December 2004 Ensign - The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day ...

wisdom. And he gave us an opportunity
to serve and learn constant love.
Try to be a part of the family and
not just a boarder in the house. If
your health permits, participate in
family home evening, family meals,
and family prayer, and attend church
with your family.
Be willing to accept service. You
served your children as they were
growing up; now it is their turn to
serve you. Give them that opportunity.
Scherelyn Jensen, Rolling Valley Ward,
Annandale Virginia Stake
Tips for Caregivers
When I was about 10 years old, my
grandmother came to live with our
family. I loved my grandmother, and
my life was enriched in many ways by
the time we spent together. However,
much pain and confusion could have
been avoided if our parents had
brought us children together in a
family council ahead of time to talk
about what would be happening.
Before the elderly loved one
moves in, give all family members an
opportunity to share their feelings
without criticism, and encourage
them to contribute to a plan for helping
the loved one feel welcome. This
is a wonderful time to teach about
family responsibility in a positive way
and to help each generation learn to
value the blessings of others.
Lynda Bennett, Milton-Freewater Ward,
Walla Walla Washington Stake
My husband and I had the privilege
of caring for my mother a few years
ago. Here are several suggestions
based on our experience:
•Immediately make appointments
with medical professionals to
establish necessary contacts. Doctors
seldom accept new patients in emergency
situations.
•Contact community agencies or
offices on aging to learn what support
resources are available in your
area. We arranged for my mother to
stay in a nice adult day care facility.
In many areas there are also inhome
services for those with special
needs. This will take some investigating
to find resources you are
comfortable with.
•Find out about group homes
and assisted living residences,
which often accept seniors temporarily
for respite care when the
caregiver has to go out of town or
otherwise needs this service. Gathering
this information will also help
you become familiar with alternative
living situations should that become
necessary in the future.
•Make sure that all end-of-life
plans are in order, such as wills
or trusts, living wills, instructions
regarding location of important
documents, and so on.
Heather Schoeny, Savage Mill Ward,
Columbia Maryland Stake
• If the parent is unable to leave
the home, arrange to have the sacrament
brought to him or her.
• If possible, take your parent with
you to Church events or other activities.
Even a trip to the drugstore can
add excitement to life. I took my
Elderly family members can contribute
much to the loving atmosphere
in a home.
father on at least one outing every
day as long as he was able.
• If other relatives live nearby, suggest
that they invite the elderly person
to instruct them or their children
in some areas of expertise. This helps
the elderly person know he or she is
of worth.
Judith LaMontagne, South Whidbey Island
Ward, Everett Washington Stake
Time for self should be a priority,
even if in small amounts. Regular
dates with a spouse are essential,
especially temple trips. Understand
that the senior family member may
strongly discourage your absence,
possibly due to fear. But caretakers
will be happier and better able to fulfill
their responsibilities if they have
consistent renewal time. ■
Andrea Walter, Chardon Branch, Kirtland
Ohio Stake
PHOTOGRAPH BY STEVE BUNDERSON
ENSIGN DECEMBER 2004 45