2023 Issue 6 Nov/Dec Focus - Mid-South Magazine

life
An Open
Mind &
Open Heart
Special to Focus Mid-South
Barbara Love has
fostered 75 children
in 26 years, including
LGBTQ+ children
Barbara Love. Photos courtesy of Meritan.
“I love to make a difference,” said Barbara Love.
“Caring for these children over the years has kept me
young and vibrant.
Love explained she first became interested in
fostering after learning a friend of hers had been
mistreated as a child. “No child should feel unwanted,”
Love said. After hearing her friend’s story, Love said, “I
knew I needed to help.”
When she started fostering children as a single parent
in 1997, she said she had no idea what she was doing.
“I just took whoever they needed me to,” adding she’s
fostered children ranging from six years old to 18. “Some
of the children were supposed to be here a week and
ended up being here for well over a year. The longest I’ve
had a child is two and one-half years,” Love said.
In addition to fostering children of all ages, Love has also
fostered several LGBTQ+ children over the years.
“When you bring a child into your home,” Love said,
“you have to have an open mind and let them express who
they are.” She said of her LGBTQ+ children: “You just love
them like everyone else and let them open up to you. You
let them know you’re here just to love them. Not to judge
them or hurt them… just to love them. All they want is to be
loved and accepted.”
She said one LGBTQ+ young man she fostered is now a
fashion designer. “He told me when he came to me that no
one would accept him,” Love said. “I allowed him to be his
full self, loved him for who he was, told him to follow his
dreams and now he’s a fashion designer.”
With all the children, Love said, “you just have to have
an open mind and open heart. I show them they are not
just the product of their environment. I show them how
to live, give them life skills and let them know they are
worthy and important.”
She said she can’t let herself dwell on the sadness and
hurt many of the children have suffered. “I can’t dwell on
the sadness,” she said, “because these kids are scared
and just need to be loved. All a child wants is love from
somebody. There’s no need to dwell on their pasts, no
need to do anything but love them. They’ve already been
through enough.”
Love explained she’s been fortunate to have had
minimal problems with her foster children over the years,
even though she’s fostered some children who have had
behavioral and other challenges. “It’s all about giving them
love. When you do, they’ll listen to you… you redirect but
still love. And always have candy.”
A mother of two adult children, Love also adopted two
of her foster daughters along the way. One daughter came
to her when she was ten, Love adopted her when she was
15 and she is now 22. The second daughter, Markiva, came
to Love when she was six and will soon turn 11.
“When Markiva came to me she was very shy and
withdrawn,” Love said. “Today, she is on the dance team,
making great grades… It’s been amazing to watch her grow
and change. She calls me ‘Gigi’ and says she knows I’m her
family now and always will be.”
36 Music | Nov+Dec 2023 | focuslgbt.com