Special Edition: October 2022
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Contents
Staff
The journey to
adulthood
The Lasso staff’s
favorite birthdays
Making friends as an
adult
4-5
6-7
8
Adviser | Joseph Alderman
Editor-in-Chief | Laura Pearson
Managing Editor | Maddie Ray
Engagement Editor | Brielle Gines
Top 10 things to do in
your 20s
Who do you want to
be?
2
9
10
Graphic Designer | Stephanie Vo
Staff Writers | Eclipse Stark
Karyme Flores
Clarise Tujardon
Presents
Brandi
Chastain
Two-time Olympic gold-medalist,
coach & sports broadcaster
Paup Lecture Series
Oct. 11, 7-8 p.m.
Student Union at Hubbard Hall
and livestreaming online
Register: twu.edu/pauplecture/2022-paup-lecture
The Journey to Adulthood
by Clarise Tujardon
As a little girl, I always dreamed of what it would
be like to be a woman, especially when I reached
my 20s. I envisioned it as having the perfect
boyfriend, having the perfect friends, and having
the confidence that I always wanted.
But I was wrong.
Graphic by Stephanie Vo
Being in my 20s is not all that I imagined it to
be. The reality is, it is full of heartbreak. Not just
romantically, but friendship-wise as well. Your
confidence is challenged all the time.
I have only been in my 20s for about five months, and I have faced many challenges that broke me and
built me back up. A part of me wanted to just curl up into a ball and cry forever, but I knew I needed
to keep moving forward. I knew that a few years down the road, I will be laughing at all of these
challenges, and all of these memories will just feel like a distant memory.
Romantic heartbreak hit me harder in my 20s. I always thought that heartbreak would not hurt as much,
but it hits harder because this is where I hoped to figure everything out. And at the same time, this is the
stage where I figure out what I want and do not want with a man.
Throughout my life, the greatest romantic love I ever had was like the love Stefan and Caroline had
in “Vampire Diaries.” From that relationship, I feel like I grew as a person, and knew who I wanted to
be, both in and out of a relationship. And most of all, I knew the type of love I wanted to have, one that
made me feel safe and loved.
While friendship hit harder than romantic relationships in my 20s, the hardest lesson I have learned
during this time is that friendships come and go, just like boyfriends, and that is a heartbreak that is
equally, or sometimes worse than romantic heartbreaks.
These past few weeks, I have reevaluated my friendships. I have realized that I need to do that in order
to evolve as a person. As much as I wanted to believe that the friends I make will be my friends forever,
in my 20s I have come to realize that that is not the case.
Were those friendships good for my mental health? Did those friends have my best interest at heart?
Primarily, did those friends help me grow as a person? One that helps me grow from a caterpillar to a
butterfly.
4
These are questions that I need to think thoroughly about, especially in my 20s. Friendships during this
time of my life are greatly tested. I need to keep the friends that are mature and can create a positive
impact upon my life.
I had to cut out many friends from my life because of the negativity they brought me. Those decisions
were soul crushing and broke me with each friend that I cut out of my life. A part of me felt like I was
being selfish and that I was being a terrible person for cutting those people out of my life.
I felt like I did not cherish the good times we had. All the laughs that we shared and the friendships we
had built with one another as we grew up. A part of me felt like I did not recognize the person I was
becoming.
While another part yelled at me to stay in those friendships, I endured all the pain I was feeling so I can
save everyone else. It was so bad to the point that I felt like I was always saving others, and I wished
someone else was there to save me. At the end of the day, I knew I had to do that for my well-being.
Yet, the most important lesson that I have come to learn in my 20s is that it is alright to choose myself.
There is nothing wrong with that. I have to do what is best for myself first before helping others out.
Choosing myself was the best decision I have ever made in my 20s because it gave me a great deal
of strength, one that I never thought that I would ever have. As a girl, I always wanted to be there for
everyone and make sure they were happy, even if it meant sacrificing my own happiness for their sake.
And as I grew up, I knew that was not a healthy thing to do.
This new strength made me feel like I was unbreakable, and that whatever challenges life throws at me,
I will be able to face it with my head up high. The way a strong woman would be.
My newfound strength helped me fall in love with the strong, independent woman that I am slowly
becoming. That is the love that I want to build at this time in my life. This strength is giving me the
confidence that I have always wanted to have, the one where I am loving the woman I am slowly
becoming, minute by minute.
Being in my 20s has been a wild ride, to say the least. But it is also a time of growth, maturity, and soul
searching, a place in your life where you will be able to find yourself. It is a place of transition from
being a child, and turning into the person you want to become.
