The Contemporary Man Magazine june 2018

The Contemporary Man: The Magazine /June 2018 

Volume 1.Issue 1 1


AS I LAY DYING TEASE FIRST NEW MUSIC 28 

NEW RELEASES FROM GHOST, KATAKLYSUM, AND MORE OUT TODAY - 

6/1 29 

Alien Weaponry – Tū 29 

Ghost – Prequelle 30 

Gruesome – Twisted Prayers30 

Kataklysm – Meditations 31 

Nervosa – Downfall Of Mankind 31 

Witchskull – Coven's Will 32 

AI ETHICS COUNCIL IN SINGAPORE WILL GIVE SMART ADVICE 77 

TEASES 28-HOUR LAPTOP BATTERY LIFE. HERE'S WHAT YOU NEED TO 

KNOW 79 

MEN’S SUMMER FASHION – LATEST TRENDS IN 2018 121 

Men’s Summer Style Essentials 121 

The Shorts 121 

Shorts Buyer’s Guide 123 

The Shirts 124 

Shirts Buyer’s Guide 126 

The Pants 127 

Pants Buyer’s Guide 128 

The Shoes 128 

Shoes Buyer’s Guide 129 

Outerwear and Accessories 129 

BEST MEN’S COLOGNES (JUNE. 2018) 132 

THE 7 BEST EYE CREAMS IN 2018 

145 

Yes To Blueberries Age Refresh Eye Firming Treatment 146 

Tarte Maracuja C-Brighter Eye Treatment 147 

Kate Somerville Age Arrest Eye Cream 148 

Kiehl’s Creamy Eye Treatment with Avocado 149 

Avon Anew Clinical Thermafirm 150 

Farmacy Dew It All Total Eye Cream with Echinacea GreenEnvy 151 

Clinique Repair Anti-Gravity Eye Cream 152 

THE BEST FACIAL MOISTURIZERS (2018) 153 

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Moisturizers For Dry Skin 154 

Moisturizers For Normal Skin 155 

Moisturizers For Sensitive Skin 156 

Moisturizers For Oily Skin 157 

Moisturizers For Combination Skin 158 

Moisturizers For Acne Prone Skin 159 

THE SECRET TO CURING CHRONIC 160 

CHAPPED LIPS 160 

SKINCARE GUIDE FOR MEN WITH 162 

SENSITIVE SKIN 162 

Here’s 3 steps to get rid of neck bumps forever: 163 

GUIDE TO STOP (EXCESSIVE) 165 

ARMPIT SWEAT 165 

The Best Antiperspirants For Underarm Sweat 166 

1. Certain-Dri 166 

2. SweatBlock 167 

3. ZeroSweat 167 

4. Odaban 168 

Sweat Proof Undershirts 168 

The Thompson Tee Sweat Proof Undershirt 169 

See a Doctor 169 

RELATIONSHIP ADVICE 195 

Growing Up is Not Bad 205 

No One Owes You Anything 206 

Spend More Time with Men, Not Boys 206 

Find Meaningful Purpose 207 

Do Not Allow Our Children to be Raised by Women Exclusively 207 

Boys Need to be Challenged 207 

There Must be Consequences 208 

SINGLE DADS 215 

Volume 1.Issue 1 3


PREPARING SONS FOR MANHOOD AS A SINGLE DAD 215 

Finding His Identity 215 

If Mom Is Not Present 215 

Preparing Him For The Battle Ahead 216 

10 THINGS TO WRITE A LETTER TO YOUR DAUGHTER 217 

1. “I love you from the bottom of my heart.” 217 

2. “I believe in you.” 217 

3. “I think you’re beautiful.” 217 

4. “You make me proud in so many ways.” 218 

5. “I want you to know what my treasures are.” 218 

6. “Let me tell you about the day you were born.” 218 

7. “Don’t ever settle for second best.” 218 

8. “Sometimes my love makes me afraid.” 219 

9. “You can always come to me—no matter what—and I will help you figure things out.” 219 

10. “Now I want you to listen to my heart.” 219 

10 PERFECT DADDY-DAUGHTER DATE IDEAS 219 

1. Do Her Favorite Thing. 220 

2. Go on a Picnic. 220 

3. Paint Pottery. 220 

4. Go to a Carnival/Festival. 220 

5. See a Show. 220 

6. Take Her Shopping. 220 

7. Try Geo-caching. 221 

8. Have a Dinner Date. 221 

9. Host a Ball at Home or Go to a Formal Dance Class. 221 

10. Have a Photo Scavenger Hunt. 221 

Volume 1.Issue 1 4


10 THINGS I HOPE MY CHILDREN REMEMBER ABOUT ME AS A FATHER 

222 

1. He knew how to have fun. 222 

2. He gave us lots of physical affection. 222 

3. He spent time with us. 222 

4. He knew how to be both our father and daddy. 222 

5. He was patient and kind. 223 

6. He was helpful. 223 

7. He was in love with our mother. 223 

8. He loved serving others. 223 

9. He loved me unconditionally. 223 

10. He loved God. 223 

TEACH YOUR CHILDREN TO MAKE WISE DECISIONS 224 

1. Let them make mistakes 224 

2. Expose them to the ‘real world’ 224 

3. Teach your child to know herself 225 

4. Learn your child’s interests 225 

5. Talk to your child 225 

6. Get involved 225 

7. Money, money, money 225 

8. Pile on the PRAISE 226 

9. The friends we keep 226 

10. Lead by example 226 

The best lessons in life are caught, not taught, by a child’s parents. 226 

Volume 1.Issue 1 5


Editorial: 

Editor-in-Chief Travis S. Miller 

Senior Editor Bobby Manalo 

Writer Tracy Holt 

Writer Temperance Acquistapace 

Writer Paul Rodriguez 

Legal Notice 

This is the boring, legal stuff the my lawyers has asked me to include! Please respect our material by 

not putting it out there on the internet. Thank you. we appreciate it. 

"This is Copyright © 2015-2025 with all rights reserved to Contemporary Solutions, Inc.. It is illegal to 

copy, distribute, or create derivative works from this book in whole or in part, or to contribute to the 

copying, distribution, or creating of any derivative works. You understand that this Magazine 

contains an expression of opinions. The information provided should only be used for personal 

entertainment purposes. You are solely responsible for the use of the ideas, concepts, and content 

and hold Contemporary Solutions, Inc. and all members and affiliates harmless in any event or 

Volume 1.Issue 1 6


claim. You may “NOT” print a copy of this magazine for any other personal use. However, it is illegal 

to print this Magazine, or to sells distributes it in any way." 

The Contemporary Man THE MISSION: 

The Contemporary Man THE MISSION: is Hoping to become one of the world's most 

popular men's lifestyle magazine. includes monthly features on subjects such as fashion, 

fitness, dating, money and entertainment. 

Tips from style on choosing a new suit to workout advice on modernizing tired fitness 

routines complement editorial features on relationships, finance and entertainment. 

It is my life’s mission to transform the lives of MEN through my programs and books as 

well through my information online. 

I want to see you succeed. Words such as honor, loyalty, trust, integrity, and courage 

are words that have powerful meanings, but they are only words unless you live by 

them. 

As I talk with other men, I can see that there is a massive need for learning how to be a 

better father. But I’ve also seen a need for reliable and honorable men outside of the 

home. Guys, we’re losing the meaning of manhood. 

We’ve gone away from being reliable, rugged, independent, and tough to a collection of 

wimpy, dependent, whiners. Something has got to be done! “Some say there is no such 

thing as an Alpha made Man’s man. 

That nothing can be accomplished in life without the help of others. That a man cannot 

reach his goals without assistance. 

And while that may be true, these people are not the source or the cause of his success. 

A man becomes an Alpha made the moment he decides to shape his world, rather than 

be formed by it. It is a spark… A decision… An internal will that can never be given by 

another and that can never be purchased or borrowed. 

At that moment, he becomes the sole architect and artist of his life - an Alpha made 

Man’s man, where the rest of the world serves as the hammer and chisel he wields in 

order to shape it to his desire. The Contemporary Man was created for men who want to 

achieve greatness. 

Who wants to leave their mark on the world, and create a legacy of honor, integrity, and 

achievement in every aspect of their lives.” 

-Travis S. Miller 

Editor-in-Chief/Founder of the Contemporary Man. 

Volume 1.Issue 1 7


T’s Thoughts: 

I was in a conversation with my friend, and he asked me: 

“How do you feel about people who say “yep?” 

After about a second I said, “I hate it, it’s so indecisive.” 

Which then turned into a conversation about the many different variations of saying 

“yes.” I feel that “yes” is the OG (Original Gangster for everyone else that’s not my five 

friends who use “OG”) of affirming something. Since the meaning of “yes,” we’ve gotten 

grunts, 

yuups, head nods, fist pounds, looks, and about thirty other things to show that we 

mean, “yes.” 

When dealing with someone over email or text message, I think that the most commonly 

used terms of “yes” are “yep” and “yup.” or yeah. Ya. 

The thing about not saying “yes” is that it can mean so much. 

The words “yup” and “yep” and "Yea" or "YA" can seem so incredibly passive that it 

means there is probably some weight behind using them. Here is a quick little break 

down that I may have spent way too much time thinking about- 

Using “Yes” – 

Is there a better word? As I mentioned above, it’s the OG of affirming a situation. It gives 

comfort. I feel that if someone uses “yes” it’s a binding contract or at least should be 

viewed as one. When you get a “yes” you know what the person means. 

Using “Yup” – 

“Yup” is tricky. Imagine sending this email: 

Hey man, I’m thinking about getting engaged, do you like my girlfriend? 

Then receiving: 

Yup. 

That doesn’t exactly seem too reassuring. I have no idea why you’d email that to 

someone, but you get the point, right? But on the flip side “yup” is such a bro term. 

Hey man, I’m going to get some beers for the game, you want any? 

Yup! 

I can hear the person responding with “yup” being a doofus who is already drunk. “Yup” 

is very dependent on context, to be honest, but it’s no “yes” and “yes” doesn’t rely on 

context, its definitive. 

Volume 1.Issue 1 8


Using “Yep” or Yeah, or YA – 

The most passive of the bunch. I hate using and also receiving a “yep” because I feel 

like I always envision the person who is writing it. The only time I ever consciously have 

used “yep” it’s when I agree with something, but I’m not happy about it, so I'm passive, 

and I want that person to know I’m not satisfied. 

Using “yep” is saying, “I’m so annoyed with you.” Also, the word “yep” drastically 

changes depending on context and the relationship you have with someone. 

Imagine if you’re dating someone and you send this: 

Would you like to grab some 

food tonight? 

And you receive: 

Yep. Yeah, or YA 

That response is saying that the other person has nothing better to do so they’ll get 

dinner with you. 

OR: 

Did you finish the presentation? 

Yep. Yeah, or YA 

That’s a “fuck you stop asking me about my work and focus on yourself” response. 

Yes. Yup. Yep. Yeah, or YA And I’m currently not taking into consideration the voice to 

voice interaction when you can hear people say these different words, once you enter 

that world it’s a whole new monster. To avoid any confusion, we need to stick with the 

OG. 

When asked a question, don’t confuse people… just go yes. 

Side note to all of this: If you’re the type of person who to people with a “Y” then that’s a 

whole new ball of wax. 

That means you’re either A) Lazy B) Have an old phone and don’t want to type out the 

words. C) Not a fan of technology and could give a shit D) You receive so many 

messages in a day that you can’t stand two other letters. Or E) You think you’re so 

incredibly talented. 

Some of those reasons stated in the side note are understandable but try to stick with 

yes for the sake of humanity. 

-Travis 

Volume 1.Issue 1 9


Volume 1.Issue 1 10


1988 (MCMLXXXVIII) was a leap year starting on Friday of the Gregorian calendar, the 

1988th year of the Common Era (CE) and Anno Domini (AD) designations, the 988th 

year of the 2nd millennium, the 88th year of the 20th century, and the 9th year of the 

1980s decade. 

In the 20th century, the year 1988 has the most Roman numeral digits (11). 

1988 was a crucial year in the early history of the Internet—it was the year of the first 

well-known computer virus, the 1988 Internet worm. The first permanent intercontinental 

Internet link was made between the United States (NSFNET) and Europe (Nordunet) as 

well as the first Internet-based chat protocol, Internet Relay Chat.[1] The concept of the 

World Wide Web was first discussed at CERN in 1988.[2] 

The Soviet Union began its major restructuring towards a mixed economy at the 

beginning of 1988 and began its gradual collapse. The Iron Curtain began to disintegrate 

in 1988 as Hungary began allowing freer travel to the West.[3] The first extrasolar planet, 

Gamma Cephei Ab (confirmed in 2002) was detected this year and the World Health 

Organization began its mission to eradicate polio. 

Jun 1 "Les Miserables" opens at Shubert Theatre, LA 

Jun 1 "Morton Downey Jr Show" debuts in TV syndication 

Jun 1 Train crash kills two in Zeeland, Netherlands 

Jun 2 61st National Spell Bee: Rageshree Ramachandran wins spelling elegiacal 

Jun 2 Consumer Reports calls for a ban on the Suzuki Samurai automobile 

Film release premierFilm Premier 

Volume 1.Issue 1 11


Jun 3 "Big" film directed by Penny Marshall, starring Tom Hanks premieres in US 

Jun 3 Margo Adams sues Red Sox 3rd baseman Wade Boggs for palimony 

Jun 4 "Cabaret" closes at Imperial Theater NYC after 262 performances 

Jun 4 42nd Tony Awards: "M Butterfly" and "Phantom of the Opera" win 

Jun 4 Longest game in Baltimore Memorial Stadium (5:46) 14 inn (beat NY 7-6) 

Sports record brokenBaseball Record 

Jun 4 Rickey Henderson steals 2 bases for record 249 as a NY Yankee 

Jun 5 1st Children's Miracle Network Telethon raises $590,000 

Jun 5 Kay Cottee sails into Sydney as 1st woman to circle globe alone 

Jun 5 Laura Davies wins LPGA Jamie Farr Toledo Golf Classic 

Jun 5 Longest champagne cork flight is 177'9 in NY 

Jun 5 Russian orthodox church celebrates it's 1,000th anniversary 

Sport awardTennis Open 

Jun 5 87th Men's French Open: Mats Wilander beats Henri Leconte (7-5, 6-2, 6-1) 

Jun 5 87th Women's French Open: Steffi Graf beats Natalia Zvereva (6-0, 6-0) 

Jun 6 22nd Music City News Country Awards: Randy Travis & Statler Brothers 

Jun 6 3 giant turtles found in Bronx sewage plant 

Jun 6 George H. W. Bush makes campaign promise to support reparations for WW II to 

Japanese-American internees (promise broken, May 1989) 

Jun 7 Aluminum contaminates Cornwall's water supply 

Jun 8 Nippon Airways announces that painting eyeballs on Jets cut bird collisions by 

20% 

Jun 9 "Bloodsport (1987)" premieres in Germany 

Volume 1.Issue 1 12


Jun 9 US Attorney General Edwin Meese orders Joseph Doherty deported to UK 

Jun 10 Greatest number of participants (31,678) on a bicycle tour (London) 

Jun 11 "Everything Your Heart Desires" by Daryl Hall & John Oates peaks at #3 

Jun 11 "Rooty Toot Toot" by John Cougar Mellencamp peaks at #61 

Event of interest 

Jun 11 "We All Sleep Alone" by Cher peaks at #14 

Jun 11 120th Belmont: Eddie Delahoussaye aboard Risen Star wins in 2:26.6 

Jun 11 25th Curtis Cup: British Isles, 11-7 

Jun 11 Freedomfest - Mandela addresses Wembley Stadium London 

Jun 11 Galina Chistyakova of USSR sets long jump woman's record (24"8½") 

Jun 11 Yanks' Rick Rhoden becomes 1st pitcher to DH (0 for 1 with an RBI) 

Jun 12 6th Seniors Players Golf Championship: Billy Casper 

Jun 12 Andy Hampton is 1st American to win Round of Italy 

Jun 12 Mei-Chi Cheng wins LPGA Rochester Golf International 

Jun 12 The Republic of Ireland beats England 1-0 at Euro88 thanks to a headed goal by 

Ray Houghton. This is Ireland's first competitive match at a major football tournament. 

Jun 13 45th time opposing pitchers hit HRs, Mark Davis (Padres)/Mike Krukow 

Jun 13 Boston Red Sox are 10 games back in AL, & go on to win AL East 

Jun 13 Fed jury finds Liggett liable in death of NJ woman of lung cancer 

Event of interestEvent of Interest 

Jun 13 George Harrison releases "This is Love" 

Singer-Songwriter George Harrison 

Jun 13 US Supreme Court refuses to hear Yonkers argument they aren't racist 

Jun 14 Woman sues Chuck Berry for $5,000,000, alleges he hit her 

Jun 14 "Guy" debut album by Guy is released 

Jun 15 NASA launches space vehicle S-213 

Jun 15 Turkish premier Özal meets Greek premier Papandreou in Athens 

Volume 1.Issue 1 13


Jun 16 Boston Red Sox Barrett steals home 

Jun 16 In Santa Barbara, CA, a team of 32 divers begin cycling underwater on a 

standard tricycle, to complete 116.66 mi in 75 hrs 20 mins 


Jun 17 Givens' Family reports Mike Tyson beats his wife Robin Givens 

Jun 17 Microsoft releases MS DOS 4.0 

Jun 17 Soyuz TM-5 launches 

Jun 17 Women sentenced to 90 years in 1st product tampering murder case 

Jun 18 Jeff Hamilton, hits 8,000th Dodger home run 

Jun 19 88th US Golf Open: Curtis Strange shoots a 278 at Country Club Mass 

Jun 19 Namphy takes control of Haitian government 

Jun 19 Shirley Furlong wins LPGA Lady Keystone Golf Open 

Jun 19 World's then largest sausage completed at 13 1/8 miles long 

Jun 19 32 divers finish cycling underwater on a standard tricycle, to complete 116.66 mi 

in 75 hrs 20 mins 

Jun 20 Coup in Haiti: Henri Namphy overthrows Leslie Manigat, general assembly 

dissolved 

Jun 20 NYC WABC-AM becomes flagship radio station of NJ Devils 

Jun 20 Price is Right model Janice Pennington is knocked out by a TV camera 

Jun 20 WABC officially becomes the NJ Devils new home radio 

Jun 20 Supreme Court upholds a law that made it illegal for private clubs to discriminate 

against women and minorities 

Jun 21 42nd NBA Championship: LA Lakers beat Detroit Pistons, 4 games to 3 

Jun 21 Many killed at demonstration against General Ne Win in Rangoon 

Jun 21 Rascals begin 1st tour in 20 years 

Jun 23 Charlotte Hornets & Miami Heat begin their NBA expansion draft 

Jun 23 Yanks manager Billy Martin's 5th term ends, Lou Pinella named manager 

Jun 24 Cleve pitcher Doug Jones sets record of 14 consecutive saves 

Volume 1.Issue 1 14


Jun 24 Red Sox begin AL record 23rd consecutive home win streak 

Jun 25 "Chess" closes at Imperial Theater NYC after 68 performances 

Jun 25 104°F highest temperature ever recorded in Cleveland in June 


Jun 25 Cal Ripken Jr plays in his 1,000th consecutive game 

Jun 25 Expos Pitcher Floyd Youmans suspended for 60 days due to drugs 

Jun 25 Iceland's President Vigdis Finnbogadóttir elected (90+%) 

Jun 25 Kristen Logan, 17, of Mississippi, crowned America's Junior Miss 

Jun 25 UEFA European Championship: Netherlands defeat Soviet Union 2-0 in Munich 

Jun 25 Roger Rabbit Cartoon Character debuts in "Who Framed Roger Rabbit?" 

Jun 26 Kathy Postlewait wins LPGA McDonald's Golf Championship 

Jun 27 Mike Tyson KOs Michael Spink in 91 seconds, in Atlantic City ($67m) 

Jun 27 Reds bat out of order against Padres in 1st inning 

Jun 28 Mike Tyson sues to break contract with manager Bill Cayton 

Jun 29 Emmy 15th Daytime Award presentation - Susan Lucci loses for 9th time 

Jun 30 "Sledge Hammer!" last aires on ABC-TV 

Jun 30 Brooklyn dedicates a bus depot honoring Jackie Gleason 

Jun 30 Chicago agrees to build a new stadium so White Sox won't move to Florida 

Jun 30 French archbishop Marcel Lefebvre is excommunicated by the Roman Catholic 

Church. 

Volume 1.Issue 1 15


Volume 1.Issue 1 16


1988's Top 20 charts 

UK (US) Title Artist 

1 With a little help from my friends/She's leaving home /Wet Wet Wet/Billy Bragg & Cara 

Tivey 

2 Got to be certain Kylie Minogue 

3 Doctorin' the tardis Timelords 

4 Somewhere in my heart Aztec Camera 

5 Voyage voyage Desireless 

6 Circle in the sand Belinda Carlisle 

7 I owe you nothing Bros 

8 My one temptation Mica Paris 

9 Wild world Maxi Priest 

10 Boys(Summertime love) Sabrina 

11 Perfect Fairground Attraction 

12 Check this out L.A.Mix 

13 I saw him standing there Tiffany 

14 Everyday is like Sunday Morrissey 

15 The king of rock 'n roll Prefab Sprout 

16 Chains of love Erasure 

17 Tribute(Right on) Pasadenas 

18 Give a little love Aswad 

19 The twist(Yo,twist) Fat Boys/Chubby Checker 

20 Love will save the day Whitney Houston 

Volume 1.Issue 1 17


1988 Metal/Hard Rock Releases 

Iron Maiden 

Seventh Son of a Seventh Son (1988) 

2 

3 

4 

5 

Metallica 

...And Justice for All (1988) 

Testament 

The New Order (1988) 

Cinderella 

Long Cold Winter (1988) 

Megadeth 

So Far, So Good... So What! (1988) 

6 

7 

8 

9 

10 

Queensrÿche 

Operation: Mind crime (1988) 

Crimson Glory 

Transcendence (1988) 

Slayer 

South of Heaven (1988) 

Helloween 

Keeper of the Seven Keys Part II (1988) 

Suicidal Tendencies 

How Will I Laugh Tomorrow When I Can't Even Smile Today 

(1988) 

Volume 1.Issue 1 18


11 

Living Colour 

Vivid (1988) 

12 

13 

14 

15 

16 

17 

18 

David Lee Roth 

Skyscraper (1988) 

Jane's Addiction 

Nothing's Shocking (1988) 

Dare 

Out of the Silence (1988) 

L.A. Guns 

L.A. Guns (1988) 

Death 

Leprosy (1988) 

Running Wild 

Port Royal (1988) 

Survivor 

Too Hot to Sleep (1988) 

19 

20 

21 

Alien 

Alien (1988) 

Stage Dolls 

Stage Dolls (1988) 

King Diamond 

"Them" (1988) 

Volume 1.Issue 1 19


22 

23 

24 

25 

26 

27 

28 

29 

30 

31 

32 

33 

Manowar 

Kings of Metal (1988) 

Van Halen 

OU812 (1988) 

Anthrax 

State of Euphoria (1988) 

Overkill 

Under the Influence (1988) 

Bon Jovi 

New Jersey (1988) 

Europe 

Out of This World (1988) 

Ozzy Osborne 

No Rest for the Wicked (1988) 

House of Lords 

House of Lords (1988) 

Poison 

Open Up and Say... Ahh! (1988) 

Guns n' Roses 

G N' R Lies (1988) 

Riot 

ThunderSteel (1988) 

Magnum 

Wings of Heaven (1988) 

Volume 1.Issue 1 20


34 

35 

36 

37 

38 

39 

40 

41 

42 

43 

44 

45 

Robert Plant 

Now and Zen (1988) 

Lillian Axe 

Lillian Axe (1988) 

Prophet 

Cycle of the Moon (1988) 

Blind Guardian 

Battalions of Fear (1988) 

Kix 

Blow My Fuse (1988) 

Scorpions 

Savage Amusement (1988) 

Sword 

Sweet Dreams (1988) 

Bathory 

Blood Fire Death (1988) 

Judas Priest 

Ram It Down (1988) 

Vio-Lence 

Eternal Nightmare (1988) 

Helstar 

A Distant Thunder (1988) 

Nuclear Assault 

Survive (1988) 

Volume 1.Issue 1 21


46 

47 

48 

49 

50 

Hurricane 

Over the Edge (1988) 

Brocas Helm 

Black Death (1988) 

Skagarack 

Hungry for a Game (1988) 

Danzig 

Danzig (1988) 

King's X 

Out of the Silent Planet (1988) 

Volume 1.Issue 1 22


AS I LAY DYING Tease First New Music 

As I Lay Dying frontman Tim 

Lambesis was released from 

prison in early 2017. 

Lambesis was sentenced to six years imprisonment in May 2014 on a felony charge of 

solicitation of murder after attempting to hire a hitman to kill his then-wife. He served 

about two and a half years and was released right at the end of 2016, and has since 

remarried. We covered this story exhaustively in 2013 and 2014. 

Lambesis has since published a lengthy apology regarding what he had done, 

apologizing to his ex-wife, children and fans. "Words cannot begin to express how 

deeply sorry I am for the hurt that I have caused," the letter began. 

A few months after it was revealed Lambesis was out of prison, he began teasing a 

potential comeback for As I Lay Dying. More reports surfaced that he was indeed 

working with an all-new lineup of musicians to forge a comeback, though the report did 

not cite any specific names of who Lambesis was (or is) allegedly working with. These 

have all been rumors and pretty much pure conjecture up until now. 

As I Lay Dying has published 45 seconds of brand new music and what looks like the 

tease to a music video on their Facebook page, as well as a mysterious profile picture, 

potentially a teaser of the cover art. The video is very careful not to show anyone's face. 

Volume 1.Issue 1 23


New Releases From GHOST, KATAKLYSUM, and More Out Today - 6/1 

This edition includes angry teens, death metal madness, the clergy, and more! To the 

metals… 

Alien Weaponry – Tū 

Genre: Heavy metal/thrash 

Origin: Waipu, New Zealand 

Label: Napalm Records 

The de Jong brothers are angry kids. This band's debut finds a nice medium ground 

between thrash and groove meta and thrives there. Lyrically it can be a little cringe 

worthy, but they're lyrics literally written by teenagers. So there's room to grow. 

