GEt youR caFFEinE Fix in thE city - Metropolis

Agenda Movies By Don Morton
Metpod
Midnight in PAris
Nostalgia, they say, just isn’t what it
used to be. But that corny gag about
our most wistful of emotions, its
allure and its dangers, is what’s at the
heart of Woody Allen’s witty and wise 41st film. A
successful but dissatisfied Hollywood screenwriter
(a spot-on owen Wilson) on a pre-honeymoon
visit to Paris sees the city as a second shot at his
youthful dream of becoming a novelist. His fiancée
(rachel McAdams) likes to shop. He longs for the
days between the wars, when Paris was a hotbed of
not-yet-famous creative geniuses. one night, while
new
Vidal sassoon
tHe MoVie
this cheerful hagiography on the
20th century’s most influential
hairstylist offers glimpses into his
compelling life, from a Dickensian
childhood in a Jewish orphanage,
through wartime London,
a sojourn in Israel, then swinging London, to finally being in
the right place at the right time with the right entrepreneurial
attitude and, most importantly, the right, Bauhaus-inspired,
geometrical haircuts. I learned stuff, but the upbeat, infomercial
approach, superficial even for a fashion flick, made me wish for
something deeper about this undeniably inspirational man.
Sassoon died on May 9 at 84. (94 min)
Showing from may 26
new
Men in Black 3
It’s always a pleasant surprise
when a movie turns out to be
better than you expected. And
frankly, after the flaccid MIB
II back in 2002, I didn’t expect
much of t h is second sequel .
But it ’s wonderful! trouble is,
everything’s a surprise, and I can’t tell you much. not even
what the hell Josh Brolin’s doing in there. you’ll have to get
your spoilers elsewhere. Steven Spielberg exec-produced it,
Ethan Coen co-wrote it, and Barry Sonnenfeld directed it. It’s
got a good story; some fresh and funny creatures; a cool, Back
to the Future kind of vibe; and it’s even quite moving at the end.
Must-see. (105 min)
Also showing
faces in tHe cRowd
Profoundly ridiculous horror-suspense drama
about a woman suffering from a neural ailment
rendering her unable to recognize faces. (100
min)
26 • download our podcast at • podcast.metropolis.co.jp
sitting alone in a deserted square, a vintage Peugeot
sputters up and Scott and Zelda Fitzgerald invite him
to a party. Each midnight thereafter, he finds himself
rubbing shoulders with the likes of Hemmingway,
Picasso, Dalí, Buñuel, Eliot, and Gertrude Stein a
special nod to Kathy Bates. Allen wisely doesn’t
bother explaining how this happens, or even if the
guy’s just imagining it, because it really doesn’t
matter. those with a modicum of cultural literacy
will enjoy this film the most. So is nostalgia what it
used to be? no. It’s better. And funnier. (94 min)
Showing from may 26
daRk sHadows
the Gothic tV cult fave of the early
’70s was pretty out there for its
day. now tim Burton and Johnny
Depp turn it up to 11. Barnabas
Collins was, in 1772, the scion of a
successful Maine fisheries family
in colonial America who spurned
the love of a witch. She retaliated by turning him into a vampire
and burying him in a coffin. two hundred years later he emerges
to a world of lava lamps and the Carpenters, and vows to return
his humorously dysfunctional family to its former glory. It’s as
delightfully twisted as any Burton film, and though it sags in a
few places, Depp makes the material shine. (113 min)
BRake
Secret Service guy wakes up in
a transparent box in the trunk of
a car, put there by terrorists who
want to know where the President
is. they first try psyching him out,
then torture, but this is one tough
agent. As claustrophobic guy-in-abox
movies go, this one, starring Stephen Dorff and his nostrils,
is a bit like 2010’s Buried, starring ryan reynolds and his, except
for the part about being remotely believable. Dorff is solid, but
the film’s credibility erodes with each new contrivance, until not
one but two preposterous third-act plot U-turns leave you with a
definite jerked-around feeling. (92 min)
last nigHt
Examination of marital fidelity ping-pongs
between two couples and generates some
sexual tension, but few true insights. (93 min)
BRidesMaids
The Hangover meets the chick flick in a comedy
offering heart, mischief and great hilarity. (128
min)
For theater details: metropolis.co.jp/movies
House of tHe Rising sun
An ex-con working as a strip-club
bouncer in Grand rapids (Grand
rapids?) finds himself between
a rock (the mob) and a hard place
(the cops) when the place is robbed
and he is blamed, and he must clear
his name, etc. Pro: Dave Bautista,
another freight train of a pro wrestler turning to the movies,
delivers his lines competently and has a certain presence. And
the filmmakers are, refreshingly, going for a noir vibe rather than
slam-bang action. Con: those filmmakers don’t have the chops to
do noir, the story is shopworn, and it gets boring fast. Just kind of
peters out at the end. Japanese title: Rising Sun Uragirino Daisho.
