RIC-20211 Primary Writing Year 5 – Recounts

1 Recounts
TEACHERS NOTES
Structural and language features are shown on the left and right of the text below.
Title
Orientation –
who, when, where,
why
Events –
signifi cant events in
detail
Conclusion –
often with an
evaluative comment
A very strange creature
I saw the most amazing thing when I walked home from training yesterday! Sasha
and I had just reached the corner of our street when we saw a crowd of people
looking up into the trees along the footpath.
We had to stop and fi nd out what was so interesting, so we moved through the
crowd until we got close to the front where we had a better view.
Sitting happily in the branches of one of the trees was the strangest creature I had
ever seen! It was only about as big as my school ruler and had a pink face. It had
yellow hands and feet. The fur on its back was grey and it had black fur around
its mouth and nose. It even had tufts of white fur on its ears! Leaves shook as it
scrambled madly backwards and forwards among the branches. Twittering and
shrieking noises could be heard coming from behind the leaves.
The crowd chatted to each other and pointed at the creature.
Old Mrs Tonkins and Mr Dial carried out a lively discussion about what type of
creature it was and whether it was dangerous, while others muttered that Robert
needed to be quick about ringing the animal protection board.
We all kept our eyes on the creature while we waited, afraid that it might disappear
before help could arrive.
After about twenty minutes, a truck could be heard coming up the street. We all
stepped out of the way and watched two men emerge. They went to the back of
the truck and got out a wire cage, a large net and a ladder and harness.
The smallest man propped the ladder against the nearest tree and quietly climbed
into the lower branches. Once he was seated safely in the fork of the tree, he
attached the harness to a strong branch. His partner passed the net up to him and
he manoeuvred it until it was over the top of the creature. When he brought it swiftly
down, trapping the creature between the net and a tree branch. Then he slipped
the net underneath and around the creature and handed it down to his partner. He
pushed the opening of the net into the cage and released the creature.
‘It’s great that you people saw this little fellow’, he stated. ‘Someone climbed over
the zoo fence last night and let out all the monkeys. We’ve been collecting them all
day. These spider monkeys have only just arrived from South America for our breeding
program. They’re the sweetest specimens I’ve ever seen!’
Teacher information
• This recount is written in the form of an eyewitness account.
• Allow the students to read the recount or choose individual
students to read selected sections.
• Discuss the recount, asking students questions to help
them identify the title, orientation, some events and the
conclusion.
• Discuss specifi c language features such as verbs in
the past tense, vocabulary to suggest time passing and
paragraphs to show separate sections. Students should
indicate examples of each.
• Allow students to complete the analysis on page 16.
• Model the process of planning and writing a recount about
a recent school activity such as an assembly or sporting
activity. Model writing it as though it were an eyewitness
account. Include all language features indicated above.
• Ensure students know that the plan is to record ideas only
and the actual writing of the recount will come later.
• Students use page 17 to plan a recount of an unusual event
they have witnessed.
• Students write their recounts, which could be included in a
class newspaper for display in the school library for other
classes to read. (Purpose/Audience/Display)
• A recount of this nature could be written following a
discussion about newspapers and communication. Students
could rewrite newspaper accounts as interesting recounts.
(Context)
• Verbs in the
past tense;
e.g. saw,
walked
• paragraphs
to show
different
sections
• vocabulary
to suggest
passing of
time; e.g.
After about
twenty
minutes,
Then
Answers
Page 16
1-2. Teacher check
3. (a) Teacher check
(b) Answers will vary but the capture of the monkey is
given in great detail.
(c) Answers will include ‘propped’, ‘climbed’, ‘was seated’,
‘attached’, ‘passed’, ‘manoeuvred’, ‘was’, ‘brought’,
slipped’, ‘handed’, ‘pushed’ and ‘released’.
4. The conclusion tells us that he thinks that the creatures are
‘sweet’.
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PRIMARY WRITING