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<strong>May</strong> <strong>31</strong>, <strong>2020</strong><br />
Essential<br />
Hair Care Tips<br />
This Rainy<br />
Season<br />
Grey<br />
Matters<br />
NAOMI<br />
OSEMEDUA:<br />
On Mission To ‘Die Empty’
7<br />
3<br />
6<br />
IN THIS ISSUE<br />
email: <strong>allure</strong>fortheworld@vanguardngr.com<br />
HAPPINESS<br />
4 Cover: Naomi Osemedua:<br />
On Mission To ‘Die Empty’<br />
6 Sexmatics: Couples’ Therapy<br />
Amidst Covid-19 Pandemic<br />
CELEBRATION<br />
3 Fashion : Grey Matters<br />
7 Beauty : Essential Hair Care Tips<br />
This Rainy Season<br />
<strong>31</strong> MAY <strong>2020</strong><br />
8 Instagram Moments<br />
WELCOME...<br />
Quotes<br />
It’s the last Sunday in the month of<br />
<strong>May</strong> and life continues amidst the<br />
COVID-19 pandemic. How our lives<br />
have so changed in the space of over<br />
two months! Men and women are still<br />
adjusting to the new lifestyle; maskwearing,<br />
regular hand washing, use of<br />
sanitizers, and maintaining social<br />
distancing.<br />
Work life has moved online while<br />
workers and employers try to find a<br />
middle ground. Students have literarily<br />
moved online to meet their teachers,<br />
while parents become physical teachers at home. Religious<br />
leaders have also moved online to meet members of their<br />
congregations as sermons are streamed live for viewers’<br />
enjoyment ditto with entertainers— comedians, musicians and<br />
movie stars. Welcome to the new normal!<br />
But for some like our cover personality today, the new<br />
normal has been her reality and way of life for some years now.<br />
A complete digital native, Naomi Osemedua is an Online<br />
Visibility Strategist and story teller whose passion for live<br />
streaming has been globally acknowledged, earning her the<br />
label, “Africa’s Queen of Live streaming”.<br />
In spite of her success story, Naomi had a rough past that<br />
has become an inspiring story to thousands of her followers.<br />
She talks to our reporter, Josephine Agbonkhese on her life and<br />
mission. Pg. 4-5<br />
It’s been raining cats and dogs and every woman needs to<br />
pay extra attention to her hair. Tope Ojo writes on hair care tips<br />
to help women weather the season. Pg. 7<br />
What is our Sex Coach up to this<br />
week? If you are curious, flip over to J . E<br />
page 6. Adesuwa serves it hot and<br />
Jemi Ekunkunbor<br />
spicy.<br />
lookposh2017@gmail.com<br />
Enjoy our package and have a<br />
08052201126<br />
great week.<br />
“Faith moves mountains<br />
but you have to keep<br />
pushing while you are<br />
praying”.<br />
- Mason Cooley<br />
“Always be ready to<br />
learn. There is no age<br />
for learning and no end<br />
to learning”.<br />
- Dr Roopleen<br />
“War and drink are<br />
the two things man is<br />
never too poor to<br />
buy”.<br />
- William Faulkner<br />
“He who does not<br />
understand your silence<br />
will probably not<br />
understand your<br />
words”.<br />
- Elbert Hubbard<br />
6<br />
EDITOR<br />
JEMI EKUNKUNBOR<br />
ASST. EDITOR<br />
YEMISI SULEIMAN<br />
REPORTER<br />
Josephine Agbonkhese<br />
CONTRIBUTORS<br />
LINDA ORAJEKWE<br />
ADESUWA EWOIGBOKHAN<br />
BAMIYO ISELEMA EMINA<br />
CONT. EDITOR<br />
LATASHA NGWUBE<br />
TEAM<br />
COPY EDITOR<br />
DODOIYI WILLIAM-WEST<br />
LAYOUT / DESIGN<br />
OLAYIWOLA AJAGBE<br />
PHOTO<br />
OSCAR OCHIOGU<br />
(08034746487)<br />
HEAD MARKETING<br />
JANET NAJOMOH<br />
(08037156911)<br />
HEAD OF PRODUCTION<br />
CHARLES KAMMA<br />
Printed and published by Vanguard Media Ltd<br />
Vanguard Avenue Kirikiri Canal; P.M.B 1007 Apapa, Lagos.
