Signs and Wonders Volume 31#1-2, sample

Signs and Wonders
for Our Times
SPECIAL DOUBLE ISSUE • Vol. 31 No. 1/2 • SPRING/SUMMER 2021
Mercy Meets Childhood Trauma • Medjugorje and the Great Spiritual Reset
Amazing Stories from Purgatory and the Afterlife • Trust in Mary’s Plan
Pray & Fast for America 2021 • Rest in Peace, Fr. Seraphim Michalenko, MIC
Who are the Benedictine Daughters of Divine Will?
Forgotten Lessons from Church History • Remembering Rev. Ubald Rugirangoga
Scottish Bishop Leads 33 Day Consecration using Child’s Consecration Book
Catholic Prophecy Update

Mercy Meets
Childhood Trauma
I Now Know That It
Was Not My Fault
BY ELIZABETH RACINE
It was a match made in heaven. Looking at Mike, a
devout and faith-filled man married to a beautiful,
wise, and loving woman, Mary, life seemed blissful. As
Mary describes her husband, Mike was handsome and
successful with an engaging smile and generous spirit,
a dynamic and lovable man who made many friends
and helped everyone.
His daughter, Terri, relates this story about her father.
“In college, I used to get a ride to school with my dad
on his way to work. He would stop at Dunkin and buy
about 10 cups of coffee to pass out to all of his homeless
friends as we walked down the street. There was a blind
man nicknamed Pencil Pete who sold pencils on the
square in Wilkes Barre. My dad would always stop to
talk to him, give him a few bucks and take a pencil.
One day, I whispered to my dad, ‘Don’t take his pencils,
Dad!’ He waited until we walked away and then said,
‘If I don’t take a pencil, then he’s a beggar. If I do take
one, he’s a business man, like me.’”
“What a lesson in human dignity, and what a hero of
a man.”
Everyone loved him. But, despite all his success and
achievement, there was a deep sadness—a shadow
that cast a pall over his life, affecting every part of
him. Inside, he didn’t feel worthy, and had trouble
validating himself. It wasn’t always visible, but those
who knew him best could sense it.
In sharing Mike’s story, Mary shows how God’s fatherly
love and mercy can restore what was stolen from us
and bring us to wholeness – even after our death. And,
through His eternal love, God can bring healing and
solace to those who are left behind to mourn.
The Mosaic
Do you ever feel that the events in your life are random
or haphazard, with no order or pattern? How seemingly
unrelated events of our lives, some joyful and others filled
with anguish, jumble together to create this thing called life.
Mary used to feel this way, too, but she was given a grace to
see how the Lord uses all those random pieces of our lives
to form a MOSAIC—a beautiful work of art using all those
random pieces from our lives, the good and the bad, the
bright and the dark, to create a Masterpiece. How can we view
it? Through the gift of Faith.
A Love Story
At age 17, Mary married Mike, 18, an athletic, handsome,
intelligent, and devout Catholic young man with a heart of
gold; the future was full of the promise of young love. There
was no question they would have a happy life. Today, 13
children, 50 grandchildren, and 6 great grandchildren later,
Mary relates, “It’s hard to go down memory lane. The story
about my husband is just…so much. From a secular point of
view, he went through hell and back again, you know, with
that illness. I am just praying it can help somebody else.”
While theirs is a legacy of love and sacrifice, pain and joy, it is
highlighted with heavenly reminders of God’s love and mercy.
This is their story.
Despite All His Success and Achievement,
a Deep Sadness
As Mary and Mike raised their 13 children in the Catholic
faith, they sent them to Catholic school from grade school to
high school, and then on to college. Mary held down the fort
at home as Mike excelled in his various positions at work; his
employer sent him to New York City for six months to train to
become a stockbroker, where he was first in his class.
Check out our website every day! www.sign.org 5

Over the years, Mary realized that although Mike attracted people
like a magnet, and had a heart for the needy and the down and
out, he initially had trouble trusting people until he got to know
them well.
Mary also saw what was not visible to the casual observer – that
Mike struggled with feelings of inadequacy. “Although he did
everything so well, in spite of all his successes, he never felt
adequate,” she said.
Mike (center) as a young boy
It took Mike 20 years after they were married to be able to
open up to his wife about the unnamed childhood trauma that
formed the root of his pain. He shared the painful memories that
haunted him from his childhood.