Volume 1.Issue 1 24


Ghost – Prequelle 

Genre: Heavy metal 

Origin: Linköping, Sweden 

Label: Loma Vista 

One of modern metal's most divisive bands continues to divide, especially in the Metal 

Injection offices (aka a group chat). Like all Ghost records, the melodies and riffs will 

grab onto your brain and never let go. This might be the band's most derivative work as 

it pulls from 70's rock more than ever, and for some that might not be the best thing. This 

might be my favorite Ghost thing so far, but I'll need to let it sit for a bit. 

Gruesome – Twisted Prayers 

Genre: Death metal 

Origin: Arroyo Grande, California/Miami, Florida 

Label: Relapse 

Twisted Prayers is death metal by numbers in the best way. Cover art with dead people 

on it? Check. Lyrics mocking religion? Check. No bullshit death metal? Check. 

Volume 1.Issue 1 25


Kataklysm – Meditations 

Genre: Melodic death metal 

Origin: Montreal, Quebec 

Label: Nuclear Blast 

This has been a pretty good year for melodic death metal. Earlier this year At The Gates 

dropped a new record, and now Kataklysm reared it's ugly head once again. All you 

need now is some new Amon Amarth (and probably another band I'm failing to 

remember), and melo-death fans will be happier than pigs in shit. 

Nervosa – Downfall Of Mankind 

Genre: Thrash/death metal 

Origin: São Paulo, Brazil 

Label: Napalm 

Earlier I called Gruesome no bullshit death metal, well Nervosa are somehow even less 

bullshit, but faster. This is chaotic, swift, thrashy death metal, and it's wonderful. 

Volume 1.Issue 1 26


Witchskull 

Genre: Stoner/heavy 

Origin: Canberra, 

Label: Rise Above 

I'm ending this rather 

riffs. Witchskull are 

everything, driving 

imagery. Frankly, 

of 

– Coven's Will 

metal 

Australia 

eclectic week with 

fuzz pedals on 

rhythms, and spooky 

they're an ideal band 

Also dropping today… 

Casket Feeder – Scalps (Hibernacula Records) – Hardcore/death metal 

Convictions – Hope For The Broken (InVogue) – Metalcore 

Human Cull – Revenant (WOOAAARGH) – Grindcore 

The Konsortium – Rogaland (Agonia Records) – Thrash/black metal 

Modern Maps – Hope You're Happy (Rise) – Rock 

Powerflo – Bring That Shit Back! (N/A) – Rap metal 

Slomatics/Conan – Split (Black Bow Records) – Stoner/doom 

Worshipper – Mirage Daze EP (Tee Pee) – Heavy metal 

Volume 1.Issue 1 27


Volume 1.Issue 1 28


While Netflix remains far and away the most popular streaming subscription service out 

there, it's fair to say that their selection of movies isn't quite what it once was. Netflix is 

opting more and more to focus on their own original content, and while much of that 

content is good, it doesn't do much for those looking to take in a great movie that Netflix 

didn't produce. 

Reduction in library size aside, Netflix still plays host to some truly great films, ranging all 

the way from relatively recent superhero adventures to bonafide Oscar-winning classic 

dramas. Here are the 25 best films on Netflix that you can watch right now. 

Before the list proper, there are some notes to be made. First, Netflix offers a different 

selection in every country it services, and this list focuses solely on films available to 

U.S. subscribers. That said, those outside the U.S. are encouraged to still check their 

country's line-up, as some of these picks may also be available to them. Secondly, these 

25 films are available to stream as of this writing. If and when included titles are removed 

from Netflix, this list will be updated with new selections. 

25. Captain America: Civil War 

Volume 1.Issue 1 29


The second MCU film to be directed by Avengers: Infinity War helmers Joe and Anthony 

Russo, Captain America: Civil War pits Iron Man's (Robert Downey Jr.) pro-government 

oversight of superheroes side against Captain America's (Chris Evans) opposing side. 

Holding an impressive 91% score on Rotten Tomatoes, Civil War is one of the most 

beloved movies in the MCU lineage to date, and also served to introduce Spider-Man 

(Tom Holland) and Black Panther (Chadwick Boseman) into the mix prior to their 

respective solo films. 

24. The Departed 

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A remake of the 2002 Hong King film Infernal Affairs, The Departed is probably best 

known for being the film that finally won legendary director Martin Scorsese his first 

Oscar for Best Director. The complex, arresting crime drama also picked up the Oscars 

for Best Picture and Best Adapted Screenplay. Leonardo DiCaprio and Matt Damon star 

as a cop planted within the mob and a criminal planted within the police, respectively. 

Jack Nicholson also commands the screen as brutal crime boss Frank Costello. 

23. The Truman Show 

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While it's now well-established that comedy icon Jim Carrey can also easily pull off good 

dramatic acting when called upon to do so, the first film to really open the eyes of the 

masses to Carrey's then-untapped ability was 1998's The Truman Show. Directed by 

Peter Weir and rated 94% on RT, The Truman Show in many ways predicted the rise of 

reality TV culture, featuring a titular lead character whose life had been unknowingly (to 

him) broadcast to the masses as a form of entertainment. 

22. Rogue One: A Star Wars Story 

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Modern blockbuster cinema arguably wouldn't even exist without the Star Wars 

franchise, and the only entry in that saga that Netflix currently streams is director Gareth 

Edwards' Rogue One: A Star Wars Story. Despite a tumultuous production process, this 

Felicity Jones-fronted prequel impressed many, earning an 85% rating on Rotten 

Tomatoes, and proving that this new line of standalone Star Wars movies would be 

worth watching. 

21. Lethal Weapon 

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Directed by 80s mainstay Richard Donner, 1987's Lethal Weapon still stands as one of 

the quintessential examples of how to do a "buddy cop' action movie right (83% on RT). 

Mel Gibson stars as Martin Riggs, a suicidal sergeant with a short fuse and nothing to 

lose. Riggs gets partnered up with by the book lawman Roger Murtaugh (Danny Glover), 

leading to a slowly blossoming friendship, and one of film's most beloved duos. Lethal 

Weapon would spawn three successful sequels, and a currently airing TV reboot on 

FOX. 

20. The Descent 

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Directed by Neil Marshall, 2005's The Descent (85% on RT) is one of the most intense 

horror experiences in recent memory, and is sure to leave viewers on the edge of their 

seat. The Descent follows a group of female friends - including lead Sarah (Shauna 

Macdonald) - who seek adventure by heading into an unmapped cave system, only to 

fall prey to both horrifying subterranean monsters and their own rapidly crumbling 

personal relationships. 

19. Seven 

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One of the most respected crime thrillers of the 90s, Seven has style to spare, and was 

one of the films to first establish David Fincher as a director be reckoned with. Seven 

stars Brad Pitt as brash young detective David Mills, who partners up with soon to retire 

detective William Somerset (Morgan Freeman) in order to try and catch a serial killer 

who bases his murders on the seven deadly sins. Holding an 80% score on Rotten 

Tomatoes and hauling in over $300 million at the box office on a $33 million budget, 

Seven was both a critical and commercial smash. 

18. Dead Poets Society 

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Director Peter Weir makes his second appearance on this list with 1989's Dead Poets 

Society, a film likely to have inspired many people to become teachers. The late, great 

Robin Williams stars as maverick instructor John Keating, the type of teacher most 

people only ever wish they had. Some of Keating's students include future notables 

Ethan Hawke, Robert Sean Leonard, and Josh Charles. An Oscar-winner for Best 

Original Screenplay (written by Tom Schulman), Dead Poets Society holds an 86% 

score on RT. 

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17. Boogie Nights 

The film that launched acclaimed director Paul Thomas Anderson to the Hollywood A- 

list, Boogie Nights is set within the 1970s porn industry, and stars Mark Wahlberg as 

lead character Dirk Diggler. Sporting a 93% score on RT, Boogie Nights also made 

former rapper Wahlberg a major player in the acting world, and rejuvenated the flagging 

career of Burt Reynolds. The absolutely star-studded cast also includes Heather 

Graham, Julianne Moore, Philip Seymour Hoffman, Don Cheadle, John C. Reilly, William 

H. Macy, Thomas Jane, and Alfred Molina. 

16. Hellraiser 

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Any dedicated horror fan has surely had their soul torn apart multiple times by 

Hellraiser's Pinhead (Doug Bradley) by this point. Director Clive Barker (adapting his 

own novella) crafted one of the most enduring tales of terror to come out of the 1980s, 

spawning one of the longest-running horror franchises out there as well. Hellraiser may 

only have a 68% rating on Rotten Tomatoes, but it's a certified classic of the genre, and 

needs to be watched by anyone who enjoys a good fright flick. Direct sequel Hellbound: 

Hellraiser II is also part of Netflix's roster. 

15. Scarface 

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While aspects of Scarface are now undeniably dated, director Brian De Palma's tale of 

the rise and fall of Cuban drug lord Tony Montana (Al Pacino) remains one of the most 

iconic films of the 1980s. Scarface has gone on to influence pop culture in a myriad of 

ways, especially when it comes to the hip hop music scene. Sporting an 82% score on 

RT, Scarface is one of those movies that begs to be seen at least once by any 

committed movie buff. 

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14. Full Metal Jacket 

From legendary director Stanley Kubrick, Full Metal Jacket is widely considered one of 

the greatest war films of all time, and holds a 93% rating on RT. Perhaps best 

remembered in pop culture for introducing drill sergeant turned actor R. Lee Ermey to 

the world, Full Metal Jacket also features great performances by Matthew Modine and 

Vincent D'Onofrio, long before their respective days as Netflix stars on Stranger Things 

and Daredevil. 

13. Ghostbusters 

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Before the Ghostbusters name became associated with endlessly divisive reboots, there 

was director Ivan Reitman's original 1984 hit. Starring Bill Murray, Dan Aykroyd, Harold 

Ramis, and Ernie Hudson as the titular team of paranormal investigators, Ghostbusters 

is to many the defining comedy of the 80s. Including countless hilarious gags - as well as 

some surprisingly creepy moments - Ghostbusters became a phenomenon. Sigourney 

Weaver and Rick Moranis also star in the supernatural comedy, which holds a 97% 

rating on Rotten Tomatoes. 

12. Casino 

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In 1995, director Martin Scorsese and two of his stars from Goodfellas would reunite for 

another terrific mob drama. While not quite as beloved as its predecessor, Casino is still 

held in high regard, holding an 80% score on RT. Once again based on true events, 

Casino stars Robert De Niro as Sam "Ace' Rothstein, a gangster overseeing the titular 

mob-run gaming establishment. Joe Pesci plays volatile enforcer Nicky Santoro, while 

Sharon Stone earned a Golden Globe for playing Ginger McKenna, Ace's ex-prostitute 

love interest. 

11. The Sixth Sense 

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While director M. Night Shyamalan's career hasn't quite lived up to what most expected, 

his 1999 breakout hit (85% score on RT) The Sixth Sense made such a great first 

impression that he's arguably been riding its wave ever since. Bruce Willis stars as Dr. 

Malcolm Crowe, a psychiatrist trying to help troubled young boy Cole (Haley Joel 

Osment), who is burdened with the ability to see and interact with ghosts. For those 

wondering, no, the big twist won't be spoiled here, for the small subset of people who 

aren't already aware of what it is. 

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10. Sin City 

Rendered mostly in black and white - with splashes of color - Sin City (77% on RT) is a 

neo-noir crime thriller with style to burn. Co-directed by Robert Rodriguez and Frank 

Miller - based on Miller's graphic novel of the same name - Sin City is an anthology of 

hard-edged tales, and features a star-studded cast. Just some of the big names on hand 

include Bruce Willis, Benicio Del Toro, Rosario Dawson, Jessica Alba, Clive Owen, and 

Mickey Rourke. 

9. The Conjuring 

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One of the creepiest films in recent memory, director James Wan's The Conjuring 

impressed both fans and critics, earning an 86% RT score and making lots and lots of 

money. The Conjuring has since spawned its own mini-cinematic universe of sequels 

and spinoffs, including about the possessed doll Annabelle. Patrick Wilson and Vera 

Farmiga star as real life "demonologists' Ed and Lorraine Warren, while Lili Taylor and 

Ron Livingston play the heads of the family beset by supernatural horrors. 

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8. Moana 

Featuring the voice talents of Auli'i Cravalho and Dwayne "The Rock' Johnson, Moana is 

one of Disney's most acclaimed non-Pixar animated efforts of the current decade. 

Focusing on the titular teenager's quest to restore the heart of the goddess Te Fiti to the 

ocean, Moana was a massive hit, and holds a 95% rating on RT. Moana received two 

Oscar nominations, one for Best Animated Feature, and another for Best Original Song. 

7. Schindler's List 

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An Oscar-darling - winning seven awards, including Best Picture and Best Director for 

Steven Spielberg - Schindler's List (97% on Rotten Tomatoes) is widely considered one 

of the greatest films of all time. However, it's also one of the hardest to watch, as the 

subject matter is just so incredibly sad. Liam Neeson stars as Oskar Schindler, a 

German businessman who effectively saved the lives of over a thousand Jews during 

the Holocaust by employing them in his factories. Ben Kingsley and Ralph Fiennes also 

star. 

6. Inglourious Basterds 

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Moving from one World War II era film to another, Inglourious Basterds is an alternate 

history story revolving around two interconnected plots to kill Nazi leaders. Directed by 

Quentin Tarantino, Inglourious Basterds stars Brad Pitt as Aldo Raine, leader of the 

titular squad. The film also helped make stars of Christoph Waltz, Diane Kruger, and 

Michael Fassbender. While a night and day different effort than Schindler's List, 

Tarantino's Basterds (88% on RT) are still very much one of the best films on Netflix and 

worthy subscribers' time. 

5. Thor: Ragnarok (Available June 5) 

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One of the most recent entries into Marvel Studios' MCU canon, director Taika Waititi's 

Thor: Ragnarok represented a major shift in tone and style from the prior Thor films. 

Thankfully, this new, sillier version of Thor went over well with the masses. Critics also 

loved it, with the sequel sporting a 92% score on RT. Ragnarok sees Chris Hemsworth's 

Asgardian hero set out to save his home from Hela (Cate Blanchett), aka the Goddess of 

Death. Assisting him in this quest are Loki (Tom Hiddleston), the Hulk (Mark Ruffalo), 

and Valkyrie (Tessa Thompson). 

4. It Follows 

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This stylish throwback to the horror films of the 80s stars Maika Monroe as Jay, a young 

woman who makes the mistake of hooking up with the wrong guy and becoming infected 

by an STD of supernatural origin. Now, Jay finds herself relentlessly stalked by a 

demonic being, one that can appear as anyone it wants, even those closest to her. 

Directed by David Robert Mitchell, It Follows sits at a 97% rating on Rotten Tomatoes. 

3. Kill Bill 

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While Vol.1 and Vol. 2 (85 and 84% on RT) of director Quentin Tarantino's revenge saga 

were technically released as separate films, it's hard to imagine wanting to watch one Kill 

Bill without the other. Uma Thurman stars as The Bride, who sets out on a bloody quest 

for vengeance after being betrayed by the other members of her assassination squad 

and their leader, Bill (David Carradine). Lucy Liu, Vivica A. Fox, Michael Madsen, and 

Daryl Hannah also star. 

2. The Godfather 

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What's left to say about The Godfather (98% on RT), director Francis Ford Coppola's 

opus about the fall of mafia don Vito Corleone (Marlon Brando) and rise of his son 

Michael (Al Pacino) to the blood-stained throne. Almost universally considered one of 

the greatest movies ever, The Godfather is a truly incredible film and one that it's almost 

impossible to call oneself a movie buff without having seen. James Caan, Robert Duvall, 

Diane Keaton, and John Cazale also star. 

1. The Godfather Part II 

So, why not combine this with its predecessor, like Kill Bill? The answer is that while this 

is indeed a direct continuation of The Godfather's story, it is also in many ways its own 

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beast. With Brando's Vito now gone, the journey of Michael as Corleone crime family 

don is juxtaposed with the rise of a young Vito, expertly played by Robert De Niro. Rated 

at 97% on Rotten Tomatoes, it's hard to choose between Godather and Godfather II for 

the title of best mafia movie, and not just one of the best films on Netflix, but one of the 

best films of all time. Ideally, one should just watch them both, and experience the whole 

saga. 

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The Predator: Interview With Director Shane Black 

Not much is known about The Predator , but hearing writer/director Shane Black explain 

his hopes for the film, it's hard not to get excited. Little is know even now, one year after 

speaking with Black and the movie's cast from the film's set. The first teaser trailer for 

The Predator aims to do little more than confirm that, even with the mind behind Kiss 

Kiss Bang Bang, The Nice Guys, and Iron Man 3 behind the camera, this is still every bit 

the Predator sequel fans would hope for . 

Seeing the film in action made that abundantly clear, but fans can hear straight from 

Shane Black his inspiration for returning to the Predator series, how he's flipping the 

formula on its head, and why the movie's action heroes are a different breed altogether. 

Can you talk about bringing back [writing partner] Fred Dekker? And why you wanted to 

collaborate with him on this? 

We'll, I've been working with Fred on a couple of different projects. We found that we 

sort of complement each other very well, and that goes back ages. They say that no 

matter how old you get, in your own mind you're never really capable of picturing more 

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than twenty-five years old as your current age. You always feel yourself to be roughly 

twenty-five. It's been thirty years in the business for Fred and myself, and you look in the 

mirror and part of you just says,'Jeez, it would be nice to be a kid again and go back and 

get that excitement back.' 

I mean, there's a maturity that comes with liking adult themes and adult subject matter, 

seeing Oscar-winning films... but every once in a while I'd say,'Boy, I'd just like to do a 

Predator movie with Fred.' Something that recalls for us all those wonderful, exciting 

days when we were geeks, lining up for Star Trek: Wrath of Khan when it played in 

Westwood at The National. 

So I think there was a great deal of nostalgia, and also a desire to do a kind of oldschool 

thriller in the form of The Predator. Because... there's a lasting quality that the 

original movie has that's due, I think in part, to the fact that it was made before it was so 

easy to just do a bunch of CGI effects and before videogames had taken hold as well. 

So there was a more visceral kind of war movie, thriller-esque quality to the material. 

Because they weren't saying,'What if the camera wooshed around and the character fell 

off a cliff and we followed him down and then when he hit we ran with him'... Who's the 

cameraman? [laughs] 

Fred and I just thought,'Let's make - obviously we've kept up on visual effects and 

technology, and we're big fans - but let's try to do an old-school... heartfelt kind of war 

movie surrounding this story. And all the elements were like, you know, spies, romance, 

mystery... just stuff as much genre into one pack as we can. So you can literally unpack 

different facets of the movie, which is sort of a stew that represents, to us, the genre 

movie that we would've loved to see when we were coming up. When we were all young 

and still felt twenty-five. 

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Stan Lee Safe After Being Threatened By Gunmen 

Legendary former Marvel Comics boss - and pop culture icon - Stan Lee was threatened 

outside his Los Angeles home by two gunmen, but is now safe. Lee will forever be 

revered by comics fans for co-creating such popular Marvel heroes as Spider-Man, Iron 

Man, The Incredible Hulk, Black Panther, and Daredevil. To those who grew to love 

Marvel via their films, Lee is well-known for his tendency to cameo in said projects, 

including appearances in all 19 Marvel Cinematic Universe installments released so far. 

Unfortunately, Lee's exalted status within pop culture hasn't prevented the man's life 

from being extremely complex as of late. Not only did he lose his beloved wife Joan last 

year, the 95-year-old Lee was also reported to be a victim of elder abuse, leading noted 

comic fan Kevin Smith to offer Lee a place in his own home. Lee ended up publicly 

refuting those abuse reports, as well as several unrelated accusations of sexual 

misconduct levied against him. He also recently filed a mammoth $1 billion fraud lawsuit 

against POW! Entertainment, a company he co-founded. 

As if that wasn't enough for one man to handle, The Daily Mail now reports that on 

Thursday night, Lee was accosted by two gunmen outside his Los Angeles home. Police 

were called around 7:30pm, due to reports that an armed man had been threatening 

Lee. Two men were detained by officers at the scene, although it's unclear if the 

suspects remain in custody. According to a witness who spoke to The Daily Mail, one of 

the men had confronted Lee about money supposedly owed to him. The witness also 

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says that the two men tossed their guns away prior to the arrival of the police, but that 

officers retrieved the weapons. The cause of the incident is still being investigated. 

Stan Lee's Hollywood home has in some ways been the epicenter of his turbulent 2018, 

even before this scary incident. In April, police were called after an intruder jumped a 

fence and attempted to break in. In February, police arrived at Lee's home to investigate 

one of the aforementioned claims of elder abuse against the legend. Some of Lee's 

sexual harassment accusers also claim he perpetrated the alleged acts at home, while 

being attended to by young female nurses. 

While it's obviously a relief to know that Stan Lee is fine after being threatened by 

gunmen, one wonders when his life will finally calm down a bit. This kind of stress isn't 

great for anyone, much less a 95-year-old man. In a small victory, it at least looks like 

Lee finally gained full control over his Twitter account recently, despite maintaining that 

his verified Facebook account remains outside his reach. 

There's One Big Secret in God of War That No One Has Found 

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The latest God of War is packed with secrets and references to past titles and other 

pieces of media. However, director Cory Barlog says that fans haven't found all of the 

secrets that the game holds. It's not just a small thing either, as he talked about it being 

a relatively major Easter Egg. 

One of the most notable secrets that players have discovered was the fact that players 

could craft what is essentially Thanos' Infinity Gauntlet for Kratos. It's a complicated 

ordeal, which requires doing multiple side-quests and collecting special items that are 

dropped by dragons, but it all ends with the player receiving one of the coolest skills in 

the entire game. If something that complex has already been discovered, it begs the 

question of how complex it must be to reveal and unlock the currently undiscovered one. 

"I still think there is one thing that no one has found yet that I know for certain,' Barlog 

told GamingBolt. He compared being able to keep a secret from fans this long to Metal 

Gear Solid V: The Phantom Pain's nuke disarmament ending, although he said it wasn't 

quite as meta as Hideo Kojima's hidden ending."I haven't seen any stories about it. Now 

I'm not going to tell you what that is, but I don't know if there's any cinematics per se, it 

seems like people have been able to get all the permutations. Not one person, but 

everyone collectively." 

This quote from Barlog will surely get God of War fans excited to jump back into the 

third-person action game. His cryptic teases will serve as a way to spark the flame within 

the community. Whether or not fans will be able to crack the code on the game's final 

secret remains to be seen, but there's no denying that they will try their best to do so. 

The already found secrets of God of War have really shown how much care and craft 

went into every design aspect of the PlayStation 4 exclusive. It clearly was a passion 

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project for Sony Santa Monica and director Cory Barlog has been vocal about how much 

the game means to him from a personal standpoint. All of the hidden references have 

made the latest entry in the series a celebration of its past. 

Note: The Next God Of War Game Won't Take Another 5 Years To Develop 

Yes, Fortnite is Definitely Coming to Nintendo Switch: 

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The battle royale shooter has become incredibly popular over the past year thanks to it 

hitting consoles before other popular titles in the genre. In fact, it's become so popular 

that it managed to surpass its main competitor PlayerUnknown's Battlegrounds (who 

they're currently in a legal situation with ), in terms of popularity and money earned. It's 

currently the most-played multiplayer game, and has already become so ingrained within 

pop culture that A$AP Rocky referenced the game in his new album, Testing. It's 

currently available on all other major gaming platforms and mobile, so bringing it to 

Nintendo Switch would be the final piece of the puzzle in terms of getting the free-to-play 

shooter everywhere. 

There's not much other information to be gleaned from the rating (translated via 

Newsweek ) besides the fact that the rumor is real. However, it does have some 

important ramifications as it also adds veracity to the other game titles that were listed in 

yesterday's leak. 

That means that the ports of Bandai Namco's Dragon Ball FighterZ, arcade hit Killer 

Queen, Ubisoft Toronto's action-adventure game Starlink: Battle for Atlas, FIFA 19, freeto-play 

shooter Paladins, and the unannounced party cooking game Overcooked! 2 are 

all likely real as well.These are all exciting announcements for Nintendo Switch gamers. 

Those that only own a Switch have been unable to play Fortnite, but can't escape 

hearing about the game due to how popular it is. Now, they'll finally be able to go handson 

with the free-to-play title and see what all the fuss is about for themselves. 

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Obviously this leak isn't how Nintendo and Epic Games wanted the announcement to be 

revealed, but it probably wasn't one of the biggest surprises planned for the Nintendo 

Direct anyhow. Nintendo's own first-party titles are always the star of their E3 showings, 

and this year won't be any different. Expect to see plenty of updates on the company's 

iconic franchises in less than two weeks. 

Godzilla vs. Kong Casts Deadpool 2 Actor Julian Dennison: 

Julian Dennison be joined by Millie Bobby Brown, Kyle Chandler, and possibly other 

Godzilla: King of the Monsters stars. The outlet also reports that Legendary Pictures has 

put out an offer to two-time Oscar-winner Frances McDormand to join the cast. This is 

not a terribly huge stretch as McDormand's resume does include some big-budget studio 

fare, including the role of Mearing in Transformers: Dark of the Moon. 

He may not have the vast experience or the trophies that Frances McDormand 

possesses, but Julian Dennison nonetheless has made a big impression in his brief 

career. Before Deadpool 2, Dennison gave a memorable performance as Ricky in Taika 

Waititi's quirky movie Hunt for the Wilderpeople. There's no question, though, that his 

appearance as Russell/Firefist in Deadpool 2 is the thing most people will know him for. 

The comic book film starring Ryan Reynolds, Josh Brolin, and Zazie Beetz opened to a 

whopping $125 million in its first weekend and has gone on to gross over $230 million 

domestically and $530 million worldwide (so far). 

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Now that the casting process appears to be underway, audiences should find out more 

about Godzilla vs. Kong in the near future, perhaps around Comic-Con International next 

month, especially since the movie is expected to start filming this October . 

Rumor: Birds Of Prey Movie Will Also Include Black Canary 

There are rumors that DC's Birds of Prey movie will actually include a big-screen 

adaptation of Black Canary. Although the character is strongly associated with the Birds 

of Prey brand, up until now, there hasn't been any actual news or rumors alluding to her 

involvement. 

Featuring Margot Robbie's Harley Quinn, Birds of Prey will reportedly start filming in 

early 2019. That means this film should be the next DC movie to hit theaters after the 

release of Patty Jenkins' Wonder Woman 2 , and it's an approach that makes sense. 

Although Suicide Squad proved rather divisive, Robbie's performance as Harley Quinn 

was universally praised, and Warner Bros. is keen on seeing Robbie return to the 

DCEU. Right now, little is known about the film, although there are a score of rumors - 

including that the main villain is the Penguin . 