Grey<br />
FASHION<br />
matters<br />
When it comes to sophisticated<br />
fashion, grey always seems to be the<br />
forgotten neutral.<br />
However, because of it’s versatility,<br />
grey can work with so many other<br />
colours, prints, and accessories.<br />
You can be assured that a great outfit<br />
will pop up when you decide to pair<br />
your grey outfits with other colours.<br />
Pair with<br />
Silver to<br />
a wedding<br />
Very sophisticated and<br />
elegant combination are<br />
ornaments and shoes<br />
of silver shades. They<br />
might not make your<br />
outfit brighter, but it will<br />
look noble, feminine and<br />
very stylish.<br />
By - Rita Okoye<br />
Pair with Black<br />
for your<br />
cocktail event<br />
The classic combination of<br />
black accessories are amazing<br />
with a grey dress. They will be<br />
appropriate in any case, especially<br />
a cocktail event or hangout with<br />
the girls.<br />
chioma<br />
goodhair<br />
Pair with<br />
yellow for a<br />
casual look<br />
Yellow details look great on<br />
a grey dress. In this case,<br />
it is appropriate to choose<br />
any one accessory of<br />
yellow colour, like shoes.<br />
You can also dilute the<br />
yellow with a black<br />
bag.<br />
<strong>May</strong> <strong>31</strong>, <strong>2020</strong> / 3
INTERVIEW<br />
Naomi Osemedua :<br />
On Mission To ‘Die Empty’<br />
Words By - Josephine Agbonkhese<br />
Her stock in trade is storytelling. A renowned global storyteller, Naomi Osemedua is<br />
Founder, The Women With Stories, and CEO/Creative Director, Sparkle With<br />
Naomi. She was a two-time TEDx speaker and in one of those times, she was the only<br />
black chosen from the African continent to inspire hundreds of Americans who gathered at<br />
Rhodes Island, USA, and millions from other continents who watched Live.<br />
Over a decade ago, Osemedua in her 20s, was a domestically abused and shattered mother of<br />
two with no identity whatsoever. Years later, she found her voice through live streaming,<br />
became a global phenomenon and by 2016, had been globally labelled Africa’s Queen of<br />
Live streaming. Today, she is a highly sought-after Online Visibility Strategist.<br />
The alumna of Ambrose Ali University, Dale Carnegie Institute, University of Cape Town<br />
Graduate School of Business and Dr Myles Munroe Global Leadership Mentoring<br />
Programme, here, opens up about her life, exploits and mission.<br />
Did you foresee the future when you opted for a<br />
virtual line of career?<br />
This is such an interesting question and I guess this<br />
is how people get named “The Futurist’. When I started,<br />
live streaming definitely wasn’t popular and there was<br />
no Facebook Live or Instagram Live. The platform was<br />
called Periscope, and there was a World Map that<br />
allowed people to see who was Live around the world. I<br />
had so many instances when people would come into<br />
my broadcast and tell me that I am the only one Live on<br />
the entire African continent at that moment. There were<br />
other Africans when I started: but, we were a handful<br />
and I was quite consistent with showing up twice daily.<br />
So, chances were high to find me Live alone.<br />
Who would have imagined a time when we would<br />
be forced to do business online? One thing is certain: I<br />
am thankful I stayed on even when it didn’t make sense<br />
to many.<br />
Everyone is already streaming live these days, do<br />
you still consider your title as Africa’s Queen of<br />
Live streaming relevant?<br />
I remain the undisputed Queen (Laughs). That title<br />
came after my channel on Periscope.tv trended on April<br />
11, 2016, making me the first African woman to trend on<br />
the platform. The world has come to embrace the<br />
various livestreaming platforms; but once a Queen,<br />
always a Queen!<br />
What personal characteristics made livestreaming a<br />
walkover for you?<br />
My curiosity got me started, my courage kept me on<br />
even when it wasn’t popular, my love for adventure kept<br />
me intrigued and desiring more, and my life mission to<br />
‘die empty’, keeps me moving and growing stronger.<br />
Your story of running away from home, eloping and<br />
surviving domestic abuse brought you to the spotlight.<br />
What issues form the centre of your discussions<br />
these days?<br />
My story has been a gift I continue to inspire the<br />
world with as I discovered my cure. All I want to do is<br />
give people hope that their mistakes and pasts do not<br />
have to define their future. Today, I am passionate<br />
about disrupting the mindset that keeps people locked<br />
in boxes and refusing to be seen. I have met so many<br />
great people who are not known, and are not being<br />
