
To some sharp-eyed person reading my family’s
medical card, it looks like a typo—two
kids with the same surname, born ONE day
apart. That can’t be right, they invariably say.
For years, I’ve been tickled pink to tell them—
and anyone else who’ll listen to my tale—why isn’t
a typo at all: They’re identical twin boys, born on
either side of midnight.
So, how did this birth happen—the timing,
I mean—and just how did we handle our boys’
birthdays over the years, as brand-new parents
with everything to learn? Easy—we held one
birthday party, with one double-sized cake. And
we always celebrated on the first-born’s birthday.
Why wait another day? At least, that was the plan.
Most of the time.
My boys rushed into this world after my water
broke as I answered the front door one morning,
three weeks before my due date. My startled dad,
who had stopped by while on his way to a jobsite,
stood transfixed. “Perfect,” I said, as I ruminated on
the saying “the child born on the Sabbath day is
bonnie and blight”, or words to that effect.
My husband Rick was hundreds of miles away,
not due back until the next day. “Phone Rick, Dad,”
I blurted as I wobbled towards my suitcase.
For the entire day, my eyes were riveted on the
hospital-room clock, first at the small local facility
where I was admitted, then at a larger regional
hospital requiring an hour-long ambulance ride.
As the hands closed in on midnight, the doctor
called for forceps.
I braced myself; sometime later I heard his
voice ring out: “It’s a boy! Congratulations. Time of
birth ... 11:59!”
Moments later: “It’s another boy! Time of birth
... 12:04!” My husband arrived the next day, after
being grounded by fog for a day. He grinned from
ear to ear.
On our sons’ first birthday, I invited half the
town—every mom from my prenatal group, every
person I had ever met. The party was as much for
me as for the boys; validation that I’d survived the
Neat thing, but what about birthday parties?
ordeal. The cake, awash with both names, was as
big as the baker dared make it.
Years later, one birthday party for the twins
required two cakes, the exception to my birthday-party
mantra. The boys, in Batman and Superman
mode at the time, had individual Batman and
Superman cakes.
But in general, we stuck to my mantra: one
party, one cake. Why mess with a good thing?
Besides, the boys thought having one party was
perfectly fine.
Gigantic Cake
Over the years, we took a gazillion photos—our
twins and our other two (singletons), six and nine
years younger. For the twins’ photos, I used a little
trick: I positioned the first-born on the right, so
over the years we’d always know who’s who in
photos.
For their 16th, each had a separate party. The
first-born had his first, with his friends, and invited
his twin brother, with the brother’s friends.
The next day, the secondborn did the same thing
again. Same group.
We returned to the tried-and-true format.
Recently, our sons graduated from university.
As fate would have it, convocation ceremonies fell
on the first-born’s birthday. Wow, try and beat that!
My maternal antennae were twitching with
double delight. Their cake, an impetus for the baker’s
retirement, again was as big as he dared make
it! It included everything: Congratulations for their
birthdays, their graduations, their golden retrievers
(that’s another story), and on and on.
Every now and then, someone, someplace still
asks me the timeless question about their separate
birth-dates: “Is that a typo, ma’am?”
My chest puffs, almost to its old nursing size.
A smile spreads across my beatified face. My
words flow sweet as chocolate syrup on vanilla ice
cream: “They’re identical twins, born either side of
midnight,” I gush. That won’t ever grow old. Unlike
cake. A
February 2018 5

Which one of
your twins is
the evil one?
6 TWINS Magazine A www.twinsmagazine.com
by Theresa Halvorsen

MOM2MOM
boys must be twins,” a woman said to
me in the Target check-out line. “Yep,” I
“Your
said. I kept my focus on unloading my cart
and watching my eight-year old twins. One of
them pulled a yo-yo off a display and begged for
it (promising to clean the whole house if only he
could have the toy), while the other ran up to push
buttons on the registry kiosk.
“How old are they?” the lady asked.
“Eight,” I said stacking the two loaves of bread,
four containers of juice, eight boxes of cereal,
ten cans of peas and corn, and four packages of
boy’s socks onto the conveyer belt. I sighed. They
weren’t even teenagers and I could barely keep up
with the food shopping.
“They’re so handsome.”
“Thank you,” I said automatically. This was nothing
new. Older people often liked the looks of my
identical tow-headed sons with their gap-toothed
smiles.
“Which one is the evil one?” the lady asked.
“Excuse me?”
“You know, which one is the bad one?” Of all
the comments twin parents get from complete
strangers, this is the one I hate the most. I can
handle the identical or fraternal question (identical,
even though their hair is cut differently—yes, they
can still be identical twins with different haircuts),
if I used fertility drugs (nope), if they’re in the
same classroom (yep) and comments about how
high-energy they are. But I can’t handle strangers
asking me if one of my sons is evil. What parent
could?
But is one of my twins more of a challenge to
raise than the other? Is there one I discipline more
or is in more trouble at school? And the answer is
yes, with a big asterisk next to it.
One of my sons, Alex, does very well at school.
He gets good grades, does his homework and is
adored by his teachers and sports coaches. He’s
rarely in trouble and if he is, he’s in trouble with
a group of other kids. Conversely, my other son,
Hunter, doesn’t like school. It’s a battle to get him
to do homework and if he doesn’t enjoy a subject,
he’s not going learn about it. In addition, if
he doesn’t understand a rule, or why the rule is in
place, he’s more likely to break it. According to this
woman at Target, Hunter would be the evil one.
But it’s not that easy. Alex is a people-pleaser.
He follows the rules because it makes people
happy with him. He works hard in school and on
sporting teams because the adults like him better
when he does. While this is a great trait, I’m concerned
when he’s in high school he may want to
please his friends more than teachers or his dad
and I. As a teenager will he end up as the ‘evil’ one?
And what about when he’s an adult? Is he going
to be able to think outside the box and see things
from different angles? Or is he going to be trapped
in that box trying to make everyone like him? Is
Alex going to be miserable as an adult because of
his need to please everyone?
Hunter, on the other hand, is my non-conformist.
He’s the class clown, the weird one and he
doesn’t care what anyone thinks about him. He’s
swallowed a quarter (and gotten it lodged in his
throat), needed stitches in his forehead after tying
his jacket around his head so he couldn’t see where
he was going and flooded the bathroom doing
a science experiment. In school, his teachers find
him challenging and his sports coaches tend to
‘forget’ he’s there and not put him in during games.
But Hunter has an amazing imagination and a
unique way of looking at the world. He loves art,
music and telling outrageous stories about places
he’s never been (one time when I was sixteen
and on Mars…) If he can get through school with
that imagination intact, I know he won’t be doing
drugs in high school because all of his friends are
doing them. If I can get him through school as
a non-conformist I’ll know when he tells me he’s
dropped out of college to play his guitar, it was his
choice and he’s doing what makes him happy.
As I write this, I realize how happy I am they
have each other, because they need the traits the
other twin offers. Alex needs Hunter to help him
use his imagination and see things outside of society’s
rules. And Hunter needs Alex’s structure to
help him learn about rules and the importance of
obeying them. They’re the perfect twin team. So
to answer that lady, neither of my sons are evil, but
they do have traits that present challenges to their
father and I. A
February 2018 7

Sharing bedrooms
by Jennifer Jordan
a twin’s honest opinion
PARENTS ALWAYS ASK:
I know a lot of twins who share a bedroom. This can
often be difficult because twins are usually together
so much anyway. Is there any advice that you can offer
to help twins feel as if their shared bedroom is a place
where they can express individuality?
JENNIFER’S TAKE:
For twins, sharing a room is almost as unavoidable as
sharing a womb. It is as if there is an unwritten rule
stating that twins must stay in the same place; bunk
beds were made for us. This unwritten rule certainly
applied to my twin sister and me.
From the time we were born until we were 12, we
shared a room. Even though our family had a spare
bedroom in our house—one that either of us would
have happily occupied—this room was used as a place
to keep our toys. When we were 4, this spare room was
given to the new addition in our family, our younger
sister. The fact that she got her own room and my twin
sister and I had to share one seemed, in our opinion, to
go against everything good and pure in the world.
Our parents, however, didn’t see it this way. Whenever
we asked why we had to share a room, they
would utter the monozygotic mantra, “Because you’re
twins.” This, to them, was based on logic. To my twin
and me it was based on lunacy: Each of us should have
had our own room and our younger sister could go live
in the garage.
But, alas, our request wasn’t granted. At first,
sharing a room was no big deal. However, at about
age 5, when we started to develop our own identities,
sharing a room seemed to hold us back from being
individuals.
Now, the fact that a room can hold back twins may
seem odd. A lot of siblings, twins and otherwise, share
a room when they’re young. But, for twins, sharing
a room further compounds the lack of individualism
they already face. For my twin and me, we could
never get away from each other; we were each other’s
stalkers. We went to school together, played together,
had the same friends. Even when we fought—pulling
each other’s hair or calling each other names—our
parents would punish us by sending us to our room,
where we would, once again, be stuck together. There
was simply nowhere to go to be an individual. Kids use
their rooms as a way to express themselves, hanging
up pictures on the wall or arranging stuffed animals in
a certain order. For my twin and me, however, we really
could only express ourselves together, discarding
completely any concept of selfexpression: We could
only decorate our room in a manner upon which we
both agreed.
To this day, I can remember being 7 years old and
8 TWINS Magazine A www.twinsmagazine.com

