Havik: Inside Brilliance

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Just Breathe 2020PoetrySameeha SooraPleasanton, California, USAHis Limbo SoliloquyPoetryCarl "Papa" PalmerUniversity Place, Washington, USAThe pain first started with anache.I watched as hope slowly died.Everyone’s sorrow was bringingthem down.I heard people say, “Just breathe.”How can I breathe when instead Ifall?This really made me think.But how could I even thinkThat somehow this acheWould still let me breathe?Soon came the most painful fall.George Floyd and Breonna Taylordied.Why must society bring us down?The loss of social contact keepsbringing us down.If we all stay smiling and thinkThat laughter and love hasn’tdied,This horrible, painful acheMight finally let us breathe.Then soon came Fall.It felt nice to know that MotherNature hasn’t died.The colorful leaves kept me fromfeeling down.But the raging fires made manypeople fall.Worrying and worrying wasn’thelping society thinkAbout how we can stop the firesand this ache.The smoke was caught in the air;how do we breathe?With barely any air left to breathe,2020 decided we must deal withanother fall.The elections were loud and keptmaking us ache.“Vote!” was what people said, tokeep us from being down.There were times when all I coulddo was thinkAbout all the laughter and lovethat had so obviously died.But after so many people died,Finally, there was some hope, thatallowed us to breathe.It was making a lot of peoplethink.The vaccines were bringing smiles,as so many people fall.Finally, we were looking up, notdown.Is it really gone? This horribleache?So many died, and people continueto fall.But as they say, “Breathe,” anddon’t look down.I think, as the year ends, we arenow beyond this ache.Actually, I like lockdown. I already was before COVID anyway,but now I’ve got my privacy. No family feeling forced to visitor hold vigil in my netherworld, he confides through the phone.Both of us former Army soldiers placing us on common groundmade introductions easier with the usual “where were we when”comparisons of duty assignments all military members embrace.Though sharing multiple telephone calls these past seven monthssince my assignment to be his companion as a hospice volunteer,I have yet to meet him face-to-face due to pandemic restrictions.Using his bedside number at the nursing home, I can call anytime,not worry about visiting hours, ask if he’s busy, got time to talk.His answer’s most always the same, Just busy here being alone,too close to death to complain. Clicking me to speaker he beginswhat he calls “me-memories from a time when when was when.”Mostly musing of being anywhere but there, lost in an actual place,blurring “what was with what is” behind and in front of his shadow,recalling dreams as a younger man, of a future in past perfect tense.And times talking of present times from his no man’s land outpost,All days end as they begin in purgatory, today recopying yesterday,cared for by hosts of faceless masked angels not letting me die alone.Forgive me only thinking of myself, I just need you to hear I’m here.Inside I’m your age, the two of us sharing a brew at the NCO club,years ago and oceans away, comrades-in-arms talking of our day.To me he’s the sergeant with permanent change of station ordersin transition for his final mission ending his time on active servicein hopes his God is religious and his terminal assignment is good.26
COVID 19 Dreaming: Prince Edward IslandPhotographyKathleen URBANAlamo, California, USA27
Page 1: InsideBriliance
Page 4 and 5: StaffEditor-in-ChiefLara AbreuSenio
Page 6 and 7: AcknowledgmentsOur deepest thanks t
Page 8 and 9: Index of ContributorsFirst Place Fi
Page 10 and 11: Tesa FloresBruises132Taew FornolesN
Page 12 and 13: Thea SchillerFinding the T in the C
Page 14 and 15: Creative Works
Page 16 and 17: For morality, ethics,Sacred justice
Page 18 and 19: His name was Mo.He liked school, we
Page 20 and 21: would never allow a Communist natio
Page 22 and 23: at all. I want to be a union member
Page 24 and 25: 10Little City MarketPaintingPat Wai
Page 26 and 27: In Our HouseFictionSusan HettingerO
Page 28 and 29: talking while we decorated these pa
Page 30 and 31: to me, knuckles on hip.“Fine,”
Page 32 and 33: 18HannahPaintingYim Ivy WuDanville,
Page 34 and 35: A Tale of Three AvocadosFictionKilm
Page 36 and 37: When he got home, he helped his mot
Page 38 and 39: AlonePhotographyDylan ScilliaMarlbo
Page 42 and 43: Dogwood BlossomsFabricKathleen URBA
Page 44 and 45: ical decolonization. I don’t. I u
Page 46 and 47: we’re having. I sort of let it ha
Page 48 and 49: The Unpaid Philosopher or theTypewr
Page 50 and 51: his withered power. “I guess the
Page 52 and 53: quick escape.She came out beside a
Page 54 and 55: desperate lie was breaking away and
Page 56 and 57: ApiologyPoetryJames Ph. KotsybarVan
Page 58 and 59: Keep DreamingPhotographyOlga Sushch
Page 60 and 61: 46Digital Collage ArtDigital ArtIla
Page 62 and 63: Agony of a poetPoetrySandip SahaKol
Page 64 and 65: 50Agent PeacockCollageJennifer Fred
Page 66 and 67: ferent to the burdocks which stuck
Page 68 and 69: Adam. We will not be led by the bea
Page 70 and 71: Do you like butter? Do you like che
Page 72 and 73: The Old ManPoetry - TetrameterCraig
Page 74 and 75: finally sold the tables to her just
Page 76 and 77: The Good and the TalentedPoetryMari
Page 78 and 79: Everyone knew that the man in the v
Page 80 and 81: end of the parking lot when we real
Page 82 and 83: I. Enter the Theme ParkWith a highw
Page 84 and 85: This is How Delirium's Demiurge Dro
Page 86 and 87: 72Zen Sex MetallicaPaintingLabdhi S
Page 88 and 89: ed screaming curses and threats at
Page 90 and 91:
76Rise From PandemicAcrylic and Spr
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and head home, but she can tell alr
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***Danielle wakes to a heavy callou
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Fossil Fuel RelicPaintingCarolyn Lo
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I am not a person.I am a disappoint
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GreenPoetryJilli PennerCitrus Heigh
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3AMPoetryMicaela WalleyHanover, Mar
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Lady XDigital ArtEdward Supranowicz
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left undiscussed. But she couldn't
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the opposite end, we need not talk
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You told me you loved meon a spring
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Moonflowers on Arthur StreetFiction
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it, he grew aggressive towards her.
