Grade 4 – Personal and Fictional Narrative Rubric

A Trip to The Zoo
Fourth Grade
It was a bright sunny morning My sisters and I were
getting ready to go to the zoo. We had just gotten are
favorite outfits on. Then we went downstairs and we all had
are absoult favorite cereals. Mine was coco puffs. After we
ate, we heard our mom and stepdad yelled “ARE YOU GIRLS
READY YET” we yelled back “OF COURSE.” They knew we
wouldn’t miss the zoo for anything. Next we had to put are
delishuse lunchs into are paper bags that we had decorated.
Then our mom and stepdad finally were ready and came
downstairs. We told tem we pack their boring lunchs to.
Finally it was time to go to the zoo. Are parents told us it
might take a while because we were going to the Sacramento
zoo.
We finally got to the zoo. First we saw the tigers,
lions, and bears. My sister thought the bears were scary.
Then we saw so many other animals I can’t even remember all
their names. Then we went on a tiger rollercoaster. We went
on it about 4 times. Then when we were on it for the 3 rd time
my sister screamed so loud that I felt like I was going to die.
Then we had to go home. On that long ride home our parents
knew my sisters and I had had the best time of our lifes. The
End
Rubric Score 2:
The writer clearly states his/her
main idea and stays on topic the
whole paper. There is an obvious
beginning, middle, end and an
attempt to show emotion when
the writer states, “my sister
screamed so loud that I felt like I
was going to die.”
There was an effort to show
voice through the use of humor
when she described the
“delishuse” and “boring” lunches.
To make the voice effective they
would need to add meaningful
details to that section.
The sentence fluency is adequate
with attempts to blend dialogue
and sentence length. (“Are you
girls ready yet” and “Mine was
coco puffs”)
Use of conventions is good with
some spelling errors that do not
interfere with meaning.
This paper is a 2 on a 4 point
rubric