wanting to hang up a poster of Steve Watson, a Denver
Bronco’s receiver. Because my sister hated sports, I
wasn’t allowed to hang up my poster on our bedroom
wall and instead had to hang Steve up in the corner of
my closet, a crevice so dark I couldn’t even stare into
his dreamy eyes. I remember thinking the only reason
Steve was consigned to the closet was because my sister
and I were twins and our room had to contain only
things we both liked.
For parents whose twins share a room, keep in
mind that twins need their own space, probably even
more than other siblings do. Some twins might be
okay with sharing everything, and may even prefer
it, but those who exhibit even the slightest desire for
separation should not be ignored.
One good thing to do is give each twin a corner
of their room to use for whatever they want. Whether
they want to decorate their corner with stuffed animals
or decorate it with pictures they have drawn, their corner
is where they are allowed to go for self-expression.
This individual corner is each person’s “own room” in
the room that they share.
If twins ask why they need to share a room, avoid
answering, “Because you’re twins.” This isn’t what twins
want—or need—to hear. It’s a saying that makes twins
feel as though they are being punished for something
they can’t control, and didn’t ask for. Instead of uttering
this statement, ask them what they think a good
alternative to sharing a room would be. You might be
surprised at what they come up with. If their alternative
can’t be met (e.g., if the garage proves too cold for
their younger sibling) ask them what can be done to
make them happier with their rooming-in situation.
Let your twins know they don’t have to agree on
everything; if one twin wants a red comforter and one
wants blue, let them know that’s okay. Twins are often
geared to believe that they must do everything the
same, in lockstep.
It’s as if twins are taught that having differences
will some how shatter their “twin pact.” However, twins
who express differences and embrace these differences
will have a much easier time than twins who are
under the impression they must be identical in every
aspect. If twins possess differences of opinions in how
they want their room to look, allow them to express
these differences in a positive manner.
Teaching twins they don’t have to agree on
everything is one of the most valuable lessons a parent
can offer. A
Coming next issue...
Our April issue is full to the
brim with all things TWINS,
including adjusting to life with
twins plus one, cloth diapers,
communication tips and so
much more!
We’re now accepting your
photos of your twins/multiples
to run in our Double Takes
section.
Simply go to
twinsmagazine.com/double-takes
to submit your images.
All
ages and
twin types
welcome!
Submit by:
March 19,
2018
Holiday 2017 9

PREGNANCY
by Dr. James Byrne
Clinical Professor of Obstetrics
and Gynecology and Maternal
Fetal Medicine at Stanford
University School of Medicine
This advice is intended
as a guide. If you have
any concerns, please discuss
them directly with
your doctor or other
medical professional.
Over 35
& Expecting
Your health guide to expecting multiples
Congratulations! You’re embarking on
what is arguably the most challenging
and rewarding experience of your life. Just
as you would not go into the wilderness unprepared
— it’s important that you prepare for your
upcoming adventure. By learning about possible
medical challenges, you can better participate in
obtaining the safest pregnancy possible for you
and your new bundles of joy. Two major areas to
explore are your health and common pregnancy
complications.
MATERNAL HEALTH FACTORS
Ideally, women actively improve their lifestyle
including a healthy diet and exercise to lose any
excess weight even prior to getting pregnant.
Given the obesity statistics in the U.S. you can
see the value of pre-conception care and getting
into the best physical shape possible. Pregnancy,
particularly with twins, is a significant physical
demand on your body including the heart and
muscles. Unlike exercise, this demand continues
around the clock for many months. Another
10 TWINS Magazine A www.twinsmagazine.com

eason to improve your overall
health is that being overweight is
associated with increased risk of
high blood pressure and diabetes.
Lifestyle modifications often create
the safest possible environment.
Especially for women over
the age of 35, pre-existing health
conditions can result in increased
medical problems during twin
pregnancies. The most common
are high blood pressure and diabetes.
It’s important to recognize
these risks and work proactively
with your doctor in order to have
the healthiest children. OB/GYN’s
and other pregnancy professionals
watch for signs of pre-existing
hypertension and for new onset
of pregnancy hypertension conditions
(such as preeclampsia). These
occur in about 1 in 5 pregnant
women over 35 with twins and
OB/GYN doctors are well skilled at
this aspect of care.
Diabetes is also very common
in women over 35 who are pregnant
with twins. In fact, diabetes
affects approximately 1 in 3
women in this group. Diabetes
may have existed prior to the
pregnancy or it may develop as a
new condition (Gestational diabetes).
Even Gestational diabetes
can harm the unborn child if not
identified and managed appropriately.
Risk to the child can include
being too large and result in birth
injury. Poorly controlled diabetes
can increase the long-term risks of
pediatric and adult obesity, which
harm your child for decades into
the future.
Fortunately, this common condition
is typically managed successfully
with proper diet and self
testing of blood sugars at home.
Occasionally some women will
need to be on medications to control
their blood sugar and protect
their child. This can be achieved by
taking oral pills or by injections of
insulin. For women who need this
special care, their OB/GYN doctor
will usually work with either a Maternal
Fetal Medicine (MFM) doctor
or an endocrinologist. While this
is a lot of work for most women,
this additional care clearly benefits
unborn children now and into the
future.
All medical conditions become
more common as we age and
pregnant women are not immune
from this. So, it’s important to be
proactive and be sure to have your
health care provider check your
overall health including your thyroid
function. Also, let your provider
know immediately if you have
medical conditions such as lupus,
asthma or any heart conditions.
A TWINS Magazine
COMMON PREGNANCY
FACTORS
It is well known that women
carrying twins or other multiples
are more likely to deliver prematurely.
This rate is even higher in
women who are over age 35 and
in women with any of the medical
conditions noted above. More
than half of women with multiples
who are older than 35 will deliver
prematurely. Fortunately, the majority
of these births occurs after
34 weeks and is associated with
only minor risk to the children.
Their care can usually be provided
in local community hospitals and
consists of helping the newborns
cope with issues such as jaundice
and problems with feeding. However,
there is also risk for births
prior to 34 weeks. Twins born this
early often need more advanced
levels of medical care found in
level 3 Neonatal Intensive Care
Units (NICU). Due to prematurity,
these babies face more challenges
including risks related to their
lungs and brains. Fortunately most
will do well with modern medical
care even though it is emotionally
challenging for their parents.
Fortunately, preterm labor
can often be predicted by several
factors including the mom’s medical
status as well as with special tests.
These tests include special ultrasounds
of the cervix and a test for
fetal fibronectin. The fetal fibronectin
test (fFN Test) is performed much
like a pap smear with a special swab
and results are usually available
within four hours. A negative test
result means there is less than one
percent chance of delivery from
preterm labor in the next 14 days. If
the test is positive it allows the OB/
Gyn doctor to prepare for possible
preterm birth. One of the most
important interventions to protect
preterm children involves medications
(such as beta-methasone) that
are given to the mother and then
cross the placenta to strengthen
the babies’ lungs and blood vessels.
Preparation may also involve your
doctor coordinating care with other
physicians or hospitals skilled in the
care of preemie babies. The March
of Dimes is one organization with
excellent website resources regarding
preterm labor assessment tool
kits as well as wonderful materials
to help educate and support families
with preterm birth (see www.
marchofdimes.com).
While this medical information
can all seem overwhelming at first,
the most important thing for any
woman expecting twins is to be
aware of what can occur and be
proactive working with her doctor
to improve the health outcomes
for her children. After all, you are
your best advocate for your health
and the health of your children. Be
proactive, educated, and enjoy! A
February 2018 11

PREGNANCY
Before you
name them,
consider
these tips
joseph
karen
daniel
carl
natalie
roberta
katie
bradley
by Ruby Coats Mosher
Do you have names picked out yet? Every
expectant parent hears that question
dozens of times before their bundle (or
bundles!) of joy arrives.
Why is everyone so interested in “Baby’s”
name? Because it gives him an identity, almost
a personality, answers those who have
studies the phenomenon. “Every name sends
out signals,” say Linda Rosenkrantz and Pamela
Redmond Satran, authors of the book, Beyond
Jennifer and Jason: An Enlightened Guide to
Naming Your Baby. “It transmits messages and
reverberations of its own: a level of energy and
intensity of color and sheen, and a texture.”
Although it is often difficult to come up with
a name for one baby, let alone two, three or
more, the following are some basic questions
expectant parents choosing multiple monikers
are best advised to ask themselves.
1. Is each easy to pronounce?
Since your children’s names will be spoken many
times over their lifetimes, try not to saddle any of
them with a tongue-twister. Catch potential problems
with pronunciation by repeating the name
aloud several times in succession. Practice with and
without the middle name. Zane Noble, for example,
looks great in writing but when spoken, the repeating
“n” sounds can fuse into something sounding
like Zane Oble. If the speaker tried to pronounce
each “n” separately, the name might then sound like
Zana Noble.
2. Does each have a pleasing rhythm?
While practicing a name for pronunciation, also
note the rhythmic quality. Does the name roll off
your tongue like a melody or do you prefer it to
sound more “sing-along”, as in the name “Mary Jane
Rein?”
3. Do the initials spell F.A.T.?
Children can be charming, kind and innocent.
They can also be thoughtlessly cruel. Historically, a
schoolage “game” many children play is inspecting
each other’s initials for dirty words or unflattering
names, then taunting their owners. Think of the fun
they’d have with Patrick Edward Eubanks, Frances
Alice Tatman or Bradley Michael Wright? You
can’t outsmart a child, but you can do your best
to think like one. Examine the initials of a name in
every combination of first, middle and last. Watch
not only for words but also abbreviated sentences
formed by letters that sound like words (a, b, c, I, m,
n, p, r, u), Ida May Butts might not be happy with her
initials when she goes to school.
4. Is the spelling of each unusual?
Rosenkrantz and Satran advise against deviating
the spelling or pronunciation of a common name.
For instance, you should think twice about changing
the spelling of Cindy to Cyndi because of the
potential confusion involved. Also, don’t expect
others to pronounce Maria with a long “i”, no matter
how clearly you explain it on a kindergarten form.
Both Cyndi and Maria can expect to spend the rest
of their lives correcting other people’s attempts at
pronouncing and spelling their names.
12 TWINS Magazine A www.twinsmagazine.com