seen and heard; which means all they have to make<br />
this world a better place may never be felt.<br />
I want Africans to let go of the ‘dark continent<br />
narrative’; trash the labels and step from the backstage<br />
to center stage. The spotlight does not forbid you!<br />
I observed your title has changed from Queen of<br />
Live streaming to Online Visibility Strategist. Why<br />
the change?<br />
My brand continues to evolve, and I still focus on the<br />
power of Live Videos but the work is deeper now. I<br />
wanted a more encompassing word that describes my<br />
work. As an Online Visibility Strategist, I work with my<br />
clients in the area of mindset, gaining mastery of their<br />
‘big ideas’, their brand message and of course, using<br />
the tool of livestreaming. I discovered that when the<br />
foundation is not right, people can’t show up confidently<br />
and they wonder why it’s not working for them. I went<br />
from being a stay-at-home mum, to becoming a<br />
two-time TEDx Speaker and a Global Brand<br />
Ambassador. In the last three years, I have spoken on<br />
four continents while predominantly operating from my<br />
home office. So, clearly, the principles work when<br />
applied the right way. I have mastered it and now, I am<br />
on a mission to help others too.<br />
As more brands move their services online, what<br />
must be borne in mind in the quest for visibility?<br />
I love this question; it’s one that I have had to<br />
answer in this season of uncertainty almost daily. First,<br />
start with Why! Why do you want to leverage online<br />
platforms? Apart from the obvious, what’s your mission<br />
and vision for your business?<br />
The next thing I want to share is also very critical.<br />
Stop trying to speak to everybody! You end up speaking<br />
to nobody. Instead, understand what we call the 3P’s.<br />
The Person- Who are you here to serve? The Pain-<br />
What are their Pain Points? The Pleasure- Your unique<br />
way of serving your clients through your programs,<br />
services, etc.<br />
What circumstances led you to Periscope and<br />
made you maximise it?<br />
I would say it was time and chance at the beginning.<br />
I remember the first time I heard about the platform<br />
through a Global Business Coach I was learning from<br />
4<br />
/ <strong>May</strong> <strong>31</strong>, <strong>2020</strong>
INTERVIEW<br />
INTERVIEW<br />
Naomi Osemedua :<br />
On Mission To ‘Die Empty’<br />
Words By - Josephine Agbonkhese<br />
on Facebook. She mentioned it as a new platform that<br />
she wanted to use to build her business and I simply<br />
went to check it out. At first, I was afraid because I<br />
wasn’t even social media savvy, but I was intrigued at<br />
how with the touch of a button, I could have the world<br />
come to me.<br />
Could you recount your experience for those<br />
reading about you for the first time?<br />
November 10, 2000, is a day I will never forget even<br />
though this is the 20th year. I ran away from home and<br />
eloped against my family’s wish. I was 22-year-old, still<br />
in the university and with no guarantee of what was<br />
ahead.<br />
My pparents took a tough decision and made it clear<br />
that since I chose my path, I had to live with it. I can’t<br />
even begin to share what my family went through in that<br />
season just because of that singular decision.<br />
In 2009, I made a bold decision to walk away from<br />
the union. By age <strong>31</strong>, I was divorced with two sons and<br />
wondering what to do with my life. It was a truly dark<br />
season and I slowly had to pick-up the pieces of my life.<br />
Her stock in trade is storytelling. A renowned global storyteller, Naomi Osemedua is<br />
Founder, The Women With Stories, and CEO/Creative Director, Sparkle With<br />
Naomi. She was a two-time TEDx speaker and in one of those times, she was the only<br />
black chosen from the African continent to inspire hundreds of Americans who gathered at<br />
Rhodes Island, USA, and millions from other continents who watched Live.<br />
Over a decade ago, Osemedua in her 20s, was a domestically abused and shattered mother of<br />
two with no identity whatsoever. Years later, she found her voice through live streaming,<br />
became a global phenomenon and by 2016, had been globally labelled Africa’s Queen of<br />
Live streaming. Today, she is a highly sought-after Online Visibility Strategist.<br />
The alumna of Ambrose Ali University, Dale Carnegie Institute, University of Cape Town<br />
Graduate School of Business and Dr Myles Munroe Global Leadership Mentoring<br />
Programme, here, opens up about her life, exploits and mission.<br />
Did you foresee the future when you opted for a<br />
virtual line of career?<br />