According to Omega Underground , Black Canary will appear in Birds of Prey. However, 

it's worth taking the news with a grain of salt as her involvement hasn't been confirmed. 

And since there haven't been any character breakdowns or casting calls yet, a lot could 

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change for Birds of Prey between now and when production gets underway. It would be 

something of a surprise to see Black Canary switch gears from Gotham City Sirens to 

Birds of Prey, implying that the primary leads in this movie will still be superheroes. 

Given reports in January that Gotham City Sirens has been pulled , it's possible the two 

concepts have been merged to an extent. 

Although the DCEU was technically born with 2013's Man of Steel, it didn't actually get 

underway until Zack Snyder's Batman V Superman: Dawn of Justice released in 2016, 

which proved to be even more divisive than his Superman origin story. Unfortunately, not 

much changed when Suicide Squad released, which was a victim of choppy editing and 

a poor villain. The first real success in the DCEU was 2017's Wonder Woman . That film 

delighted viewers and critics alike, and the studio is no doubt hoping there'll be more 

successes down the road. With a mostly-female cast - and reportedly a potential allfemale 

crew as well - Birds of Prey could be another hit, should Warner Bros. 

commission a decent script. 

Pet Sematary Remake Casts Alien: Covenant's Amy Seimetz 

Paramount Pictures' Pet Sematary remake has found its female lead in Amy Seimetz, 

who recently had a small role in last year's Alien: Covenant film. Based on Stephen 

King's 1983 novel, Pet Sematary chronicles the bizarre and morbid experiences of the 

Creed family. After moving next to a burial ground, they soon uncover a deeper narrative 

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as their domestic bliss transforms into a real life nightmare. 

In 1989, Mary Lambert directed the first adaptation of the novel, which polarized viewers 

and critics by drifting from the source material, and for its over-the-top visual aesthetic. 

With film directors now taking a more psychological approach with King adaptations - 

evidenced by the 2017 films It , Gerald's Game and 1922 - moviegoers often expect 

more of a cerebral viewing experience rather than traditional jump scares that carried so 

many horror productions of the past, and that's what directors Kevin Kolsch and Dennis 

Widmyer are trying to accomplish with their Pet Sematary reboot. 

Deadline reports that Paramount Pictures has hired Amy Seimetz to co-star in Pet 

Sematary opposite Jason Clarke and veteran actor John Lithgow. Before landing a role 

in Alien: Covenant, Seimetz appeared in acclaimed indie thrillers like Adam Wingard's 

You're Next (2011), Shane Carruth's Upstream Color (2013), and Ti West's The 

Sacrament (2013). She also wrote, directed, edited, and produced the critically 

acclaimed 2012 film Sun Don't Shine. In recent years, Seimetz has directed episodes of 

Atlanta, The Girlfriend Experience, Halt and Catch Fire, and Stranger Things . 

Last month, Pet Sematary screenwriter Jeff Buhler said the remake will stay close to the 

original story , with the directors seeking to make the “scariest” King adaptation yet. With 

that said, it's worth noting that Seimetz and company will be working off a script that's 

co-written by David Kajganich, the screenwriter for Luca Guadagnino's remake of Dario 

Argento's Suspiria . Given the response to that film's first images, it seems that Pet 

Sematary will likely have a substantial amount of visceral horror to it, as opposed to fluffy 

dialogue and cheap scare tactics. 

Pet Sematary's release date was recently moved up by two weeks and it will now open 

opposite David F. Sandberg's Shazam! on April 5, 2019. With the Seimetz casting, Pet 

Sematary now has a solid foundation. Lithgow represents a familiar face, Clarke is 

arguably on the verge of becoming an A-list star (if he's not already), and Seimetz will 

likely function as the grounding force that brings everything together. Considering all the 

different pieces - the cast, crew, and subject matter - it seems the studio may have their 

own hit Stephen King movie on their hands. 

The Scariest Vaults in Bethesda's Fallout Series 

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Bethesda gave fans of Fallout a surprise with the reveal of Fallout 76. The game is going 

to be a move in a different direction for the post-apocalyptic RPG series, with the title 

reportedly set to step away from single player and instead focus on online multiplayer 

gameplay. Rather than an action RPG, Fallout 76 is also going to be a survival game 

akin to DayZ or Rust. 

Something that has already been the subject of much discussion is the setting of Fallout 

76 . The game looks as though it revolves around Vault 76, one of the as-yet-unexplored 

vaults that humanity used to survive the franchise lore's nuclear war. Vault 76 was set to 

open its doors twenty years after the war ended, and allow its population to then take 

back the overworld. 

This may sound like a struggle, but it's nothing in comparison to some of the other vaults 

that Vault-Tec built. Vault 76 stood as a control vault, but others were not so lucky, 

instead forcing their inhabitants to take part in terrifying experiments as a test of how 

humans would react to different pressures. With that in mind, here's a rundown of the ten 

scariest vaults from the Fallout series. 

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First appearing in Fallout 3, Vault 92 might not have been the easiest vault for the player 

to come across. Lying just clear of the deathclaw-infested Old Olney, even reaching the 

vault was something of a challenge. Those after a feel-good story to find inside, though, 

were left extremely disappointed. 

Vault 92 was billed to its inhabitants as a place to preserve the best musical talent of the 

world, and reportedly only the most talented musicians were invited to enter the vault. 

However, its real purpose was very different, and instead acted as a testing ground for 

white noise generators in an attempt to create super soldiers. Unsurprisingly, it didn't 

entirely go to plan, and according to logs half the population of the vault erupted into 

uncontrollable rage. 

By the time the Lone Wanderer reaches Vault 92, the vault is no longer inhabited by any 

humans, with instead bloatflies and mirelurks taking up residency. It's unknown whether 

any of the non-affected humans from Vault 92 survived, but it's clear that the white noise 

experiments were more powerful than anyone could have predicted. 

Volume 1.Issue 1 67


Vault 111 

Vault 111 will be familiar to anyone who has played Fallout 4 , acting as the player 

character's own vault. However, although it acts as a jumping off point for the game, this 

doesn't take away from the horror of the situation. Although it was billed as a vault to 

simply survive a nuclear war, instead Vault-Tec had a much more sinister goal in mind. 

This vault's experiment was aimed at studying the long-term effects of cryogenic 

freezing, and its poor test subjects were duped into entering the freezing pods upon 

entering the vault. The experiment was supposed to run on the relatively short term in 

comparison to some of the other vaults, with a team of security and scientists monitoring 

the test subjects. However, things didn't exactly go according to plan. 

Instead, the player character of Fallout 4 wakes a long time after the war, into a world 

they know longer recognise. Vault 111 may not be the most awful of the events that 

have happened in Fallout, but it's a prime example of Vault-Tec's folly. 

Volume 1.Issue 1 68


Volume 1.Issue 1 69


AI ethics council in Singapore will give smart advice 

The Singapore government 

recognises the power of AI -- 

it's good enough to defeat us 

at a game of Go -- and it also 

knows the technology has to 

be used responsibly. 

STR/AFP/Getty Images 

Singapore is taking the lead 

on one of the topics 

companies like Facebook 

and Google are grappling with: using artificial intelligence and data responsibly. 

A new council is being set up to advise the city-state's government on the ethical and 

legal use of AI and data, Singapore's Minister for Communications and Information S 

Iswaran announced at the opening of Innovfest Unbound Tuesday. 

Established to drive awareness and a better understanding of the benefits and 

challenges of AI, the council will advise the government on how it can develop and 

deploy AI responsibly. 

In particular, it will help develop ethics standards and reference governance frameworks, 

issue advisory guidelines, practical guidance and codes of practice for voluntary 

adoption by businesses, according to Iswaran. 

The council will help build "a trusted ecosystem" that assures consumer confidence as 

Singapore continues to develop itself as an AI hub and new business models emerge, 

the Infocomm Media Development Authority said, calling it a "timely" move. 

A five-year research program helmed by the Singapore Management University will also 

be established to support the work of the council. This program will drive discussion 

surrounding "ethical, legal, policy and governance issues" stemming from AI and data 

use. 

Volume 1.Issue 1 70


"We must leverage frontier technologies such as AI," said Iswaran. "It is a journey that 

private enterprises and consumers must walk together with the government, and we 

must… be plugged into the global flow of ideas, talents and opportunities." 

It comes at a time when giants like Facebook are ramping up efforts to keep its AI 

systems from ethical lapses. Google is using artificial intelligence with Duplex, its digital 

assistant that can call a local business to make appointments on your behalf, but this 

has also raised ethical concerns 

The partnership could bring more eyes to the sky. 

The Phantom 4 Pro, one of 

the drones currently 

available for law 

enforcement. 

DJI 

Taser-maker Axon and 

drone manufacturer DJI 

have partnered to sell 

surveillance drones to US 

law enforcement agencies. 

The Axon Air partnership, which Axon promoted in a press release on Tuesday, is 

designed to protect the chain-of-custody of evidence collected by drones. The program 

does this by linking the DJI drones to Axon's Evidence.com network, a data 

management system that preserves data from body cameras and in-car cameras. 

More than 200,000 public safety professionals use Evidence.com, according to Axon. 

Axon also makes Tasers and body cameras used by police departments around the 

country. 

More and more police departments are adopting drones, creating tension between public 

safety and privacy concerns. 

"DJI has always been very clear that we do not access any of the photos or videos that 

our customers produce," DJI spokesman Adam Lisberg said in response to the 

concerns. "Our customers have full control of their data." 

Volume 1.Issue 1 71


Drones currently available for sale through the Axon Air program are Phantom 4 Pro, 

Inspire 1, and Matrice 210. 

teases 28-hour laptop battery life. Here's what you need to know 

More battery life. We all want it, but batteries aren't improving, at least not quickly 

enough. So companies have to find battery savings elsewhere. But when it comes to 

laptops, chipmaker Intel may have just found a veritable jackpot. According to the 

company, Intel's new Low Power Display Technology will let a standard lightweight 

laptop run up to 28 hours on a charge. 

What's the secret? The screen. Intel says it's using a special LCD panel from Sharp and 

Innolux that consumes just 1 watt of power. That's half as much as a similar laptop 

screen would use before. 

Intel says a standard Dell XPS 13 with the screen installed lasted 25 hours and 14 

minutes, while a prototype Intel device managed the full 28 hours. More generally, the 

company's forecasting 4 to 8 hours of local video file playback for systems that adopt the 

technology. 

Mind you, when Intel says "28 hours," you should know we're probably not talking about 

heavy use. The company also claims the existing Dell XPS 13 already manages 20 

hours on a charge, but we only saw 12 hours of streaming video playback in our review. 

That gives you some perspective. 

Intel also says its 28-hour run was with the screen set to 150 nits of brightness (dimmer 

than you might be used to) and using headphones instead of speakers. 

And if you want to take advantage of improved battery life, you probably won't be able to 

simply install a new Sharp or Innolux screen in your existing PC. It requires Intel's power 

management solution, plus The Verge reports that it only works with Intel's integrated 

graphics, not the Nvidia or AMD solutions you might want for gaming. 

But when it comes to battery life, I'll take what I can get. 

The Chinese telecommunications giant has been in the US government's 

crosshairs for security concerns. 

Facebook gave Chinese telecommunications giant Huawei special access to data about 

the social media giant's users, the New York Times reported Tuesday. 

The agreement between Facebook and Huawei, which dates back to at least 2010, gave 

special data access to Huawei, a company perennially in the crosshairs of the US 

government, the Times reported, citing sources inside the social media giant. Facebook 

also has similar arrangements with Lenovo, Oppo and TCL, but plans to wind down the 

Huawei deal by the end of the week, a Facebook representative said, confirming the 

Times' report. 

Volume 1.Issue 1 72


The arrangements came out of efforts to integrate the Facebook experience with mobile 

devices, something a Facebook representative called a "standard industry practice." 

"Facebook's integrations with Huawei, Lenovo, OPPO and TCL were controlled from the 

get go -- and we approved the Facebook experiences these companies built," Francisco 

Varela, vice president of Facebook mobile partnerships, said in a statement. "Given the 

interest from Congress, we wanted to make clear that all the information from these 

integrations with Huawei was stored on the device, not on Huawei's servers." 

Facebook's arrangement with Huawei appears to be one of many the Times reported 

Sunday that the social media giant has in place to provide access to large amounts of 

user data to at least 60 different device makers -- including Amazon, Microsoft, 

Samsung and BlackBerry. 

Huawei is the world's third-largest smartphone maker by volume, but it has struggled to 

make a dent in the US, partly because of concerns expressed by the government, 

including the FBI, CIA, NSA, the Federal Communications Commission and House 

Intelligence Committee. 

In February, FBI Director Chris Wray told the Senate Intelligence Committee the FBI was 

"deeply concerned" about the risks posed by Huawei and ZTE, a Chinese device maker 

on which the Commerce Department imposed a "denial of export privileges" in April. 

Facebook has been under scrutiny since the revelation in March that consultancy 

Cambridge Analytica had misused Facebook user data in the lead up to the 2016 US 

presidential election. Since then, Facebook CEO Mark Zuckerberg has testified in front 

of Congress and the European Parliament to answer questions about Facebook's 

handling of user data. 

In a test, a New York Times reporter logged into Facebook using a 2013 BlackBerry 

device, using an account with roughly 550 friends, monitoring the data requested and 

received. Through a BlackBerry app called The Hub, the device was able to acquire 

"identifying information" for up to 295,000 Facebook users. 

Sen. Mark Warner, the top Democrat on the Senate Intelligence Committee, pointed out 

that concerns about Huawei were not new, citing a 2012 congressional report on the 

"close relationships between the Chinese Communist Party and equipment makers like 

Huawei." 

"The news that Facebook provided privileged access to Facebook's API to Chinese 

device makers like Huawei and TCL raises legitimate concerns, and I look forward to 

learning more about how Facebook ensured that information about their users was not 

sent to Chinese servers," Warner said in a statement. 

Facebook and Huawei representatives didn't immediately respond to requests for 

comment. 

Volume 1.Issue 1 73


Food&Diet 

Volume 1.Issue 1 74

The true about low Carb Beers 

You’ve had a long week. You’re finally at the bar with the guys on a Saturday catching 

up over a few beers, and the last thing you want to do is overthink you’re order. Here’s 

the problem with that: The low-carb craze is everywhere, including your local bar taps. 

Not only are diets taunting the fad, like Paleo and Atkins, increasing in popularity, but 

now supermarket aisles are loaded with low-carb options from breads to frozen dinners. 

With good reason, too. Reducing carbohydrate intake alone can help individuals reduce 

fat build up in the liver by up to 42 percent, according to one study published in the 

American Journal of Clinical Nutrition. 

By definition, a low-carb diet ranges from 60 to 130 grams of high-quality carbohydrates 

(think high in fiber produce and whole grains) daily, according to the Mayo Clinic. In 

comparison, the recommended intake is between 225 and 325 grams of carbohydrates, 

according to the USDA's dietary guidelines. 

“Low-carb beers have fewer calories and carbs but can still taste great,” says Azania 

Andrews, Vice President, Michelob ULTRA. “Whether someone is physically active on a 

regular basis, just beginning to get back themselves back in shape, or simply looking for 

a beer that keeps them a little lighter on their feet, a low-carb beer is almost always a 

solid go-to pick.”

By contrast, regular beers contain 145 calories and 11 grams of carbs per 12-ounce 

serving on average, but these numbers can vary. For example, Heineken has 142 

calories and 11 grams of carbs, Budweiser has 145 calories and 10.6 grams of carbs, 

and Corona Extra has 148 calories and 14 grams of carbs. 

The question remains: is going low carb really worth putting down your Bud 

Heavy? 

What's the Difference Between a Low-Carb Beer and a Regular Brew? 

Low-carb beers hold the promise of fewer calories, less carbs and, supposedly, no 

undesirable beer gut. Most regular beers average out at 145 calories and 11 grams of 

carbs per 12-ounce serving. For example, Budweiser has 145 calories and 10.6 grams 

of carbs, Miller High Life has 143 calories and 13.1g of carbs, and Blue Moon has 171 

calories and 13.7g of carbs. Low carb beers, on the other hand, sit around (or under!) 

the 100-calorie, 2 grams of carbs mark for a 12-ounce serving. Whereas Budweiser 

Select, their flagship low-carb option, has 55 calories and 1.9g carbs, Michelob Ultra has 

95 calories and 2.6g carbs. 

What Brands Should I Drink? 

You're going to want to look for anything with "light" or "select" on the label. Take a look 

at a few of the best options. 

Keystone Light tops our list of beers in calories with 104 per serving and 5 grams of 

carbs. Budweiser Select and Busch Light give you the highest alcohol content (not by 

much) but that Budweiser Select is only 55 calories.

Is It Worth the Switch? 

Depends what you're drinking it for, says Anne Becerra, Beer Curator and Director of 

Treadwell Park. Plain and simple: Beer has carbs, and if that's your one and only criteria 

for how you choose what to consume, then you should probably pick another beverage if 

you want to enjoy your sip. 

"If you're choosing to drink beer because of the amazing flavors and styles that are 

available, the key (as with anything) is balance," says Becerra. "A full flavored, complex 

craft beer offers an experience — something that's enjoyable and satisfying. When you 

really pay attention to what you're drinking and savor each sip, generally you won't need 

as much to feel fulfilled." 

Ask yourself: How long am I going to be drinking for, and what's my mission here? If it's 

Game Day and you know you'll be sipping for hours, low-carb options will be better for 

your waistline. “Beer is something that’s meant to be enjoyed, and while it’s great to cut 

down on calories and carbs, ultimately you want your beer to be refreshing and taste 

great,” says Andrews. 

Since low-carb and light beers aren't offering the World Series of flavor, do yourself a 

favor and switch out for seltzer water every few. You'll still get the satisfaction of a 

carbonated-sip, without the calories. However, Becerra wants you to try and reevaluate 

that marathon, beer slamming mentality. 

"Slamming multiple 'low-carb' beers with little flavor may not bring you the same amount 

of enjoyment contribute that you'll get from drinking one or two beers you genuinely 

love," she cautions. "Instead, use a nice glass, notice the aromas, pay attention to flavor, 

pick beers you love and enjoy them." 

If you do plan on drinking for an extended period of time, think about switching away 

from beer altogether, suggests Manuel Villacorta, MS, RD and founder of Whole Body 

Reboot. "Wine is lower in carbs than beer," he says. "Spirits such as whiskey and vodka 

contain zero carbs, but be careful for sweet drinks.

He also cautions about what alcohol in general does to the body. "When you're drinking 

alcohol from any source, whether that be beer, wine, whisky, or vodka, your body 

(specifically, your liver) halts fat metabolism because it's busy metabolizing the alcohol," 

he says. 

More Flavor, Please 

There are certain steps you can take to enhance the flavor of low-carb beers. First, buy 

dark bottles or cans rather than green or clear bottles, and store them away from 

sunlight in order to prevent skunking. 

Serve it very cold, straight from the fridge, and don't drink it from the bottle or can. Pour 

the beer into a glass and let the foam settle for the best results; if possible, serve it in 

frosted mugs. 

Finally, you can try squeezing some fresh lime into your glass to enhance the taste.

The Dad Bod Nutrition Plan 

One of the big misconceptions about making a beer belly disappear is that you have to 

eat less food. In my experience, that’s not quite true, not if the last two weeks are 

anything to go by. 

I’m attempting to give my body a much-needed makeover before I become a father next 

month. That means training four times a week. It means giving up alcohol. Inevitably, it 

also means significant changes to my diet. But while I’m eating slightly fewer calories 

than I was, I’d never describe it as less food. 

Take a sample day in my gut last week: protein pancakes and fruit for breakfast, baked 

fish and veg at lunch, a boiled egg for a mid-afternoon snack, a steak salad for tea and 

massaman curry for dinner. 

Whichever way you serve it, there’s nothing “less” about that. 

Rule #1: Eat A Lot 

That day (and most days) I ate 2,450 calories, all delicious and carefully plotted to help 

me hit my target. “We work out your basal metabolic rate [the calories you burn day by 

day], then work out exactly what you need to achieve your goal,” explains Georgia 

Bellas, a nutritionist with Fresh Fitness Foods. 

That’s the food delivery company I’ve tasked with taking out my beer belly. They’re a bit 

like Deliveroo, except they cook all of their own food and none of it is junk. You give 

them your vital statistics and explain your goals, and they do all the nutritional arithmetic 

and design a diet that will get you there. Then they deliver it to you, every day. 

For me, the goal is to get rid of my dad bod. I’m what some people call a skinny fat man: 

lean and lanky everywhere except the midriff, which juts out like a sad, overhanging 

clifftop. I don’t want to lose weight, necessarily, just the fat that’s begun to spill over the 

top of my jeans. Fortunately, Georgia has a plan.

Rule #2: Eat Right 

“It’s about altering your body composition – decreasing your fat and maintaining your 

lean muscle,” she tells me. “We place you on ‘maintenance calories’ – it’s a slight, 10% 

calorie deficit – and ensures you’re still getting enough calories to fuel your workouts and 

to make sure your body doesn’t burn muscle.” 

A cornerstone of the FFF approach is knowing your macros – i.e. designing meals with a 

carefully balanced mix of protein, carbs and fat to match your stated goals. My daily 

calories are now 40% protein, 30% carbohydrates and 30% fat. (Find out more about 

macrotracking here). 

The inclusion of some carbs is a relief. I’d envisioned plate after plate of chicken and 

broccoli, but it doesn’t have to be that boring. I’ve had rice, sweet potato chips, even 

some protein waffles for breakfast. “The carbohydrate component, which is 30% of your 

total daily calories is important because when you work out, the primary source of fuel 

you use is carbohydrate. Once you burn those stores you then switch to your fat 

The meat keeps changing, too. As well as staples like steak or chicken breast, I’m eating 

more fish, turkey burgers or slow-cooked beef brisket – again, not something I ever 

expected on a diet. 

To be clear, my gut hasn’t vanished yet, but it seems like it’s on the retreat. I’ve lost a 

little more than a kilo in two-and-a-half weeks. My belly is still visible, still squishy, but 

not arrogantly protruding like it was. I feel less bloated, too. 

It’s my behaviour that I’m most interested in, though. I don’t feel like my willpower has 

been tested yet. I’m not missing anything. I’m not cheating. My 3pm sugar cravings – a 

stubborn thorn in the side of my ambitions to become a Calvin Klein underwear model – 

are curiously absent.

Rule #3: Eat Often 

I’m putting it down to the fact that I’m eating four big meals a day, which is probably the 

biggest change I’ve noticed. There’s food coming every few hours, so the urge for inbetweener 

snacks like crisps or rogue slices of toast just isn’t there any more. My wife is 

dutifully working through the leftover Christmas chocolates on her own (she’s coping, I 

think). 

Before starting this, I made the same mistakes as everyone else. Instead of four meals a 

day, I’d eat two-and-a-half: a quick breakfast, a slightly bigger lunch, a much bigger 

dinner with snacks (the bad kind) between meals. So it’s no wonder I have a pot, really. 

Small, hastily-munched breakfasts mean you start slow and your metabolism barely gets 

going. Worse, saving the majority of your daily calories for your evening meal has two 

major consequences: 1) you’re hungry in the day when a siren packet of Jaffa Cakes 

might give you the eye, and 2) you go to bed with a belly full of pasta or potato, high-GI 

carbs that your body will likely turn to blubber overnight. Then you wake up and do it all 

over again. 

Now, I eat once before 7.30am, again at noon, back for more at 4, with the final meal 

passing my lips around 8pm. All four meals are roughly the same size, with similar 

calories counts (between 450-600cals for me). 

“Eating more frequently and limiting the time between meals will ensure that you’re not 

getting hungry and have that urge to overeat at your next meal,” Georgia says. “It 

maintains steady blood sugar levels, which is important as well.” 

I’d be lying if I said the new regime is not without its sacrifices. I haven’t had any alcohol, 

bread, sweets or milk since I started. Last week, I threw out a block of cheese that was 

going mouldy in the fridge – it felt like throwing a puppy off a bridge. 

I don’t miss any of it, though. I’m enjoying my food and I feel both full and energetic. The 

big test, of course, will come when the baby arrives. Will I be as disciplined when I’ve 

had no sleep? We’ll see, but I’ve tried to design the Dad Bod Project with convenience in 

mind.

A lot of my workouts involve bodyweight moves that I can do at home. When I’m not 

training at home, my gym is very close to the office. And Fresh Fitness Food’s offering is 

stupendously attractive because it saves you the triple-threat hassle of working out what 

to eat, where to buy it and how to cook it. 

If there’s one thing I’ve learnt so far about getting into shape it’s this no-brainer: the 

easier you make it, the harder it is to fail. 

Week 0: Why Do Expectant Fathers Put On Weight? 

Week 1: The Olympics Champion's Dad Bod Workout Plan 

11 Struggles Only People Who Have Given Up Carbs Will Understand: 

If you're looking to lose weight and burn fat, you might entertain the prospect of giving up 

carbs. Some choose to go without carbs completely to try and get into a state of ketosis 

– when your body switches to burning fat for energy as a result of a low calorie intake – 

and others will stick to a low-carb, high-fat, high-protein diet to promote fat loss. Either 

way, your carb-gorging days are over.

And whilst the debate about whether carbs are good for you or not rages on, there's one 

thing we can all agree on: Giving up carbs sucks. All of a sudden, your world is turned 

upside down. You can't eat the stuff you love any more. No bread, no chips, NO PIZZA. 

And going without your Mighty Meaty order on a Saturday night in isn't the only struggle 

– there are many more, like the mood swings, the culinary boredom, the mental poops. 

Yes, these are the 11 struggles only people who give up carbs will understand. How 

many do you recognize? 

You have to break up with pizza 

It's the obvious one, but also the most painful one. Any break-up is bad but this, 

this 

It's the obvious one, but also the most painful one. Any break-up is bad but this, this 

stings. And it's not only pizza you have to say cheerio to – it's all the others too; pasta, 

potatoes, mid-afternoon digestives. The perfect carb orgy, gone, just like that. The worst 

part? You're going to run into your ex EVERYWHERE. You may even witness one of 

your good pals engaging in oral activity with them. Just remember to resist temptation, 

don't go back there. No matter how irresistible they come, be the bigger man. 

You feel like you've just gotten over the flu 

You feel weak. A shadow. A man unable to sleep at night (yes, hunger pangs can keep 

you up at night). But only for the first three or four days, mind, until your body adapts. 

But those three or four days are horrible. You're hungry ALL THE TIME, only this time, 

the phrase 'feed a cold' is no longer an acceptable reason for demolishing a large 

Wasabi katsu curry and sticky rice. 