There are many considerations
when choosing names for your
multiples. Some are more important
than others, but more parents
will agree that the following hint
offered by Bill Cosby in his book,
Fatherhood, is one to pay attention
to: “Always end the name of your
child with a vowel, so that when
you yell, the name will carry…”
Special dos and don’ts
for naming multiples
Don’t Rhyme.
Resist the temptation to choose
rhyming names. Twenty-two-yearold
Karla remembers the confusion
caused by her sister’s rhyming
name. “At school, classmates and
teachers would sometimes call me
Marla, my sister’s name. That really
bothered me. The only reason
people were confused was because
of our names. I mean, I had
short brown hair and Marla’s hair
was long and blonde—we were
totally different.”
Don’t Make A “Precious Pair”.
To foster the individuality of your
multiples, avoid the temptation
to give them names that make it
easy for others to lump them into
a category; it will be hard enough
to keep them from calling your
children “the twins”. Naming your
girls Heather and Daisy, for example,
may forever brand them “the
flower girls.”
Don’t Fall Into the Same
Initial Trap.
If you cannot resist using same-initial
first names, make sure the middle
initials are different. There is
too much potential for the mix-up
of records and other information
when there are two J.A. Smiths
that went to the same school, have
the same parents, same address,
same birthday, etc.
Don’t Forget Nicknames.
We live in a society that loves to
shorten names into nicknames.
Be sure to consider all possible
nicknames. Will it sound like fingernails
scratching a chalkboard to
you when your daughter, Elizabeth,
is called Liz, Betsy or Libby by
her friends?
Also, avoid choosing names for
your multiples that have the same
nickname. Parings such as Robert
and Roberta, or Christine and
Christopher, offer the potential for
mix-ups—some of them embarrassing.
For example, does Gerald
or Geraldine get to open a letter
“To Gerry” marked “SWAK”?
Do Maintain Consistency of
Style and Tone.
Names can be grouped into
categories such as contemporary,
classic, artistic, attractive and
studious. Rosenkrantz and Satran
recommend selecting family
names out of one category or
another. Keep in mind that some
names such as Brittany, sound
contemporary, while others, such
as Pearl, have an old-fashioned
ring to them.
Do Choose Several Names for
Each Sex.
The ultrasound technician says,
“Congrats! You are going to have
twin girls.” Does that mean you
can totally concentrate on names
for girls? No way! These tests are
not always 100 percent accurate in
predicting babies’ sexes. Furthermore,
there have been cases of a
third baby remaining undetected
by an ultrasound. Your best bet
would be to have an extra name or
two for each sex—just in case. A
A TWINS Magazine
Most popular names
for twin pairings
Girl/Girl Twins
1. Ella & Emma
2. Olivia & Sophia
3. Gabriella & Isabella
4. Faith & Hope
5. Ava & Emma
6. Isabella & Sophia
7. Madison & Morgan
8. Ava & Ella
9. Ava & Olivia
10. Mackenzie & Madison
Girl/Boy Twins
1. Madison & Mason
2. Emma & Ethan
3. Taylor & Tyler
4. Madison & Michael
5. Jayda & Jayden
6. Madison & Matthew
7. Samuel & Sophia
8. Addison & Aiden
9. Olivia & Owen
10. Zachary & Zoe
Boy/Boy Twins
1. Jacob & Joshua
2. Ethan & Evan
3. Jayden & Jordan
4. Daniel & David
5. Matthew & Michael
6. Landon & Logan
7. Elijah & Isaiah
8. Jacob & Joseph
9. Jayden & Jaylen
10. Isaac & Isaiah
Source: Social Security Administration
(SSA). Popular Baby Names. 2017.
February 2018 13

Monthly-
INFANTS
MONTH 1
Head flops back if unsupported • Strong
reflex jerkiness • Roots to breast • Grasps
rattle or finger briefly • Startles unexpectedly
(Moro reflex) • “Molds” to person
holding baby • Focuses on face within 6
inches • Makes eye contact • Sees
large black & white patterns •
Prefers human face to other
patterns • Cries for assistance
• Turns head toward familiar
sounds, voices
MONTH 4
Lifts head to 90 degrees • Supports
upper body with arms briefly when on
tummy • Rolls over one way • Grasps
rattle or slim objects • Smiles at reflection
in mirror • More able to self-soothe
• Smiles and gurgles to gain attention •
Makes consonant sounds • Reaches for
objects • Responds to music • Begins to
display memory
MONTH 2 MONTH 5
Lifts head at 45 degrees • Holds object
for few seconds • Focuses on objects
several feet away Bats hands at objects
• Smiles at familiar sounds, voices, faces
• Soothes self with sucking • Shows anticipation,
excitement • Coos and gurgles
when happy • Begins to recognize
voices, faces, objects
Holds head steady when sitting or held
• Guides dangling toys to mouth • Sucks
toes • Holds bottle w/one or both hands
• Vocalizes more to gain attention •
Responds to others’ emotions • Imitates
sounds: vowels and consonants • Seeks
fallen objects, reaches for objects • Curious
about new environments • Protests if
toy is taken away
MONTH 3
Raises head, chest when lying on tummy
• Tracks moving objects side-to side
• Puts both hands together • Laughs,
squeals at play; cries when play stops •
Distinguishes parents and familiar faces
• Follows moving objects with eyes •
Studies own hands, feet • Sees colors
MONTH 6
Bears some weight on legs when held •
Turns head in both directions • “Swims” &
pushes when on tummy • Wants to feed
self, play with food • Expresses pleasure
and displeasure • Shows anxiety at separating
from mom • Reacts negatively to
strangers • Recognizes own name • Combines
sounds • Studies, compares objects
• Twists & turns in all directions
14 8 TWINS TWINS Magazine Magazine www.TwinsMagazine.com A www.twinsmagazine.com

A TWINS Magazine
TWINS Magazine
Milestones
4-Multiples in the 1st Year
MONTH 7
Sits without support • Rolls over in both
directions • Rocks on hands and knees
• May crawl, forward or backward • Balances
head well • Eats a cracker without
being fed • Shows sense of humor •
Demonstrates social orientation Says
“Mama” and “Dada” • Waves bye-bye
Sits alone and plays by self • Pursues
& picks up objects • Crawls forward or
backward • Pulls self up on tables, chairs
• Stands while holding onto something
Demands attention • Pushes away
unwanted objects such as toys and food
• Smiles at own image in mirror • Claps
hands, plays patty-cake • Recalls events,
out-of-sight people, objects
MONTH 10
MONTH 8
MONTH 11
Walks around furniture • Sits in upright
position • Carries objects in one hand
• Dances to music • Plays peek-a-boo •
Enjoys social interaction, attention • Becomes
very self-aware • Displays moods
• Babbles & chatters • Points to nose,
mouth, ears on request • Likes to roll
ball back to you, toss objects • Imitates
gestures, face expressions, sounds •
Understands meaning of “no” • Follows
simple instructions, commands • Curious,
wants to discover contents of drawers,
cabinets, purses, boxes
Becomes well-balanced • Squats
and stoops • Stands on tiptoes • Sits
intentionally without falling • Tastes,
chews everything • Fits small objects
inside larger ones • Expresses wants w/
gestures & sounds • Pulls off socks, unties
shoes • Seeks approval, shows stubbornness
• Helps dress self • Describes
objects, people, places • Drinks from a
cup w/o assistance • Links words with
objects, places • Recognizes &learns
sexual identity
MONTH 9
Pulls to sitting position from stomach
• Pulls to standing from sitting • Begins
to climb • Cries simply because twin is
crying • Passes toy from one hand to the
other • Eats finger foods • Likes to perform
for an audience • Wants to play near
mother/father • Uses objects (telephone,
hairbrush, spoon) appropriately • Locates
lost or hidden objects easily • Gets bored
with repetition of same game or activity
• Begins to evaluate people’s moods •
Performs for an audience and will repeat
the act if applauded
MONTH 12
Crawls up & down stairs • Stands alone •
May try to walk • May climb out of crib,
highchair • Shows affection to favorite
people, toys • Demonstrates needs w/o
crying • Resists napping • Throws temper
tantrums • May become picky eater • Imitates
words • Identifies animals, objects,
colors in picture books • Turns pages of
books (sometimes in clumps) • Recalls
objects, people for longer times
February July/August 2018 2011 9 15

A Simple Way to
INFANTS
Get Your Twins
to Sleep Longer
at Night
by Allison Randall Gatt
16 TWINS Magazine A www.twinsmagazine.com