This is such an interesting question and I guess this<br />
is how people get named “The Futurist’. When I started,<br />
live streaming definitely wasn’t popular and there was<br />
no Facebook Live or Instagram Live. The platform was<br />
called Periscope, and there was a World Map that<br />
allowed people to see who was Live around the world. I<br />
had so many instances when people would come into<br />
my broadcast and tell me that I am the only one Live on<br />
the entire African continent at that moment. There were<br />
other Africans when I started: but, we were a handful<br />
and I was quite consistent with showing up twice daily.<br />
So, chances were high to find me Live alone.<br />
Who would have imagined a time when we would<br />
be forced to do business online? One thing is certain: I<br />
am thankful I stayed on even when it didn’t make sense<br />
to many.<br />
Everyone is already streaming live these days, do<br />
you still consider your title as Africa’s Queen of<br />
Live streaming relevant?<br />
I remain the undisputed Queen (Laughs). That title<br />
came after my channel on Periscope.tv trended on April<br />
11, 2016, making me the first African woman to trend on<br />
the platform. The world has come to embrace the<br />
various livestreaming platforms; but once a Queen,<br />
always a Queen!<br />
What personal characteristics made livestreaming a<br />
walkover for you?<br />
My curiosity got me started, my courage kept me on<br />
even when it wasn’t popular, my love for adventure kept<br />
me intrigued and desiring more, and my life mission to<br />
‘die empty’, keeps me moving and growing stronger.<br />
Your story of running away from home, eloping and<br />
surviving domestic abuse brought you to the spotlight.<br />
What issues form the centre of your discussions<br />
these days?<br />
My story has been a gift I continue to inspire the<br />
world with as I discovered my cure. All I want to do is<br />
give people hope that their mistakes and pasts do not<br />
have to define their future. Today, I am passionate<br />
about disrupting the mindset that keeps people locked<br />
in boxes and refusing to be seen. I have met so many<br />
great people who are not known, and are not being<br />
seen and heard; which means all they have to make<br />
this world a better place may never be felt.<br />
I want Africans to let go of the ‘dark continent<br />
narrative’; trash the labels and step from the backstage<br />
to center stage. The spotlight does not forbid you!<br />
I observed your title has changed from Queen of<br />
Live streaming to Online Visibility Strategist. Why<br />
the change?<br />
My brand continues to evolve, and I still focus on the<br />
power of Live Videos but the work is deeper now. I<br />
wanted a more encompassing word that describes my<br />
work. As an Online Visibility Strategist, I work with my<br />
clients in the area of mindset, gaining mastery of their<br />
‘big ideas’, their brand message and of course, using<br />
the tool of livestreaming. I discovered that when the<br />
foundation is not right, people can’t show up confidently<br />
and they wonder why it’s not working for them. I went<br />
from being a stay-at-home mum, to becoming a<br />
two-time TEDx Speaker and a Global Brand<br />
Ambassador. In the last three years, I have spoken on<br />
four continents while predominantly operating from my<br />
home office. So, clearly, the principles work when<br />
applied the right way. I have mastered it and now, I am<br />
on a mission to help others too.<br />
As more brands move their services online, what<br />
must be borne in mind in the quest for visibility?<br />
I love this question; it’s one that I have had to<br />
answer in this season of uncertainty almost daily. First,<br />
start with Why! Why do you want to leverage online<br />
platforms? Apart from the obvious, what’s your mission<br />
and vision for your business?<br />
The next thing I want to share is also very critical.<br />
Stop trying to speak to everybody! You end up speaking<br />
to nobody. Instead, understand what we call the 3P’s.<br />
The Person- Who are you here to serve? The Pain-<br />
What are their Pain Points? The Pleasure- Your unique<br />
way of serving your clients through your programs,<br />
services, etc.<br />
What circumstances led you to Periscope and<br />
made you maximise it?<br />
I would say it was time and chance at the beginning.<br />
I remember the first time I heard about the platform<br />
through a Global Business Coach I was learning from<br />
So, what has happened since then?<br />
So much has happened in the 11 years since I<br />
walked away. I got reunited with my family and my dad,<br />
mum and siblings continue to be my greatest pillar of<br />
strength. I am so grateful to them for the gift of<br />
