Most Venerable Bhante Walpola Piyananda's 80th Birthday Celebrating - Collected Essays

I wanted to calm him, so I told him to go have breakfast. He
ignored me and hastily left the temple.
A couple of weeks later I was informed that Mahen had given
up his studies, moved out of the apartment he shared with Raj, and was
living in another Buddhist temple out in the San Fernando Valley. Our
paths occasionally crossed during the next few months, and I always
tried to speak to him. I’m unhappy to say that he ignored me.
During those months I heard from many sources that he was
spreading rumors about the monks in my temple. Unfortunately, he
did not stop at that; late one night Mahen called and threatened to burn
down the temple. The senior monk who answered the phone, Venerable
Dr. Ratanasara, immediately made a telephone call to the police.
Officers came to the temple immediately and took the matter
very seriously. They took my statement, and told me that if Mahen
ever again comes to the temple, to call them at once.
One month after this incident I was summoned to the City
Attorney’s office. Mahen had been called in, and was also present.
When Mahen was questioned about the threat, he made to burn down
the temple he replied, “Sir, these monks are obstructing my relationship
with Thanom, my fiancé. They are supporting my former roommate
Tuk, who lives at the temple.”
“What have you to say?” the attorney asked me.
“Sir, let me explain the real situation. Mahen and Thanom are
both members of my temple congregation. As a rule, we as monks
never interfere in the private lives of any person who attends our
temple. However, in this case, Thanom is not in the least romantically
interested in Mahen, contrary to what he just said. In fact, several
months ago she gave me a bundle of unopened letters from Mahen. I
know for a fact that she has a boyfriend, because I’ve met him at the
temple several times. She told me directly that Mahen had become a
nuisance. It seems to me that Mahen is living in a world of his own
imagination, which has affected not only his life, but the lives of many
others, including mine. Please advise Mahen to seek professional help;
I have nothing more to say.”
The City Attorney closed the case by saying these exact same
words to Mahen. He added, “You are prohibited to visit the temple.
You cannot make any threatening phone calls to them. If you break this
order you will end up in jail. The case is closed, and you may leave.”
As a result of this incident Tuk gave up his studies, and he
ended up moving to Texas. Thanom, desperately afraid of Mahen, left
the country permanently and returned to her native Thailand.
A few months later, I was surprised to see Raj and a couple
of his friends at the temple. “Bhante, I heard about the problems you
had because of Mahen and me. I feel guilty because there are certain
things that I said and did without thinking of the consequences they
could have. Forgive me, Bhante; my jokes have resulted in disaster for
two of my friends.”
“Raj, I feel sorry for Mahen and Tuk. Your playful nature
caused quite a bit of trouble for your friends, as well as for the monks.
You must understand that causing trouble for others and for yourself is
an unwholesome activity. The Buddha states, ‘If one harms oneself or
causes trouble to others, one accumulates bad karma.’
“In Western psychology, these words of the Buddha might
be describing sadistic and masochistic behavior. It seems that many
people are unaware that they might possess these traits. Some cultures
derive pleasure in watching bullfights, cockfights, wrestling, etc. The
spectators of these sorts of events may be unaware of their possible
sadistic inclinations. People who enjoy inflicting physical, mental or
emotional pain to themselves would be called masochistic. Certain
disorders actually cause people to cut themselves, burn themselves,
stop eating, and perform other harmful acts on their bodies. It is
important to eliminate the seeds of both sadism and masochism before
they sprout and take root. To do so, we have to be aware of our mental
pleasures and where they might lead us.
“Raj, think of all the damage caused by your frivolous
remarks, even though they might have been innocently spoken at
the time. Mahen and Tuk gave up their educations. Mahen is now
mentally disturbed and needs professional help that he cannot afford.
A faithful devotee had to leave her home here in this country. People
are criticizing the behavior of monks because of Mahen’s rumors, and
are innocently accumulating bad karma.
“Right now, try to re-organize your life in a mature manner, and
take care that you watch your speech. Be honest with yourself, look
clearly into your mind, and try to remove your unwholesome thoughts.
Also, don’t carry around your feelings of guilt, and from now on think
of positive ways you can help your friends. I will give you a quote from
the Dhammapada,
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