You only have a choice of three drinks 

Black coffee, green tea or water. Man, better hope you can get used to those. 

The sheer volume of broccoli it takes to feel full is A LOT

When the broccoli is on special offer at the supermarket it brings a brief smile to your 

face, but when you catch yourself putting five bunches into your trolley that smile is very 

quickly wiped off. Why do you do it? You can rely on broccoli. It's nutritionally amazing. 

It's easy to cook. And it's the most value for money green vegetable you can buy. 

Broccoli won't let you down. But you'll fry it, steam it, bake it, boil it and eat it raw, and 

realise that sadly, as with anything you eat over and over again, it tastes bland 

whichever way you cook it. 

Office cake is out to get you 

You're doing so well. You've successfully avoided coming face-to-face with a single carb 

for a whole week and then someone announces it's their birthday and five cakes appear 

in the kitchen. Damn it. No, Dave, I don't want some of your birthday cake. Yes, I feel 

like a right tw*t for turning you down but that Victoria sponge would sit much better in 

your belly fat not mine. It's even worse when it's your own birthday because not only do 

you then have to cut (sometimes even buy) your own cake, but then you have to 

embarrassingly shuffle away as everyone waits for you to have the first slice. Great. 

WTF poops 

It's not pretty and it's certainly not funny – spending half the morning on the office throne 

– but it's a distinct possibility on a low-carb diet. You've drastically lowered your intake of 

stodgy carbs and it's wreaked absolute mayhem on your digestive system. It's supposed 

to be a relaxing break from your desk, but now your mid-morning poo has become a 

rather, er, painful task. 

You instantly hate anyone else eating carbs 

The moment you switch to the 'light' side, you instantly feel hatred build inside of you 

whenever you see someone else shovelling a slice of pizza down their throat. This 

person could even be your mate – a mate you like very much – but an uncontrollable 

urge to smack that pizza right out of their hands seems to well up. And you hate this side 

to you too, as well as the way you suddenly feel the need to educate everyone else on 

how their carb consumption habits are unhealthy and that they should join you on your 

joyless quest. 

Seemingly dull carbs suddenly look heavenly

Baked potatoes. When do you EVER crave one? Never. But now you do. Now even the 

smell of a dry, plain baked potato is enough to arouse your taste buds. Likewise, the 

thought of having some fresh, plain pasta is a real treat. Chocolate? No thanks, give me 

a plain bagel. Weird. 

90% of the supermarket is now useless 

There was a time when food shopping was fun. When the choice was truly yours. When 

you could peruse all the aisles and get taken in by whatever marketing spiel and fancy 

new packaging was on the shelf. It was naughty, but you enjoyed it. Nowadays all you 

need is a kilo of chicken and two kilos of green veg. Where's the fun in that? 

You're poorer 

The thing is, when you substitute protein for carbs to keep you full, everything is just a 

f*ck ton more expensive. It hits your bank balance hard – eating healthy is pricey. How 

this is allowed to happen is a miracle to you, when the government is preaching about 

how bad ready meals are and how everyone should eat more veg. Why hitch the prices 

up then, eh? Madness. 

You go to bed hungry and it sucks 

When you start a lean, low-carb diet you might be eating more food, but don't feel full. 

You feel a bit empty, all the time. Granted, this feeling disappears after a few days as 

your body adapts to the reduced calorie intake but right here, right now it sucks. And it's 

the worst when you have to go to bed hungry. You toss and turn, constantly trying to not 

to think about food. You look forward to sleeping because then it will be morning and 

you'll be able to eat again at breakfast. You used to count down the days to the weekend 

– now you're counting down the hours until your next bowl of broccoli. Why are you 

doing this to yourself? 

Ah well, at least you're going to look shredded! We know it can feel like a load of b*llocks 

but remember why you got into this in the first place; to drop weight, burn fat and get 

lean AF. Keep going. And at the end of it, you could look like this! Absolutely shredded. 

You can do it. 

Get Super Lean With Carb Cycling - Here's Your 101 Guide

We live in a world where carbs are painted as the enemy of weight loss and the cause of 

the obesity epidemic. And while a high-carb diet can lead to weight gain and health 

problems, it can also help you lose fat and improve your body composition. 

How? The answer, my friends, is carb cycling. 

Carb Cycling: How Does It Work? 

Carb cycling isn’t so much a diet in the classic sense as it is a way to structure your 

eating. Basically, you cycle days of high-carb eating with days of low-carb eating in order 

to give your body the nutrients it needs when it needs them most. 

Your high-carb days are going to coincide with days of intense physical activity, such as

esistance training or high-intensity interval training. Carbs are converted into glycogen 

(the body’s preferred source of fuel), so we want to give the body more energy when it 

needs it the most. Low-carb days fall on the days when you perform little to no physical 

activity, because your body doesn’t need the extra energy. 

The rules of carb cycling are pretty simple. On days you’re performing intense workouts , 

you’ll eat a higher-carb, lower-fat diet. Then, on days when you rest or perform lowintensity 

activity, you’ll eat a lower-carb, higher-fat diet. Protein consumption will stay 

relatively consistent in either case. 

You can find a lot of different recommendations for how to set up your carb cycling diet, 

but here is a good starting point: 

High-Carb Days 

Carbs: 1.5-2.5 grams per pound of bodyweight 

Protein: 1.0-1.25 grams per pound of bodyweight 

Fat: as little as possible 

Low-Carb Days 

Carbs: 0.5-1.0 grams per pound of bodyweight 

Protein: 1.0-1.25 grams per pound of bodyweight 

Fat: 0.2-0.4 grams per pound of bodyweight

Carb cycling allows you to take advantage of the specific metabolic processes that take 

place in your body. Eating carbs has an effect on a few different hormones, and these 

hormones affect how we lose fat. 

Insulin 

Carbs have the biggest effect on the release of insulin. The more carbs we consume, the 

more insulin gets released. Insulin is good in the sense it helps your body send nutrients 

where it needs them the most. But chronically elevated levels of insulin can make you 

insulin resistant and increase your body’s storage of fat. 

Intense exercise makes you more sensitive to insulin, meaning that when you consume 

carbs around workouts, your body will be better able to utilize them for energy rather 

than fat storage.This is why high-carb days fall on the same days as your intense 

workouts. 

When you aren’t training hard, however, your body doesn’t need the extra energy, so 

carb cycling utilizes low-carb days to help promote the burning of stored energy (aka 

fat). 

Leptin 

Leptin is known as the hunger hormone. It gets released during periods of over-feeding 

to let us know that we’re full and don’t need to eat anymore. An increased caloric intake 

promotes the secretion of leptin, also causing it to speed up our metabolism. 

Chronic overeating, however, can make you resistant to the effects of leptin. Instead of 

getting the feeling of being satisfied, the signals don’t get to your brain so you keep 

overeating. 

Under-eating, like when you’re trying to lose weight, also affects leptin. The more you 

diet, the less leptin you produce. And the less leptin you produce, the hungrier you feel. 

Carb cycling works to keep leptin levels in check because it alternates periods of overfeeding 

(high-carb days) with under-feeding (low-carb days). This helps keeps leptin 

secretion at optimal levels.

Carb Cycling Pros 

The obvious pro here is that you don’t need to go on a low-carb diet to lose weight, 

which would be challenging for a lot of people. Eating carbs promotes the release of 

serotonin in your brain. This hormone helps boost mood and is often used to treat 

depression. 

Low-carb diets naturally decrease serotonin levels, often leaving dieters feeling down, 

depressed, and craving sugar. By cycling your carb intake, you can minimize the effects 

of low serotonin levels. 

Carb cycling also improves your workouts and performance thanks to the high-carb days 

that give your body easily accessible energy when it needs it the most. This will lead to 

more calories burned overall, and better muscle growth. 

Carb Cycling Cons 

The biggest drawback of carb cycling is that for it to work effectively, you need to count 

macros and calories. No matter how effective carb cycling is at manipulating your 

hormonal environment to aid in fat loss, it still doesn’t supersede a caloric deficit. For this 

reason, it’s somewhat of a more advanced strategy. 

“Carb cycling is considered an aggressive and high-level nutrition strategy. Only people

whose nutritional adherence is extremely high (such as physique athletes) and who 

require a more meticulous nutritional approach should use it," says Dr. Ryan Andrews of 

Precision Nutrition. 

There are those who say that carb cycling works without having to count calories. And 

while that may be true, it’s not optimal. If you’re looking for long-term, continual progress, 

counting calories makes it much easier to adjust your diet based on your results. 

The other drawback is that if you’re not someone who is regularly engaged in highintensity 

training, carb cycling probably isn’t for you. Your body simply doesn’t need as 

many carbs, so it doesn’t make sense to cycle them — and you can probably get away 

with eating a low-to-moderate amount daily as long as you’re in a caloric deficit. 

The Verdict 

When done correctly, carb cycling is a solid nutritional approach. In fact, it may be the 

most effective and efficient way to improve body composition. It also seems to be 

particularly effective in helping already fairly lean individuals lose the last few pounds. 

However, it is a little bit more of an advanced strategy, and probably not something a 

first-time dieter should jump into. 

Rating Carb Cycling 

Convenience/Feasibility — 15/20 

The biggest downside of carb cycling is that you’re essentially eating two different diets: 

One day your meals consist of high-carb, low-fat foods, and the next day they consist of 

low-carb, high-fat foods. 

If you’re tracking your calories and macros, this can cause a bit of a headache because 

you have to keep track of two different numbers. Speaking from experience though, after 

about a week or two in, you really don’t think about it much. 

Cost — 20/20

There’s nothing special you need to purchase for this — just whole, minimally processed 

foods. And like we talked about in the clean eating review, those foods really aren’t that 

much more expensive than their highly-processed counterparts. 

Safety — 20/20 

There’s nothing inherently dangerous or unsafe about carb cycling. In fact, it can provide 

a lot of hormonal benefits that can improve your overall health. 

Flexibility — 20/20 

Carb cycling is based on flexibility. One day you’re allowed to eat more carbs, and the 

next day you can eat more fat. This allows to you eat a wide variety of foods during the 

week, which increases diet adherence by reducing the monotony of eating the same 

thing every day. 

Effectiveness — 20/20 

Carb cycling can be a very effective way to lose body fat and improve body composition. 

It allows you to take advantage of specific metabolic processes that can help you 

improve your body composition much more efficiently than by using caloric restriction 

alone. 

It also allows you to enjoy a wider range of food. If you can be disciplined and monitor 

your intake properly, carb cycling will produce great results. 

Final Score — 95/100

If hitting the gym on the regular isn’t resulting in the swelling silhouette you envisioned, 

you may not be sending your muscles the right message. Key variables in your training 

— sets, reps, weight, rest — determine the outcome of your efforts, so it’s important to 

ensure those factors are aligned towards your goal. 

Here, created using a combination of high volume, varying weight, and controlled rest 

periods, you’ll find a simple and effective muscle-building workout plan, designed to pack 

mass onto your entire body. “For the skinny dude, this is a great workout to put on some 

serious muscle,” says celebrity trainer and elite endurance athlete Alex Isaly, the 

architect behind this bulk-up blueprint. 

The workouts in this program are programmed to increase muscle size and strength 

using a popular muscle-building methodology called “drop sets.” Unlike regular sets, 

which follow a uniform rep scheme (e.g. three sets of 10 reps), drop sets decrease in 

reps as you go (e.g. three sets: 12, 10, 8 reps, and so on). 

“The added stress on the muscles amplifies muscle growth, Isaly says. “Drop sets 

activate the deepest muscle fibers, leading to maximum growth.” 

The three workouts in this program can be used as standalone sessions to target 

specific muscle groups, or performed consecutively (and yes, repeatedly) with 1–2 rest 

days between workouts as an ongoing full-body workout plan. 

How It Works 

Find yourself a bench and grab three sets of dumbbells — that’s all you’ll ever need for 

any workout in this plan. You want to be able to do no more than 12 reps of a given 

exercise with your heaviest pair of dumbbells. “Each set of weights should be heavy 

enough to take you to failure on the last couple of reps,” Isaly says.

Rest for 2 minutes between sets and 3 minutes between exercises. 

The Workouts 

Function: Muscle growth, strength 

Modality: Drop sets 

Intensity: Medium to high 

Level: Intermediate to advanced 

Target: Full body Equipment: 

Dumbbells, adjustable bench 

Workout 1: Chest, Shoulders, Triceps 

Workout 2: Back, Biceps, Abs 

Workout 3: Legs

Day 1: Chest, Shoulders, and Triceps 

Block 1: Chest 

Decline Bench Press (12, 10, 8) 

Flat Bench Press (12, 10, 8) 

Incline Bench Press (12, 10, 8) 

Flat Bench Fly (12, 10, 8) 

Incline Bench Fly (12, 10, 8) 

Block 2: Shoulders 

Front Raise (12, 10, 8) 

Seated Lateral Raise (12, 10, 8) 

Seated Rear Delt Fly (12, 10, 8) 

Seated Overhead Press (12, 10, 8) 

Block 3: Triceps 

Seated Single-Arm Triceps Extension (12, 10, 8) 

Skullcrushers (12, 10, 8) 

Bodyweight Dips (Until failure)

Day 2: Back, Biceps, and Abs 

Block 1: Back 

Bent-over Reverse Fly (12, 10, 8) 

Single-Arm Dumbbell Row (12, 10, 8) 

Wide-Grip Pullups (Until failure) 

Supermans (Until failure) 

Block 2: Biceps 

Incline Bench Bicep Curls (12, 10, 8)

Cross-body Hammer Curls (12, 10, 8) 

Block 3: Abs 

Russian Dumbbell Twist (15, 15) 

Dumbbell Crunch (15, 15) 

Dumbbell Toe Touch (15, 15) 

Day 3: Legs 

Dumbbell Step-Up (12, 10, 8) 

Dumbbell Squat (12, 10, 8) 

Dumbbell Calf Raise (12, 10, 8) 

Dumbbell Stiff-Leg Deadlift (12, 10, 8)

Daily Undulating Periodization (DUP) Training 

Whether your goal is to lose fat or build muscle, many fitness experts agree that there is 

one type of training you should prioritize over all others — strength training. 

Now, when I say strength training, I’m not talking about going to the gym and pumping 

out 3 sets of 10 on biceps and triceps every other day. No, I’m talking about pure, 

unadulterated, strength training. The type of training that separates the men from the 

boys; where you’re actually a little bit scared to get under the bar. 

There are many different programs out there that focus on helping you build strength: 

5x5, 5/3/1, Westside, etc. In this article, were going to talk about one of the best and 

most fun (in my opinion) programs for increasing your overall strength: daily undulating 

periodization (DUP).

What is Daily Undulating Periodization? 

DUP is a method of programming that has you performing a core set of movements 

three or more times per week, working in different rep ranges with each session. 

Let’s look at each component individually: 

Daily: During each workout, you’ll be performing the same main movements. These 

movements are compound, multi-joint exercises like the squat, deadlift, bench press, 

and overhead press (or the variation of these that suit you the best). 

Undulating: Undulating is defined as “moving in a wave-like motion.” With DUP, the 

weights, rep scheme, and intensity you use for each exercise will change with every 

workout ,going from light to moderate to heavy weights, and from high to medium to low 

reps. 

Periodization:The goal of periodization is progression towards maximizing strength 

while minimizing fatigue and injury. With DUP, the daily variation of periodization places 

enough stress on your body to continually make progress, yet it doesn’t allow it to adapt 

to the stress and plateau. 

So basically, you are performing the same exercises during every workout, just with 

different loads and rep ranges. But won’t training like this lead to overtraining, excess 

fatigue, and injury? Actually, no — for a couple of reasons. 

One, the change in rep scheme and load ensures that you are not overworking a single 

area. Not only that, but the higher frequency of work increases your body’s motor 

learning capabilities. Basically, this means that the more you perform an exercise, the 

better you get at it. 

In addition, increased training frequency increases muscle protein synthesis, leading to 

more strength and more muscle gains over time.

How to Program DUP 

Since this may be your first introduction to DUP, we’ll start off with a basic sample 

program that has you performing squats, deadlifts, and bench press three times a week. 

But you will be performing the exercises in different rep ranges each day: These are 

usually classified as power, strength, and hypertrophy. 

For your power sets, you’ll be using a moderately heavy weight (65-70% of your one-rep 

max) with low reps, focusing on speed. 

For strength, you will be using a heavy weight (80-85% of one-rep max) for low reps, 

focusing on strength. 

For hypertrophy, you’ll again be using a moderately heavy weight, but this time for 

higher reps. 

Here is an example: 

Power days – 5x3 at 70% of 1RM 

Strength days – 4x4 at 85% of 1RM 

Hypertrophy days – 3x10 at 65-70% of 1RM 

Here is how the program can be set up: 

Monday – Deadlift (power), Bench Press (strength), Squat (hypertrophy)

Tuesday – Off 

Wednesday – Bench Press (power), Squat (strength), Deadlift (hyprtrophy) 

Thursday – Off 

Friday – Squat (power), Deadlift (strength), Bench Press (hypertrophy) 

Saturday – Off/Accessory 

Sunday – Off 

Accessory work is allowed with DUP, but not required. It’s really up to you. If 

you’re going to have an accessory day, I would suggest doing five or six 

exercises that support your primary movements. Something like: 

Deadifts – Romanian Deadlifts/Pull-Ups/Barbell Rows 

Squats – Goblet Squats/Leg Presses/Glute Bridge 

Bench Press – Push-Ups/Seated Shoulder Press/Floor press

Progression 

When it comes to seeing gains, progression is key. The best way to progress with DUP 

is to either add weight every week or increase the amount of sets and reps on a weekly 

basis. 

For adding weight, your goal should be to increase the load by five pounds each week 

on your strength and hypertrophy sets, while keeping your power sets the same and just 

focusing on speed or adding an extra set. 

When it comes to adding sets and reps, focus on trying to add one additional rep each 

week during your strength work, while adding an additional set during your power and 

hypertrophy work. 

Regardless of which progression method you choose, you don’t want to do DUP for 

longer than a four to six-week cycle without taking a one-week break in between. You 

can keep the exercises, sets, and reps the same during these "de-load" weeks, but you 

should reduce the loads by 50%. This helps facilitate recovery while preventing burnout. 

It would also be beneficial to switch your exercises up with each DUP cycle so you can 

target other movement patterns and muscle groups. 

When used correctly, DUP is a fantastic way to add strength quickly. While it is a bit 

more of an advanced strategy, if you have experience with the basic compound 

exercises, it can help you set new PRs and take your gains to the next level.

Best Training Methods For Muscle Growth: 

Bodybuilders, athletes and regular Joes alike have built impressive physiques using a 

diverse range of workout systems. The only common ground they share is: lifting 

weights, working hard and being consistent. 

That said, there are basic recommendations that are well supported, both scientifically 

and anecdotally. Low rep sets (1-5 reps) are best for building strength, higher-rep sets 

(15-20) are more efficient to increase muscular endurance. The best “zone” for 

hypertrophy (muscle growth) seems to be in the 8-12 rep range. 

But before you toss every workout plan that doesn’t stick to that narrow range, take 

heed: Recent research has demonstrated that muscles can grow across a very broad 

rep range. Which explains why my three favorite set and rep schemes are so different 

from that classic approach yet still work so well. 

8 x 8 

This is a variation of the classic 5 x 5 method — arguably the oldest training method of 

them all. And like most things that have stood the test of time, it simply works: five sets 

of five reps at 75-80% of your 1-rep maximum (1RM) would pack muscle onto a canary. 

However, for pure size gains, the 8 x 8 scheme is even better. Popularized by iron guru 

Vince Gironda, this method focuses on training density rather than load. 

To perform eight sets of eight reps, use a weight that you could do 12 reps with (roughly 

60% of your 1RM). The kicker is that you must complete all eight sets before you can 

increase the weight. Oh, and you can’t rest much – only 30 seconds between sets. 

It's not easy, to put it mildly. You’ll quickly overextend the rest interval if you don’t keep 

your eyes focused on your stopwatch. But the pump it delivers? Yikes. Talk about 

metabolic stress. And as some Governor named Schwarzenegger once said, “Da pump 

equals growth.” I love this method with smaller exercises like barbell curls and lateral 

raises.

Pyramid Training 

Pyramids have been around for as long as, well, the pyramids. There are different 

versions of pyramid sets. 

Ascending Pyramids: Increase the weight with each set while you decrease the amount 

of reps. 

Set 1: 12-15 reps 

Set 2: 10-12 reps 

Set 3: 8-10 reps 


By starting light and adding weight with each set, you’re well warmed-up before you get 

to the heavier weights. So it’s a safe way to train. Increasing the load with each set, 

called “ramping,” also wakes up your nervous system so it can assist with the heavier 

loads. This is a great system for getting stronger. 

Descending Pyramids: Decrease the weight with each set as you increase the 

amount of reps. 

A drawback with ascending pyramids is you only do one “all out” set. But for maximum 

hypertrophy, working until failure is a powerful tool. As such, you may want to keep your 

muscles near failure for longer to elicit the greatest growth response. Enter the 

descending pyramid.



Set 3: 10-12 reps 

Set 4: 12-15 reps 

Start off with your heaviest weight for a few reps (after warming up, of course), and then 

decrease the weight and do more reps with each successive set. Since each set is taken 

to failure (or close to it), this scheme is best suited for pure hypertrophy — with strength 

gains coming as a close second. 

Want the best of both worlds? Well, I have a pyramid for you. It’s called the 

triangle pyramid. 

With triangles, the weight is increased with each set until reaching your heaviest one. 

From there, you follow a descending pyramid scheme using progressively lighter weights 

while doing more reps — with these sets taken closer to muscular failure, and the last 

set taken to total failure. 

Triangle Pyramids: Combines both ascending and descending pyramids. 

Set 1: 12-15 reps 

Set 2: 10-12 rep 

Set 3: 8-10 reps



Set 6: 10-12 reps 

Set 7: Total failure 

While it's a whole lot of sets, triangle pyramids are tough to beat when it comes to 

increasing muscle size. 

8 x 3 

Speaking of a lot of sets, this bad boy is one of my favorites — even though the amount 

of reps is lower than the typical 8-12 rep “hypertrophy zone.” 

This scheme calls for using 80-85% of your 1RM — or roughly the weight you could lift 

for five perfect reps, and performing eight sets of three reps. 

How can you grow using such low reps? For one, the heavy loads preferentially recruit 

the fast-twitch muscle fibers, which have greater growth potential compared to the slowtwitch 

fibers (which don’t really “kick in” until the reps get higher). 

And two: Volume, baby! Doing so many sets (eight) makes up for the comparatively low 

amount of reps. And that’s eight sets of quality, heavy work.

Just be careful not to overshoot your weights (sets 1-5 should be quite easy) and use 

impeccable form. Once you can do all eight sets for three perfect reps, increase the load 

by 2.5-5% for your next workout. 

This kind of work is best used with big, compound exercises like bench presses, pullups, 

squats, and deadlifts. 

Picking your favorite set and rep system? C’mon, that’s like picking your favorite child. 

But there are certainly strategies that have stood the test of time. These three methods 

have been getting dudes big for many years and aren’t going anywhere anytime soon. 

Pick one and give it a serious six-week run.

Men’s Summer Fashion – Latest Trends in 2018 

Summer and fashion don’t always go hand in hand for men. Looking good comes easy 

when the temperatures drop. You can let your inner lumberjack shine, and chances are 

you’ll look fine. But Summer… that’s a different monster. 

Off the top of the head, you probably associate Summer styles with the preppy look: pink 

shorts, polos, Topsiders. And while they definitely have the spirit of comfort down, 

preppy does not have a monopoly on warm looks. Whether you want edgy, athletic, 

rugged, or anything in between, this is the Summer to step it up and make it happen. 

Men’s Summer Style Essentials 

The Shorts 

The preppy style has enjoyed a high fasshion renaissance in past years, which means 

chino shorts have taken a bold turn. 

Pastels are hot, but if you want to steer away from a fratty look, change up your colors. 

Khaki is a neutral option, but you don’t have to play it safe. Black or navy shorts can add 

new life to your wardrobe. 

A pair of athletic shorts, be it mesh or sweat, is an easy option when the situation is 

casual. Athleisure is a legitimate fashion cornerstone these days, so don’t feel like they 

can only be worn with tees and tanks.

Branch out and try to work them into your social attire. As with all shorts, avoid overly 

baggy and long choices. You don’t want to look you hopped out of your dad’s 70s 

basketball photos, but just above the knee is always a solid bet. 

The third option is a little more controversial: Denim Shorts.

Don’t fall into the John Cena trap. If you must wear jorts, make a well fitting pair of 

cutoffs. For length, don’t go overboard in either direction, and most importantly, don’t 

think they go with every outfit. 

Jorts are a casual look that can be dressed up with a nice shirt, but don’t think you can 

show up to your boss’s barbeque in those bad boys. 

Shorts Buyer’s Guide 

$: Volcom – Men’s Chino Shorts 

$: H&M – Knee Length Shorts 

$: AllSaints – Cobalt Chino Shorts 

$: Bonobos: – Parker Shorts 

$: UNIQLO – Men’s Easy Shorts

The Shirts 

Summer shirts can be a dangerous game. It’s hot. Keep it light. 

Invest in some t-shirts with a little more substance than a 5-pack of Fruit of the Loom. 

Keep the designs simple. No Ed Hardy. No graphic tees with awful jokes. 

Our pick: Striped Tee’s fits the bill perfectly. 

If the situation calls for something with a little class, you have three options: polos, long 

sleeve button ups, and short sleeve button ups. 

As for polos, they work well with chino shorts, but you will be encroaching on preppy, 

which is not a bad thing. If that style is out for you, play it down with neutral colors, a 

tailored fit, and a pair of jeans.

For button ups, keep the heat in mind. Go for a light weight linen for long sleeves. 

Plain light colored shirts are always an easy find, but if you can find plaid that won’t give 

you a heat stroke, indulge in some patterns. Plain colors are staples for a reason, but 

don’t get boring. 

For short sleeves, the same rules apply. Keep it light. Keep it breezy. 

Patterned short sleeves are very in fashion right now, so get creative. Things to avoid 

are bowling shirts and Hawaiian shirts. If you’re not a Weekend Dad, don’t dress like 

one. But remember, “no Hawaiian” definitely does not mean “no floral.”