forgiveness I received, knowing how deep the wounds I<br />
cut were. We share such a special bond today that an<br />
outsider would never imagine a time when things fell<br />
apart.<br />
In 2013, I found love again. Today, I am happily<br />
married to my husband Richard, a soon-to-be world<br />
renowned Chef, and we have been blessed with two<br />
more children.<br />
From your experience, what do you think of the role<br />
of parental consent in marriage; in choosing a<br />
partner so to speak?<br />
This is not a one size fits all response so no one<br />
misses my point. Personally, I made a terrible mistake<br />
not listening to my parents and I know many might<br />
consider this old school but being a parent today, I<br />
understand the importance of honour. It’s possible that<br />
there are extreme cases where the parents may really<br />
not mean well but I believe in the multitude of<br />
Counselors there is safety.<br />
Wisdom is profitable for direction and when push<br />
comes to shove- find the voice of reasoning. There may<br />
be people who can listen and share a different<br />
perspective with your parents. At the end of the day,<br />
choosing a partner is your decision but getting to honor<br />
your parents is also crucial in the process.<br />
Let us talk about growing; what was it like and what<br />
part of it forms your most cherished moment?<br />
Growing up is filled with so many beautiful<br />
memories that I cherish to this day. I was born in Zaria,<br />
then my parents moved to Warri before I turned one. I<br />
am the first girl among six children. I like to think of<br />
myself as “Daddy’s Girl’ although my sisters and I are<br />
all Daddy’s Girls. My father never treated us any less<br />
because he had all five of us and just one son. My only<br />
brother remains a strong support for all his little sisters<br />
and I am truly thankful. My mum was a professional<br />
teacher and a disciplinarian too.<br />
In 1989, my father was transferred to work in Brunei<br />
Darussalam and I spent the most part of my teenage<br />
years there. One of my most cherished moments<br />
growing up would have to be my 12th birthday. My<br />
school had organised a mountain hiking exhibition to<br />
Malaysia and my father gladly supported that trip.<br />
Unknown to us, the tour company had carried a<br />
birthday cake up the mountain and as we got to the rest<br />
house at 11,000ft above sea level, they woke us up for<br />
a celebration. It was my 12th birthday and right there on<br />
Mt. Kinabalu, the highest peak in South East Asia, I<br />
celebrated my special day. I am still trying to beat that<br />
record. I am open to any ideas for my 42nd as it will be<br />
30 years this August.<br />
I want Africans<br />
to let go of the<br />
‘dark continent<br />
narrative’;<br />
trash the labels<br />
and step from<br />
the backstage<br />
to center stage.<br />
When you’re not working, what do you like to do?<br />
I love to spend time with my family and friends that I<br />
call Soul Sisters. They are in different parts of the world;<br />
but, every moment spent together is treasured. I love to<br />
read books that inspire me. I am a book addict. Don’t<br />
ever take me shopping and start from a bookstore; be<br />
rest assured that will be the only store we would step<br />
into until it’s time to go home.<br />
Your favourite travel destination?<br />
I’m torn between New York and Dubai simply<br />
because they are cities that inspire me. I draw a lot of<br />
inspiration from my surroundings and you just can’t see<br />
enough in these two cities.<br />
What’s your most priced and cherished fashion<br />
item?<br />
Is it okay to say I don’t own any that I will term most<br />
priced and cherished? I love to look good and<br />
everything I own that helps me achieve that is on the<br />
list.<br />
What won’t Naomi ever be caught wearing?<br />
A bright yellow dress...for now.<br />
4<br />
/ <strong>May</strong> <strong>31</strong>, <strong>2020</strong><br />
<strong>May</strong> <strong>31</strong>, <strong>2020</strong> / 5
INTERVIEW<br />
on Facebook. She mentioned it as a new platform that<br />
she wanted to use to build her business and I simply<br />
went to check it out. At first, I was afraid because I<br />
wasn’t even social media savvy, but I was intrigued at<br />
how with the touch of a button, I could have the world<br />
come to me.<br />
Could you recount your experience for those<br />
reading about you for the first time?<br />
November 10, 2000, is a day I will never forget even<br />
though this is the 20th year. I ran away from home and<br />
eloped against my family’s wish. I was 22-year-old, still<br />
in the university and with no guarantee of what was<br />
ahead.<br />