And to every person reading this, the overall message I want to send to you is to enjoy your 20s, enjoy
the person you are slowly becoming, because there will never be another time like this in your life. You
are amazing, just the way you are.
5
THE LASSO STAFF’S
favorite birthdays
“My favorite birthday was when I turned 16-years-old. I had a big party with
all of my friends, and my mom made a dessert table with a cake from scratch. I
played games all night with my friends, and I will always remember that party.”
Laura Pearson, Editor-in-Chief
“My favorite birthday was my 18th birthday. I completed my senior year of high
school online because of the COVID-19 pandemic so I was struggling with not
getting to see my friends. My mom knows that cows are my all-time favorite
animal and planned a big cow-themed birthday party for me.”
Maddie Ray, Managing Editor
“My favorite birthday would have to be my 20th. It was earlier this year and
it was very special to me because I was crossing over into adulthood in a
new way during a tumultuous time in my life, and it marked a symbol for me
in blossoming into a bee which I got tattooed on me around the time of my
birthday. I reigned in the new decade with an ice cream date with some of my
closest friends and it was very near and dear to my heart.”
Brielle Gines, Engagement Editor
“My favorite birthday was my 19th birthday. I was on campus for RA training
that day so I didn’t get to officially celebrate it, but the friends I made that day
have become some of the people I am closest to now and I am very grateful to
have been able to get to know them.”
Stephanie Vo, Graphic Designer
6
‘‘If I had to choose my favorite, I would choose my 20th birthday because on
that birthday, I am no longer a teenager or a girl. Although the one thing that
I always liked about my birthday is that it feels like I’m celebrating it on two
different days because I was born in the Philippines. To me, that makes me
feel like Queen Elizabeth II, since she celebrated her birthday on two different
days.’’
Clarise Tujardon, Reporter
“My favorite birthday would probably have to be my 12th birthday. My mom
and I decked out the entire house in black and pink decorations, we had a
Death Note cake with all the detectives from the anime, and all of my favorite
foods were set up. My 12th birthday was the first time my mom allowed my
friends to sleep over at our house. We did everything a sixth grader could
possibly enjoy from prank calls, to karaoke, to scary stories. While most of
those friendships dwindled as I got older, those memories will always be some
of my favorites and I will always cherish them.”
Karyme Flores, Reporter
“My favorite birthday would have to be my 18th birthday. For the two years
prior I had wanted to visit the NASA station in Houston, but was never able
to. In 2021 we finally got the chance. At the time the station had exhibits over
the Apollo missions, the shuttle tour of different recovered ships, Mars future
deep space exploration, and the Johnson station tour, showing the comms room
used during the Apollo mission tours. For me, as someone who aspires to be an
astrophysicist, this was a dream.”
Eclipse Stark, Reporter
7
Making Friends as an Adult by Karyme Flores
According to a study by the Harvard Graduate
school, 36% of American adults feel serious
loneliness. The majority of that percentage is
young people aged 18-25 years old. Friendships
are an integral part of being a human, but as
people ascend into adulthood, making and
maintaining friendships becomes less sustainable.
Making friendships break down into pleasure
friendships, where you find something you both
relate to, utility friends, where friendships are
based around work, and complete friendships,
where friendships are based on one’s virtues and
character. When people get older, finding pleasure
friendships lessen as we prioritize professionalism
and careers. Adulthood also minimizes the
chances for unplanned interaction and mutual
vulnerability. Without intentionally looking for
other adults, the environment to form friendships
is less accessible in adulthood.
“In general, as an adult you have more demands
on your time, when you’re working, you’re in
school, you’re driving here and there,” professor
of Love and Loneliness Dr. Brian Harding said.
“We rarely have the time required to engage in the
deepest form of friends as Aristotle would define
it, so we’re left at best with utility friends, you
know people that we work with or people that we
are just nearby to but don’t necessarily have a lot
in common with or a deep connection.”
Harding explains that many adults are not
exposed to the circumstances to build friendships
because adults are often trapped in a triangle
cycle. The triangle cycle is the monotony of work,
home and running errands. The lack of variety
in this system causes adults to meet less people,
decreasing the amount of pleasure and complete
friendships.
Graphic by Stephanie Vo
Adult friendships are also affected by the fact that
as people grow older, they want to put time and
effort into their more significant relationships. The
American Psychological Association spoke to Dr.
Marisa Franco, and she defines this as socioemotional
selectivity hypothesis. Adults begin to start valuing
quality over quantity, because they see life more
limited on time.
“Adult demands on time prevents them from having
the time to form deep friendships,” Harding said.
“If what you are doing is going to work, going home,
running errands and you’re stuck in that triangle it is
very hard to develop friendships.”