Shirts Buyer’s Guide 

$: UNIQLO – Supima Cotton Striped T-Shirt 

$: Ralph Lauren – Polo 

$: Mark & Spencer London – Pure Cotton Polo (Plain) 

$: H&M – Stretch Shirt Slim fit 

$: Bonobos – Floral Shirt 

$: RSVLTS – Bomb Pops & Freedom Patterned Button Up

The Pants 

Discussing pants in a summer fashion article might seem silly. Once it hits about 80 

degrees, shorts are acceptable (and expected) in almost every situation. But you may 

find yourself slipping on some jeans this July. 

Put your dark wash indigos away till fall, and try out some lighter shades. Avoid “true 

blue” and anything acid wash, but otherwise feel free to experiment on that end of the 

spectrum. 

If a bold choice like that is not up your alley, go with black. Although it seems 

counterproductive, black jeans will always look good.

Chinos are a different story. The lightweight material was made for warm weather. 

There’s no reason to be too bold with your colors, but don’t get stuck in a khaki rut. 

Olive, gray, blue, and pretty much anything non-florescent is up for grabs. 

Pants Buyer’s Guide 

$: UNIQLO – Slim Fit Chino Front Pants 

$: H&M – Skinny Fit Chinos 

$: AllSaints – Men’s Park Chino 

The Shoes 

You have a lot of options in terms of footwear. Summer shoes like vans or boat shoes 

can go with just about anything. Keep your Vans’ colors subtle this season. White is 

always appropriate, while still giving a bit of a pop.

That doesn’t mean your sneakers should be boring – black and white are easy colors 

that work, but a sleek pair of low profile sneakers in any colorway can work and when 

done right add an amazing pop to any summer outfit. 

Our Favorite: White Leather Sneakers are a winner for this summer. Versatile enough 

to work with any summer outfit.

minsookr 

Socks either need to be no-show or mid-calf. Socks can be worn proudly this summer. 

Expect to see plenty of Black or white mid-calves, but gray is also an acceptable option. 

Shoes Buyer’s Guide 

$: Adidas – Gazelle 

$: Vans – Old Skool 

$: Converse – Chuck Taylor Low 

$: Adidas – Stan Smith 

$: Sperry – Top-Sider 

Outerwear and Accessories 

I’m including outerwear with accessories because that’s what they are in the warmer 

months. 

Keep something lightweight on hand for when the sun drops. You’re not going to be 

wearing it all day, so pick something that can go with almost any outfit you own.

Bomber jackets are still all the rage, so if you can find one thin enough, pick one up in 

something neutral, like cream. Unlined denim jackets are also a great option. Same color 

rules apply as with jeans. $ – Levi’s Denim Jacket // Topman Cream Bomber 

As for other accessories, keep it practical. Sunglasses are must-haves. Invest in a 

quality pair.

$ – Oliver Peoples Hassett 52 

As for hats, they’re are getting more relaxed. Retire your flat brims for something you 

might actually wear to a baseball game. 

$ – Relaxed Fit Baseball Cap 

Lastly, find a comfortable watch. Metal, leather, and rubber are all going to be too heavy. 

The Timex Weekender, with its canvas strap, is a safe bet. Like any article you might 

wear this summer, material is the key. 

When it comes to Summer fashion, don’t sweat it. Keep it lightweight and functional, but 

don’t sacrifice aesthetic. It’s the perfect time to experiment, because many of your peers 

probably aren’t going to bother trying. Hit June in

Best Men’s Colognes (June. 2018)

This guide has been recently updated to keep you smelling fresh for 2018! 

The world of men’s fragrances can be complicated. The same fragrance can smell 

completely different on 2 different people. 

When you’re buying a perfume or cologne, several factors are taken into account with 

how the scent will mix in with your natural smell and hopefully produce something that 

smells good. 

Factors such as the natural smell of your skin, your age, your diet, your body chemistry – 

even your stress levels and the medications you take can alter the way a fragrance 

smells on you. 

Not to mention women literally can determine a man’s attractiveness by his scent. 

Similarly, some fragrances can last for hours on end for certain people and at the same 

time last a very short while on others – depending on things such as the dryness or 

oiliness of your skin.

We’ve tried to take into account many things – such as budget options, the time of year 

to use the fragrance and how powerful and lasting the fragrance can potentially be. 

With all that in mind, here’s our list of the best men’s fragrances that will hopefully have 

you smelling like a million bucks. 

$: Nautica Voyage By Nautica For Men 

Originally created by Maurice Roucel, perhaps one of the top fragrance makers in the 

world – his stuff usually costs $300+ a bottle. 

Nautica Voyage is one of the best daily fragrance for men, It’s very light and airy, like 

coming out of the shower and laying out on the beach. 

At the same time it also has a distinctive masculine scent to give it just the proper 

amount of punch. 

It’s not overpowering or offensive in any shape or form, you can wear it to work, school 

or any social function you can think of. The perfect daily wear cologne.

$: Essential by Lacoste 

This is perhaps one of the best summer fragrances I’ve ever used. It has all the things 

you want in a summer cologne, a citrus smell that’s very fresh and light. 

The fragrance itself is not overpowering at all, perhaps even a little under-powering 

which would be the only fault of this fragrance. 

You will need to spray more than a few times to get a long lasting scent. Overall, an 

amazing day-time fragrance especially during the scorching heat.

$: Kenneth Cole Reaction by Kenneth Cole For Men 

Reaction is my favorite lesser known fragrance. I’ve rarely met people that own it even 

though it’s perhaps the most underrated cologne on the market. 

The awesome thing is – this is the best budget fragrance for men. The price is very 

reasonable for the quality you’re getting. 

The scent is fruity and playful, think fresh green apples – it dries down to a fresh herbal 

smell that’s simply amazing. 

Highly recommended if you’re looking for a cheaper option for daily use.

$: Virgin Island Water by CREED 

If you got a lot of money to spend and are looking for the best beach fragrance of all 

time, there is no other option than Virgin Island Water by Creed Aventus. 

This is the holy grail of summer beach, tropical, exotic scents. 

Some call it the best summer fragrance they’ve ever used – from the scent itself, to 

how long lasting it is and how perfectly it projects, it gets a 10 in every category.

$: La Nuit De L’homme by Yves Saint Laurent 

Though it’s gone through many reformulation, YSL La Nuit remains for me the best 

evening fragrance for men. 

The sophisticated, fresh and masculine scent it produces blends perfectly together. 

Many people have described this scent as simply ‘intoxicating’. 

Love using this fragrance for late night party’s, clubbing, going to restaurants, etc. 

The perfect cologne for social events.

This fragrance is all about versatility. 

$: Individuel Eau de Toilette by MONTBLANC 

A great budget option that rivals the performance of fragrances in the $250+ range. 

If you’re looking for the best long lasting men’s fragrance, that doesn’t cost an arm 

and a leg, you want Mont Blanc Individuel. 

The scent is simply everything you want in a daily use, versatile fragrance – fresh, floral, 

clean and airy. 

A great cologne for any occasion, any outing and any season.

$: Le Male Eau Fraiche Popeye Eau De Toilette by Jean Paul Gaultier 

A great option for a spring / summer fragrance. 

It’s fresh, it’s minty, the bottle is cool as heck – what’s not to love. 

The performance is up to par, and you’d be hard pressed finding a better quality cologne 

in this price range. 

The projection is not overbearing, it’s PERFECT as a close encounters fragrance. Think 

hugging or being near someone.

$: Invictus Aqua by Paco Rabanne 

If you’re looking for a unique men’s fragrance that not many people own – you want this. 

It has a very fresh scent, and the best part – it lasts for up to 10 hours. 

This is perhaps the longest lasting summer fragrance I’ve owned, and it lives up to the 

hype. 

The scent is a quintessential summer scent – cool and fresh. The performance is the 

main selling point of this cologne.

$: Valentino Uomo Intense by Valentino 

One word to describe this fragrance – Powerful. 

As the name suggests, it’s very intense, so one or two sprays is plenty to last and project 

for a very long time. 

The smell is very vanilla – this combined with how powerful it is makes it perfect for the 

winter time. 

This is simply a very enchanting cologne. If you want to get noticed, I’d recommend it 

highly.

The 7 Best Eye creams in 2018 

We could all probably stand to up our skincare game. We know about face washes, 

exfoliators, and moisturizers, but what do we do for the sensitive skin beneath our eyes? 

There’s an easy answer: Eye cream. But just like every other skin product, it seems like 

there are a million different skin types. How do you decide what to pick? 

Fortunately, eye cream doesn’t really need to be as complicated as it seems. In reality, 

unless you have a very specific issue, most normal moisturizers will do. 

However, if you DO have especially dry skin around your eyes, sensitive skin, wrinklies, 

dark circles, or puffy under eyes you would like to get rid of, then investing in eye cream 

is important. 

We’ve put together a list of some of our favorites to help you through this difficult 

decision. Up your eye game with some of these amazing products. 

Yes To Blueberries Age Refresh Eye Firming Treatment 

First and foremost, this is a great budget option. For under $8 on amazon, you can get 

some great eye care without draining your wallet, and trust us, that can be hard to find. 

As far as skin concerns go, this is great for wrinkle prone eyes. Sure, there are more 

high-end options that make bold promises about wrinkles, but we can’t all blow $30+ on 

a tiny container of eye cream.

If you have especially dry skin, this might not be intense enough for you. However, when 

used in combination with a quality moisturizer, this might be just the eye boost you need. 

Bottomline: If you need a little extra kick in the eyebags, but don’t want to drop too much 

cash, this is your best bet. 

Buy it on Amazon 

Tarte Maracuja C-Brighter Eye Treatment 

Next, let’s kick up the price a little. 

Tarte is a staple brand in the makeup world, which is why your best bet to find this is at 

stores like Sephora. With that in mind, you KNOW this is going to be some serious 

skincare. No one takes it more seriously than makeup artists. 

This cream is best for folks with sensitive skin. Whether sun sensitive, or chemically 

sensitive, this is a gentle eye cream with intense effects. It’s also great from crows feet 

and fine lines. 

Bottomline: This is a great all around eye cream. It’s a bit more of an investment than 

Yes To option, but it’s definitely worth the price. 

Buy it on Amazon

Kate Somerville Age Arrest Eye Cream 

Now we’re getting into the very high end skin products. 

This cream from Kate Somerville is certainly going to price a lot of customers out. But 

unfortunately, you usually get what you pay for, and that’s no different when it comes to 

skincare. 

As the name implies, this is the perfect cream for wrinkles, crows feet, or any other signs 

of aging. However, the main intention of this product is skin firming. If you have a little 

sag under the eyes, this is your cream. 

Bottomline: This may be a little overpriced, but the technology in this product makes it 

worth a small fortune. If you have some serious baggage under your eyes, this is your 

best option, even if the price tag makes you a little nauseous. 

Buy it on Amazon

Kiehl’s Creamy Eye Treatment with Avocado 

To put it bluntly, this is a HEAVY eye cream. You’re not going to want to wear this cream 

around during the day. You’ll look a little greasy, and no one wants greasy eyelids. 

However, if you have some serious drying issues, this is a great night cream. Throw it on 

if you’re constantly straining your eyes during the day. Many customers with computer 

heavy job find this to be the perfect cream for after a long day of staring at screens. 

The key ingredients here are avocado oil (obviously), beta-carotene, and shea butter. 

Bottomline: For some serious moisturizing, without the high price of the Kate 

Somerville,this is a great option. Just make sure you have another option for your early 

morning eye treatment. 

Buy it on Amazon

Avon Anew Clinical Thermafirm 

For drooping eyes that need some some serious firming action, you need to take some 

drastic measures. Luckily, this “drastic measure” is only going to cost you about $20. But 

don’t let the price fool you. This is a high quality product. 

The reason that it’s so cheap (compared to other eye creams) is because it’s not 

exclusively an eye cream. For whatever reason, the smaller area a product is meant to 

cover, the more expensive it is. While $20 is a mid range moisturizer, it’s pretty cheap for 

eye cream. 

Bottomline: This is an inexpensive product with some serious firming qualities to it. If 

you’re worried about lines, sagging, or other aging signs, this is a great budget option. 

Buy it on Amazon

Farmacy Dew It All Total Eye Cream with Echinacea GreenEnvy 

Next we have another all around product. It’s great for any skin type, but it is especially 

effective on dark circles. While all eye creams should have some effect on signs of 

aging, that’s not explicitly what this product is for. 

The special Echinacea GreenEnvy is a blend that contains cichoric acid that promotes 

collagen. That means you’ll get some firming and toning, promoting overall healthy eye 

skin. 

Bottomline: This is a great all around eye cream. Unless you have a very serious issue 

you need to target, this is the cream for you. 

Buy it on Amazon

Clinique Repair Anti-Gravity Eye Cream 

This cream is a an anti-aging powerhouse. From wrinkles to dark circles to sagging eye 

skin, this is the cream to fix your problems. It’s deep moisturizing, meant to get in there 

to regenerate, firm, and repair. 

This may be a little pricey for some consumers, but trust that it’s worth every penny. 

You’ll see just how quickly it fixes your wrinkles and fine lines quick. 

Bottomline: This is a perfect option if you’re worried about signs of aging

The Best Facial Moisturizers (2018)

Ask any skin care guru what the number one most important products for your face are, 

and they’ll probably all tell you the same thing: facial moisturizers. 

Throughout the day, our skin is zapped of it’s moisture, leaving us looking dry and 

haggard. Every time you shower, shave, or even just step out into the cold winter air, 

you’re doing a little bit of damage. Fortunately, moisturizers can fix this fairly quickly and 

provide you with the protection your skin needs. 

But not all skin is the same. Some people have oily skin. Some people have acne 

prone skin. Some people have sensitive skin, and don’t like to to put a ton of product 

on. 

Do these people really need to be throwing more moisture on their face? Short answer, 

yes. However, it’s important that you understand your skin type before investing 

Since skincare isn’t a one size fits all situation, we decided to break down a list of our 

favorites for every skin type. 

Whether sensitive, normal, dry, oily, acne-prone, or some combination of any of these, 

we’ve got you covered. 

If you want to keep your skin looking beautiful for years to come, it’s important to choose 

the right products. Start a skincare regimen today that caters to your needs. 

Moisturizers For Dry Skin 

If you have especially dry skin, chances are you know it. Your face feels like it’s going to 

crack after a shower. Winter is your enemy. That just means you need to invest in a 

strong facial moisturizers. The light options we’ve covered, except the ones described as 

too heavy for day use, are not an option for you. Here are some heavy hitters to keep 

your face look luscious.

Eucerin Dry Skin Replenishing Cream With 5% Urea – Let’s say you have very dry 

skin, are prone to acne, AND are so cheap that the more expensive options at Sephora 

made you sick. This cream is for you. The company targets this towards “Very Dry 

Rough Skin,” so if you feel like a snake face in the winter, this is for you. In addition, it 

won’t make you break out. Keep your skin fresh and glowing without the acne. It’s a 

perfect night and day cream, so use it liberally. 

Clinique Moisture Surge Intense Skin Fortifying Hydrator – This next model is NOT 

for the penny pinchers. However, if you’re in the need for some intense repair, this is one 

of your best bets. We’re talking flakey skin, winter winds whipping dry. If you’re only on 

the moderate side, this is not for you. But if you feel like your face is going to fall off 

when you walk outside, invest in this option from Clinique. 

Moisturizers For Normal Skin 

Let’s start with the basics. If your skin doesn’t really fall into a specific problem category, 

consider it simply “normal.” It doesn’t get too dry, or to oily, and you’re not to concerned 

with acne. So you need facial moisturizers that don’t try to push your skin too far in either 

direction. 

Clinique Dramatically Different Moisturizing Gel – The Dramatically Different line is a 

very popular one, but users often find the lotion formula to be a bit too greasy. The gel, 

on the other hand, is lightweight enough for those with normal skin. If you are prone to 

acne, this is not the choice for you.

Astral Moisturizing Cream – This face and body moisturizer from Astral is decent for 

those that may be a little acne prone, especially hormonal, but it’s more suited for normal 

skin. Despite it’s label as face and body, you might find it a bit to expensive to go all 

over. Invest in facial moisturizers, but you can afford to be thrifty on your body. Users 

also suggest using this only as a night moisturizer, as it might make you look a bit oily. 

Moisturizers For Sensitive Skin 

If you find that many moisturizers leave your skin red and irritated, you may fall under 

sensitive skin. Often other problems go along with sensitive skin, so many facial 

moisturizers in this category can pull double duty. Keep in mind any other problems that 

you may have. If you’re acne prone as well, one that clogs your pores is a no-no. 

First Aid Beauty Ultra Repair Cream – This product is really a well-rounded cream. It’s 

suitable for sensitive, acne prone, oily, AND dehydrated. You’re not going to find many 

that works for just about everything. This is especially useful if your sensitivity comes 

from eczema. Some users have said that it can be a little rich, so they prefer it only as a 

night cream. If you find that to be a case, pair it up with a lighter option for the mornings.

Stratia Liquid Gold – If you’re looking for a later moisturizer, or if you have rosacea 

prone skin, this is a top choice. It’s perfect for sensitive skin, without the richness of the 

Ultra Repair Cream. It’s a spray on moisturizer, which may make application easier for 

some. However, if you like more control, this might not be for you. The company states 

that if you have very pale skin, you may notice an orange tint. That will go away, but it 

may be best to just use before bed. For darker skin tones, alternate this with heavier 

creams, or use it alone. 

Moisturizers For Oily Skin 

If your face starts feeling like a butter factory halfway through the day, you need a 

moisturizer that can deal with that. Chances are, you are also fairly acne prone, but 

regardless, this is perfect for folks who can’t afford to add any extra oil to their face. 

Olay Moisturizing Lotion Sensitive Skin – Yes, this is marketed as an option for those 

with sensitive skin, but problem skins tend to have many different problems. This 

moisturizer works great for a bunch of different issues. If you use too much, since this

isn’t technically for oily skin, you may get a bit of a sheen, but a little goes a long way. 

Keep it light, and you’ll have beautiful, healthy skin. 

Moisturizers For Combination Skin 

If you have a little bit of both oil and dryness, you fall into combination skin. It can get a 

little difficult to deal with, as a cream may help one, and worsen the other. 

Cerave Facial Moisturizing Lotion PM – Since this is technically a night lotion, some 

may find it to be a little too heavy. However, it’s perfect for those that can’t quite strike a 

balance between dry and oily. It’s been praised for it’s quick absorption, which is 

important for avoiding a sheen. Whether you use it as intended, or for both morning and 

night, this is a great choice for combination skin. 

Neutrogena Hydro Boost Gel – If you have combination skin with certain patches of 

intense dehydration, this is your go to. This gel delivers some serious hydration without 

adding to your oils. It’s fast absorbing, and while we can’t fully trust a manufacturer’s 

word, it claims to be effective for up to 48 hours. That’s perfect if you can’t afford to keep 

throwing lotion on your oily spots.

Moisturizers For Acne Prone Skin 

If you have severe acne problems, facial moisturizers are your worst enemy. They’ll 

break you out, and make the whole situation worse. However, you can’t avoid them 

completely. You just have to be careful about what you choose. Keep your skin healthy 

without adding more breakouts. 

Alaffia Balancing Day Cream – If you’re looking for a simple, all-natural moisturizer, 

this is it. It’s a great lightweight option for people worried about breakouts. The one 

downside is that it does have a bit of a scent. Even though it is day cream, if smell is an 

issue, consider it for your PM option. 

Carley’s Clear & Smooth Daytime Moisturizer for Acne Prone Skin – Next we have 

an option made specifically for your skin. If you’re prone to acne, sometimes adding 

extra chemicals is the worst thing you can do. This all natural option is the perfect, nongreasy 

option for your skin. 

Staying moisturized is important, but individualization is even more so. Don’t settle for a 

cookie cutter skin routine. Don’t settle for cookie cutter skin.

The Secret To Curing Chronic 

Chapped Lips

Dry skin is easy enough to deal with – just use the best moisturizer you can find, but how 

do you deal with chapped lips that stay dry and peel off NO MATTER HOW MUCH 

CHAPSTICK YOU USE? 

I tried everything under the sun to cure my chronic chapped lips. I’ve bought and 

tested every brand of chap stick from the drug store, I started drinking tons of water and 

doing weird DIY recipes that involved house hold items. Nothing worked. 

Until I found the holy grail of chapped lip products. 

Neosporin Lip Health 

Basically, you apply this creamy product to your lips before you go to bed. 

When you wake up, you wash it off and remove any excess. 

BAM. Perfectly non-chapped lips for days on end. 

If you feel your lips getting dry again, just apply overnight and enjoy another few days of 

silky smooth lips. 

Seriously, this is not a paid review or a promotion of any kind, this is literally the only 

thing that has worked for my chronically chapped lips. Give it a try and tell me how it 

works for you.

Skincare Guide For Men With 

Sensitive Skin

I’ve spent hundreds of dollars trying out products from a variety of brands. 

I’ve tried products from the local drug store to luxury products from upscale stores like 

Sephora. 

I’ve also had a years long battle with trying to get a proper shave without my neck 

looking like a minefield. 

So if you have a problem finding the proper skincare routine and getting a perfect shave 

without ingrown hairs on your neck, read on, I WILL help you find a solution. 

1. Give up on ‘Exfoliation’ 

You might’ve heard of exfoliators, and even tried one yourself. If you have super 

sensitive skin like me, you don’t need to use ’em. If you shave your face like most dudes, 

you’re not going to get a better exfoliation than a razor to the face. (on the topic of 

razors, try out wetshaving, it’s a lifesaver for guys with sensitive skin) 

2. Buy a simple facial cleanser 

No fancy colors or scents. Just a simple, creamy, cleanser to watch your face with. No 

special ingredients like baking soda. My two favorites that have absolutely worked 

wonders for me are: 

a) Nivea Men’s Sensitive Skin Facial Cleanser 

b) Jackblack Daily Facial Cleanser 

TIP: If your skin gets ‘dry’ and/or ‘tight’ after using a cleanser, drop it. I used to think this 

was a sign that the cleanser was working but it just means your skin is not reacting well 

to it. 

3. Get a strong and simple moisturizer 

Once again you want something that’s easy and simple without too many unwanted 

ingredients. No fragrance, with SPF, absorbs easily and doesn’t leave your face greasy. 

The best moisturizer I’ve found for this is: 

a) Jackblack Moisturizer 

How To Get Rid of Razor Bumps On Your Neck 

This is a problem I’ve had forever. No matter how I shaved, what I used (a classic 

wetshaving razor) or a mach 3, or even an electric shaver, I’d end up with a minefield for 

a neck.

Here’s 3 steps to get rid of neck bumps forever: 

1. You NEED to let the hair on your neck grow out. 

What this does is help your neck recover from the ingrown hairs and bumps. It’s the 

bodys natural way of ‘rebooting’ the skin on the neck. Let it grow out until all the bumps 

are gone, this could take a few weeks. 

2. Use a preshave oil and hotwater to soften the face and facial hair 

This will help make the shaving process much smoother. 

3. Map your facial hair direction and shave ONLY WITH THE GRAIN 

Be mindful of the direction your facial hair is growing. It could be going up, down, 

sideways, in swirls, etc. Everyone’s facial hair is different, you might have hair growing 3 

different ways on your neck, take note of it! 

Hopefully this finally helps you fellow sensitive skin dudes out there!

Guide To Stop (Excessive) 

Armpit Sweat

Excessive sweating or hyperhidrosis is one of those problems that doesn’t seem like a 

big deal until you have to deal with it. 

Than it’s the most annoying problem in the world. 

I’ve had to deal with excessive armpit sweat pretty much my whole life and I just dealt 

with it. Switching shirts multiple times per day had basically become routine. Only 

wearing black was normal for me. 

I finally got fed up and started doing my research on how to get rid of excessive armpit 

sweating once and for all. Here’s what worked for me and some options you can try out. 

The Best Antiperspirants For Underarm Sweat 

1. Certain-Dri

2. SweatBlock 

3. ZeroSweat

4. Odaban 

There are some insanely powerful products on the market in 2018 that can put a stop to 

excessive sweating for days to weeks on end. 

Basically this is how to use them: 

1. Shave your armpit hair so you can apply the product to the skin. 

2. Make sure your armpits are clean before applying. Take a shower. 

3. Only apply product before going to bed. This is when your sweat glands are least 

active. Leave on until you wake up and shower in the morning. 

This will work for a majority of people and either minimizes by a lot or get rid of their 

excessive armpit sweating completely. 

Cons: 

Some people are very sensitive to the aluminium chloride (the main ingredient in these 

sweat blocking products). You may experience redness or a rash. Stop using and go to 

a doctor if that happens to you.

Sweat Proof Undershirts 

Another option you have when dealing with excessive underarm perspiration is to 

purchase an undershirt specifically made for people that suffer from hyperhidrosis. 

The Thompson Tee Sweat Proof Undershirt 

These undershirts have integrated sweat pads that will absorb your sweat throughout 

the day leaving whatever you wear over them completely dry. Pretty handy if you ask 

me. 

See a Doctor 

Many people that suffer from hyperhidrosis never take this option when it’s the 

most obvious one. 

They try so many products and solutions and give up when none of them work.This in 

my opinion is the option most likely to solve your problem with excessive sweating.

Your doctor will be able to provide you with several solutions, the most common being to 

prescribe clinical antiperspirants that you can’t but without a prescription. 

These are the grand daddy of sweat blockers and they will for sure help you out.

How To Get The Perfect Tan 

(Without Risking Skin Cancer)

For many men, tanned skin is sported with confidence and swagger, much like a badge 

of honor. And for good reason. For starters, it gives anyone (regardless of shape, age, or 

ethnicity) a healthy glow — as if you’ve exercised outdoors or spent a sun-soaked day 

on the beach. In addition, it lends guys with less-than-stellar summer bods a more toned 

and defined appearance. (It’s the equivalent of wearing head-to-toe black to slim down 

your appearance immediately.) 

While there’s seemingly endless pros to having tanned skin, achieving it naturally — or 

worse, under those relics of the past, tanning beds — is seriously risky business. In fact, 

according to a report released by the Skin Cancer Foundation last year, only 51 percent 

of American men admitted to using sunscreen in the past year. On top of that, a 

whopping 70 percent weren’t even aware of the tell tale signs of skin cancer. Then add 

the fact that skin cancer is now far and away the most common cancer in the country 

and you’ll get every reason not to bask in the sun’s rays in the name of looking good. 

Need we say more?

All this being said, tanning is one of the few things in life where we completely advocate 

faking it — with the help of self tanning products, that is. And this is where James Read, 

a professional spray tan artist and creator of an eponymous line of self tanning products, 

steps into the picture. 