My pparents took a tough decision and made it clear<br />
that since I chose my path, I had to live with it. I can’t<br />
even begin to share what my family went through in that<br />
season just because of that singular decision.<br />
In 2009, I made a bold decision to walk away from<br />
the union. By age <strong>31</strong>, I was divorced with two sons and<br />
wondering what to do with my life. It was a truly dark<br />
season and I slowly had to pick-up the pieces of my life.<br />
So, what has happened since then?<br />
So much has happened in the 11 years since I<br />
walked away. I got reunited with my family and my dad,<br />
mum and siblings continue to be my greatest pillar of<br />
strength. I am so grateful to them for the gift of<br />
forgiveness I received, knowing how deep the wounds I<br />
cut were. We share such a special bond today that an<br />
outsider would never imagine a time when things fell<br />
apart.<br />
In 2013, I found love again. Today, I am happily<br />
married to my husband Richard, a soon-to-be world<br />
renowned Chef, and we have been blessed with two<br />
more children.<br />
From your experience, what do you think of the role<br />
of parental consent in marriage; in choosing a<br />
partner so to speak?<br />
This is not a one size fits all response so no one<br />
misses my point. Personally, I made a terrible mistake<br />
not listening to my parents and I know many might<br />
consider this old school but being a parent today, I<br />
understand the importance of honour. It’s possible that<br />
there are extreme cases where the parents may really<br />
not mean well but I believe in the multitude of<br />
Counselors there is safety.<br />
Wisdom is profitable for direction and when push<br />
comes to shove- find the voice of reasoning. There may<br />
be people who can listen and share a different<br />
perspective with your parents. At the end of the day,<br />
choosing a partner is your decision but getting to honor<br />
your parents is also crucial in the process.<br />
Let us talk about growing; what was it like and what<br />
part of it forms your most cherished moment?<br />
Growing up is filled with so many beautiful<br />
memories that I cherish to this day. I was born in Zaria,<br />
then my parents moved to Warri before I turned one. I<br />
am the first girl among six children. I like to think of<br />
myself as “Daddy’s Girl’ although my sisters and I are<br />
all Daddy’s Girls. My father never treated us any less<br />
because he had all five of us and just one son. My only<br />
brother remains a strong support for all his little sisters<br />
and I am truly thankful. My mum was a professional<br />
teacher and a disciplinarian too.<br />
In 1989, my father was transferred to work in Brunei<br />
Darussalam and I spent the most part of my teenage<br />
years there. One of my most cherished moments<br />
growing up would have to be my 12th birthday. My<br />
school had organised a mountain hiking exhibition to<br />
Malaysia and my father gladly supported that trip.<br />
Unknown to us, the tour company had carried a<br />
birthday cake up the mountain and as we got to the rest<br />
house at 11,000ft above sea level, they woke us up for<br />
a celebration. It was my 12th birthday and right there on<br />
Mt. Kinabalu, the highest peak in South East Asia, I<br />
celebrated my special day. I am still trying to beat that<br />
record. I am open to any ideas for my 42nd as it will be<br />
30 years this August.<br />
I want Africans<br />
to let go of the<br />
‘dark continent<br />
narrative’;<br />
trash the labels<br />
and step from<br />
the backstage<br />
to center stage.<br />
When you’re not working, what do you like to do?<br />
I love to spend time with my family and friends that I<br />
call Soul Sisters. They are in different parts of the world;<br />
but, every moment spent together is treasured. I love to<br />
read books that inspire me. I am a book addict. Don’t<br />
ever take me shopping and start from a bookstore; be<br />
rest assured that will be the only store we would step<br />
into until it’s time to go home.<br />
Your favourite travel destination?<br />
I’m torn between New York and Dubai simply<br />
because they are cities that inspire me. I draw a lot of<br />
inspiration from my surroundings and you just can’t see<br />
enough in these two cities.<br />
What’s your most priced and cherished fashion<br />
item?<br />
Is it okay to say I don’t own any that I will term most<br />
priced and cherished? I love to look good and<br />
everything I own that helps me achieve that is on the<br />
list.<br />
What won’t Naomi ever be caught wearing?<br />
A bright yellow dress...for now.<br />
<strong>May</strong> <strong>31</strong>, <strong>2020</strong> / 5
with Adesuwa 07011289<strong>31</strong>6 | adesuwaewoigbokhan@hotmail.com<br />