His father was sent overseas to fight the South Pacific in the Navy
during World War II, leaving Mike’s mother alone to raise four
children in his absence. As was the custom, she took in a girl from
the country to help out during this time. Mike told Mary about
how that teenage girl sexually abused him and his older sister
when Mike was 5, and his sister, 7.
At last Mary understood. “Because of the damage done to this
innocent five-year-old little boy… by the teenage girl who worked
in their home, he never felt worthy of love.”
Mike & Mary with 6 of their 13 children
Mary with 6 of her daughters
And, because such things were not discussed or handled properly
back then, he blamed himself.
His young life continued to be marked with grief and loss. After
the War, Mike’s father returned home to re-establish his medical
practice, but died from an infection shortly afterwards. After the
funeral, Mike’s family went to Connecticut to spend a few days
visiting his Uncle Jack and his family. As soon as they arrived
back home, the phone was ringing to say his Uncle Jack had died
by his own hand—suicide. Says Mary, “Mike never got over his
death—that was his best friend.” The double tragedy of two male
figures in his life dying within a very short time of each other took
a tremendous toll, leaving Mike, 14, with a deep father wound.
Repercussions
Mike was 29 years old when he had his first Bipolar ‘episode.’
“Suffice it to say, it was like he just went into this [other] world,”
says Mary, who at the time was pregnant with their eighth child.
“They didn’t really know what to do—even my father, a physician,
flew out to try to help, but he didn’t know what to do, either.
Bipolar Disorder was not talked about back then,” says Mary,
“They didn’t really talk about a lot of things that they should have
talked about back then. There was no talk about medication at
that time. He just went through it.”
Mike
The Rosary Becomes a Lifeline
During that time, out of “sheer desperation,” Mike and Mary said
the Rosary every night. “I was expecting my eighth child, and
6 Spring/Summer 2021 • Signs and Wonders for Our Times

I think the oldest one was in first
grade, so they were all babies. All we
knew to do was to pray, pray, pray—
saying the Rosary every night—not
because we were so holy, but because
we were so desperate— every night it
was the same thing: we would just say
the Rosary, and say the Rosary…”
“And then he was OK.”
Mary feels that the Rosary, along with
the birth of their eighth child, helped
lift his depression. The couple love
children, and the family continued
having and raising their children
and living their life, dealing with
future ‘episodes’ as best they could.
The couple felt that God sent them
all those children to heal him. Mary
says, “It feels that this was God’s way of
saying, ‘You didn’t have a father, but I
will show you how to be a father.’ And
Mike became a beautiful father—nothing
was too good for his kids.”
Healing the Father Wound
Mary recalls that Mike would take
walks in the woods every morning.
She feels he was always searching for
his father. She would ask him why he
went there.
“I’m on a search,” Mike would reply.
When Mary asked what he was
searching for, Mike would say,
“We’ll see!”
One day Mike came home from his
walk and excitedly told Mary that
he’d “just felt the most profound love
he’s ever felt. He described it as being
bathed in the ‘paternalistic nature
of God.’ He told me he felt safe and
loved as never before.”
Carrying the Cross in
the Last Three Years
of His Life
“The last three years of his life, Mike
was carrying the cross,” said Mary.
July 2001, Mary and Mike were
grateful to be able to make it to the
nine-day Novena for the Feast of St.
Ann, like they did each year. But the
next day, July 26, 2001, the Feast of St.
Ann, was the beginning of everything.
Mike woke up with such a heaviness
in his chest that we went to the
Emergency Room. They discovered
a massive blockage in his heart that
required bypass surgery. They didn’t
think he was going to make it because
his oxygen level was so low. But he
survived, and was in intensive care.
At least he was alive.
Once he was well enough, he went
into cardiac rehab with the goal of
getting him back on his feet, but
his recovery was not a smooth one.
The heart attack’s lingering effects
included worsening of his depression
and other personality changes. Mike
was not a compliant patient.
“Mike went from being a dynamic
man who was used to running the
show, to a man with low confidence,
and terrible anxiety, who sank into
depression and delusional thinking,”
said Mary.
Due to the medications he took for
depression, Mike had developed
Diabetes, which brought on the
additional challenge of sores on his
feet and legs.
