Before I Fall

“Where did you go, anyway?” I’m feeling more annoyed than I should by everything: by the fact
that my friends ditched me after thirty whole seconds, by the fact that Austin's so drunk, by the fact
that Lauren's still talking to Lucy Vives, even though she’s supposed to be obsessively in love with
me. Not that I want her to be in love with me, obviously.
It’s just a constant that’s always been comforting, in a weird way. I wrestle the bottle out of
Ally’s bag and take another sip.
“We made a round. There’s, like, seventeen different rooms up here. You should check it out.”
Ally looks at me, notices the face I’m pulling, and holds up her hands. “What? It’s not like we
abandoned you in the middle of nowhere.”
She’s right. I don’t know why I’m feeling so pissy. “Where did Dinah and Mani go?”
“Normani's suctioned to Muffin’s lap. And Dinah and Siope are fighting.”
“Already?”
“Yeah, well, they kissed for the first three minutes. They waited until minute four to start going
at it.”
This cracks me up and Ally and I laugh over it. I start to feel better, more comfortable. The vodka
fills my head with warmth. More people are arriving all the time and the room seems to be
revolving just a little bit. It’s a nice feeling, though, like being on a really slow carousel. Ally and I
decide to go on a mission to save Dinah before her fight with Siope turns into an all-out brawl.
It seems like the whole school has shown up, but really there are only sixty or seventy kids. This
is the most that ever shows up at a party. There’s the top and middle of the senior class, popularitywise—Lauren's
just holding on to the lower rung of the ladder, but she’s hosting so it’s okay—
some of the cooler juniors, and a couple of really cool sophomores. I know I’m supposed to hate
them, like we were hated when we were sophomores at all the senior parties, but I can’t bring
myself to care. Ally gives a group of them one of her ice stares as we go by, though, and says
“Skanks” loudly. One of them, Sabrina Carpenter, supposedly hooked up with Troy Ogletree not
long ago.
Obviously no freshmen are allowed in. The social bottom doesn’t show either. It isn’t because
people would make fun of them, although they probably would. It’s more than that. They don’t
hear about these parties until after they’ve happened. They don’t know the things we know: they
don’t know about the secret side entrance to Nick Jonas' guesthouse, or the fact that Miranda
Cosgrove stashed a cooler in her garage where you can keep your beers cold, or the fact that
Rocky’s doesn’t check IDs very closely, or the fact that Mic’s stays open around the clock and
makes the best egg and cheeses in the world, absolutely dripping with oil and ketchup, perfect for
when you’re drunk. It’s like high school holds two different worlds, revolving around each other
and never touching: the haves and the have-nots. I guess it’s a good thing. High school is supposed
to prepare you for the real world, after all.
There are so many tiny hallways and rooms, it feels like a maze. All of them are filled with
people and smoke. Only one door is closed. It has a big KEEP OUT sign plastered on it over a
bunch of weird bumper stickers that say things like VISUALIZE WHIRLED PEAS and KISS
ME. I’M CUBAN.
By the time we get to Dinah, she and Siope have made up, big surprise. She’s sitting on his lap
and he’s smoking a joint. Mani and Steve Dough are in a corner. He’s leaning against the wall and
she’s half dancing and half grinding against him. She has an unlit cigarette dangling from her lips,