Couples’ Therapy Amidst Covid-19 Pandemic<br />
The corona virus pandemic is beginning to<br />
have a huge impact on couples’ lives, as well<br />
as health and wellbeing of individuals, families<br />
and communities worldwide.<br />
Fortunately enough, this is the perfect time<br />
to reach out to professionals like Sex/Marriage/<br />
Relationship experts who recognize the<br />
changes that are occurring in how partners<br />
access their relationships as result of the<br />
COVID-19 pandemic. This is not narrowed to<br />
just resources, but also to activities of daily of<br />
living such as; communication, mobility, social<br />
isolation, displacement, mental health and well<br />
being.<br />
Sex, Marriage and Relationship therapists<br />
understand the vital need for spouses to use<br />
professional therapy, to sustain good<br />
psychological and mental health. So feel free to<br />
seek them out.<br />
Going for therapy might sound scary<br />
especially because it is associated with a<br />
relationship that’s in a deep-rooted situation. It<br />
can be helpful at any stage of your affair even<br />
when things seem rosy. Getting to an expert<br />
early, helps you get to the root of the problem<br />
before it escalates. Having an open<br />
conversation with a professional will not only<br />
assist you to communicate better with your<br />
spouse, it can also help to avert problems you<br />
once had, once and for all.<br />
Here are some signs that indicate that it’s<br />
time to go for that therapy session.<br />
Are you still arguing about who is to clean up<br />
after eating? Having to share your home 24/7<br />
with someone else is sure to cause differences<br />
and frustration. If you are repeatedly on an<br />
issue that usually leads to screaming, yelling<br />
and attacking, especially in this era of partial<br />
lockdown with curfew at its heels, it is a sign<br />
that you need a therapist.<br />
Reaching out to a therapist will definitely<br />
help put things in perspective. When you<br />
suddenly prefer watching movies to having sex<br />
with your spouse, or you are not quite as into it<br />
as you used to be, or you are nicer to your<br />
colleagues, then it is time to figure out why you<br />
are not connecting sexually. Sex therapist<br />
Vanessa Marin says that when you notice<br />
yourself retreating into personal affairs instead<br />
of making an effort to share your experiences<br />
with your husband, you are ignoring bigger<br />
issues. You may not even realize you’re doing<br />
it, so consider the situation.<br />
If you decide to use separate rooms at<br />
home, co-existing in every room can crush<br />
your stuff, it is cool to need some space, or if<br />
you’re actively avoiding being in the same<br />
room with your spouse, then its time to ask<br />
yourself why.<br />
No one relationship is perfect. Every couple<br />
goes through difficult experiences. We are all<br />
work in progress. The real issue is when you<br />
are pitching your marriage perfection while<br />
holding onto a grudge, and using it against<br />
your better half, consciously trying to make him<br />
or her feel bad. This inability to let go of the<br />
past will affect your matrimony. Here is where<br />
therapist can help you figure out why you’re still<br />
holding on to past feelings, as well as how to<br />
move past it.<br />
When envy becomes the order of the day -<br />
it’s good to get jealous every now and then;<br />
this is completely normal. But when it begins to<br />
affect your relationship with your mate, causing<br />
you to drift apart, then it’s time to see the<br />
therapist in order to find a way of ending such<br />
negative emotion.<br />
Whatever you do, avoid pushing your<br />
feelings to the side, nothing will ever get<br />
resolved if you don’t acknowledge them.<br />
Usually, by the time a couple comes to therapy,<br />
basic causes would have led to more troubles<br />
that could have been avoided.<br />
Couples should seek therapy long before<br />
they think they ‘’need’’ to. Most experts believe<br />
that therapy can actually be a significant part of<br />
your relationship. ‘’Most issues within spouses<br />
often start small; gradually grow in size when<br />
they don’t get resolved. This is where therapy<br />
can help, by giving tools and techniques to<br />
improve conflict resolution’’ explained Kristie<br />
Overstreet, a licensed mental health counselor.<br />
Quite a number of couples always wished they<br />
had sought professional help years or months<br />
earlier.<br />
‘’There are always three sides to every story,<br />
his side, her side and the truth’’ A third party<br />
that is objective, may just be the ticket when<br />
couples feel that they can no longer<br />