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ConnectionScreenprintAriel CooperJa
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with every breath I took.“Yeah...
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Won't You RunAway?PoetryEllaheh Goh
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Where the Sea Swallows the SkyFicti
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think it was anything else. Why the
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She can taste sorrow in her morning
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IF WE ARE NOTALLOWED TOPREFORM GRIE
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Reading has always been Ssalongo’
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robust voice that she never had to
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When the yellowest of all sunrises
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The room is hot and dusty. No one h
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the table.Emma was looking at him w
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Fearfully and Wonderfully MadeLitho
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128MaverickPaintingAydin ErmolaevPl
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indulging dissipated desires. Which
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BruisesPoetryTesa FloresBrooklyn, N
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Corridor. 1. I silently open a narr
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Someplace Without WashroomsFictionA
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digits, followed by a ringtone.“L
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The six other benches, each with th
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TemptationsTo DrownTo take the plun
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Instead of pacing circles around th
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e-mail when I got home from the lib
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to read The Old Man and the Sea onc
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Santorini SunrisePhotographyLara Ab
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“I wonder how he knew?” Jon ask
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“Are you feeling all right?” Hi
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If You Scared, Go To Church!!Poetry
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Fatal fatePoetrySandip SahaKolkata,
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India which is a relief in some way
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162let it goDigital ArtVita Nocilla
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Far past twilight, souls merge with
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“You’re welcome to sit here . .
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city had stretched to embrace them
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in a hurry,I push past a manby toma
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WavesPhotographyLouis StaebleBowlin
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He Tramples theDaisiesPoetryKerri-a
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176the butterflies in mystomach are
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sidewalks.Lacey sails by on her bik
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first until my stomach feels like i
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loose rock and dirt sliding around
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Uncle Down UnderPoetryJilli PennerC
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“It was when I met Danny. I was s
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188Contained Chaos:Growing in a Lab
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The Girl from the BookstoreFictionK
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It was nearly five. The avenue was
Page 208 and 209:
RhiannonPoetryCaleb GonsalvesRosevi
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196Before the BalletPaintingPat Wai
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The other half cringe.Others arrive
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200From Rubble to RelicCorrosive Me
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Curtain CallPoetryNezrin HasanlyCon
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messy and poorly behaved. But Ember
Page 220 and 221:
Blue FlavorPaintingOlga SushchikPle
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“Can you see yourself with a guy
Page 224 and 225:
didn’t hurt matters that he was a
Page 226 and 227:
heard a lot about her and what she
Page 228 and 229:
214Galapagos LovePhotographyLara Ab
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A Summer withYou, AgainPoetryJames
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passed down, either by word, or, id
Page 234 and 235:
Paper BirdPaintingOlga SushchikPlea
Page 236 and 237:
Sam Epps nodded to the next person
Page 238 and 239:
As Sam let the man into the domicil
Page 240 and 241:
Moral and Natural PhilosophyPoetryR
Page 242 and 243:
The child believes it looked better
Page 244 and 245:
A Happy Green Chlamydia PlushCreati
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Somehow, they both knew they woulde
Page 248 and 249:
Gerald and Doris. Died 11th August
Page 250 and 251:
Soon we are on our way for the one-
Page 252 and 253:
gestures when she realized that we
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may yet come to the people of that
Page 256 and 257:
constant warmth, and if a strong ra
Page 258 and 259:
244NeverlandPhotographyCaleb Gonsal
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HydroponicsPoetryJean-Sebastien Gre
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PeacePaintingYim Ivy WuDanville, Ca
Page 264 and 265:
The PoolPoetryTaunja ThomsonCold Sp
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Act 1Scene 1Setting: On October 6,
Page 268 and 269:
WARDNo I won’t.MARCNot until you
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MARCYou don’t seem—WARDWalt dep
Page 272 and 273:
MARCWard, show him.WARD tilts his h
Page 274 and 275:
THOMASSee! You don’t listen! I ne
Page 276 and 277:
KINGOh, and what do you mean I’m
Page 278 and 279:
Academic Works
Page 280 and 281:
ates the notion that his household
Page 282 and 283:
Community College StigmaAcademic No
Page 284 and 285:
significant solution to solving the
Page 286 and 287:
work life is not left at the door.
Page 288:
The Truth Behind The American Dream
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Havik: Inside Brilliance

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