“We were under attack,” She said quietly.
Her answer? Prayer.
“God wants you to be whole and good
and happy. So, whenever anything
is happening—a challenge in life—
what did I learn? No matter what the
situation, Prayer is always the answer.
Go to God in prayer.”
“The devil tries to get a foothold through
depression; and that’s where I feel the
power of prayer—it’s truly like a battle. I
would say many times, ‘Begone, Satan—
he belongs to Jesus!’ Just the utterance
of the holy name of Jesus or the Blessed
Mother, and the devil shrinks.”
During this period of recovery, Mike
was moved from hospital to hospital,
from one treatment center or care
home to the next, seeking the care
he needed for a full recovery—both
physically and mentally. Mary would
drive an hour each way to visit Mike.
A Spot of Joy Amidst the
Suffering—Padre Pio
Mike was moved into a wonderful
personal care home run by a religious
order of Sisters. Physically, the
sores on his legs from the Diabetes
continued, and had reached a point
where his medical team was trying
to determine if it would be possible
to save his leg, or if it would need to
be amputated. At this time, he was
seriously clinically depressed; nothing
seemed to be helping.
During this time, their daughter
Susan, who is an artist and a writer,
sold one of her beautiful paintings
at her art exhibition, a portrait of
Padre Pio. The buyer, a woman with a
strong devotion to the saint, offered
to come visit Susan’s father to bless
him with a first-class relic of Padre
Pio. She visited, prayed over Mike
and placed the relic on his forehead.
Mary recalls saying to Mike afterwards,
“Wasn’t it so nice that she
came? Padre Pio—Padre Pio just
came to visit you!” “But Mike was
so depressed, he didn’t respond,
and you know, when a person is in
a severe depression – you can’t just
perk them out of it.”
When Mary went to visit Mike the next
morning, he surprised her by greeting
her with a big smile on his face!
“This was really something because
he was so severely depressed the
night before. And I said, ‘Mike, what
happened? You have a smile on
your face!’”
Check out our website every day! www.sign.org 7

And he said, “Mary, you’ll never guess
what happened last night!”
He relayed that his son Gerard
had come into his room that night,
saying, “Gerard was here all night long.
And Mary, he sat there over in that
chair with a brown robe on.”
Mary knew that Gerard had not been
there, but “I realized that somebody
brought peace into that room,
because my husband was smiling.”
Was it Padre Pio?
The change was dramatic, and the
fact that the Padre Pio relic helped
bring Mike out of his depression was
a gift of grace that helped buffer the
harsh reality to come two days later,
when doctors found they couldn’t
wait any longer to do the surgery and
had to amputate his leg from the
knee down.
God does not remove pain and
suffering from his faithful ones—but
He helps strengthen us for the fight.
The next challenge was trying to
teach him how to walk. He was sent
to a skilled care facility run by the
same group of Sisters that ran the
personal care home.
When Life is Done, the
Mosaic is Complete—
But is It?
God Grants a
Grieving Wife’s Request
Unfortunately, while Mike was recovering
from the leg amputation, he
suffered a fatal heart attack on March
23, 2004. Although reassured to know
that he didn’t suffer, Mary wouldn’t
rest until she learned he had received
Last Rites. But, even with this reassurance,
she still worried, and asked God
for a sign.
It came three months later through
an unlikely source—their daughter
Mary Ann’s husband, Peter, who had
lost his own father as a boy and had
become very close to Mike. Both men
loved to cook, and over the years they
bonded over their love of cooking.
And eating. “They were the best of
friends,” said Mary, “I mean, I’ve
never seen anything like it.”
“So, all the time my husband was sick,
going from one hospital to the next,
Peter was devastated. He just was lost;
his best friend was gone. And in March,
when Mike died, Peter was crushed.”
“And one morning three months
later, in June, 2004, I got this phone
call from Peter at about seven
o’clock. He was sobbing. This was not
like Peter—he’s an intellectual who’s
so together, and so strong. He was all
shook up about something. He said,
‘Mary, can I please come over? I’m
just a messenger. Can I please get this
off my chest?’ And so, he and Mary
Ann drove over. It was a beautiful
summer morning, we sat on the front
porch, and he told me this story of
what had just happened.”
