Angelus News | December 20, 2019 | Vol. 4 No. 43

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children when it comes to faith. When
parents have faith, get joy from their
beliefs, and instill empathy, gratitude,
and hope through those beliefs, their
children will follow. Not immediately
(particularly in adolescence when teens
need to rebel), but eventually.
If parents do not push too hard and do
not punish their children for temporarily
rejecting their faith, chickens
will come home to roost. If, however,
parents feel rejected, get angry, and
retaliate when their children reject
religion, they may win the battle but
will not win the war.
Structure, but with a lighter touch, is
always best for children. The best way
to teach your children is by modeling
how faith enriches your own lives as
parents.
Lopez: How does Mr. Rogers help
with faith? Is it impossible to understand
him without it?
Komisar: Mr. Rogers was a minister
and a man of faith, and though he
did not advertise that in his TV show,
he enacted all of the values of a man
who believed in the goodness of all
human beings. His sensitivity, empathy,
acceptance of others, and belief in the
intrinsic value of all children was an
expression of his religious beliefs. It
would be impossible to separate the
man from his beliefs.
Lopez: Is there something especially
important for people to understand
about family and parenting today?
Komisar: Your children need you
more than you think they do. That
does not mean you have to be there
every second, nor does it mean you
should become a hovering, intrusive,
or anxious parent.
What it does mean is that we have
gotten our priorities all wrong. Time
is a barometer of what we value. If you
spend only 90 minutes per day with
your child and work 10 hours per day,
then work is your priority.
The question I ask parents is not, “Do
you love your children?” because the
answer for the most part is “Yes.” The
question I ask parents is, “Are you really
interested in your child or childhood?
Do you enjoy just being with them and
playing with them?”
If the answer is “Not so much,” then
I know I have a good deal of work to
do with that parent to understand the
pain that adult experienced as a child
whose own parents were not interested
in spending time with them.
Our children need our time, but
more importantly they need us to be
interested in them above all things,
and they know when we are not. They
know when they are not our priority,
and it is incredibly painful to children.
Lopez: Nothing we’re talking about
here is ideological or partisan. Do you
have any hope for common ground
on some of these things? That maybe
this new movie and the positive public
impression of Mr. Rogers bears hope
for something better for our politics
and culture, including social media,
and lives?
Komisar: Understanding and acceptance
of differences and kindness
toward one another is what is missing
today. We are more similar than we
are different. It is not until we can see
many perspectives that we can bring
communities together.
We share basic human values and
have similar goals as humans: to feel
understood, to be acknowledged, to be
accepted, and to live with our universal
needs of freedom, health, dignity, and
safety met.
Our common humanity is greater
than our differences.
Angelus contributor Kathryn Jean
Lopez is a senior fellow at the National
Review Institute, editor-at-large of
National Review, and author of “A Year
with the Mystics: Visionary Wisdom for
Daily Living” (Tan Books, $44.95).
20 • ANGELUS • December 20, 2019