A TWINS Magazine
When you bring
home those
double (or triple)
bundles of joy, you divide
the amount of sleep you’re
getting. Sleep and sanity
were a big priority when we
brought home our fraternal
twin girls, so once we got
through the first weeks of
foot-dragging, gritty-eyed
sleep deprivation, we knew
it was time to work on
getting everyone a good
night’s sleep. Thank heaven;
I had a friend who shared
this simple and effective
method to get her ‘twinfant’
boys to sleep all night.
Here’s how to do it:
Bridget let me in on her
little secret—with relatively
little work ‘sleep-training’,
she stretched out her boys’
nighttime sleep little by
little. She did it like this:
when the first baby woke,
she tucked him in the swing
to rock for as long as she
could (even ten minutes the
first few times is sufficient)
before she woke the other
and feeding them both.
By feeding your babies
at the same time, you’ll be
better able to get them to
sleep at the same time. I was
fortunate enough to be able
to tuck the waking twin in
her Boppy chair with a pacifier
for 30-40 minutes before
she started to really fuss, or
her sister woke up. While
I couldn’t go back to sleep
during this time—leaving
her in her chair would have
been unsafe—I could at
least catch up with my Facebook
friends at 2am. The
investment in sleep for the
future, long-term, is what
you’re aiming for.
For example: After sleeping
for four hours, Twin
A wakes at 2am. Get her
up and whisk her into the
Boppy, the swing or the
rocker. Try to maintain at
least ten minutes of calm
and then wake Twin B. Feed
them both.
The next night, when
Twin B wakes at 2:30am,
hold her off until 2:45, then
wake Twin A and feed them
both. Try to stretch this
block of night sleep to six or
seven hours. After a week of
doing this, both of my little
girls were sleeping at least
eight hours, just a few days
shy of ten weeks old.
It might take a bit of work
(get your partner involved,
and make it teamwork) but
when your twins are giving
you a good night’s sleep, you
can hi-five everyone in your
family and smile, because
you’re relatively well-rested.
Before you start:
Make sure your little critters
are old enough and big
enough. They should be
between seven and eight
pounds, and at least six
weeks old. Preemies are a
whole other ballgame, and
they’ll take a little longer to
adjust to this thing called
life. Remember when a
book or an expert says to
start something at a certain
age; you’re really counting
from their due date, not their
actual date of birth.
I highly recommend
getting your twins or multiples
on a regular schedule
of eating and sleeping. If
you’re not ready to get that
regimented, then try at least
to feed them at the same
time. Give them an extra
feed or two in the evening
to ‘top-up’ and make bedtime
an especially calm and
soothing with cozy pajamas
and a quick story or a song.
This will give them the idea
that now is the time to relax
and go to sleep for the night.
Remember, it may be a
bit of work, but with a plan
in mind, you’re investing in
a well-rested future — you
and your children’s. A
February 2018 17

TODDLERS
CHOMP: Five tips for dealing
with children who bite
Few things can make a parent’s heart skip a beat
like the sight of fresh teeth marks in skin. What
makes toddlers bite, anyway, and what can you do
about it? Parenting books and experiences parents agree
that biting incidents usually start sometime soon after
teething and peak at 15 to 18 months, when toddlers
have teeth but don’t yet have the verbal skills they need
to express themselves easily. The book Positive Discipline
A to Z, revised and expended 2nd edition: From Toddlers to
Teens, 1001 Solutions to Everyday Parenting Problems by
Jane Nelson, Lynn Lott, and H. Stephen Glenn explains
that “children who bite often do so when they become
frustrated in social situations and do not know how to
express themselves in acceptable ways. Children also may
bite their parents and think it’s a game.”
Stuart Kirsch of Middleborough, Mass., had that problem
with twins Jason & Rina. “Jason would bully and push
Rina around, and her response was to bite back.” At least
they kept a sense of humor. “We used to joke that when it
was time to go to the dentist we’d only have to take Jason
because the dentist could see the imprint of Rina’s teeth
on his arms.” If one of more of your children has started
expressing themselves though biting, you may be tempted
to bite back, but here are some better ideas to get you
though this challenging stage.
1. Watch for warning signs and plan
ahead
You can probably tell when your child is getting frustrated
or on the edge of crankiness. It’s helpful to try to
notice in advance when a biting incident may occur. Terry
Kusche of Loudonville, NY, knows exactly what sets off
her 16-month-old twins Sean & Matthew: frustration or
fatigue. And she knows why. “The biting came on as a
response to not being able to verbalize anything. Matthew
would bite Sean when they are behind a [baby] gate
and cannot get to me or one twin when the other has a
toy he wants. Matthew will generally bite first because
he gets frustrated more easily.” Think about how you can
keep your children from becoming frustrated and over
stimulated. IF they are in a crabby mood, maybe this is
not the day to make them share their toys or wait too
long for your attention. In What to Expect in the Toddler
Years by Arlene Eisenberg, Heide E. Murkoff and Sandee E.
Hathaway suggestions are given for curbing aggression:
Supervise your toddlers’ play closely, take breaks each day
for quiet time, avoid intense one-on-one play during your
by Laura Sky Brown
children’s most tired time of day and provide acceptable
outlets like running, jumping, dancing, or even pillow
fights for that pent-up energy.
Kushe has learned a few things about planning ahead.
“I have found if I keep the kids busy they are less likely
to bite. My boys are very physical children, so they like
to be very active. It helps to vary their days with outside
time, errand and shopping time, and indoor time so they
don’t get bored or stuck on the same things, which I have
found leads to their getting frustrated more quickly. Toys
that they seem to fight over I have two of, bit this is not
always a solution because they will still want the other’s
toy, even if it is the same.” Because Kusche knows how to
predict a biting incident at her house, she can often stop
it before it happens. “With a close eye” she says, “I can get
though the day bite free.”
2. Look for the good side of your kids
It’s especially important for parents of multiples to avoid
labeling one child good and the other bad, even though
one child is usually the aggressor against the other. If you
react too intensely, the aggressor may continue biting
just to get your attention. In the words of radio psychologist
Dr. Joy Brown, “Children would rather be praised
that punished, but they would rather be punished that
ignored.” Make sure you are giving positive attention to
the easily frustrated child, praising things he does that
you like. Don’t wait until he hurts the other child to offer
one-on-one time with you. And don’t gush offer the
injured child excessively, lest he take on the role of martyr
and cause even more conflict in the long run.
3. Be consistent with consequences
When a biting incident happens, you need to be prepared
with a response that is predictable and rational. Erin McKelvie
of Cary NC had a problem with her daughter Emily
frequently biting her twin brother Eric. “The biting began
soon after they turned 1 and lasted for many anguished
months,” she says. “Battles over toys or books were usually
the trigger. I tried time-outs and they struck out. Eventually
I followed our pediatrician’s advice. I sympathize
with the victim and remove him from the room, thereby
isolating the aggressor. When Emily bit her brother, I
firmly told her Eric and I could not play with her when she
was biting.”
What to Expect in the Toddler Years offers similar advice:
“Focus your immediate attention on rescuing the victim
18 TWINS Magazine A www.twinsmagazine.com

A TWINS Magazine
rather than admonishing the perpetrator.” Once the victim
has been reassured, turn your attention to the biter. “Calmly,
and without anger, explain briefly that the behavior is
unacceptable, and why.” McKelvie’s advice to parents of a
biter is similar. “Tell the aggressor that it’s okay to be angry
but try to use words, like that perennial toddler favorite −
NO! − before baring teeth to resolve the argument.”
4. Just remain calm
If you have ever caught yourself throwing a book across
the room in anger or slamming a plate down on the table
− and who hasn’t − you understand frustration. You also
know that is not the way to encourage rational behavior
in children, so try to apologize soon afterward and explain
that you were frustrated and your behavior was inappropriate.
In the same way, when your child bites, an angry or
violent response from you does not get across the message
that aggressive acting out is wrong, it could backfire
by encouraging more of the same. McKelvie received
some misguided advice of that type.
“Just bite her, urged her own mother.
‘Shove a bar of soap in her mouth,’ advised
a friend. I dismissed both ideas
as too violent or too radical. What
kind of role model would I be if I bit
or tortured my child?” Dr. Benjamin
Spock agrees, writing in Baby and
Child Care “Parents can control their
children better by staying in charge
as a friendly boss than by descending
to her age level to battle with
bites, slaps, or shouts.”
With patience and words, not
anger, Lisa Edwards of Fargo ND was
able to solve biting by her identical
twins, Tyler and Chad, now 4 years old. “I
tried everything in the book from spanking,
which didn’t work, to time-outs,
which only worked sometimes. They
always seemed to bite one another
when they fought over a toy, which
was pretty often. It used to drive me
nuts! I would always tell them that
biting hurts, and then I would make
them hug and comfort each other, and
I would take away whatever they were
fighting over. To this day, when one
sees he has hurt his twin or they realize
they have hurt each other, they
comfort and hug one another without
my encouraging them to do it.
It makes me so proud that at such a
young age they have learned how
to be concerned and how to show
affection toward each other.”
5. Remember that time heals all
wounds
Eventually, Kirsh’s 2-year-old Rina got over her urge to bite
her twin Jason. Her dad Stuart explains, “Stern rebukes and
the occasional three-second time-out helped some, but
she just seemed to outgrow the phase, as Jason did with
his bullying.” McKelvie had the same experience. “We finally
licked our biting problem with the only surefire method:
time. Emily simply grew out of it. Most importantly, she
gained language and could express her anger more effectively.
I knew she had been biting out of frustration. Emily
and Eric are 2 ½ now and I am happy to say the biting
episodes are over, hopefully forever.”
Keep talking to your children, help them learn to talk
about their feelings and take a few deep breaths. Eventually,
like so many other stages, this too shall pass. Before
you know it your twins will be running to you with
a long list of complaints about the other’s
behavior- but at least they’ll be
using their mouths in a more
constructive way. A
February 2018 19

Babysitting
PRESCHOOL
your
babies
Consider
these tips &
strategies
by Patricia Edminster, Ph.D.
Wouldn’t it be wonderful if we could
all find Mary Poppins to care for our
children? No worries about discipline,
who is the one in charge, the children’s
safety, cleanliness and health? Unfortunately,
caregivers like Mary are few and far between.
But leaving young youngsters in the care of
others, whether it is full-time or just an occasional
evening out doesn’t have to be a
nightmare, either.
Regardless of the amount of time the sitter
will be watching your children, you can be
more relaxed when you’re out and about if
you are sure of the sitter’s qualifications, clear
about your expectations in terms of house
rules and how consequences should be
applied, and thorough in your preparation of
safety information (emergency numbers, cell
phone numbers, a nearby neighbor that can
help) and health products (first-aid kit, etc.)
In addition, you need to be sensitive to
both the sitter’s and your children’s needs.
For the sitter’s benefit, you need to be clear
on what the job entails. What will be the
hours? What is the rate of pay? Is transportation
provided or expected as part of the
job? What are the children’s schedules? How
closely should the sitter enforce them? What
should the sitter do if the children don’t behave?
20 TWINS Magazine A www.twinsmagazine.com

