Anuario Curso 2010-2011 - Doña Blanca de Navarra

1 MAY 2009: Your love hurts me. You just think of
yourself. You can’t be with me because I have no
strength. Each discussion and confrontation contradicts
the word love. I’m sick and tired. Only you, only
your evil ways ... and what do I do with all this? Digest
every night alone with my sorrow and broken dreams.
I tried to smile, like most people who have trouble accepting
unwanted solitude.
And you act as if nothing had happened. You say you
love me, miss me, need me, you want to be with me. It’s
over. Even if hurts.
2 JULY 2009: I don’t understand what I said or did, or
why you went into the kitchen with the knife in your
hands, asking me to kill you. I tried to stay calm for
the kids, but you shouted and shouted while not stopping
asking me to kill the monster that lives inside
you.
7 JULY 2009: The night promised to be ideal, with
children playing and laughing. I felt nothing but panic,
but tried not to show fear, because what you always
accuse me of is the fear that wakes up your monsters.
The children began to get tired and I tried to convince
you that they’d better get to bed. “No, do not spoil everything,”
you said. The journey ended with shouting, crying,
violent games.... One thing is that you are treating me badly but
you must leave my children alone.
4 AUGUST 2009: It’s over. I’ve decided you’re not longer sleeping
at home. Children can’t witness this, but how can I tell you?
20 AUGUST 2009: When I told you, we engaged in a conversation
without meaning: “I’m exhausted,” “do not be evil”, “I can‘t
drive”... I didn’t realize that the only thing you wanted was to
extend the stay and you stayed. Eventually I accepted but you
had to go before the children woke up.
What a mistake! The alarm sounded and you did not want to
move. I insisted and insisted, and like a crazy man you started
shouting, waking up the kids, and we all ran from side to side. I
heard those little voices ... “Do not hit mommy.”
7 APRIL 2010: Today, doctors have told me they’re going to operate
on me because of one of the injuries that you have caused
me. I can’t live with this stress and this panic.
4 MAY 2010: You’ve found me. I have fear, but you’ve reassured
me your love. We walked and talked. When it seemed that everything
was quiet, you started shouting at me that I always
spoil everything, if I want to tease you, you are very harmful
... You began pushing me, beating, and when I sat, crying, once
again I was not able to identify what I had said or what I had
done to live that horror. You took an impressive size stone and
Alumnado premiado en el Concurso Literario de
inglés con profesorado del Departamento
threw it over my head. I stood there for a long time. While you
relieve, I start crying, until you saw my immobility, then you
started crying and asking for forgiveness.
18 JUNE 2010: You’ve finally accepted that you need professional
help and I want to be with you. Today we went to that
meeting. I made another mistake, It was the wrong street. “You
are clumsy ‘,’why do you not shut up ‘,’ and I’ve missed” ... we entered
a car park, as it was crowded, I thought you wouldn’t do
anything to me. -But you were hitting me, shouting at me, and
I… crying. More hitting, more shouting, more weeping... In a
known garage, but nobody helped me. Why? I went out, hitting,
screaming and crying again, but nobody helped me.
2 AUGUST 2010: Today, I stopped suffering for love. I admit I
was wrong and thanks to my children, my friends, my family
and psychologists, I discovered that I’m alive. I wish and desire
that our ways find inner peace. This search of myself has
become a priority, I will not go on deluding. This relationship is
finished. It’s become an addiction very painful for both of us. I
have reached my limit. I can no longer carry the weight of making
you suffer and causing you pain. I’m sorry in soul.
BURLADABURLATA 21