The Vision and the Timeline
“When June came around, Peter was still going through a really hard time
after Mike’s death. He couldn’t sleep at night, so he would get up and go
downstairs and just sit there for a while, try to sleep, but couldn’t.”
“That night, he was sort of half asleep and half awake. And then he thought,
‘Oh, brother, the sun’s coming up, and I haven’t slept at all.’”
“But the sun wasn’t coming up. It was actually two o’clock in the morning.
Yet the room filled with brilliant light. Now, Peter is a real intellectual. He
needs proof. And this made no sense.”
“‘What the heck is going on?’ He got scared as he was sitting there, the
room filling with light. All of a sudden, he found he was watching—as he
described it—a timeline of someone’s life.”
But whose?
“He saw this person as a baby, a little baby, you know, just there in a little
blanket. And then the child became a toddler, and then a school-aged child.
In other words, he saw the life of this person as he was growing up, and
Peter said, ‘Mary, there was pain. I saw pain from the beginning.’ Just pain
in that child, you know, that the boy’s father went off to the war, that the
little boy later lost his father, stuff like that.”
At some point, Peter realized it was Mike’s timeline, but what he didn’t know
was that Mary had been praying to God for a sign. “Even though I believed
Mike was in heaven, that he had everything he was supposed to have to get
him there, but there was still that doubt – the worry. Going through the
grief process, I kept saying to God, ‘Give me a sign that Mike finally realized
that he was lovable, and that the childhood stuff was [healed]. I know he’s in
8 Spring/Summer 2021 • Signs and Wonders for Our Times

heaven, but with me, you know, I’m just a stupid woman. So please help
me—please give me a message.’”
“At the end of it, in the last ‘scene,’ was this—Mike was about 33 years old
(they always say you’re about 33 years old when you are in heaven. I’ve
heard that, but I don’t know if it’s true or not), and he was glowing, with
his beautiful, happy face. And he had on khakis, which was significant,
because my husband had to wear a suit to work every day, which he hated.
But he loved working in the yard with his khakis on.”
So, Mike looked at Peter with his glowing, happy face, and said two things:
“Tell Mary, I finally realized it wasn’t my fault.”
“And the second thing he said was, ‘Tell them to say the Rosary.’”
“And then he was gone.”
Peter, who was perplexed, asked Mary
if she knew what any of that means.
“Now, these things only meant
something to me—that the little boy
who was abused, but would never
accept that fact and had always
blamed himself—at last felt loved and
worthy of love—and that he understood
that what happened to him
when he was five years old was not his
fault. He couldn’t seem to get to that
point while he was living.”
The fact that Peter had been shown
details about things that happened to
Mike throughout his life—things Mike
had never shared with anyone but
Mary—many of them painful things—
was ultimately how Mary knew without
a doubt that this was a message from her
husband.
What a gift.
The Rosary Brings Healing
“When my daughter Terri, who
homeschools her 11 children, heard
about this, she said, ‘We’d better take
that seriously. We’re going to start
saying that Rosary.’”
“So, we gave it a shot, meeting at
different family members’ homes
every Friday to pray the Rosary—and
that was 17 years ago.”
Gathering to pray the Rosary is a bit
more involved than it used to be, with
so many people’s varying schedules.
The Rosary Group – family members of Mike & Mary
“And, you know, you have to put the
soup on, get the pizza, the ice cream,
the Coke—and somebody has to
make the cookies,” laughs Mary. “If
you want a 16-year-old big football
lugger of a kid to say the Rosary,
you’ve got to feed them!”
And if things begin to get off track
with people’s schedules interfering,
they credit Meg, Peter and Mary
Ann’s daughter, who has Down
syndrome, with being the spiritual
leader of the family. Says Mary, “She’s
always at the Rosary, and if we’re not
doing the Rosary, she’ll get mad and
say to her mother, ‘Why aren’t you
having the Rosary this week?’ She’s
been a real gift to our family.”
What had begun as a frantic lifeline
for Mary and Mike had turned into a
bonding legacy for the family.
“The Rosary has defined us in so
many ways—no matter what—that is
something that we have passed on to all
of our children,” says Joan, one of Mary
and Mike’s daughters. “I’m not saying
we’re all perfect, but there is solace
in knowing that we all truly believe in
the power of the Rosary, and I know
that no matter where any of our kids
are or what they do or don’t believe,
they have a devotion to our Lady
because of what my parents started
with all of us.”