One of the best ways to train
both the sitter and the children—
and to evaluate whether or not
a certain person is the one you
want to have caring for your multiples—is
to hold a trial run, giving
the sitter a few hours or half a
day with your children while you
are in the house. You can show
her the ropes, see how the children
respond to her, model your
discipline style for her (noting any
modifications you make for each
child), and have a chance to troubleshoot
any problems that seem
likely to arise.
For the trial run, make it clear
to the sitter as well as the children
that you expect the sitter to ask
you questions regarding how to
handle situations, that you expect
him or her to tell you if there are
problems with misbehavior, and
that you expect the children to
obey the sitter or to expect the
normal consequences for ignoring
instructions.
Again, it is critical that all
concerned know what the house
rules are, for although the sitter
is in charge, your expectation is
that he or she will manage things
the way you want them managed.
This does not mean that you
cannot give them all some leeway
in rules and scheduling. Many
parents have established that having
a sitter over for the evening is
a special treat for the children—a
time when they can stay up a little
later, or have an extra story, or
watch a special DVD, thus creating
a positive reaction to those nights,
as opposed to a feeling of abandonment,
when parents take time
for themselves. Parents should go
over these expectations; however,
with the sitter in the children’s
presence, so all parties understand
them.
When yoUr MoM’s
The sITTer
Sometimes a family member, often
a grandparent, may be the sitter.
This can present its own special
benefits, but also its own special
problems. The expectation, of
course, is that this is a person who
really cares about the children,
and that is wonderful! However,
sometimes Grandma has her own
opinions of what to do and how
to do it, and her parenting style
might not agree with yours. This
situation requires the same type
of discussion regarding child-rearing
guidelines and house rules as
required with any sitter, even if she
is your own mother.
One mom who was concerned
about offending her mother with
rules that differed from those
enforced when she was a child,
made up a chart of the house
rules, which she posted on the
refrigerator and went over with
her mother and the children, just
as she did with any other babysitter.
This showed her mother that
the children knew the rules and
were accustomed to doing things
a certain way.
It also gave her a chance to
explain to her mother what the
rationale was behind the rules,
which was helpful, for some of
them were quite different from the
rules in place when she had been
growing up.
Do keep in mind, however,
that some grandparents have very
definite ideas about how things
should be done. If their ways are
significantly different from yours
and not likely to change, you
need to be realistic, deciding for
yourself how comfortable you are
with their ignoring the rules for an
entire evening, or, for that matter,
being too strict. If you are not
A TWINS Magazine
comfortable with the possibility
that they might just do their own
thing, you may want to confine
their visits to times when you
are there, and use someone less
connected to the family as your
sitter. A
When They don’T MInd
The sITTer…
With multiples, as with all other
siblings, you may find that one
child may be better behaved
than another with a particular
sitter. This can be due to many
reasons. The child may have a
pattern of provocative behavior
with authority figures, perhaps
even you; so you may need to
give information, along with
information about how you handle
such behavior, to the sitter
in preparation for the event.
Another occurrence may be due
to personality differences. We
often find that some children
respond better to one individual
than do others.
In this case, it is important to
listen to the children’s feelings as
well as the sitter’s explanation.
Discuss what occurred, how it
was handled, and what should
happen next time, if there is one.
Occasionally, you may find that
a sitter plays favorites between
or among the children, and that
can provoke misbehavior on
the part of one or more. The
key here is to try to get accurate
information so that it doesn’t
happen again.
If you hear from the children
or a neighbor, or your own suspicions
suggest that something is
not right, investigate, or go with
your intuition and find a different
sitter. Your children’s health,
safety and happiness are too
important to risk taking chances.
February 2018 21

SCHOOL
Living with
know-it-alls
by Katherine M. Carlman
We all know people who have answers for
everything. But what happens when
the know-it-alls in your life turn out to
be your twins? It’s enough to make any self-respecting
parent question both her sanity and her
knowledge.
“The problem is my twins know bits and pieces
of things, but they don’t know it all,” says Lisa
Villandry of Biddeford, Maine, mother of Alex and
Erik, 6-year-old first graders*. “They think they do,
but they don’t.”
While the urge to inform twins that they don’t
know it all may be overpowering, Constance Wood,
Ph.D., a child psychologist in private practice in
Houston, Texas points out that children just want to
be respected as independent thinkers. Parents, she
suggests, need to “recognize and praise their children
for thinking as individuals.” Since children are
taking steps to establish themselves as individuals
apart from their parents, this advice is crucial to your
child’s self-esteem. Lisa, however, is the first to admit
that when it comes to dealing with know-it-all twins
on a daily basis, it tries a parent’s patience. “The
other day, for instance,” says Lisa, “one of my twins
asked what day it was. ‘Wednesday’ I answered. He
promptly responded, ‘No, it’s Tuesday.’”
Such a response is typical of the know-it-all syndrome,
but when a twin sibling steps in to back up
the know-it-all, it can be difficult for parents. When
Lisa’s son stepped in to agree with his twin, she
admits that it caused her to doubt herself. “Two of
them are saying the same thing, so does that make
me right or wrong? They make you second-guess
yourself.”
While allowing kids to express their opinions
is important, it’s just as important for children to
know who’s in charge. Dr. Wood reminds us that the
When your twins have
all the answers
parent has the right to make the final decision. “As
they get older, they can have more input, but as the
parents, you have the final say.”
This can be a comforting fact for parents of twins
who often feel overwhelmed by the demands their
children place on them. When the know-it-all syndrome
rears its ugly head, the main thing for parents
to remember is not to turn it into a power struggle.
“It is one way children try to express their own ideas,”
Dr. Wood says, “and they need to be praised for
doing do.”
A STEP TOWARD GREATER UNDERSTANDING
Timothy Dunnigan, Ph.D., a clinical psychologist in
San Diego, California, suggests parents should try to
teach their child to view differences of opinion as an
opportunity to achieve greater understanding of another
person’s position. By approaching your child
with questions like, “Tell me why you think that?” or
“Well, what about this?” parents can help their children
reconsider their initial position.
With twins, however, not every situation will
allow for such questioning. After a winter snowstorm
closed Hartford, Connecticut area schools
for two days before a long weekend, Janette Harris’
twins Ashleigh and Alexander had been out of
school for five days. With a science project due, her
son was upset. Although Janette tried convincing
her son that the teacher would allow extra time because
of the weather, he could not be swayed.
“No matter what I said, Alexander had it in his
mind he was right, and that was that,” Janette said.
Alexander convinced his ride home that he had permission
to stay after school to work on the project
and in doing so; he started a series of events that left
his mother scrambling to track him down and his
teacher driving him home.
22 TWINS Magazine A www.twinsmagazine.com

“Through it all, his twin, Ashleigh, remained silent
and let it all unfold,” Janette observed. “Later, I asked
her, ‘If you knew the project date had changed, why
didn’t you say something to your brother?’ but she
said that she just wanted to see how far things would
go.”
While parents like to think they always have the
right answers, sometimes we must admit we do not.
There will be times when your children are right. By
approaching know-it-alls with respect and questioning
how they’re formulating certain ideas and answers,
Dr. Dunnigan says parents are taking a positive
approach.
When Alexander did not go home with the carpool
as planned, he put himself in a potentially dangerous
situation. Although he believed he was right, his
parents were unsure of his whereabouts. The entire
event became a stressful situation.
HOW SCHOOL IMPACTS THE SITUATION
The know-it-all stage begins at about age 4 and
continues until adulthood when children begin to
view their parents as peers, says Nancy Eiswirth, Ph.D.,
a child psychologist in private practice in Hartford,
Connecticut. While school attendance does not mean
children will have all the answers, it has a direct impact.
Dr. Eiswrith goes on to say that, “being
able to have answers to things in everyday
life helps children to reaffirm that
they’re able to master the information
given to them in school.”
Debbie Silvey, a teacher in Fayetteville,
Tennessee, and mother
of college-age twin daughters,
agrees that school plays a role.
When her daughters were
younger and in separate classrooms,
Debbie says they would
return home from school each insisting
her teacher was right about a
certain subject or topic. “I had to let
them know that there’s more than one
way of looking at things and teachers
can teach in different ways.”
Debbie has had four or five sets
of twins in her own classroom
over the years and admits that
know-it-alls can be challenging.
Dr. Dunnigan agrees that because
twins share so many experiences,
they’re more likely to
A TWINS Magazine
believe the same things. “They reinforce each other’s
beliefs.” So if one twin believes something, or states a
‘fact’, the co-twin is likely to follow suit.
REMEMBER YOUR FUNNY BONE
All moms have experience with know-it-alls, but twins
often team up to make life even more challenging for
parents of multiples. Mary Pat Allen of Littleton, Colorado,
is a mother of four, including 8-year-old twins*.
She recalls one day when they were younger and she
found her boy/girl twins naked in the shower stall. “I
had followed the trail of clothes—first the shoes, then
socks and overalls, to the bathroom door. I heard
Annabelle and Christian giggling, opened the door,
and found them slathering each other with shaving
cream,” Mary says. “I was angry, and said to them, ‘This
is naughty!’ ‘No, Mommy, they responded, ‘this is fun!’”
Mary’s experience brings up the importance of
humor in our lives. If your children seem to know all
the answers, laughter can be a lifesaver. Dr. Eiswirth
believes humor is a valuable tool in dealing with
know-italls. “It’s important to diffuse the situations
with humor whenever possible. You don’t want it to
become a power struggle.” Remembering to smile
when your twins are insisting the earth is flat will put
you ahead of the game and keep everyone happier in
the long run. A
*At the time of writing.
February 2018 23