communicate effectively.<br />
to be continued...<br />
Talk<br />
SPOT<br />
By - Rita Okoye<br />
What some of your favourite<br />
celebrities said and we listened.<br />
“Dear God of Children, I<br />
can’t wait to have kids, so I<br />
can call them from their<br />
room in the other wing of<br />
the mansion to come and<br />
pass me the remote control<br />
right next to me on the<br />
couch. Father Lord, you<br />
already know I’m user<br />
friendly, use me oh Lord, at<br />
the right time of course.<br />
Alex Ekubo can’t wait<br />
to be a dad.<br />
““I want to tell my younger self -<br />
thank you for not giving up on us.<br />
You fought the good fight and<br />
you passed the mantle on. You<br />
weathered a lot of bullying in<br />
school, never picked in a game,<br />
always relegated to the back<br />
because they didn’t think you<br />
belonged. You kept your head<br />
high and kept going. By God’s<br />
grace I will never fail you,”<br />
Belinda Effah’s message<br />
to her younger self.<br />
“Depression exists. Do not get me<br />
wrong. I am not saying<br />
depression is not real. However,<br />
before accepting the diagnosis,<br />
do everything legal within your<br />
power to make money. I have<br />
never seen anyone cure<br />
depression by taking pills.<br />
However, I have seen depression<br />
VANISH after receipt of bank<br />
alert”.<br />
Reno Omokri on tacking<br />
depression.<br />
“Some people talk to you in<br />
their free time. Some others<br />
free their time to talk to you.<br />
Learn the difference. No one is<br />
ever too busy for the ones they<br />
love. If your lover does not talk<br />
to you everyday. Then you two<br />
ain’t in LOVE”.<br />
Anita Joseph shares<br />
relationship tips.<br />
6<br />
/ <strong>May</strong> <strong>31</strong>, <strong>2020</strong>
Try A New<br />
Hairstyle<br />
BEAUTY<br />
Do Not Skip The<br />
Conditioner<br />
While washing your hair, do not skip the<br />
conditioner. A conditioner will help you in<br />
keeping your hair soft and smooth, and prevent<br />
your hair from any external damage. The right<br />
conditioner according to your hair type can<br />
work wonders for your hair. While applying the<br />
conditioner, make sure that you cover all your<br />
hair properly from roots to the tip of the hair.<br />
Change To A<br />
Wide-Toothed<br />
Comb<br />
If you must choose one comb to carry<br />
around with you, make it a wide-toothed<br />
comb. This comb suits all hair types from<br />
oily to dry and very frizzy. It will allow you<br />
to comb even damp hair with minimal<br />
damage. Save the brushes only for days<br />
you need to blow-dry.<br />
If you were planning to go short,<br />
the rains might be a good time to<br />
experiment with that idea. Short hair<br />
is easy to manage and less prone to<br />
breakage when wet. If you detest the<br />
thought of clipping your long locks, do<br />
try layers which will make your hair<br />
easier to comb and manage.<br />
Oil Your Scalp<br />
Regularly<br />
Oil is the best natural<br />
conditioner that helps in<br />
hair loss treatment. Oil is<br />
the key to maintain strong<br />
hair. It provides strength to<br />
the hair. Choose the right<br />
oil according to your hair<br />
type. If you experience<br />
excess oil in your scalp,<br />
you must first wash your<br />
hair with a mild shampoo.<br />
ANNIE<br />
Essential Hair<br />
Care Tips This<br />
Rainy Season<br />
By - Temitope Ojo<br />
The rainy season is finally here. And though<br />
the rains give relief from the rising<br />
temperature, this season can take a toll on<br />
your hair.Your hair needs extra attention<br />
during the season. The increased moisture in<br />
the air can result in frizzy hair, hair breakage,<br />
and dandruff. You must save yourself from all<br />
these problems.<br />
If you are looking for some simple ways to<br />
keep your hair healthy, here are a few tips<br />
that will sort you out this rainy season.<br />
Stay<br />
Hydrated<br />
We simply can’t stress the<br />
importance of drinking plenty of<br />
water enough. You need at least 2<br />
liters of water per day for healthy cell<br />
function. Mix things up by including<br />
fresh fruit juice, lime soda, green tea,<br />
and coconut water to stay hydrated.<br />
UBONG AMAKA<br />
Eat Protein-Rich Diet<br />
Proteins are very important for<br />
your body muscles, tissues,<br />
and for cell regeneration.<br />
A protein-rich diet will help<br />
you greatly in hair fall control<br />
and in fighting many scalp<br />
diseases. Include eggs, lean<br />
meat, yoghurt, soya, cheese,<br />
fatty fish, spinach, and<br />
mushrooms in your diet as<br />
much as possible.<br />
<strong>May</strong> <strong>31</strong>, <strong>2020</strong> / 7