Even as a young teenager, Read was smart enough to steer clear of the sun and create 

a healthy, sun-kissed look with tanning wipes. As he got older and started developing a 

celebrity cult following — Naomi Campbell, Rosie Huntington-Whiteley, Ellie Goulding, 

and Mariah Carey are just a few of his loyal fans — for his handiwork, he decided it was 

time to take all his passion and expertise and channel it into his very own brand. Above 

all, Read’s mission is to make self tanning at home easy, convenient, and most 

important, natural-looking. 

In fact, self tanning is considered a secret grooming weapon in the entertainment 

industry. (Unless someone is naturally blessed with deep, dark skin, the odds of him 

wearing a fake tan on the red carpet or in front of the camera are very, very high.) “Self 

tans look so natural now you would not guess someone is wearing a product,” says 

Read. “It's about someone saying you look well. Your tan should work as a background 

color, and work with your whole look, not overpower it.” 

But as with all matters related to grooming, there’s a right and wrong way to use self 

tanning products. So here, Read breaks down exactly what you need to do and use to 

get the healthiest, most natural-looking tan ever on your face and body – all in the 

comfort of your very own home.

For Your Face 

Tom Ford Exfoliating Energy Scrub 

Best For 

: Exfoliating 

Consider your skin like a canvas. Before applying any type of color — or in this case, 

self-tanner — you want it to be as smooth as possible. And why? Not only will a smooth 

surface ensure even application of product, it’ll also help the product penetrate deeper, 

for longer lasting results. Use a dab of this invigorating scrub — it’s fortified with crushed 

apricot seeds — to gently sweep away rough patches and dull flakes.

$48.00 at Nordstrom.com 

Pacific Shaving Company Single Use Shaving Cream Minis 

Best For 

: Shaving 

Unless you’re a dedicated beard or mustache wearer, now’s the time to shave off those 

whiskers to ensure your skin is as soft as possible. And these newly-launched, 

innovative single-use shaving creams couldn’t be any easier to use. Simply grab a pod, 

hold it under running water, and create a rich, emollient lather that’ll enable superior 

razor glide — so you’ll be comfortably free of nicks, burn, and bumps. 

$8.99 at Amazon.com

Pevonia Collagen Boost Face Balm For Him 

Best For 

: Moisturizing 

To keep your tan looking natural and even, regular moisturizing is a must. This 

lightweight, quick-absorbing formula was developed expressly for guys, and revitalizes 

even the most tired, worn out complexions with anti-aging antioxidants, collagen, and 

vitamins C & E. Use daily before application of self tanner, and especially after 

exfoliating and shaving. 

$74.00 at Ariva.com

James Read Tan H20 Tan Mist 

Best For 

: Self-Tanning 

This genius spray-on product, infused with skin-healthy rosewater, helps gradually build 

a believable glow. On cleansed and hydrated skin, simply spritz on generously and let 

dry. Over the next few days, you’ll see a realistic hint of bronzy color enhance your 

natural complexion. Read is a fan of this for so many reasons: “It doesn’t highlight 

pigmentation or block pores. It’s great for post shave, as it cools down skin. It dries 

instantly, and there’s no self-tan smell. And it’s enriched with vitamins and skinnourishing 

ingredients. What more can you ask for?” 

$23.00 at Amazon.com

For Your Body 

Anthony Blue Sea Kelp Body Scrub 

Best For 

: Exfoliation 

Just like your face, your body also needs a solid scrub down before self tanning. This 

formula features two physical exfoliants (natural sea salt and micro-sloughing beads) to 

buff away even the roughest areas (like your elbows, knees, hands, and feet). Slather on 

a generous amount in the shower two to three times weekly for the best results. 

$28.00 at Nordstrom.com

Kiehl’s Creme de Corps Light-Weight Body Lotion 

Best For 

: Moisturizing 

Again, your body needs daily hydration, just like your face. And this popular moisturizer 

ticks off all the guy-friendly boxes. It’s lightweight and doesn’t leave a greasy residue. 

There’s no strong scent to interfere with your favorite cologne. And a small dollop goes a 

long way. All you’ll be left with is with clean-feeling, baby soft skin. 

$25.00 at Nordstrom.com

James Read Tan Clear Bronzing Mist 

Best For 

: Self-Tanning 

When it comes to self-tanning for men’s bodies, Read recommends a clear (as opposed 

to tinted) product, because “a clear or translucent formula will stop the tan from clinging 

to hair.” Similar to his James Read Tan H20 Tan Mist, this product is a breeze to use. 

“Mist from the neck down, mapping your body in stages so you don't miss bits,” says 

Read. “Leave hands and feet until last and then lightly mist in downward strokes.” Don’t 

forget to moisturize regularly after this step. 

$38.00 at Amazon.com

Sex Tips:

Shortcut To Being Great In Bed 

12 

I'm convinced that the reason that so many people are sexually dissatisfied is that there 

is so much disinformation about what it takes to be a great lover. 

In fact, most people, both men, and women believe that there are one or maybe two 

things that, if they could have/do them, they'd be god's gift to the opposite sex. 

And what’s funny is… 

Most of the time, that "one thing" they think they need isn't 

even in the ballpark of what would make them "good in bed," and even further from the 

thing they need to become the kind of sexual partner that lovers adore and obsess over. 

Examples of what men think would make them great in bed: a bigger dick, six-pack abs, 

a secret trick for stimulating her G-spot, clitoris, and anus at the same time… 

Examples of what women think would make them great in bed: bigger breasts, six-pack 

abs, a secret trick for making her tongue spin around a man's penis at fantastic speed. 

Now, of course, there IS someone out there with a massive fetish for every one of these 

particular things, but for MOST of us, these things are hardly on the radar. Yes, they 

may be very nice little extras that we might undoubtedly enjoy, but we're not going to feel 

like we won the sexual jackpot because of any of these secondary qualities. 

On the other hand, there are real qualities, in both men and women, that will make them 

powerfully desirable and sexy, including things like passion, confidence, openness about 

what turns them on…

Today I want to share one cool shortcut that most men and women don’t even consider 

when it comes to pleasing their lover– and yet it’s so amazingly powerful, it’s such a 

huge turn on, and it’s so sexually rare, that if you do it, it will make sex with you an 

absolutely unforgettable experience. 

I call it a “shortcut” because anyone who’s willing, can do it right now, tonight, and it 

doesn’t take years of practice or exercises. 

I'm referring to "presence," and what I mean by that simple word is just the act of being 

physical, mentally, and emotionally engaged with your partner during sex. (And I'll tell 

you exactly how in just a moment). 

Now I said this was a shortcut because anyone can do it, and you can do it RIGHT 

NOW, or ANY time you are having sex with your partner… 

But I didn’t say it was EASY, and for most people, it’s not. In fact, most people are 

virtually never present during sex. 

But what does that mean? I mean, if you're having sex with someone, apparently you 

are physically in the same space with them, right? If the teacher called attendance in 

that bed, and she called your name, you'd say, "present!" 

And yet, while they are indeed in the room, most people are mentally and 

emotionally checked out. 

Where do they go? 

Mainly to one of 3 places: 

1) They are in fantasy, most frequently fantasizing about a different partner, more 

partners, a scene they saw on the internet, a situation they find sexy, or increasingly for 

men who watch too much porn, they fantasize about being home with their computer 

and watching other people have sex on the screen in order to get off. 

There is absolutely nothing wrong with fantasy. Fantasy is great! But it is NOT presence, 

and if you find that you can’t get aroused without it, you’ve got some work to do. 

2) They are absorbed in sensate focus, entirely focused on the feelings in their genitals 

and bodies. This is the recipe for good sex recommended by Masters and Johnson, and 

it's not too bad. Indeed, it can be very sensual, and it's a degree more present than 

being in fantasy, because at least you're in your body (which is in the actual room), and 

responding to what's happening instead of the movie in your mind. 

3) The third place that is far too common for people to be during sex is anxiety… the 

chattering voice in your head that says you’re not good enough, that you’re doing it 

wrong, that you won’t be able to stay hard, or won’t have an orgasm, or that you look

weird, smell weird, or that you don’t know whether or not your partner is enjoying it or 

faking it. 

This "chattering monkey mind" focus is the worst possible kind of sex, and it's at the 

cause of most sexual dissatisfaction. It's no fun for either of you, and it can shake your 

confidence inside and outside of the bedroom. 

So it turns out that being present is exceptionally challenging for most people. 

In fact, according to surveys, MOST people have NEVER had an orgasm while keeping 

their eyes open and looking into their lover’s eyes. 

For many other people who have fallen into a mental pattern or either fantasy or anxiety 

during sex, forcing their mind to do something other than that is challenging. 

If you own any of my programs, then you've heard me say many times that taking up 

meditation is a good idea, and this is one of the specific reasons why: Meditating is 

merely the practice of getting your mind to do what you want it to do instead of just 

running wild in its habitual patterns. 

Okay, so presence might be challenging, but it IS available to you right now, tonight, and 

if you're willing to give it a try, it's a great shortcut to being amazing in the sack. 

Here are three easy little tricks and tips for "how to" get yourself present with your 

lover… 

1) Focus on taste and smell. 

Taste and smell are the oldest senses. They developed long before more complicated 

things like touch and sound, and waaaaay before the super complex ability to see. Most 

single-celled animals can sense chemicals in their environment (which is what taste and 

smell is) and either move towards or away from them. 

Let yourself get absorbed in your lover's scent and taste, and you'll discover that you can 

become quickly engaged in being present with them. 

If you're a beginner at this presence thing, I suggest that you wait until you're already 

aroused, maybe even during intercourse, and then bring yourself powerfully into 

awareness of these first senses. 

Let yourself feel into the experience. With modern hygiene and deodorant, you may 

experience being unable to smell anything from your lover's skin. Stay with it. Taste. 

Tune in to what's more profound, underneath the smell of soap and laundry detergent. If 

you can, let it swoon you with pleasure.

And then continue making love to your partner while entirely sensually absorbed 

in that sense of them. 

2) Eye contact + emotion. 

Anytime during sex, from foreplay to oral to intercourse to climax, find your partner’s 

gaze and make eye contact. 

They may (probably) have their eyes closed. Gently invite or request that they look into 

your eyes… 

And then share the emotion you feel right at that moment. 

This could be a simple smile that says, “this is fun!” or it could be a sigh of sensual 

pleasure, it could be an aching gaze of pure love, a lip-bite of pure lust, or even a little 

laugh of feeling like a silly, naughty kid caught with your pants down. 

You can use words here to say what you feel, or just a sigh, sound, or facial expression. 

Just get your feeling across, and then continue or return to making love. 

Eye contact, and then share an emotion. See if you can feel your partner's emotion too. 

Let it pass between you as an instant, sexy communication. 

You don't have to hold it for the entire session. It might be a moment, a few seconds, or 

a big minute. You might find it threatening, beautiful, or hypnotic… but you'll have made 

real contact. 

3) Breath your lover 

This is one of my favorites. When you do it, it’s just so amazingly… present! 

Here’s how it’s done: 

When you are making love to your partner move your face right beside or in front of 

his/hers. The most natural place to transition to this is while kissing. (In fact, kissing is a 

great place to be present, but it's also easy to kiss while being in fantasy or sensate 

focus). 

Then, when your partner exhales, ***especially when he/she moans, gasps, or sighs 

with pleasure, inhale they exhale into your mouth. 

You don't have to have a seal around their face like a scuba mask, you can have your 

mouth against his/hers, or you can be several inches away, feel yourself "catching" your 

lovers breath and taking it in.

You'll begin by simply noticing when they are exhaling and catching it. Then you can 

intensify the game by feeling for when he/she is going to sigh or moan (or even scream 

out!) in pleasure and inhaling their passion into your body. 

This turns your focus powerfully onto being present with your lover's pleasure and 

creates an intense, passionate, and highly present feeling for both of you. 

You can also hold back your own (authentically felt) moan of pleasure until you see that 

your partner is about inhaling, hold your mouth close to his/hers, and breath your 

pleasure into their inhale. 

You’ll light up every cell of their body. 

IMPORTANT NOTE: 

You don't have to do ANY of these little tricks the entire time. In fact, it will likely become 

weird and self-conscious if you try to. This is just the sugar you put into the dough that 

turns it from plain bread into a delicious cake, or the spice that you add that turns bland, 

boiled food into a hot, exotic dish that your taste buds will never forget. 

And if you want a master tip for presence, then allow yourself to be sensitive to exactly 

how long you ought to continue any one of these techniques. Let the moment decision. 

Be present to when is the perfect time to transition into or out of any of these techniques. 

Once you are doing that, you are really, truly present with your lover. 

This indeed is a fantastic shortcut to being an entirely new experience for your partner 

during sex, because not .1% of people out there are even aware of a sexual presence, 

much less trying to make it happen. 

I would love to hear about your success stories, experiences (many people have 

experienced this during a “best sex of my life” experience, if even briefly– and elusively 

have not been able to re-experience it because they didn’t understand what it was that 

they were feeling), or of course any questions or comments below.

The Master Key To Sexual Tension 

43 

The mating dance of humans is a complex psycho-emotional game that determines who 

is going to mate with whom… and who isn't? 

Just like "the birds and the bees" (and all of the other sexually reproducing animals), 

there's a biological dance that we play out for partner selection, which creates attraction, 

sexual arousal, mating, and bonding. 

Most men don't understand that there is a dance happening at all. They don't even hear 

the music, much less know the steps. They are disconnected from their instincts by 

society, they have been un-trained by porn and a lack of role models to want what they 

want, and they leave it to luck (at best) and trickery (at worst) to get what they want. 

This cheats them out of a lot of fun, a lot of sex, happy and sexually charged long-term 

relationships, and self-esteem. 

The drumbeat that carries the rhythm for the mating dance is SEXUAL TENSION. 

And just like learning to dance, when you first start out, you step on your partner's toes a 

lot until you learn how to listen for the beat, and eventually keep time to that beat with 

your body. 

The energy of sexual tension is just like that. You have to listen for it, you have to allow 

yourself to FEEL it, and then you discover that "dancing" to it is not only as secure as 

moving your feet to the rhythm but that you don't have to be great at it to have fun with 

your partner. 

The #1 big killer for men when it comes to learning how to play with sexual tension and 

getting women attracted and sexually aroused (whether it’s that gorgeous woman that 

just walked past you in the produce section of Whole Foods or your wife while you’re 

cleaning the dinner dishes together in the kitchen)… is FEAR. 

Most men are quite uncomfortable with sexual tension, they don’t know what to do with 

it, they don’t know how to handle it, and so they fear it. And then, because they fear it, 

they find a way to GET RID OF IT. 

If the game of sexual tension was actual dancing, then when a beautiful, sexy woman 

comes dancing over, her hips swaying, her hair swinging, her chest heaving… most men 

freak out, grab the remote, and turn the music OFF… and then giggle sheepishly, having 

no idea what to do next. 

Men want pick-up lines precisely because they are so nervous when they feel the sexual 

tension in their body. They don't know how to relax and enjoy that tension. They don't 

know how to listen to it. They want something to cover it up with.

The classic way that men "turn off the music" and dump the sexual tension out of 

interaction is when they blurt out their attraction: 

"Wow, you are so beautiful! I saw you standing over there, and I just had to take a 

chance and come over and introduce myself!" 

It's a relief to get the sexual tension out of yourself that way and dump it into space 

between you, but it's disappointing for the woman because you just killed the game for 

her. 

Her sexual attractiveness (the way she looks, her body, her makeup, the clothing she is 

wearing, the way she is standing, her smile and laugh, her too-cool-for-school pout– 

EVERYTHING she is doing to show herself off) is like her pair of aces (or even the 

straight flush) that she is holding in her hand… 

And when you walk over and "call" her hand, and she has to drop the cards on the table, 

the game is over. And if you don't look like Orlando Bloom, then there's very little else for 

her to do but say, "thank you for the compliment," and go back to the conversation with 

her friends. 

Men also dump the sexual tension by just staring and then quickly looking down when 

she catches you staring. Ouch. Game over. 

Men also dump sexual tension by being loud and obnoxious. 

Here's a big one– men dump sexual tension by making jokes about it. The dirty joke is 

funny precisely because of our discomfort with sexual energy in front of others. 

And men dump sexual tension by merely chickening out and deciding not to go after her 

at all (disappointing, but also, whew, what a relief to get that uncomfortable sexual 

tension out of your body). 

And listen, man, I've done EVERY ONE of those things. 

By the way, all of these things exist in long-term romantic relationships too: 

Men dump the sexual tension by blurting (hey, are you in the mood to do it tonight?), by 

being obnoxious (are you going to go OUT looking like that?), by making jokes, by 

deciding to just not go for it because her rejection of his sexual advances hurts his 

feelings, etc. 

You surrender all of your power when you dump the sexual tension, AND all of her 

power too. You steal all of her fun, and play, and desire to bring her best to impress the 

man that she wants to win.

The master key to learning how to do this dance in a way that amps up sexual attraction 

and makes her start thinking about you as a possible mate is to learn how to contain 

(and enjoy) your sexual energy in the presence of a woman you are attracted to. 

Don't dump it, don't run from it, and don't try to suppress it, but allow yourself to 

feel it. 

Yes, your heart might be racing, you might feel a little squirt of adrenaline, maybe your 

palms get a little damp… and these things also happen during fear, so it's easy to 

associate it with discomfort… but notice that it's NOT discomforting necessarily. Use the 

old yoga trick of breathing slowly and deeply into your belly, and relax, and see if you 

can enjoy it. 

The good news is that if you say, "Hi, my name is Alex" (though I recommend using your 

name), and you LET YOURSELF FEEL THE SEXUAL TENSION without freaking out, 

without dropping eye contact to diffuse it, without nervously grinning and joking… then 

what happens is, she'll feel the sexual tension in her body too. 

Just relax and feel that interplay and see what she says. Listen and feel, and don't worry 

too much about what you say back. Just know if you can enjoy the wave without freaking 

out. 

Practice that and only that (with your romantic partner or with any woman you are 

interested in), and you will notice a significant shift in the way that women treat you. 

Once you can feel the sexual tension without dumping it, it's like being able to hear the 

beat of the music. Now you can start to dance. 

“Dancing,” in this case, is playing with the sexual tension and letting it build and fade, 

build and fade, and begin mastering that interplay. 

To mix in another metaphor, it's like feeling the tension in a fishing line– too much and 

the line will break, too little and the hook can come free, or the cord gets tangled. And 

just like that fishing line, you can become sensitive to the feeling of it. 

I just did a webinar for the men on "how women test men," and this fits right into that part 

of male/female interaction. Women test men when they feel sexual tension to see if he 

can hold the power of the emotion, to see if he is faking it or if he is capable of carrying 

the line with her. 

When you can, her attraction for you is immediate and automatic. Even if you're not her 

type, yet if she has good reason to decide not to act on it, she's going to feel it (just in 

the same way that you can't stop feeling sexual attraction for a woman that you're 

attracted to either).

Imagine you are ending the first date with a woman, and things went quite well. You walk 

her back to her door– and instead of diving in and trying to make out with her, or trying to 

get invited inside– you just give her one, gentle kiss and say with a knowing smile, "This 

was fun, maybe we'll do it again some time," and then leave. 

The magic of this is that the "maybe" will drive her sexual tension through the roof as 

she wonders whether or not you like her as much as she thought you did. She's going to 

be very eager to see you for that second date, and she’s going to have a ton of 

enjoyment, stewing in that sexual tension in between. 

Now importantly Christian came up with this little nugget because it’s something he did 

once spontaneously and it worked like crazy. 

But what I want you to get is not just that it worked like crazy, but why it came up 

spontaneously for him. 

And the reason is that he was having so much fun dancing with her sexual tension 

the whole night that it was the natural thing to do. He might have tried for sex… but at 

that moment, he was having so much fun with the tease and counter-tease, with the 

surfing of the sexual tension (he calls it "the romantic obsession plot"), that it was more a 

more evident and pleasurable choice at the moment to delay the sex, and keep the 

sexual tension going. 

I know Christian well, and though I never asked him about it, I'm confident that he didn't 

do it to be "manipulative," or something pre-meditated like that. He was having fun. And 

so was she. 

Getting back to that “master key” I was talking about: When you are attracted to a 

woman, and she’s just so beautiful and intimidating that you can’t contain yourself and 

stay cool, it is a reliable, biological sign to her that you probably aren't a suitable mate for 

her. So she passes you over. 

Some guys will try to fake disinterest and remain aloof and unimpressed, and of course, 

that can sometimes work as a "trick," but it's neither authentic nor reliable. In fact, it's 

okay to be impressed, to let her feel your attraction for her, AND remain able to function 

and deal with that sexual tension and emotional energy in your body. 

A woman doesn't want a man who is over-awed by her and can't manage to keep his 

shit together. That's how she feels when you start puffing up, bragging, complimenting 

too much, offering too much, trying to impress her, trying to play it too cold, or trying to 

suck up to win her favor.

Train yourself to enjoy the feeling of attraction, to become comfortable with the feelings 

of appeal, the butterflies– recognize the aliveness in those feelings, smile, and enjoy 

her company and the tension that lives and breaths and grows in the space between 

you. 

Don’t cheat her, or yourself, out of one of the great pleasures of being a human.

How To Make “Friends With Benefits” 

4 

The sexual landscape has gotten more interesting, more free, and more complicated, 

and there are more socially acceptable choices for having a sexual relationship than 

ever before. 

I currently know two "groups" who are living completely openly as "3 or more" 

relationships. One of them is a complex arrangement of 5 individuals, all of whom feel 

like "family" together, all have multiple lovers inside of the group (though not everyone is 

romantically/sexually attached to everyone else), and they are all in a committed 

relationship to the group… 

Openly and publicly… they do not hide their family of choice arrangements. 

On the other extreme, I have friends (both male and female) who have multiple "booty 

call" partners or "fuck buddies," but have no romantic or emotional commitments to 

anybody. 

(On a third extreme, of course, I know some voluntary celibates too, but this is a blog 

about sex after all). 

And, in case you're only interested in the old-fashioned "vanilla" relationship — 

committed to just one person (my personal favorite) — don't fret, because I don't think 

that's going to go away, and there are plenty of people from both sexes who are still 

interested in pursuing that particular kind of devotion. 

I meet a lot of both men and women who are interested in experimenting with having 

more sexual availability in their lives, especially when in between relationships, by 

cultivating “fuck buddies” and “friends with benefits”, but are frustrated by not knowing 

how to comfortably get into those kinds of relationships, or how to confidently ask for 

what they want. 

I got this question recently in an email from my reader Tony, which is the subject 

of this article… 

“Do you have any advice on moving a friendship into, for example, a friends with benefits 

situation? It seems hard to change your role with somebody once it’s established.” 

The reason that it SEEMS hard to change your role with somebody once it's established 

is that changing anything is always harder than leaving everything the way it is… doing 

something is harder than doing nothing. 

The real issues here are that you feel the sense of risk with someone you already know 

because there is the possibility of rejection, and that rejection is shared with a friend, and 

potentially if they are part of the rest of your social group, shared with them too.

And that feels like it could be humiliating. 

And the compounding issue is that she, also being a human, is probably too insecure 

about these issues, and has similar fears around having her sexuality rejected "publicly" 

inside of her social circle. 

The thing that could make this simple, however, is to understand that those fears are 

entirely delusional. Natural… but delusional. 

If you have a sincere belief that sex is fantastic and everyone ought to love it, and if you 

are confident that YOUR sexuality is natural, and an attractively masculine characteristic 

(or feminine characteristic, if you are a woman reading this), then it's easy and 

comfortable to talk about adding "benefits" or sex to the relationship — regardless of 

whether it's early or late in the friendship. 

If she (or he) rejects the idea, it's not embarrassing because if you're confident in your 

sexuality and believe it's right, ethical, and natural, then you don't require another 

person's external acceptance or validation to feel that. 

If you say, "I like pizza," and your friend says, "ew, I hate pizza," you don't feel 

embarrassed by that. Because you KNOW pizza is excellent! 

Of course, it may be disappointing, you wanted something and didn't get it, but it does 

not need to be humiliating or frightening or "hard." 

And once you understand and work towards achieving this mindset, it also becomes 

MUCH EASIER FOR YOUR FRIEND TO ACCEPT the offer and enjoy those benefits 

with you. 

The key here is that there is no way for her to “lose” with you. 

If she’s not interested in that sort of thing, it won’t cost her your attention, the enjoyment 

of your interactions, or anything else. You won’t be hurt, and you won’t act weird, and 

the pressure is off. 

That makes it super comfortable for her to think about it, and not have to make a snap 

decision or feel threatened by the situation. 

Just like asking if someone if they want pizza generally doesn’t end a conversation if 

they don’t. 

The same thing is exact of women you'd like to have benefits with. 

They may be thinking the very same thing that you are, and are also frustrated by the 

(entirely false) belief that it's hard to change your role once it's been established.

Once you get completely comfortable and confident with your desires in your mind, you 

can get more flirty slowly, and slowly introduce sexual innuendo and your sexual desires 

into conversations (with comfortable confidence about your sexuality)… or you can have 

a straight up talk about it, expressing your wishes and talking through exactly what you 

want. 

And that brings me to the next important point about having “friends with 

benefits”… 

I draw a strong distinction between “booty calls” and “friends with benefits,” and the 

distinction is the friendship. 

There’s nothing wrong with having a “booty call” relationship with someone you have 

physical chemistry with, fun with, but no time or inclination to have anything else with, if 

you both agree and enjoy that situation. 

But friendship is something different, and it's something valuable, and while many things 

can happen in life that makes a friendship grow or diminish, we all recognize that it's 

usually worth some effort to protect our associations. 

There is no good reason why sex itself ought to present an issue for your 

friendship, but… 

When sex enters the equation, the possibility of emotional entanglement is very, very 

real, and one of you may begin to want some other level of involvement yet. And, not to 

be Captain Obvious here, but if one of you becomes more emotionally involved in 

creating a more committed sexual relationship than the other, the real and potentially 

complex emotional problems could arise in your friendship. 

While there is no absolute way to avoid this, it is important when you enter into this kind 

of thing with a good friend, that you establish and agree to precisely what the "rules" are 

going to be for the "benefits" part of the relationship, and then you need to do the best 

you can to each accurately access whether or not you can abide by those rules. 

Naturally, those rules will be subject to change as you move forward. You could quite 

quickly end up dropping the sex from the friendship or end up happily married. The 

future is notoriously difficult to predict! 

And finally, as you enter this kind of relationship, it's famous and extremely POWERFUL, 

to make a strong internal commitment to the highest good for your friend. 

In other words, if she ultimately hopes for a committed relationship in her life, you should 

be doing your best to prepare her and help her set the highest standards for that 

relationship, and you should be her biggest cheerleader when the time comes to bow out 

so that she can fully pursue her new relationship without you as a distraction.