A Self Confidence
SCHOOL
Check
Up
by Judith O. Hooper
In today’s world, there’s probably nothing you
can give each of your middle-years multiples
that has greater value than self-confidence. A
self-confident child is comfortable, secure and
happy with herself and her world. She is not always
right, sometimes makes mistakes and faces various
difficulties, but, overall, she is OK and she knows it.
It seems like such a simple concept – being OK
and knowing it. Yet this simple concept is really
the core of the successful child and, ultimately, the
successful adult. No external measure of success for
adults or children, be it fame, fortune, good grades
or musical talent, for example, is as accurate as that
internal sense of “I’m OK.” In addition, no external appearances
of success can convince the unconfident
person that she is OK.
As you think about the self-confidence of your
middle-years multiples, it’s important to distinguish
between an insecure or unconfident child and one
with a retiring personality. It’s easy to confuse these
two things because of our cultural definition of a
confident person. Most people would say that a
person who has confidence is, for example, one who
stands up for herself, speaks up and says what is on her
mind, exhibits leadership qualities, is talkative and vivacious,
has numerous friends, and is involved in many
activities. In fact, though, these are descriptions of
personality traits rather than confidence. It is quite
possible for a confident person to be reticent, quiet
and calm; be involved in few activities; and have only
a few close friends.
EVALUATING YOUR CHILDREN’S SELF-CONFIDENCE
What can you look for when you are trying to assess
your children’s self-confidence? Begin by consid-
24 TWINS Magazine A www.twinsmagazine.com

ering each of your children’s general attitudes about
themselves. You can usually do this by watching for
three specific behavior patterns:
• How she ‘walks through her world’
• What she says about herself
• How she interacts with others
How she ‘walks through her world’ — As a therapist,
I learn a great deal about a child’s self-confidence by
watching her enter the play therapy room, or ‘walk
through her world.’ Of course, if it’s her first visit, she will
be somewhat cautious as she enters, which is appropriate.
Even the most self-confident people need to be
cautious when they enter new situations; they need to
be prepared to protect themselves if necessary.
However, despite her caution, the self-confident child
walks directly into the room rather than lingering in the
hall, peeking in or resisting being brought in. She looks
around her to see where she is and to find out what is in
the room. If she sees something that she finds interesting,
she moves nearer to it to view it more closely. She
also stands straight rather than hunched in on herself.
She makes no attempt to hide behind or under furniture,
though she may stay fairly close to the wall or immediately
sit in a chair. She walks looks and behaves like
someone who feels OK about herself.
What she says about herself — A younger unconfident
child is often quite straightforward about describing
how she feels about herself. She is likely to say things
such as, “Oh! I’m always flubbing things up,” “I’m such a
dummy because I only got 75% on my spelling test” or
“They won’t want me to go. I can’t swim very well, and
they know it.”
By the middle years, though, especially the later
middle years, the unconfident child may have stopped
saying these things out loud, even though she still feels
them inside. A middle-years child is more likely to say,
“Everyone always accuses me of flubbing up,” “Spelling
tests are stupid; no one needs to know all those words
anyway” or “I hate swimming, so I don’t want to go.”
How she interacts with others — A self-confident child
can play happily with other children at least some of the
time. She can, most of the time, resist pressure to do
things she knows are wrong, and she can often defend
herself and others against bullying. Her relationships
are not necessarily always happy; she can get angry and
fight when she feels put upon.
Even if her personality is more retiring and she tends
to follow rather than lead, she will not usually follow
others into trouble or be led to be “bad”. She may enjoy
A TWINS Magazine
solitary activities, but she will have close friends and
enjoy spending time with them. She does not act upset
if left out of an activity, though she may need some help
in restoring relationships every now and then.
THE EBB AND FLOW OF SELF-CONFIDENCE
It is important to remember that just as your own level
of self-confidence may vary depending upon your mood
and the situation, so will each of your children’s. A child
who shows every sign of feeling OK about her own self
this week may suddenly withdraw, talk down about herself
and walk around looking unhappy next week.
Your careful and supportive questioning of your child
can often help you discover if there is a real problem
that your child feels is too difficult for her to handle;
in many cases, that feeling may be undermining her
self-confidence. In addition, a bully, an unexpected low
grade on a test, a teacher whose standards are unrealistic
for a child or a parent who is tense and irritable
because of problems at work can temporarily affect a
child’s self-confidence. When assessing each of your
children’s level of self-confidence, consider whether your
child displays self-confidence more often than not.
THE TWIN FACTOR
As you consider the self-confidence of your middle-years
twins, you may discover that one of them displays more
self-confidence than the other. As you may have observed,
it is not uncommon for one child to assume the
leadership role in a twinship. For the most part, this kind
of difference between co-twins seems to reflect personality
differences more than it reflects their levels of
self-confidence.
However, it is possible for one twin to have developed
more self-confidence than her co-twin, perhaps
because of her leadership ability. When one twin always
leads, it is possible for her co-twin to think to herself, “I
can’t do that. It’s a good thing she can.”
If you notice that your twins’ natural leader/follower
roles are affecting their selfconfidence, it is important to
try to make some changes. For example, you may need
to create ways for the follower to have more opportunities
to lead or to have some successes on her own so
that they can’t be ascribed to her co-twin.
You may also notice that your twins have different
ways in which they express their self-confidence. Your
child who gets things accomplished quietly and steadily
may be just as confident as her co-twin who accomplishes
tasks in a loud and somewhat cocky manner. In fact,
it’s quite possible that a child’s display of cockiness may
actually be a cover-up for his lack of confidence. A
February 2018 25

Using
stories
to teach your
twins
by Aria Gunman
Teaching children is not an easy task, and
when you have twins the struggle is doubled.
If your twins are anything like mine,
conventional learning methods were often
tuned out when their impish behavior took
over. They could read my “mom’s got a lesson
for us” face, and would do whatever it took to
get back to having fun.
More often than not, my lessons turned into
a nagging session as I pleaded with my twins
to listen to me.
Teaching your kids to be safe is one of the
most important responsibilities you hold as a
parent. It doesn’t have to painful. In fact, it can
even be fun and easily incorporated into your
regular routine. I was reading to my twins every
night anyway, so extending these sessions
with some simple questions ensured that they
learned and remembered important lessons
each day. And the best part? I didn’t have to
nag them to listen. They were almost always
engaged and eager to learn, even though they
had always hated my boring lectures before.
Here are the top five reasons why using
stories can be an effective way to teach your
twins:
26 TWINS Magazine A www.twinsmagazine.com

1
The child doesn’t feel threatened. It’s not
another lecture.
When we read to our children, we are able to
address a situation in a non-threatening way. What do
I mean by threatening? Let’s take a look at some examples
of habitual phrases we tend to use when “teaching
our lesson”:
• “You shouldn’t lie.”
• “You are so messy.”
• “You shouldn’t be scared. You are just being silly.”
• “You are not listening to me.”
Usually this is done in a blaming or angry tone of
voice. When we finger point and use the word “you”,
children hear negative and the situation becomes
tense. Some may even become defensive. Put yourselves
in their shoes. If someone were to start attacking
you with words, would you be in a teachable mood? I
would think not. Rather than focusing on the solutions
to the problems, children are focusing on their feelings
of anger, hurt or fear that they are experiencing at that
moment.
Using stories to teach, we take out the blame and
place less emphasis on the problem. We talk and
discuss solutions and speak positively. So instead of a
lecture, we now have a healthy discussion.
2
Working on “prevention” and “cure”.
When we use stories to teach, we can help
our children work through situations they are
currently experiencing. It also allows us to mentally
prepare them for situations that may arise. Children
gain experience vicariously through the stories we read.
Children are able to learn from vicarious experience just
as well as they learn from real ones. The only difference
is that this kind of learning takes place in the safety of
your home. For example, you could use a book about
being bullied to teach your child what to do if and
when they face such a situation.
3
The child has a model to follow. They identify
with the characters in the book.
Children make connections with the characters
of the stories you relate. You can help them further
by asking questions such as:
• Is there anyone in the book who reminds you of
yourself?
• How is that character like you?
• Which character would you like to be?
• Why would you want to be that character?
Relate the lesson to their own lives and experiences:
Like the little pig who built a house of bricks, what
would you do make your house strong?
After reading the story of The Little Engine That Could,
my daughter began to identify herself with the Little
Blue Engine who said “I think I can, I think I can, I think
I can.” It served to be a good model for her to follow at
times when she felt inadequate.
4
Children remember stories better than
they remember reprimands. It’s a good
way to catch their attention.
In Making Connections: Teaching and the Human
Brain (Addison-Wesley, 1994), Renate and Geoffrey
Caine states, “There is strong reason to believe that
organization of information in story form is a natural
brain process... In a nutshell, neuroscience is discovering
that the brain is wired to organize, retain and access
information through story. If that is true, then teaching
through story means that students will be able to
remember what is taught, access that information, and
apply it more readily.”
Maybe this is why children can rattle off dialog from
their favorite shows but can’t remember what mom said
about picking up their toys.
5
It allows for critical thinking.
Stories are a safe way for children to explore
emotions and behaviors. A book like Jane Simmons’
Come Along, Daisy, encourages children to think
about the importance of keeping close to parents when
out and about. Use thought provoking questions that
will lead them to identify problems and feelings such
as “How did Daisy get separated from her mother?” and
“What was Daisy feeling when she found her mother
missing?”
The best kind of teaching you can employ is to teach
our children to be authors of solutions. Ask leading
questions that will underscore the point of the story
such as “How can Daisy avoid getting lost in the future?”
What a boost it will be to your children to know they
can come up with such genius solutions.
Reading and sharing stories with your children can
help you become a better parent. It opens the channel
of communication and strengthens the parent-child
bond. The magic of stories can be a powerful influence
for good. Does that magic exist in your home? If not,
start reading to your twins today. A
February 2018 27