Overall, Harding encourages adults to build their
virtue and goodness, and use that goodness on others
to take themselves out of the triangle cycle.
“I would say the first step is to develop virtue so you
attract good people around you and then treat those
people well,” Harding said. “That should go a long
way toward building friendships, provided of course
that you put yourself in situations where you can meet
people.”
8
Top 10 Things to Do in Your 20s
By Clarise Tujardon
1. Fall in love with yourself
The relationships that we have with ourselves are the
most important, and our 20s are a time when we get to
know ourselves better. This is the time when we find
ourselves, the person we want to become and fall in love
with the person we are becoming.
There will be small moments in your life that later
become life-changing and will help you embrace the
qualities that you did not know you had, and in turn will
make you confident. As this happens to you, you will
start to love yourself more, because, without that selflove,
you will not be able to truly love someone else.
2. Reevaluate your friendships
Friendships change just like you. It is a time when
your friendships will be challenged, especially with the
friends that you have had since your childhood. This is
a time of personal growth and a phase of transition for
everyone.
3. Save Money
Opening up a savings account and putting in even a
small portion of your paycheck every month will be
beneficial down the road. You never know when you
might need to use it. If the COVID-19 pandemic taught
us anything, it is that you never know what can happen.
It is up to you to be prepared when situations like these
occur, and it is extremely important to keep a set of
emergency funds aside.
4. Give yourself a new wardrobe
As you age, your style will evolve and you may need a
new wardrobe to accommodate that change. When you
are out at your favorite store, go pick out a few pieces
that are within your budget.
5. Accept that you are going to make mistakes
When envisioning our 20s, we usually think that we will
have it all together and never make mistakes.
At any time in your life, you will make mistakes, just
like you did when you were younger, and that is okay.
You will still make mistakes because you are learning.
Graphic by Stephanie Vo
6. Do not be too hard on yourself
In your 20s, you will feel pressure to keep it
together all the time. You want to show that
you are perfect.
You are going to have negative emotions.You
have the right to feel that way. You are entitled
to your own emotions.
7. Treat yourself
Treating yourself can mean taking a 30-minute
break from studying, taking a walk around
the park, or buying your favorite type of food.
Treat yourself for all the hard work you do.
8. Choose yourself
The most important person in any situation is
you. There is nothing wrong with choosing
yourself, it does not make you selfish. It just
means you love yourself enough to find your
inner peace.
9. Use your voice
Using your voice in your 20s is important,
it will help you grow as a person because
our most brutal critics tend to be ourselves.
By using your voice, you are choosing your
path in life, and that will help you make your
decisions in life.
10. Take a risk
You will never be in your 20s again. This is the
time to take a risk, live your life the way you
want to live it and enjoy every minute of it.
You never want to look back and think “what
if?”
9
Who Do You
Want to Be?
By Brielle Gines
The 20s can be a very pivotal time for a young
adult’s life as it represents this interesting limbo
of becoming an adult, but also not quite being in
your desired career field as of yet.
One thing that can also be intimidating while
being in this decade is deciding whether or not
you are wanting to continue with a passion your
younger self once had or venturing out and trying
something new.
Image of Loren Freeman
Image of Leilani Blackstad
Ultimately, the choice is yours. You can
unequivocally do anything that you would like
and have been impressed upon your heart to do
as you navigate this new decade for yourself.
“I want to be a helper,” TWU student Loren
Freeman said. “I want to have a positive impact
on the world whenever I look back on my life.
I’ve always enjoyed helping others.”
Freeman also shared her life plans and what she
plans to do after graduating.
“My life plan is to graduate with my bachelor’s
from Texas Woman’s University,” Freeman said.
“And then I want to go on and pursue a master’s
degree. I’m not quite sure in what yet, still
figuring that out.”
Freeman shared the importance of wanting
to help people after graduating from graduate
school.
“When I work with people in some shape or
form, I really want to make a positive impact and
help others after college,” Freeman said. “I’d
love to have a family of my own. I don’t want to
get married but I’d love to have kids.”
10
Leilani Blackstad, an 18-year-old Business
Administration major, shared her insights on
who she would like to be and her life plan after
college.
“I want to be a body piercer in the future,”
Blackstad said. “It’s just something that I
really enjoy and it helped me through a lot
with depression. It was something that I really
enjoyed and enjoyed watching other people do.”
Blackstad shared that piercing is one of those
things that you are constantly learning and
found to be interesting.
“I want to open my own piercing shop one day
and hopefully have some tattoo artists along
with me,” Blackstad said. “I kind of want my
shop to double as a school. I want to be able to
teach younger people that it’s okay to express
yourself, because I didn’t really get to express
myself when I was a kid.”
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