village voice 70.pub - Dersingham Parish Council

Old Girls Patch
by Meetze
Guess what? I have googled the thumb growing thing I told you about. Apparently I have to
drink milk. Not so good for me as I am lactose intolerant. Everybody of us is actually except the 2legged
male and Tiny Tatty. Well, never mind. I lived without them for such a long time, that I
can’t even remember the summers and winters I already enjoyed.
The little 2-legged female that moved in last September moved out by the way. That is better for
us, as she kept forgetting to close the door and granddad kept escaping. And the shouting after him
did not help either because he chooses not to hear anybody. So off he went wobbling along. Good
thing my 2-legged female panics quickly and caught him before he could reach the road. Not a
good place to be for us as you will remember.
Sidney is a bit sad these days as Tinkerbelle brought along a new boy friend. She ditched him
for a bigger boy that looks like a rabbit-munchkin mix. So we call him Buxy. He is ever so cute,
but he only has eyes for Tink. Buxy tried to play with Sid, sort of to make up for his loss, but Sid
was not in the mood. Since Tink turned up with Buxy, Sid is cuddling at night a lot with our 2legged
female, which she loves, but I lost my space in her arm. I just can’t bring myself to fight
Sidney. I panic, scream and run off as soon Sid lifts a paw. I know I am silly; after all, I was here
first.
I started to sleep and purr on the pillow over my 2-legged male. But he did purr even louder
than me. Then I tried tickling him coincidently with the tip of my tail under his nose. He just gave
his nose a scratch and continued sleeping. I tried again, but he scratched again and just turned onto
his other side. That looked like a fun game to be, though I tickled him again. This time he
grumbled something I did not understand and pulled the duvet over his head. Now I had enough of
being ignored and jumped onto the big bump under the duvet. Now I got his full attention, as this
bump under the duvet was apparently very sensitive. He picked me up and put me on his side and
cuddled me. Don’t think I won; we are playing this “game” now for nearly 3 weeks. He just
doesn’t get that all I want is to sleep in his arm, as my female 2-legged ones arm is occupied by
Sid. Men!
But I have good sleeps in the end until my dreams get unceremoniously interrupted by a round
constantly ticking thing that lives on the bedside table. It makes a ridiculously loud noise until my
2-legged male whacks his paw on the top of that noisy little bugger. If I got whacked like that
once, what ever I did, I would never do it again. But this white thing does not seem to get the
message, as it keeps being loud every single day.
Speaking of ceremony. The wedding is coming up and Stumps got dressed for the occasion. I
took a picture, as you probably won’t believe it otherwise.
The weekend before the wedding we had Easter. My 2-legged
female did a fun game, which apparently everybody is playing
Easter Sunday in Germany. The eggs and little presents are
hidden somewhere in the garden and someone else has to find
them all. It was great fun to watch, as the 2-legged male
stumped a few times past some eggs and nearly tread on one as
well. The eggs were boiled and coloured the night before Easter
Sunday and that was fun as well. Stumps ended up with a pink
paw because she walked by mistake into the pink liquid bowl
and granddad ended up with a blue nose, because he thought the
blue liquid in the bowl could be food, so he had a close sniff.
ANSWERS from P 28
Titchwell, Bracon Ash, Overstrand, Salle, Binham, Carbrooke
74