Twins
&
Kitchen Safety
by Shane Borrowman
Elizabeth and I have twins who began walking
well before their first birthday—and immediately
walked into trouble, particularly in the kitchen.
Because I cook the majority of our meals and my wife
bakes frequently, the kitchen is a hub of activity. John
and Samantha want to be near us, and being near us
in the kitchen puts them in harm’s way. We took all the
usual precautions covered in baby safety articles: a latch
on the oven door, clips that hold drawers and cupboards
closed, covers on the electrical outlets. It wasn’t
enough. The accident happened when my wife was
baking cookies.
Our son, who’d only learned to walk days before, saw
the open oven door and rushed it. Before we could react,
his tiny hand slapped flat onto the pre-heated surface. He
began to scream and to howl. I don’t panic easily. I panic
spectacularly.
Gathering John up in my arms, I ran for the bathroom,
enacting a half-formed plan to get his hand under cold
running water. Logically, it would have been both easier and
quicker to use the kitchen sink, and not running headlong
through the house might have kept him from panicking,
too. It certainly would have added less drama to this unfolding
trauma. Ah, hindsight. Instead of reacting logically,
I grabbed, ran, and generally made a bad situation terrible.
Worse, I have no memory of where Sam (John’s twin sister)
was during any of this. I’d been lying on the living room
floor, lifting her above me and tickling her belly, when John
screamed in pain. I guess I set her down,
ran to the kitchen, etc. I guess. Presumably,
she sat on the floor
where I’d left her, not
crying and not panicking while me (and my wife) did both.
Urgent Care dealt with the burn, while Tylenol handled
the lingering pain. I dealt with the guilt, shame, and horror
of what had happened by turning John’s hand into a
bandage-wrapped club— as if extra layers of dressing could
undo his first trauma (our first as parents). Before I could
trust the kitchen again, changes had to be made. None of
them major. All of them significant.
Scribble on This
During graduate school I once rented an apartment where
the bathroom walls had been covered by not wallpaper but
contact paper—it was a gray granite sort of pattern. This
paper had been applied over the original plaster—lumpy
and crumbling—leaving the walls with a through-the-looking-glass
sort of unevenness. Since living in this apartment, I
have carried an irrational dislike of contact paper—a dislike
now erased by its usefulness in my kitchen. Specifically,
after John’s injury, I looked for ways to keep small hands
busy and safe while keeping them close to me. I found contact
paper that doubles as a chalkboard. At the end of my
kitchen cupboards and on the far side of the island, I pasted
two sheets of this rough black paper. I bought sidewalk
chalk—its size perfect for toddler hands and also slightly
less likely to snap under pressure—and kept it in a tiny
bucket in the nearest cupboard (see below). For less than
$10.00, I kept John and Sam occupied at a safe distance
from the stove. We’re still working on coloring only on the
paper and not on the walls, floor, dog, or each other.
No Latches Here
No toddler can remain focused upon a single
activity for long, and twins are no exception
to this rule. The contact paper chalkboard
worked as a place to start, but writing
on a chalkboard is a single activity
that grows stale in isolation. To keep
things less monotonous, I emptied
out the nearest cupboard—the furthest
from the stove—and loaded it
with toys. Noisy toys. The cupboard
acts as a safe place to store the
chalk, but, like a simple cardboard
box; its own lure
is irresistible. So it’s
a safe place to store
the twins, too.
28 TWINS Magazine A www.twinsmagazine.com

When not coloring with chalk or playing with those
noisy toys—the bells and whistles help me keep track of the
kids’ location even with my back turned—John and Sam
often crawl into the cupboard and close the door behind
them. The door cracks open occasionally as I cook or wash
dishes, mostly to emit a burst of dad-can’t-find-us giggles.
There’s not much storage in my kitchen, and the loss of a
cupboard is hard to bear. But there are worse things to lose
than cupboard space.
Don’t Cross that Line
When I work around the home, I always buy more supplies
than I need, assuming on some level that the extra material
will come in handy later. As John and Sam colored on their
chalkboard and played in their cupboard, I looked for a
clear, visual cue to tell them where not to be while I cook. I
needed a safety zone around the stove and between the
stove and sink—the high-traffic cooking space.
The kitchen floor is a virtually unbroken, seamless
expanse of linoleum, and the layout provides no obvious
spatial divisions. Chalk lines rub off too easily, while inked
lines don’t rub off easily enough; colored masking tape
leaves glue splotches that must be peeled up. But the blue
tape that remained from my last painting project solved this
dilemma nicely. As John and Sam watched, I stretched tape
across the kitchen, “walling” off the most dangerous spaces
and visibly separating them from the safe play region.
Sitting cross-legged on the floor, I explained the Blue
Line to them, repeatedly talking about cooking and kitchen
safety and unwanted trips to the ER—all couched in terms
such as “hot, hot” and “no, no.” Sam gave me a dubious
look (not the first she’s ever offered when one of my plans
is explained to her). John studiously crinkled his brows,
possibly wondering if my absurdity, like my dimples, is genetic.
When the chalkboard gets boring and the cupboard
isn’t interesting, the Blue Line saves me. It took a surprisingly
small number of “hot, hot” and “no, no” discussions
for remaining outside the Line during meal preparation to
become a habit.
Now I just need to give ‘the look’ or the ‘dramatic but
silent finger point’ to send an errant toddler scuttling back
across the line to safety. Generally there’s giggling, as it’s
become a contest to see who can cross the line in the tiniest
way. Thus far, John’s pinky finger extended just slightly beyond
the tape is the record holder. The look and the point,
like the giggling and scuttling, are preferable to burns and
panic and visits to the hospital.
There are pictures of John with his hand bandaged, and
he’s smiling in all of them. I smile now, too, as he and Sam
help me cook—their help generally causing every kitchen-based
activity to take three times longer. But the memory
of a tiny hand slapped onto a hot oven door, the memory
of a tiny scream, erases my smile still and makes my heart
pound—not because of what happened but because of
what could have happened. So many things other than a
little hand could have touched that oven door.
My kitchen is still a hub of activity, from auto races
on the linoleum to epic GI Joe versus Spiderman grudge
matches on the table. My kitchen is a safer place than ever
before, as John and Sam color with chalk, crawl in and out
of their cupboard, and stay safely behind the blue line. A
Run-of-the-Mill Safety Stuff
The Oven Door
If your oven is like mine, then the oven latch it already has (for the
self-cleaning cycle) cannot be used during normal baking. While
there are several varieties of latch available, none of them seem to
have an adhesive attachment that can long survive normal wearand-tear.
To keep my latch in place, I used Gorilla Glue. This latch
may now be a permanent part of the oven.
Knobs on the Stove
Generally, these slip over the peg on which the temperature control
knobs for the stovetop rotate. They snap shut and can’t be opened by
little hands. But these same little hands can pull the entire apparatus
off the stove, knob and cover combined. Use these until something
better comes along. Then stop using them.
Drawer & Cupboard Latches
While there are many varieties of latches to hold drawers and
cupboard doors shut, all of them are of a kind: one piece that
connects to the wooden frame, another which connects to the door
or drawer. Pull on the door/drawer and the latch engages; pull just
a little and then reach in to push down on the latch and the latch
doesn’t engage. This simple safety measure works well to keep
toddlers out of the knife drawer or cleanser storage cupboard. It
takes a good amount of finger strength to push down on the latch. Of
course, this means that elderly visitors, like my wife’s grandparents,
are also barred from grabbing a knife or a bottle of Windex.
First Aid Kit
Burns and cuts. These are the likely kitchen injuries, and the smaller,
less severe of them can be handled with a bit of disinfectant cream,
some kind of covering, and a kiss. Daddy kisses, however, are 27%
less effective than Mommy kisses.
Vigilance
No latch or line on the floor substitutes for vigilance and good
judgment. Use the burners on the back of the stove instead of always
using the front. Don’t run the TV or music if it means you’ll pay less
attention to the children. “Accidents happen,” John often tells me
when we discuss potty training issues. And accidents do happen, but
some accidents can be avoided.
February 2018 29