It's my perspective that bringing up the truth of your sexual desire is not going to hurt 

your friendship with anyone, as long as you are a grown-up, and you know that you are 

capable of not making her feel weird about it: Don't pout and be bitchy if she's not 

interested, and don't be funny and clingy if she is. 

Once your beliefs and confidence line up, she'll feel the truth of that and then you can 

make a choice together about whether or not to add "benefits" the friendship while doing 

your best to protect the association and holding each other's highest good in your hearts.

Relationship Advice

Never Compromise With A Woman! 

17 

Whether you’re a man or a woman reading this, listen up: 

Real men don’t make compromises with women. 

If you want a woman's respect, if you want her to see you as a masculine "real man," 

then stop being a wimp, backing down, and making compromises. 

Okay, okay, okay, maybe the title of this post was a little too loud. Perhaps "Never" is too 

loud a word. Sometimes, sure, in some rare circumstances when there is no choice, you 

may have to compromise. 

But the vast majority of the time, when you compromise, it’s because you were too 

emotionally and intellectually WEAK and LAZY, or just plain too INSECURE to do the 

right thing… 

And if you thought I was going to say that doing the right thing means sticking to your 

guns and not backing down… 

No, no, NO! I’m not telling you to be an inflexible jerk… 

I’m talking about something completely different (and much better). 

See, when you make a compromise, you BOTH lose. Nobody got what they wanted, and 

both of you have some little reason to start feeling resentment. You begin to think: "Life 

IS easier when you're single and don't have to make deals for what you want." 

What’s fun about that? 

So if you are in a relationship, let’s look at a better way so that you ALWAYS get exactly 

what you want, and YOU ALWAYS WIN. 

(Oh, and ladies, this is for you too: Never compromise with a man!) 

I’m going to offer you 2 MUCH BETTER alternatives to the lowly compromise. 

The first one is called “Going Meta”…. 

When you and your lover want different things, take the time, effort, and energy to figure 

out the “bigger picture” of why you want what you want. 

What is it you would GET if you got it your way (that you wouldn’t get if you did it her/his 

way)? 

In NLP they call this "chunking up." I call it looking at the "meta-perspective" or the 

bigger picture.

Here’s an example… 

You want to go out and party, and she wants to stay home and cuddle. 

The compromise might be that we stay in tonight and go out tomorrow. Or you stay in, 

but invite friends over. 

Looking at the meta perspective, or figuring out the bigger picture of why you want what 

you want, maybe you discover something like this: 

You feel like you've been trapped inside all day and need to get out of the apartment. 

She craves romantic connection and togetherness time. 

Once you know that, you might realize that it’s easy for both of you to get exactly what 

you want by going out to a cozy wine-bar and snuggling in a booth, or maybe it would 

feel even better for both of you to take a long walk outside holding hands. 

Let’s look at it another way… maybe when you “chunk up” and take the bigger 

perspective you discover… 

You want to go out to spend time with friends and do some socializing. 

She wants to stay in because she doesn’t feel like getting dressed up and putting on 

heels and crap. 

Once you know that, you might realize that it would be way more fun for both of you to 

go to a ball-game or go bowling, and both get exactly what you most want. 

Now look, I understand that of course, this isn't going to work for every single situation to 

find what you both want, but just the willingness to more deeply explore yourself and 

your desires, and to more deeply explore your lover and her/his passions, is itself a BIG 

WIN. 

In fact, you'll feel more intimately connected and gain a lot of new insights about what 

lights up your partner, about what they most want and need from the relationship, and 

how to show up in ways that delight them. 

The process becomes fun, and you might even look forward to working through 

disagreements where previously you had felt trapped by the dull compromise. 

But again, this won't work every time, and no matter how much you "chunk up," and no 

matter how many times you look at the more significant and bigger and bigger picture of 

what each of you wants, you may find it hard to find common ground.

So I offer this EVEN BETTER solution that crushes compromise: 

Offer up your agreement as a GIFT to your lover. 

If you've ever purchased an exquisite gift for someone you love, something you knew 

that they would enjoy, then you already know what a fantastic PLEASURE that is. 

I talk about this with sex a lot. We all have a powerful urge to make OUR PARTNER 

experience great pleasure, huge orgasms. It's often more fun to GIVE your partner a 

great experience than to focus on your satisfaction. 

And this is the way we humans are wired. It's FUN to give a wonderful gift and watch 

someone we love to light up with appreciation and gratitude and enjoyment. 

When you frame your agreement as an opportunity to give a wonderful GIFT, rather than 

as giving something up that you wanted, you get to experience massive pleasure at 

doing it her/his way! 

In fact, you may even find that it’s MORE enjoyable to give the gift than it would have 

been to do things your way. 

But BE CAREFUL! Because there are two evil obstacles that you MUST AVOID if you 

want to do this right… 

The first obstacle is the "martyr effect" and finding yourselves competing for points on 

who gets to be the "good person" by giving up what they wanted. 

You end up trading in one argument (Let's do it MY way/No, let's do it MY way!) for a 

different discussion (Let's do it YOUR way/No, let's do it YOUR way!). 

This arises from feelings of guilt around receiving and being miserly around giving freely. 

But if you practice doing this the right way, you'll strengthen your relationship with your 

lover, and with yourself, in ways, you can't even imagine. 

The big move here is to recognize that giving your partner what they want in the 

disagreement is a beautiful, fun, and enjoyable gift. 

And that receiving your partner's agreement with open gratitude and joy MAKES it fun 

and enjoyable for both of you. 

You’ve got to get the receiving end of it right to honor your partner for their gift and make 

them feel loved and appreciated. 

Now the second evil obstacle is falling into a pattern of “taking turns” with who gets to 

have their way.

In case you didn’t notice, taking turns getting your way is nothing more than a 

compromise. 

It's boring, and it makes you acutely feel the times when it's not your turn, and you don't 

get to have your way. 

DO NOT KEEP SCORE. 

If you allow the gift to bubble up from inside of you as a spontaneous act of pleasurable 

(maybe even exciting!) generosity, then you’ll enjoy doing things Her/His way so much 

that in your memory of it, you’ll feel like you got to have things exactly the way you 

wanted them in the first place. 

When your partner is generous with their enjoyment of your gift, and you offer up your 

contribution as a pure expression of your love, as an opportunity to make your partner 

feel cherished, you'll welcome disagreements as an opportunity to demonstrate the truth 

of your love for each other. 

Why would you ever resort to something as meager and empty of meaning as a 

compromise when you could have the pleasurable feast of expressing the depth of your 

love in the form of a beautifully presented and adoringly received GIFT?

The Big Problem With Pretty Girls 

52 

Over there… There's that one smokin' hot chick in the room (it doesn't matter if it's a bar, 

a party, a classroom, an office…) It's impossible not to NOTICE her. 

A certain amount of energy is humming in your brain and your body — because of 

her. 

Deep rabbit hole alert: This is going to get controversial… 

Whether you are male or female reading this: That “smokin’ hot chick” that I’m talking 

about — just sitting in your chair and thinking about her right now, just the fact that I’m 

writing about her — is bringing up some emotions for you. 

Physical beauty is a broad and fascinating subject. And we humans are powerfully 

affected by it. 

I don't know how much of it is genetic and how much of it is the social status that our 

(U.S.) culture places upon it, but the simple fact is, beauty is not without its serious 

problems. 

I could write a book on the difficult issues and challenges it raises for the woman (or 

even a very young girl) who possesses remarkable physical beauty — it will be nearly 

impossible for her entire life not to get caught up the expectations, positive and negative, 

from the rest of us– but in this post I'm not talking about her issues… I'm going to talk 

about the problem it raises for the rest of us. 

Recently I wrote a review about a program that a close friend of mine created for "how to 

get a girlfriend," and in my review I mentioned that he has a lovely girlfriend (she's a 

professional model in fact), and further, the sales copy of his program also talks about 

how he dated "all of these beautiful women and models" before meeting his current 

girlfriend, as way to convince men they should trust him and buy his program. (As a side 

note, because he's a friend and I don't want it to be misinterpreted, it's entirely accurate). 

I got several emails from female readers saying that they were disappointed that I wrote 

the review the way I did and that I was furthering the idea that men only wanted 

"beautiful" women as girlfriends. 

They complained about how every "average" or even "ugly" guy, spends his days and 

nights trying to figure out how to land that smokin' hot chick… even if it means that he 

ends up being lonely and frustrated… when there was plenty of "average" looking 

women that would be delighted to have a cute boyfriend.

About 25 years ago a friend of mine from Europe (herself, as it happens, a smokin’ hot 

chick) said to me, with a tear in her eye: “It must be just awful to be an unattractive 

woman in the United States.” 

Back in her Scandinavian country, there was no social stigma for average looking people 

to date and fall in love with each other, or anyone else. "Looks" in general were not as 

highly regarded, and being unattractive was no indication of your social value, and did 

not automatically mean that it would be difficult for you to find a date or a mate. 

I haven't spoken to her about it in a while, but I doubt that it's true anymore, because the 

U.S. is a monster at exporting our culture through television and movies, and I have 

many readers in Europe–and based on their emails, they have fallen victim to the mania 

around physical beauty. 

The smokin’ hot chick: Women are jealous of her and resent her, and men want her and 

hold a grudge against her when they can’t have her. (I’m not talking about YOU of 

course!) but the bottom line is that she causes a lot of problems for the rest of us. 

I thought about these emails that I was getting from women, and how unfair it is that this 

stereotype exists and that our culture reinforces the idea that every man harbors this 

ultimate desire to one day get the hot chick… even if it means that he's stuck alone if he 

can't be with one. 

Said another way: We don’t CHOOSE who we’re attracted to. You can’t talk a woman 

into being attracted to you. If she’s not sexually attracted to you, you can buy her drinks 

and flowers and take her on expensive dates, and you can logically explain all day why 

you are such good husband-material, but none of that is ever going to change her 

physical response to you. 

She might think you’re a nice guy and WISH that she was attracted to you, but it’s 

not a choice. 

This is equally true for women. It's not fair, but "attraction is not a choice." A man is 

either attracted to you, or he's not, and there are a tiny number women out there that 

soak up most of the male attention. 

It's also known (and probably biologically wired), that while women are attracted to 

physically good-looking men, it is less important to them than many other factors, 

whereas men are much more attached to physical beauty as an attraction trigger.

Here’s the other side though: 

While it's true that gorgeous women have more "universal appeal" that nearly every man 

finds desirable– it's also true that every man also has a unique and personal set of 

physical attributes that he finds particularly attractive… 

There are many women out there that are incredibly polarizing: Some men find them 

irresistible while other men have no interest in them. 

Taking this further, there are also women that, PHYSICALLY, are “just right” for a subset 

of men, even though they may not be that attractive to the general population of men. 

Now I emphasized “physically” in all capital letters above, because there are an entire 

series of other, non-physical female attributes that males find sexually attractive: 

A bright smile, a flirty sense of humor, feminine mannerisms, and an innocent (or 

sometimes a “bad girl”) nature are some big ones. 

But like physical attributes where some men like big breasts but many prefer small, 

these characteristics are very particular for particular men. 

Some men love jaded and sexually aggressive women, while others have a thing for the 

girl next door, or hippie chicks, or glam girls, or biker babes. 

Based on this, there should be a guy for every girl and a girl for every guy. 

And yet, this is not the case. 

Compared with generations past we live in a world where many more men and women 

than ever before are lonely and struggle to find sex, intimacy, and partnership. 

The reason for this is the critical social status we have placed on physical beauty as a 

society, and fetishization of "hypergamy." 

Hypergamy means "marrying above your social class," like the wealthy debutante falling 

for the farm boy or Cinderella marrying the prince. 

Today "hypergamy" is becoming a common term of derision towards women who will 

only date men with money and social status. A large number of (bitter, disappointed, 

heartbroken, and angry) men who have been sexually unsuccessful use it as an excuse 

for misogyny because of their belief that MOST women (if not all) will gladly give up love, 

cheat on their man, or dump him in exchange for a man of higher social status. 

This belief about women has become incredibly popular in recent years… which is 

frustratingly lousy news for men, women, and society as a whole– because, not only are 

women who pursue hypergamy in this way vanishingly small in number, but it turns out 

that the OPPOSITE is exact:

It is MEN who are obsessively hypergamous. 

And as my friend from Europe observed many years ago, our culture has granted 

physical beauty the final social status. 

Models are superstars. 

A man who dates Victoria's Secret model is "cooler" (has higher social status) than 

famous athletes, world leaders, or even billionaires. (Though plenty of men would say 

they'd rather be a billionaire or renowned athlete because it would allow them to GET the 

super-model girlfriend). 

It's interesting to note that the highest status men (billionaires, world leaders, etc.) are far 

more likely than other men to be comfortable dating ordinary looking women. They 

already have status. 

It’s a difficult thing to NOTICE, much less to unwire, but if you are a single man reading 

this you might be able to reflect that (if you are like most men in our society), when you 

are talking to a woman socially, you might become aware that you are not only 

considering whether YOU feel physical attraction for her, but how dating her would play 

to your buddies. 

Could you justify her level of looks and cool to your friends? 

You might notice thinking about whether other men would consider you cooler or less 

cool if they saw you with her… 

This is not exclusive to the men, of course… this internal conversation around what your 

friends and peers will think if you date this person and show up to a party with him/her. 

If you catch yourself in the act, it's a BIG OPPORTUNITY to grow into greater freedom, 

self-expression, and happiness, by shaking loose the shackles of cultural programming, 

listening to your body, and following only your own pure heart.

LEADERSHIP:

Peter’s Pan 

Everyone has seen the movie or the play, Peter Pan. What we see is a boy who, for 

whatever reason, has decided that he never wants to grow up, that he wants to shirk his 

responsibility and stay in Neverland while he jokes, plays, and engages in practical jokes 

on the Hook. We realize this is a fictional work, but if we look around in society, it's not 

all that far off from what we see in a lot of men. 

I'll give you a prime example. Just the other day, there was a piece I read about a 30- 

year old man who had taken his parents to court because his parents were "evicting" 

him from their house. How pathetic is this? Maybe there's something wrong with this guy 

(apparently there's something wrong with this guy). But it's incredible that his thought 

process is to fight so hard to stay at home. I can't help, but there's something seriously 

wrong with him. But in addition to that, I can't help but think there's something wrong with 

the parents. How was this guy raised? How was he fathered? 

When I was done with high school, we went on our senior trip. The day I got home – the 

very next day – I moved out. It wasn't' because I had anything against my mother but 

because it was time. It was time to leave the nest. I see so many boys who are more 

concerned with staying at home than experiencing life. They're more concerned with not 

having bills and upholding their responsibilities. They're more concerned with Call of 

Duty or Fortnite (or whatever the game is that they're playing). They're shirking their 

responsibilities. They don't have jobs. And, their parents are enabling them actually to do 

this. And we question why we're having problems with our boys turning into men. This is 

the failure to launch syndrome – the rise of the Peter Pans. 

The good news is that there are some solutions to this. If you find yourself in a position 

where you're a boy or a male who wants to grow up but can't figure out how to do it, this 

article will provide the solution. I see so many men who use the excuse of not having a 

father figure in their life to justify their lack of performance as men. I can't believe that it 

needs to be addressed, but it indeed does. So, let's talk about this today. 

If you're experiencing this and you're nervous about launching, I'm going to share some 

ideas. But, I'm also going share some insights for those of us who are fathers – 

someone who is responsible for raising up boys in a way where they want to go out into 

society and produce, as opposed to consuming. And that's the difference between a boy 

and a man. A boy drinks. That's all he does. Sure, men can absorb as well, but they also 

produce. And hopefully, they are providing significantly more than they consume. You 

can see if that's not the case, which we'd have a real problem. 

For example, I look at my boys and daughter. They consume resources. That's not bad, 

that's what they do. My goal as a parent, however, is to help them stand on their own 

two feet. Too many parents these days are doing everything for their children thinking 

that somehow they're giving their children a leg up when they do everything for them.

They're not. They're crippling their children. They're hindering their ability to learn and to 

develop the strength they need to be successful. 

Take an infant for example: if you carry that infant everywhere, that child will never 

develop the physical leg strength to be able to walk. The same holds true when it comes 

to their mental and emotional capacity as well. We can see boys and girls who may have 

developed physically, but mentally and emotionally, are a complete wreck because 

they've never had to engage and establish any endurance and grit. 

Growing Up is Not Bad 

We have got to understand that growing up is not a bad thing. So many people believe 

that, if they grow up they’ll have too many burdens, responsibilities, issues, struggles, 

trials, and challenges. Yes, that is true. You will have those things, but there are also so 

many blessings that come from those situations. 

As I've grown up, I've met my wife, brought children into this world, started businesses, 

been on some fantastic vacations, and had numerous beautiful experiences. It's 

incredible. To have meaningful and significant experiences in your life, you are going to 

have to experience some hardships. That's part of the deal. You cannot have one 

without the other. And anytime an individual tries to get something for nothing, and they 

rob themselves of developing their talents, gifts, and abilities. 

Growing up and accepting responsibility and accountability for your own life is not a bad 

thing. It’s a beautiful thing. It’s a great thing. There are so many benefits and rewards 

that come from taking responsibility for your life. 

No One Owes You Anything 

Nobody is here to serve you and be at your beck and call. Nobody is here to give you 

everything that you think you deserve. There’s no family member, no business, no 

government entity, no non-profit organization that owes you a thing. 

So many people believe that they are entitled to something just because they're a 

human being, just because air is coursing through their lungs. I got news for you, and if 

that's what you believe, you are significantly playing at a degree less than you are 

capable of. When you realize that nobody owes you a thing and, you fully internalize 

that, you give yourself the power to earn everything you desire. 

You deserve everything you currently you have. If you have wealth, abundance, and 

prosperity in your life, you deserve that. If you don't, it's because you deserve that level 

of wealth, or success, or abundance, or lack thereof. 

Now, some people hear that and think, "Well, what about people who can't? And, what 

about those who are disabled?" I'm not talking about that. I'm talking about those who 

are fully capable of providing their way.

Again, you are not entitled to anything. But, that’s okay. Because once you accept 

responsibility, you can go out and earn it, which is significantly more rewarding. 

Spend More Time with Men, Not Boys 

If you’re telling yourself, “I just don’t know how to step up as a man,” you need to stop 

spending time with boys. Find a way to spend time with men. If you surround yourself 

with people who don’t take accountability and responsibility for their life, I’d have you 

consider that’s probably the way you’re going to turn out as well. You are going to be just 

like that. 

Now, on the other hand, if you find men to surround yourself with (co-workers, 

colleagues, friends, parents, brothers, and people who are doing big things in their life), 

that will inevitably wear off on you. You will strive to be more like those individuals. 

If you strive to spend time with genuine men, you’re going to find people who lift you up, 

motivate you, inspire you, and give you a kick in the pants that you need. You’re going 

rise up to the challenge. 

Don't look for the access path. Don't search for the path of least resistance. That's what 

boys do. Men, however, know life is a challenge. They rise to that challenge because 

they've realized the rewards and the benefits on the other side of that trial and obstacle 

are well worth the effort. 

Find Meaningful Purpose 

It’s not enough to have trivial pursuits in your life. What’s driving you? What's motivating 

you? How big and audacious are those goals? If you don't have goals or something 

significant to pursue, it's likely you're not going to rise and become the man that you 

were meant to be, and you're going to play at a level far less than you're capable of. If 

nothing is pushing and pulling you, driving and motivating you, sit down and figure out 

exactly what you want. You don't have to have this completely figured out, and it's likely 

going to change over time so be patient with yourself. 

I ask you, "What do you want," and you can't answer that question, there's a real 

problem but, if I ask you, "What is it that you want out of life," and you can look me in the 

eye and say, “this is exactly what I want. Here is the job I want to have. Here are the 

experiences I want to pursue. Here are the changes I want to make,” you’re well on your 

way to becoming a man. 

Now, let's talk about the second component I wanted to address: us as father figures. It's 

not just dads I'm talking about, but community leaders, mentors, business owners, 

employers, etc. We have a responsibility to raise the next generation. We're going to ask 

that they lead us at some point. We ought to make sure we're adequately preparing 

them to drive.

Do Not Allow Our Children to be Raised by Women Exclusively 

Women bring something beautiful to the environment. My wife does a fantastic job in 

fulfilling her responsibilities as a mother. She is compassionate, empathetic, supportive, 

and loving. I'm not suggesting men can't exhibit those traits as well, but women are 

uniquely equipped to thrive in those ways. And, that's much needed in society. 

But, if you look at the rate of fatherless homes and you look at the price of female versus 

male school teachers, it's very apparent that a large percentage of our population is 

being raised in the home and the school system without a male figure in their life. 

Boys Need to be Challenged 

Why is that a problem? Among other reasons, these boys are not being challenged. 

They're not being pushed. They're not standing face-to-face with another man who is 

forcing him, who's driving him to be better, who's course-correcting along the way. 

We recognize this in the very soft, effeminate trend in our boys who are not rising to the 

challenge of being a man. That statement is going to fire a lot of people up. I'm not 

discounting at all what women bring into a loving household and society in general. What 

I am saying is that both the masculine and the feminine energy are needed. If all these 

boys are receiving is female energy, I don't think it should be any surprise that they don't 

learn how to be men. 

My mother raised me primarily on her own. But, if you were to ask her if she equipped to 

give me everything I needed as a boy learning how to be a man, she would be the first to 

tell you that she did not. She was not equipped with everything she needed which is why 

she got me involved in competitive sports. I needed a physical, mental, emotional 

challenge. I needed other men to stand with. I needed to disciplined by other men. I 

needed to be course-corrected by other men who weren’t afraid to have those 

challenging conversations, get in my face, and tell me when I was doing wrong and 

when I was doing right. 

There Must be Consequences 

Please understand me. There have to be consequences for our decisions, both positive 

and negative. When our children make good choices, we should reward them. I'm not 

saying gift them things. I'm assuming we encourage them with a simple comment or a 

compliment. Every time a child does something right works hard, exhibits discipline 

shows commitment, overcomes a trial, or does something above and beyond what they 

are called to do, we ought to encourage that. 

When a child does something wrong, gets into trouble, and doesn't do what he or she is 

supposed to do, then we as parents have to, at times, be the deliverer of the 

consequences. That's not fun. Nobody wants to do that. Nobody wants to see their child

suffer. I don't want to look at my boys, and my little girl goes through challenges. But, I 

would rather have them go through these types of problems in a controlled environment 

under my watchful eye than run loose and do who knows what without any 

consequences or thought about the future and how it might impact them. 

That is my job as a father: to introduce struggle, challenge, adversity, and trials. And, 

equip my children with the tools to be able to handle those obstacles. These factors, 

when not present in the home or young men’s lives, create the kind of situation where a 

30-year-old man can go to court and sue his parents because they’re kicking him out of 

the house. 

It's a small symptom of the underlying problem that is the rise of the Peter Pans in 

society. We have to reverse this trend. How do we do it? First and foremost, we stop 

living this way ourselves. We take responsibility. When there's an opportunity at work, 

we step up to the possibility. We take on the trial. We take on the task. We don't shirk 

our responsibilities. We don't take the path of least resistance. We do the hard things 

because we realize, although it's hard, there are benefits on the other side of that 

problematic challenge and adversity. 

Second, we instill the same thing in our boys. We don't coddle them. We don't protect 

them. We don't shelter them unnecessarily. We allow them to be introduced to 

challenge, trial, adversity, and struggle. We teach them what it means to have a 

significant purpose in their lives. We help them deal with the consequences of their 

decisions so, when we look back and ask if we did an excellent job as a father, we can 

see our boys and girls standing on their own two feet doing what they should be doing 

as functioning and contributing members of society. 

I wish the answers were easy. They’re certainly not. It’s hard to articulate everything that 

should and can be done in a simple Article, but I firmly believe that this is the beginning 

of the solution to the rise of the Peter Pans. 

Do not allow yourself to be fooled into thinking that the path of least resistance is the 

path that we are destined to take as men. It's not. We should be looking for the harder 

way – the more challenging route. Afterall, the view on the other side of that is 

significantly more rewarding than playing it safe and taking it easy. 

How we Stop School Shootings?...Like this

Every time we turn around it seems like there's yet another school shooting. And, from 

what I can see, we're addressing this from a very surface-level perspective. This is not 

about gun control. This is not about gun regulation. In fact, I don't even believe it's 

entirely a gun problem. I think it's a symptom of the problem but not the problem. 

It has to do with the young men who are creating these situations. But more so, we 

ought to put the responsibility where it indeed lies, which is on us as men. I'm going to 

explain what I mean by that. Bear with me, because I think you're going to agree at the 

end of this conversation that we've got a real problem with the way that we, as men, are 

showing up. And the symptom of that is school shootings and some of the other 

atrocities that we see in society today. 

Before I get into the details, I do want to say again, this is not meant to be a gun debate, 

but there are a couple of surface level issues that I do want to address first and foremost 

before we get deeper into this. 

So, let's begin by addressing how we physically protect our kids when they're at school. 

There are some straightforward solutions to this: 

LIMITED ENTRY POINTS I see so many schools that are open. People can come in 

and out wherever, there's no entry point, and there's no fixed exit point. If we can limit 

entry points in schools, we can more easily regulate who is coming in, who is going out, 

where they're going, what they're doing, what they're up to, and what their business is 

there. Having limited entry points to schools is going to solve a lot of these problems. 

METAL DETECTORS If you have limited entry points, and you can put metal detectors 

at these entry and exit points, it’s likely you’ll catch and even deter any would-be shooter 

from entering a school with firearms in the first place. 

That said, I am mixed on that because it’s difficult for me to think about my kids going to 

school and being on lockdown, and having metal detectors, and turning this into a 

policed school. That’s difficult for me to think about but I do believe that there’s validity to 

being able to protect our children in that way. 

Outfitted VETERANS This is a subject that has been brought up over, and over, and 

over again. America has spent billions and billions of dollars training military members. 

We have men and women who come home who have lost their purpose because they're 

no longer in the military. Having a new mission – a new target – could potentially 

eliminate a lot of these problems right off the bat. 

A bully goes for the weak target, and we've allowed our schools to become the soft 

target. We've made them vulnerable to attacks, and we've exposed our children to 

potential threats, including death.

So, how do you fix the problem? You stop making it an easy target. We do that by 

implementing limited entry points, metal detectors, and armed veterans in the school 

system. 

CONCEALED CARRYING SCHOOL TEACHERS I would also suggest we consider 

allowing qualified school teachers to carry firearms – not forcing them to but allowing 

them to. 