(90 min)
Bad teacHeR
Cameron Diaz plays a lazy, golddigging,
drug-abusing skank who
works as a teacher despite having
not a trace of talent or interest in the
education field. She’s trying to get
her hands on an extra $10,000 for
the boob job she thinks will attract
a wonky-but-rich fellow educator (Justin timberlake). Laughing
yet? It’s puzzling how a “comedy” starring Diaz, who can do funny,
manages to be so mean-spirited, obvious and flaccid. It’s like it’s
going through the raunch-flick motions and hoping someone
will laugh. Someone will, but not many. Don’t be expecting Young
Adult. or even Bad Santa. (92 min)
tHe Muppets
A longtime fan is dismayed to find
his felt-and-fuzz idols disbanded
and the historic Muppet Studios
abandoned and threatened by
a developer. He vows to get the
band back together and “put on a
show” to raise money to restore the
gleefully insane troupe to its former glory. this, in time-honored
tradition, involves a lot of clever singing (incl. “the rainbow
Connection”) and dancing, the telling of self-aware jokes and
several high-profile cameos. though this fun flick might appeal
more to nostalgic adults than to kids, it will put a smile on everyone’s
face, and what’s better than that? Mah na mah na! (98 min)
opeRation: endgaMe
W he n t he le a d e r o f t wo r iva l
te a m s o f s e r i o u s ly u n h i n g e d
covert assassins is murdered in
their deep-underground bunker
and a self-destruct mechanism
activated, the teams, instead of
working together on an exit strategy,
elect to start killing each other using office supplies. While
this unforgivably violent, mean-spirited misfire is aiming for
Dr. Strangelove satire, all it achieves is the most unpleasant 82
minutes of blunt trauma you will ever witness in a movie theater
and a colossal waste of the talents of rob Corddry, Ellen Barkin,
Maggie Q, Adam Scott, Ving rhames, Jeffrey tambor and Zach
Galifianakis. Japanese title: Gokuhi Shirei Dog x Dog. (82 min)
find Me guilty
When mobster Jackie Dinorscio,
a lready ser v i n g 30 years , was
named a co-defendant in a massive
’80s rICo trial, he decided, to the
hor ror of t he prosecut ion a nd
defense alike, to act as his own
lawyer, thus providing his poorly
suppressed inner standup comic with a captive audience and the
opportunity to point out the absurdities of the US justice system.
Sidney Lumet (12 Angry Men, Serpico, Network, The Verdict) brings
his formidable courtroom experience to the enterprise, but
what makes this one stand out is his casting of Vin Diesel in the
lead. With hair! And hey! Vinny D does pretty good. Who knew?
Japanese title: Connection Mafiatachi no Hotei. (125 min)
Joyful noise
I could have ignored the many contrivances
in this marriage in hell of Sister Act and Glee if
it had delivered even a little real gospel music.
(117 min)