It’s cold
and flu
season:
are you
ready?
7 Fever Myths
by Steven J. Sainsbury, M.D.
Parental concerns about fevers are a
common reason for midnight visits to
the emergency room. With the bewildering
assortment of oral, rectal, skin and ear
thermometers, along with dozens of varieties
of fever-reducing medicines, a whole
fever-phobia has developed in our culture.
Fever should certainly be respected, but it
should not be feared. Lets’ dispel some of
the myths surrounding this symptom, and
hopefully your life will be a little less stressful
when your twin’s internal furnaces are working
overtime.
MytH #1: Fevers cause brain damage
This is perhaps the most commonly held fever
myth, and one that I have to discuss almost every
night in the ER with worried parents. Fevers that
are due to infection, even those reaching heights
of 105F, will not cause brain damage. It is true that
aches and pains can accompany high fevers, and
the fever can even produce some nonsensical or
babbling behavior, but high fevers will not permanently
injure your child. (Brain damage will occur
in body temperatures over 108F, which only results
from environmental conditions—a child left in a
closed car in hot weather, for example.)
MytH #2: Fever seizures are harmful
There is nothing quite so frightening as to observe
your precious child seizing in front of you. Fortunately,
fever seizures rarely last more than a few
minutes and do no permanent harm. Thankfully,
children who have had febrile seizures are not at
increased risk for learning disabilities, developmental
delays, or epilepsy.
MytH #3: all fevers need to be treated
Fever does not have to be treated. Why? Because
treating the fever will not help combat the underlying
disease process. However, because fevers
above 102F can sometimes cause discomfort, it
is reasonable to treat these fevers with acetaminophen
or ibuprofen liquid. A few words of caution:
It is not necessary to soak or sponge your
child with cold-water baths---this only reduces the
fever for a few minutes. And never use rubbing
alcohol to cool your feverish child. Alcohol is toxic
to infants, and will be absorbed through the skin.
30 TWINS Magazine A www.twinsmagazine.com

MytH #4: Without treatment, fevers
will just keep getting higher
Our brains have a wonderful internal thermostat
that will stop a fever from getting higher thatn
105-106F—whether you treat the fever or not.
MytH #5: With treatment, fevers
should return to normal
Aggressive fever treatment may not always
work. It may only lower the fever a degree or
two, or may only keep the temperature down
for an hour or two. Knowing this, be careful not
to get frustrated and over-treat a feverish child,
risking an overdose. Remember: the fever is not
the real problem.
MytH #6: the higher the fever, the
more dangerous the illness
This can be a dangerous myth. A child can be
quite ill, with a serious infection like pneumonia
or meningitis, and yet have a low-grade fever or
no fever at all. Conversely, benign viral infections,
that do no harm, can cause high fevers
that are unresponsive to fever-lowering medicines.
How your child appears (does he look
sick?) is far more important than how high his
fever may be.
MytH #7: any temperature higher
than 98.6 is considered a fever
A normal person’s temperature changes
throughout the day. Furthermore, the range of
“normal” temperatures can vary several degrees.
Most pediatricians define a fever as any rectal
temperature above 100.5F. In summary, fever
is simply a warning sign that an infection may
be present. Think of it like a subtle grinding
sound that suddenly appears from your car’s
engine. Upon hearing such a noise, would you
wrap your engine in soundproofing material
and start wearing earplugs so that you could no
longer hear the grinding? Or would you have a
mechanic investigate its source? Likewise, relax
about the heat, while you begin a search for the
flame. A
sooThIng coMMon sore
ThroaT roUgh sPoTs
Don’t some people become carriers of strep?
Yes, they can. Carriers are those people who have strep
bacteria in their throats but have no symptoms of the
disease. However, they may be a source of infection
in other family members. If a carrier state is detected,
treatment with a single course of antibiotics is recommended.
Remember, however, that most carriers have
no symptoms or complications, and become culture-negative
after a few weeks. If strep keeps recurring
in different family members, your physician may elect to
treat the entire family at the same time, hopefully eradicating
the bug from the household at least for a while.
What if my child is allergic to penicillin?
Other antibiotics that are effective against strep include
ampicillin, amoxicillin and crythromycin.
Can’t viruses cause complications also?
Yes, they can, but the complications are very uncommon
and rarely dangerous.
What is the cause of laryngitis?
Laryngitis is almost always due to the same viruses that
cause sore throats. The inflammation tends to travel
downward from the throat to the vocal cords. Hoarseness
is the result. As many of us know, laryngitis is
often painless, and like most viral infections goes away
without treatment.
If most sore throats are due to viruses, why
do they get better with penicillin?
They aren’t getting better because of the penicillin.
Study after study has shown that antibiotics have no
effect on the speed in which the infection resolves.
Besides the complications of strep, are there
any other dangerous complications of sore
throats?
Absolutely, many types of bacteria can cause sore
throats, and complications with each can occur. Probably
the most dangerous is an infection called epiglottitis.
In this illness, the flap of tissue that lies deep in
the throat becomes inflamed and swollen, blocking
the airway. This is a true emergency, characterized by
a child who has a sore throat, fever, often refuses to
swallow even her own saliva, and can be seen learning
forward to breathe. Should you have even the slightest
suspicion of this problem, seek immediate care. A
February 2018 31

Are your twins
active enough?
5 Parenting Tips To Help
Them Get More Exercise
I
dream about the idea of parenting in a world
where streets are safe and parents can let their
children run freely through the neighborhood,
their bodies naturally challenged with the exercise
of play. Instead today, before the slam of the car
door fades and the backpack drops on the floor, the
TV is switched on and the last few hours of daylight
disappear in a haze of video games and over processed
snack foods.
Even the concerned, well-meaning parent can
often stand helpless, wondering how to compete
against marketing genius and instant gratification.
Exercise and carrot sticks have a hard time competing
with Xboxes, Netflix and potato chips.
The proof is all around us. According to the
Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, the
health of too many North Americans is in danger
because of unhealthy lifestyles.
The latest data from the National Center for
Health Statistics show that 30 percent of U.S. adults
20 years of age and older - over 60 million people
- are obese. The CDC reports the percentage of
by Aria Gunman
young people who are overweight has more than
tripled since 1980.
But my twins aren’t obese - why should I be
concerned?
Your twins are normal, right? You are parenting
just fine. But in a world where walking is limited,
school P.E. programs are being cut, and cars, elevators
and buses eliminate our chance to exercise
naturally, we need to make a concerted effort to
make physical activity part of our day and our
children’s days.
Despite all the benefits of being
physically active, a worrying amount of
Americans are sedentary. Inactive
children are more likely to
become inactive adults,
so as parents how
can we get our
kids moving?
32 TWINS Magazine A www.twinsmagazine.com

The American Heart Association recommends
that children and adolescents participate in at least
60 minutes of moderate to vigorous physical activity
every day. The great news is exercise comes in
many forms and can be a lot of fun! With a little creativity
you can easily add some fun physical activity
into your parenting style.
1. Lead the
way
You need to set
a good example.
Kids, especially
younger
children, naturally
follow
their parents.
So make sure you
are looking after
your own health
and making
physical activity
a priority in your
life.
2. Do it together
In today’s overscheduled
world, we need
to make sure we are
spending quality
time with our
children. What
better way
than to be active
together.
Since kids can’t
be alone
roaming the neighborhood, parents need to play
with them.
3. Make it fun
Put on some music and dance. Play tag. Roller
blade. Basically just play. Provide them with toys
and equipment that encourage them to be active
while having fun.
Bikes, scooters, hockey sticks and baseball bats
will get your kids moving and active. For preschool
children, ride on toys that get them exercising like
pedal cars, big wheels and tricycles are always a
great parenting decision.
4. Cheer them on
Create positive reinforcements with encouragement
and support. Help them find sports and
activities that build their self-esteem. Attend their
sporting events and let them know you are their
biggest fan whether they win or lose.
5. Turn it off
Of course, we need to limit the time our kids watch
TV and play video games. But make sure you do
it in a positive way. If they are angry that you just
turned off their favorite show, they might not be
too excited about going out rollerblading with you.
Allow screen time during designated hours, preferably
after homework is done and when physical
activity is finished, like in the evening or on Saturday
morning when tired parents might need to
catch a few extra minutes of sleep.
Adding more physical activity into your family’s
routine will help you all feel better and get you
having more fun together. Most importantly, as
you model a healthy lifestyle you will help instill in
your children lifelong habits and healthy attitudes
toward exercise and physical activity. A
February 2018 33

3
2
1
6
4
5
7
8
34
9
10
11

DOUBLETAKES
12
13
14
17
15
16
18
1. Isabel & Arturo
2. Harper & Hendrix
3. Jack & Isla
4. Evan & Jacob
5. Melina & Giuliana
6. Sierra & Parker
7. Arlie & King
8. Maizie & Maximus
11. Addison & Austin
12. Mason & Wilson
13. Enya & Cyra
14. Prayan & Prayas
15. Lila & Archier
16. Jocy & Gise
17. Ethan & Austin
18. Gianna & James
19
20
9. Deanna & Jaclynn
10. Austin & Jackson
19. Rylynn & Hannah
20. Declan & Drake
35

22
21
23
26
24
25
27 28
30
29
31
36

DOUBLETAKES
32
33
34
35
36
37
38
21. Sawyer & Sophie
22. Cooper & Conner
23. Paige & Payton
24. Levi & Lachlan
25. Abby & Elena
26. Kirsten & Leanna
27. Kendall & Kenya
28. Averly & Gracyn
31. Malachi & Micah
32. Dario & Dante
33. Remi & Rob
34. Ava & Yuna
35. Oliver & Joseph
36. Harper & Dean
37. Barnie & Bertie
38. Kiara & Valerie
39
40
29. Mia & Ella
30. Miguel & Federico
39. Katherine & Sarah
40. Adrienne & Isabella
37

42
41
43
46
44
45
47
48
38
49
50
51

52
DOUBLETAKES
53
54
55
56
57
58
41. Dylan & Dakota
42. Javion & Dontrell
43. Alexandre & Grace
44. Lily & Salley
45. Lira & Ledion
46. Leonardo & Luna
47. Chad & Caroline
48. Eloise & Madeline
51. Anthony & Andrew
52. Madison & Samantha
53. Smith & Malcolm
54. Jordan & Alex
55. Mercedes & Matteo
56. Lillie & Paizley
57. Dylan & Ean
58. Henry & James
59
60
49. Cherubim & Micah
50. Alice & Wyatt
59. Jessica & Jennifer
60. Ellia & Sunday
39

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