Now, as I said, I didn't want to make this a gun debate. That's not what it's about, but I 

think those are four straightforward solutions that we can implement reasonably quickly 

that would alleviate a lot of the problems that we see. 

Now that we have that out of the way let's drill down a little bit. 

Young boys are the ones who are creating these problems. They're the ones in the 

school shootings. They're the ones doing the shot. And, if you look at the way that we 

have begun to treat our boys, I think it becomes very apparent that there are some real 

problems in the way that we address our boys in the school system. 

First, the school system is stacked against young men. If you take a look at any metric – 

from crime and violence to grades and drop out rates – you see that boys are falling 

behind. That's partly because the school system is not conducive to teaching boys the 

way that they need to be shown. 

Surprise, surprise, there’s a difference between the way boys and girls learn 

information, consume information, and get ideas about the way this world works. 

Couple that with another problem I see, the drug epidemic with children. And, I’m not 

talking about illegal drugs either. I’m talking about the way we medicate our boys. Our 

boys get a little rambunctious, a little rowdy, a little upset, they fight, they compete, they 

do the things that boys do, and rather than say, “this is healthy behavior for a boy,” they 

say it’s unhealthy and begin to medicate them. 

We were at the park last night with my boys and my daughter. One of my came up to me 

to show me a stick he found looked like a gun. He’s said, “Dad, look, I found this stick. 

It’s my gun.” Then he picked a handful of wood chips and said, “These are my bullets.” 

From there, he ran around “shooting” his brother and sister with his gun and his bullets. 

If he did that at school, he would be suspended, if not expelled, from school. And yet, 

that's utterly healthy behavior. There's nothing wrong with a boy playing Cowboys and 

Indians. There's nothing wrong with a boy who wants to pretend that he's shooting the 

bad guy. There's entirely nothing wrong with that. There's nothing wrong with a young 

boy drawing a picture of a violent war scene. 

Why? Because that's the way, they engage. That's the way that they create. When those 

behaviors are channeled into the proper outlets, they become the skill set and the 

characteristics for boys who will eventually become men who protect, provide, and 

preside.

If we strip that away from them and pretend there's something wrong with them, we're 

going to see some real problems. We are experiencing the real issues from over 

medicating our young men now. It's horrific. 

Instead of medicating our boys (and I’m not saying that there aren’t boys who need 

medication) for ADD and ADHD, why not create a system in which boys can learn the 

way they learn, through experiential learning? Let them go out and roll around in the dirt, 

hike, pick up bugs, explore rocks, and do the things that we as boys always wanted to 

do. If we strip that away, we see these problems. 

The next issue here (and this is going to be the meat of the conversation today) is 

fatherless homes. 

As I was researching this topic, I started looking into some of the data. What I found is 

crazy. The ramifications and impact on our young men of not having permanent father 

figures in their lives are scary. 

I grew up without a permanent father figure. I get messages every day from men who 

listen to our podcast and read our articles that grew up without a father figure. This 

statistic is getting worse. More boys are being born out of wedlock. Dad is physical, 

mentally, and emotionally out of the picture. And, now, we have more boys who have 

this raw masculinity coursing through their veins, and yet they have no example of how 

to harness that masculinity into something that's called "manliness" that will help the 

world. 

I look at my boys, and by their very nature, they're destructive. They go outside, and they 

destroy stuff. It's my job as a father to harness that and teach them how to use that 

constructively. Rather than be destructive, it’s my job to help them to be constructive 

– help them to build things, help them to lift other people up, help them to use that 

creativity and that imagination in a way that’s going to benefit their lives and the lives of 

the people that eventually they’ll have a responsibility for. They don’t get that when a 

father is not in the picture. 

Take a look at some of the problems that are magnified when dad is not around: 

Poverty 

Behavioral issues

Prison time 

Crime rates 

Abuse and neglect 

Drug and alcohol abuse 

Drop out rates 

Suicide 

That's eight factors that get worse statistically when a father is not in the home! If that 

doesn't show you how important it is for fathers to be in the house, I don't know what 

else I can tell you. 

Some people will argue with me about that. Some people think that I'm attacking single 

mothers because I share that data (which is ridiculous). A single mother raised me. She 

did everything that she could to raise my sister and me. And yet, when I have 

conversations with her today, she will readily admit that she wasn't able to provide me, 

on her own, with everything that I needed to transition from boy to man. 

This is not a gun problem. We can talk about that, sure, but it’s not a gun problem. It’s 

not even a young man problem. It’s a fatherhood problem. Plain and simple, it is a 

fatherhood problem. 

So, how do we address this? 

First (and I know this is going to upset people) if you aren’t in the space – mentally, 

physically, emotionally, and financially – to have kids, don’t. Why in the world would 

anyone bring a child into this world that they cannot possibly take care of? 

Please notice I didn't say "ready." You can't ever entirely be ready to bring a child into 

this world, but at least, to some degree, you have to be capable of providing for a child. 

And if you're not, please do not bring a child into this world. It's not fair to you, and it's 

not fair to that child, it's not appropriate to society. Be responsible. 

Second, we have got to be present for our kids. It's not enough to provide financially 

for our children. It's not enough to put money in the bank account. That's a critical 

component, no doubt, but it's not enough. It's not the full deal. It's not the full definition of 

provision. When I talk about providing, I'm talking about physically, mentally, and 

emotionally 

I can see my boys (mainly, my oldest) struggling with how to behave, how to become a 

man, how a man acts, how a man interacts, how a father shows up, how a husband 

shows up, how a guy shows up in his community. I can see that in my son now. He's ten 

years old. If I'm not physically present providing an example for him, where does he 

learn that stuff? 

Well, he learns it from athletes. He discovers it on the news. He learns it from people on 

social media. He learns it from his friends who don't have fathers. That's where he gets 

his ideas of masculinity and manliness, and guess what? It's not healthy.

The healthy way to provide an example for a child is to be the example for your child. Be 

there physically. Be there mentally. Get your own house in order. Get your stuff situated 

so that when your boy comes to you with some challenges, or you recognize them in 

him, you can do something about it. 

If you can't get yourself right because you're fat, or overweight, or out of shape, or you 

have abuse issues, or your financial situation isn't in order, or you're depressed, or 

you're not doing the things that you know you should be doing, how in the world are you 

ever going to provide what that young man needs in his life? How are you going to be 

the beacon he needs? How are you going to have the capacity to sit down, shoulder to 

shoulder, with your son and say, "You know what, I recognize something's not right bud. 

How can I help you? Here's what I did. Here's what I have experienced. Here's what I 

went through. Here's how I dealt with the things when I was wrong, or when I was off, or 

when I was going through what you are going through right now." You can't do that if you 

haven't fixed yourself first. 

Get yourself right, guys – emotionally as well. And that's the last component I wanted 

to talk about here. Be available, emotionally. A lot of us have this macho/"alpha" idea of 

what it means to be a man. But it's okay to express your emotions. Being happy is okay. 

Being sad is okay. It's okay to cry. Being an emotional person is okay. You are a human 

being. We don't need to hide our emotions. We don't always need to express them, 

either. There needs to be a healthy balance between the way that we use our feelings to 

serve us and those that we must help. 

So, when you recognize in your son that he’s dealing with a difficult time, whether he got 

rejected, failed the test, got cut from the team, went to a party, been exposed to 

pornography, got into drugs and alcohol, you can be empathetic to what he’s going 

through. You can be there the way that he needs you to be there so that he takes these 

experiences – positive and negative – and uses every single one of them to be a 

contributing member of this society. 

Be there. Be present as a father. 

The last thing I want to talk about is fathering other boys in the community. You have 

a responsibility for that, as do I. I see a lot of guys who are great with their kids, and yet 

when you ask them to volunteer to coach a sports team or to step up in sort of 

leadership capacity, or serve in some young men's type organization, they won't do it, or 

they can't do it. 

That's a problem. You are not just the father in your home, but you are also a fatherfigure 

in the community. You have an obligation to your community. You have a 

responsibility to your community. It's not enough to father your home, you've got to 

father the community. That's our job. That's our responsibility. 

If there's an opportunity for you to coach your son's team, take it. Not only is that a 

chance to forge a new bond with him, but it's also an opportunity to form a unique 

relationship with 20 other kids who need your help because they're not growing up 

without fathers, because their dads aren't listening to this podcast, because their dads

aren't around, because their dad is too busy working, and because maybe they don't 

even know who their dad is. 

We’ve been doing stepping up as men in the community thousands of years by 

operating in packs and tribes and serving each other and helping each other where we 

can, lifting each other up when we fall. 

And yet, I look around in society, and I see so many people who are consumed with 

themselves that they have no capacity to serve other people. It's easy to do. I get it, and 

you're busy. I'm working, I've got stuff to do. I've got my stuff to take care of. And yet, if 

we can't find a way to serve in the communities in which we live, we're going to continue 

to see more and more horrific school shootings, violence, crime, drug abuse, neglect, 

and all of the things I talked about earlier. 

I don't have all the solutions, and I certainly don't. I'm figuring this stuff out just like you. 

I'm a young father, 37 years old, with four kids. I'm trying to make just as much sense 

out of this as anyone else. 

But I can tell you that I look around in society, and I see some very, very serious issues. 

I know beyond a shadow of a doubt, with every fiber of my being, that if we can learn to 

be the type of men that we are called to be these problems may not go away, but I 

guarantee that we'll make a dent, that we'll make an impact, that we'll see improvement. 

And, if we can compound those improvements over time, over, and over, and over 

again, generationally, we will see the change we know we need.

Single Dads 

Preparing Sons for Manhood as a Single Dad

Be prepared. This is the Boy Scouts’ motto. It should also be the calling for every young 

man as he ventures into manhood—spearheaded by his father to help get him there. 

As a father, you carry considerable weight when it comes to influencing the way your 

son views himself as a man, how he treats women, and his self-confidence. He’s 

counting on you to navigate him through life’s uncertainties in becoming a real man. 

Here are a few quick tips for single dads raising sons—whether alone or in a coparenting 

agreement. 

Finding His Identity 

“I’ve learned that simple walks with my father around the block when I was a child…did 

wonders for me as an adult.”—Andy Rooney 

This quote emphasizes the point of how crucial father-son time is. Dad, engaging 

actively in your son's life will lead to him gaining greater self-confidence, a healthy 

perspective of masculinity, and reduce the possibility of his involvement in risky 

behaviors. Whether it's breakfast on a Saturday morning, working on the car, playing 

games, or as stated above, simple walks—they all add up tremendously in the 

upbringing of a confident young man. 

If Mom Is Not Present 

Whether she's physically or emotionally absent, a mother provides a need in a young 

man's life that only she can fill—like us dads filling the needs only we can. Talk about his 

mom positively and respectfully. If that's a stretch now, hold your tongue and don't say 

anything at all. Help him to honor his mother. Be creative whenever possible, such as 

making her a card or gift for special occasions. Encourage your son through ageappropriate 

touch and affection. Give him the nurturing he desires. Your boy will view all 

women, in the same manner, you model. Let him see you open doors for ladies, 

anything that models chivalry or courtesy will go a long way. 

Finding a strong mother-figure to be in his life can be a great move as well. This doesn’t 

necessarily mean someone you are dating, though that may happen eventually. Is there 

currently a close family member or friend he can relate to within healthy boundaries to fill 

in those mother gaps? 

Preparing Him For The Battle Ahead 

It's no secret we live in a hyper-sexualized culture. I mentor a middle school boy. One 

day I talked to my wife about the difference between the way girls dress in elementary 

school versus middle school. She reminded me that my mentee sees that every day. 

How will you talk to your son about the proper way to treat women and help keep his 

eyes and heart protected? Even with a smaller amount of parenting time, you can be 

influential here—but it must remain a front-burner issue and delivered in a way he will 

understand.

Similarly, when we fathers hold fast to our integrity regarding protecting our hearts and 

eyes, we are much stronger in living truth out before our children. No doubt single dads 

have their fill of sexual temptation too. How much more will a growing boy face and how 

will you lead him through it? The more equipped you are to face the battle of sexual 

temptation the easier it will be to have confident talks with your son. We're able to impart 

solid wisdom when we are living in integrity ourselves.

10 Things to Write a Letter to Your Daughter 

A letter to my daughter from me is unique and lasting. It doesn't have to belong. No 

matter the length it is something she can keep and cherish. When our daughters face an 

exhausting day, they will always be able to turn to our encouraging words. To help you 

get started, here are ten things to write a letter to your daughter (and keep a copy for 

yourself): 

When our daughters face a stressful day, they will always be able to turn to our 

encouraging words. 

1. “I love you from the bottom of my heart.” 

Consistent expressions of love cannot be overdone. The more parents say it, the more 

deeply it is appreciated. She’s less likely to look for love “in all the wrong places” when 

she’s confident her dad’s crazy about her. 

2. “I believe in you.” 

Not just “I believe in you,” but “Here’s why.” 

You're my daughter, and I love you. 

You’re smart. 

I trust you. 

You’re a hard worker. 

You’re grounded in your faith. 

3. “I think you’re beautiful.” 

Again, this is about fundamental confidence in who she is: beautiful both inside and out. 

Just like her mother, she is going to be just as beautiful as you say she is. 

4. “You make me proud in so many ways.” 

Tell her how much who she is meant to you.

When I watch you act with compassion, it makes my heart burst with pride. 

The work you did on that project, the way you help out around the house, the 

good manners you use around other people, the way you handle your 

allowance… 

No need to make stuff up, affirm what's going right. 

5. “I want you to know what my treasures are.” 

Share your fundamental values with your daughter. Teaching kids from our hearts 

require some extra effort. "I'm not sure if I've ever told you this, but I've never cared that 

much about money. I treasure my family. I love your mother. You and your brother are 

worth more to me than anything. My faith in God is the very ground I stand on, and being 

part of a faith community has made all the difference to this family. You may not realize 

this, but I passed up a huge promotion when you were little, so we could stay in this 

community where we are loved, and you have friends…" 

6. “Let me tell you about the day you were born.” 

You may or not be a writer, but you can share some of the emotions you felt that day. 

I cried like a baby the first time I held you. 

I prayed for you every day for nine months, and I haven’t stopped since. 

You were such a beautiful baby from the first moment. 

Because of you, I love your mother ten times more than what I thought was 

possible. 

7. “Don’t ever settle for second best.” 

You’ve been teaching her this all along, but make it clear in this letter too. Parents want 

the best for their children, but it’s time she takes ownership of that value. 

Use the gifts you’ve been given. 

Treat your body with respect. 

Spend your life with someone who loves you as I do. 

Explain why: she was created in love and with a purpose. She was designed to both live 

and love at capacity. That requires the very best. 

8. “Sometimes my love makes me afraid.” 

Be honest about the way your love for her makes you cautious. Tell her prospective 

boyfriends are going to have to pass inspection, not because you don't trust her but 

because you love her. Tell her she's going to have to call you and text you when she's 

out of the house because you ache when you can't reach out and hold her hand. Tell her 

you to need her to reassure you sometimes. Allow yourself to be vulnerable.

9. “You can always come to me—no matter what—and I will help you figure things 

out.” 

Raising kids or raising teenagers, either way, it's essential your daughter understands 

that nothing will ever stop you from loving her. Make sure she knows that, even if she's 

in trouble, she can talk to you and that you're willing to help her formulate a plan. Tell her 

you will always take her calls and listen when she needs to talk. 

10. “Now I want you to listen to my heart.” 

Only you know what to write here. But make sure you share from the bottom of your 

heart. If you're a man of faith, tell her what that means to you. If you have a moving story 

about your relationship to your parents, offer it here. If you're a poet, write some verse. 

Do you have a song that expresses something of your soul, quote it here. This is the 

time for authenticity. 

10 Perfect Daddy-Daughter Date Ideas 

Our daughter is excited. She has a date with her first love. Mom helps her get ready, and 

she looks beautiful. There's no insecurity because she knows her time loves her 

unconditionally. She has known him her whole life. He is faithful, trustworthy, and fun.

There's a knock on the door, and she takes one last look in the mirror before answering. 

She opens the door, sees her date, and smiles, "Hi, Daddy." It may dawn on you: The 

only guy I know that I can trust with this jewel is me. Hopefully, there will be a guy you 

feel just as confident about at some point. But you can worry about that later because 

tonight it’s all about the two of you. 

Taking your daughter on dates is one of the most important things you can do for her. 

We want to help you plan a great time together. Here are ten perfect ideas for a daddydaughter 

date night that will take her breath away. 

Note: Somewhere around middle school, she will probably go through a phase of 

awkwardness with you. She won’t want to be seen with you, and there may even be 

barriers to conversation. Don’t worry. It will get better. In the meantime, take her to 

places where she won’t see anyone she knows. 

1. Do Her Favorite Thing. 

Figure out her favorite activity, game, or sport. A date can be as simple as playing 

“horse” if she loves basketball or sitting at a park table making crafts. 

2. Go on a Picnic. 

Pack her favorite foods, particularly dessert. Make a playlist of her favorite songs. Find a 

vast field and put down a comfortable blanket. After eating, read to her or lay down and 

play cloud shapes. 

3. Paint Pottery. 

This gives you the opportunity to be creative and come away with something tangible to 

remember your time together. 

4. Go to a Carnival/Festival. 

A corn-dog, funnel cake, cotton candy, and your daughter by your side. Sounds like 

heaven. Enjoy the sights and sounds; perhaps win her a stuffed animal. 

5. See a Show. 

It can be as simple as local theater or as elaborate as a Broadway show. My sister still 

talks about my dad taking her to see Annie in New York well over 30 years ago. 

6. Take Her Shopping. 

Set the budget before you go. Perhaps it is even a no purchase shopping day or 

something small. When it comes to shopping, girls enjoy the journey as much as the 

item. The size of your credit card is not what communicates love, but your willingness to 

be in her world. 

The size of your credit card is not what communicates love, but your willingness to be in 

her world.

7. Try Geo-caching. 

Get out into nature in a fun way by looking for hidden treasure. Most of the time, you will 

find a nasty old toy. The actual cache will be your time together. 

8. Have a Dinner Date. 

Simple, classic, and plenty of opportunities to talk. Take her to her favorite place or find 

a new one where neither one of you have been. 

9. Host a Ball at Home or Go to a Formal Dance Class. 

Girls love to dance. The first person they should learn with or teach them ought to be 

their dad. If they are still in the era of princesses, set up a ball at home. Play the prince. 

Give her the Cinderella experience. If she is older, take her to a formal dance class or 

perhaps even swing dancing if you are brave. 

10. Have a Photo Scavenger Hunt. 

Come up with a list of things to capture. You can choose to make a list and surprise her 

with the idea or have her help you. The two of you can want to be in the pictures or not. 

Taking your daughter on dates is one of the most important things you can do for 

her. 

10 Things I Hope My Children Remember about Me as a 

Father 

One of these days (sooner than I’d like to admit) my kids are going to be out of the 

house and have kids of their own. (And my oldest is married with kids of her own). 

And while I’ll be looking back on my parenting years as a distant memory, my children’s 

hearts will no doubt be filled with many memories of me as a father as well. 

I desire that I would not only leave fond memories and an example worth following but 

that I would ultimately leave a legacy of what true fatherhood was meant to be. I desire 

to fulfill my role to it's fullest. Here are some things I hope my children keep in mind 

when they remember me as their father. 

Note: This is my list. What does yours look like?

1. He knew how to have fun. 

I hope that one day I’ll look back on the parenting years as some of the most fun years 

of our family’s lives. I hope that my kids will do the same. Because we didn’t endure life 

together, we enjoyed it. 

2. He gave us lots of physical affection. 

Kids need lots of affection. Dads often struggle to give enough of it. May my kids never 

doubt my love because I failed to show it in one of the simplest and most powerful ways 

possible— physical touch. 

3. He spent time with us. 

I want their childhood to be filled with countless memories of times when Dad said "Yes" 

to them and their requests for his time and attention. Times when we played together, 

wrestled together, laughed together, served concurrently, and quietly lived this thing we 

call life together. Because Dad chose to be present, wanted to be involved, and wasn't 

too busy to be there. 

4. He knew how to be both our father and daddy. 

My kids need a daddy to look up to, but they also need a father to respect. Sometimes 

being a dad means you get to be your kids’ best friend and hero. Other times, it means 

you have to be the disciplinarian and ‘the bad guy.’ A balance of both is essential. May 

my kids remember me as both their father and daddy. 

5. He was patient and kind. 

Kids mess up and need regular correction and guidance. May I always remember that 

my kids are just that— kids, whom God has given me to prepare for life. And may they 

still remember that I was patient and kind towards them, even in those times when I had 

to be firm. May they remember my correction and discipline for being done out of love 

and understanding, not out of anger or frustration. 

6. He was helpful. 

May they remember seeing me doing the dishes for Mom, helping them with their 

homework, and serving the family in any way that was needed. I hope they remember 

me for being approachable. May they always remind me of being present. 

7. He was in love with our mother. 

Dad loved Mom, and it was never something that they had to question. Dad made his 

love evident in the way that he spoke to her, kissed her, treated her, and prioritized her. 

8. He loved serving others. 

He lived a generous life towards others in need, and he encouraged us to do the same. 

My dad made a difference in the lives of others by following the example of Jesus.

9. He loved me unconditionally. 

Whether we were having fun or getting in trouble, we never questioned Dad's love. 

Because he regularly told us…and because he showed us periodically. 

10. He loved God. 

I am a man of faith, and I want my kids to see that. I want them to know that is why my 

life was focused on serving the Lord through helping others. I want them to think that 

their father was a difference maker in his family, his church, and his community. 

My kids need a daddy to look up to, but they also need a father to respect. 

Teach Your Children to Make Wise Decisions 

At the end of every night, we have our kids clean up the messes they have made. Most 

of those messes are in their rooms where all of the toys they have played with are 

sprawled out on the floor. If there were a competition for the slowest toy picker upper, 

my daughter would be champion of the world. That coupled with her ability to play with 

all of her toys and leave them out in a single day was a recipe for disaster. There were 

nights she didn't get her room clean. I told her the wise decision would be for her to put 

her toys away when she's done playing with them, so she isn't left with an overwhelming 

mess. She didn't do it, and we continued having the same problem. Finally, I started 

putting a timer in her room and told her that whatever was not put away when the timer 

went off she would lose for a day. 

For several days nothing changed. Then one night she went upstairs to clean and came 

down two minutes later. I was surprised to see her so quickly and then she explained 

that during the day she put her toys away when she was done playing with them rather 

than waiting. I told her it was a wise decision. Teaching kids to make wise decisions can 

be difficult, but it can be done with the right techniques. Here are 10 ways to teach your 

kids to make the right decisions. 

1. Let them make mistakes 

As parents, our natural instinct is to shield our kids from all potential pitfalls. But carefully 

letting your kids learn a hard lesson from their own mistakes and then talking to them 

about it after the fact will give them great insight.

2. Expose them to the ‘real world’ 

Our shielding instinct is to hide the cold, ugly world from the eyes of our children. Yet, 

there is no better teacher than a helpful dose of reality. For instance, maybe you caught 

your child smoking. Instead of grounding him for two weeks and giving him a verbal 

lashing, download pictures from the Internet of the lungs of those who smoke. This is far 

more powerful in their mind than sitting in their room mad at you because they can’t go 

out on Friday night. You still might ground them, of course, but WITH the real-life 

example of why you must do so. 

3. Teach your child to know herself 

One of the greatest keys to wisdom is honestly being able to look at yourself in the 

mirror and know who is looking back. Children who can distinguish their own strengths 

and weaknesses are apt to make better decisions based on their abilities. American Idol 

was a good example of this. Constantly we saw young people on this show who truly 

believed they were great singers when the reality was so clear. Children should be 

encouraged to try many wonderful things, but be able to realize they will not excel in 

them all. 

4. Learn your child’s interests 

Maybe they are into football. Maybe music, art, cooking, etc. Whatever it may be, find 

out or HELP your child find out his interests. They provide real-life examples of others 

that share their same likes and who are successful. This teaches that hard work and 

dedication are the keys to success and those traits lend very well to decision making. 

5. Talk to your child 

Open communication is vital to parenting but is quite often hard to achieve. The second 

a child senses a lecture, you’ve lost his ear. If you can find common areas where you 

bond and illicit real discussion from your child, you will gain invaluable insight into how 

he thinks. This, in turn, gives you the ability to know what decision he is going to make 

before he even makes it. If it’s not going to be the correct one, then you can intervene 

and guide in the proper direction. 

6. Get involved 

Whether it is church youth groups, Boy Scouts, Girl Scouts, or any variety of social 

organizations, having your child get involved will teach her life skills that will grow her 

wisdom. It also exposes her to positive peer pressure and increases the likelihood that 

the decisions she makes will be the correct ones. If a child has a lot to lose by acting 

foolish, she is much less likely to do so. One of the best ways for you to get involved in 

your child’s life is to be a presence at his or her school. 

7. Money, money, money 

One of the greatest gifts you can give your child is to teach them how to handle money 

properly. If you can teach your child to handle money in a responsible manner, most 

likely that will follow through into the other parts of his life. An ancient proverb says, “Of 

what use is money in the hand of a fool, since he has no desire to get wisdom?”

8. Pile on the PRAISE 

Too often, parents tend to focus on the things our children might need work on. We want 

to fix their struggles. Yet, we might forget to praise when they get it right, as they so 

often do. Example: "Dad, did you see me hit that 20 footer from the corner?" "Yes, good 

job, but you had a couple of turnovers. You need to be more careful with the ball." Sound 

familiar? By raising our children when they do great things, it helps reinforce the desire 

to make decisions to have similar outcomes. 

9. The friends we keep 

If we are only as strong as our weakest link, then teaching your children how to choose 

friendships is a vitally important task. As important as we like to think we are to our kids, 

their world revolves around their own social interactions and circles of friends. It is THEM 

they are listening to, and not us in many circumstances. One sure-fire way to know what 

direction your child is headed in is to get to know his friends. “Show me your friends, and 

I’ll show you your future.” 

10. Lead by example 

If you yourself do not follow these principles, then how do you expect your child to want 

to? “Do as I say, not as I do” is NOT a good conversation starter with a child. If need be, 

use your own faults as an example of how not to be and promise to do better. Humbling 

yourself in front of your child and admitting your weakness will actually make him feel 

closer to you. Where you do have strengths in decision-making skills, teach those to 

him. The best lessons in life are caught, not taught, by a child’s parents. 

The best lessons in life are caught, not taught, by a child’s parents.

See you in the 

next issue in 

July!!

The Contemporary Man Magazine june 2018

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