MIndy’s CallIng

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pregnancy
Baby Steps
Are yOu reALLy reAdy? AnsWer these 4 questiOns
beFOre yOu stArt trying tO cOnceive
By Colleen Oakley
The average age
American women
have their first
baby is 25, up from
21 in 1970.
Some choices (Paper or plastic? Coffee or espresso? X-Factor or The Voice?)
are easy. But some—like when to have a baby—can be more of a challenge.
“When my husband, Bret, and I started to discuss having a baby, we lived in California,
while my family was back on the East Coast,” says Caley Bowman, 32, a
marketing manager in Asheville, N.C. “I wasn’t sure I wanted to be so far away from
them. Plus, I’m really active and didn’t know if I was ready to give up my lifestyle.
Then there were the finances to consider. Could we afford it?”
Caley and Bret mulled parenthood for months before finally deciding they were
ready. Some couples struggle with the idea even longer. “So many factors go into
the decision, and it’s different for every couple,” says Lisa Mazzullo, MD, assistant
professor of obstetrics and gynecology at Northwestern University Feinberg School
of Medicine.
How do you know? If you can answer “yes” to these four questions, you might be
more prepared than you realize.
EXPERT TIP
“Examine your own personal attitude toward the
unexpected. If you feel a bit squeamish about relinquishing
control over certain things, you might not be ready.”
—Sarah DuMond, MD
JAN/FEB 2013 29 W ebMD.coM
Watch Prepare Your Body for Pregnancy,
the No. 2 Pregnancy video at WebMD.com,
for prenatal get-in-shape tips.
.com
1. Is your relationship healthy? Or,
if you’re single, do you have a strong
support system? “Healthy does not
mean perfect,” says Mazzullo. But
you should be able to communicate
well, have mutual respect for each
other, and share tasks well. “Any
stress that a couple has around
money, sex, or family should be
dealt with before getting pregnant,”
she says.
2. Are you ready to focus outside of
your career? Even though men can
shift their priorities once a baby is in
the picture, women face more challenges,
including the physical ones
of pregnancy (fatigue and physical
strain) as well as possible guilt
surrounding the decision whether
to keep working. “Couples need to
decide together what the plan will
be—if someone will quit working or
if they’ll seek child care outside the
home,” says Mazzullo. “It can be an
emotional decision, so it’s better to
make it before you get pregnant.”
3. Do you know the maternity/
paternity policy at work? Every
company is different, says Mazzullo,
and you need to make sure you have
a plan in place, whether it’s saving
up vacation time, using short-term
disability, or saving your pennies
and taking unpaid time off for the
first few months of your baby’s life.
4. Are you financially ready? “This
doesn’t mean you have to have a fivebedroom
house, two cars, and all
your credit cards paid off,” says Mazzullo.
“But you should have enough
disposable income to comfortably
afford the basics—diapers, child
care, medical expenses.”
reviewed by Sara DuMond, MD
Webmd Baby Care expert