The Dark Night of
the Soul – Another
Piece of the Mosaic is
Sharply Defined
“In his last days, as he went through
his Dark Night of the Soul, there
was great comfort that he could see
the chapel because the room he was
staying in was right across from it. It’s
things like this that happened and
brought comfort as we went through
this—looking back, I realized that
everywhere he’d go was Catholic;
there was a chapel, or there would
be a priest, you know? You don’t
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think about that until it’s all over, but
when you look back you realize, No
matter how bad things got, God was there.
Everywhere we went, there was God.”
Mike’s Funeral –
The Impossible Dream
“People to this day will say they never,
ever, were at a funeral like Mike’s,”
said Mary. Because of the family’s
close ties with the Catholic community
throughout their life, 20 priests
concelebrated his funeral.
“It was like heaven opened up and
the Holy Spirit flooded the place.”
Then, at Mike’s burial service in the
cemetery Chapel, out of the blue,
Monsignor Sheehan started singing
“The Impossible Dream,” referring
to Mike. (What Monsignor did
not realize was that this was Mike’s
favorite song.)
The Impossible Dream
from Man of La Mancha
To dream ... the impossible dream ...
To fight ... the unbeatable foe ...
To bear ... with unbearable sorrow ...
To run ... where the brave dare not go ...
To right ... the unrightable wrong ...
To love ... pure and chaste from afar ...
To try ... when your arms are too weary ...
To reach ... the unreachable star ...
This is my quest, to follow that star ...
No matter how hopeless, no matter
how far ...
To fight for the right, without question
or pause ...
To be willing to march into Hell, for a
Heavenly cause ...
And I know if I’ll only be true, to this
glorious quest,
That my heart will lie will lie peaceful
and calm,
when I’m laid to my rest ...
And the world will be better for this:
That one man, scorned and covered
with scars,
Still strove, with his last ounce of
courage,
To reach ... the unreachable star ...
Was Mike a
Victim Soul?
“Monsignor Sheehan knew
Mike was that man in the
song. If you were fighting a
battle together, Mike would
make you stay in safety, and he
would fight off the enemies.”
“You know, I remember asking
Monsignor if it could be, if
that is possible that maybe...
Mike was a victim soul? Is it
possible that at some point,
Mike offered to give up all
consolation, all healing, for
the sake of someone else,
like for his Uncle Jack, who
committed suicide? He
was that type of guy… He
definitely didn’t deserve what he got.”
“Monsignor agreed with me.”
Each Mosaic Overlaps
with Others’ Whose Lives
are Connected
What a gift they were given.
Through God’s great mercy and compassion,
so many unknowns were cleared up.
The family was able to receive this great
gift—the blessing of this vision—God
allowed Mike to come back, to bring his
family the gift of clarity, wisdom and
understanding, so they could understand
and have compassion for the things in
the past that, through no fault of his
own, had overshadowed him.
Peter was given the gift of consolation
on the loss of his beloved father-inlaw.
Mary prayed for closure, and was
given the gift of knowing that her
beloved Mike was with the Lord, and
that he was at peace at last, that he
finally felt loved and worthy of love—
and that he understood that what
happened to him when he was five
years old was not his fault.
They knew Mike was granted the
privilege to be able to see the highs
Mike and Mary
and lows of his life as God sees them.
God’s great mercy brought healing
and comfort to Mike’s loved ones,
so that his family—the fruits of Mike
and Mary’s great love and their
obedience to God throughout their
lives—would have a very clear understanding
and direction for the future:
Pray the Rosary.
Such is the Mercy Of God
Mary knows that God, in His Mercy,
uses all for His glory – and for our
benefit. He uses all the scattered
pieces of our lives—moments of joy
or pain from all our past accomplishments
and our past mistakes—even
the mistakes or actions caused
by others that harm us along the
way—transforming it all into the
Masterpiece of our life and overlapping
into the lives of our family
members.
We need to take a step back to see the
full picture more clearly—to see our
life with all its depth and highlights.
All we need is Faith.
Such is the Mercy of God.
10 Spring/Summer 2021 • Signs and Wonders for Our Times