December 2008 / January 2009 - Association of Dutch Businessmen

Column By…
Yet another weekend
Richard Soemita
Most of you who have been in Singapore for over a
year will notice that there will come a time when
you think ‘what the hell will I do this weekend?’.
Of course this is not the case when you have a
family (especially with kids), have lots and lots of ‘real
friends’ (expats, not locals) and are as pathetic like the locals
that shop all the time as soon as they have a spare minute.
I’m talking about a single guy (+ daughter) like me or even
young couples that wanna do more than enjoying the great
Singapore culture. Ehhh, shopping or working that is!
During the first few months you explore the club scene
and all the bars. Apart from spending half your salary on a
good night out (drinks are so expensive!) you will find out
very soon that the club scene is not that fantastic here. They
are either too crowded, too young, too many prostitutes
(who do a good job in disguising themselves, pretending
they are locals on a night out), bands playing the same songs
in the exact same order, too dark so you get scared to be
groped by a ladyboy or it is freezing so hard that even the
wildest techno music will not make you sweat. With regards
to bars I have not found my ‘local’ yet apart from one bar
that I go to with colleagues since this one is 10 steps away
from the office and one does not want to waste valuable
‘beer time’. Harry’s on Boat Quay is of course so-so, that is
if you do not want to bump into the Dutch colony. There are
a few nice rooftop bars and Holland Village does have a bit
of the European atmosphere mostly created by 99% of white
folks walking around and their kids terrorising the blocked
off street with their scooters or skateboards. Basically it
is the locals that I blame for the dull atmosphere. Did you
ever wonder why you never come across ‘strange characters’
(type of village idiot you come across in Amsterdam in every
neighbourhood) or groups of boys celebrating a stag night?
In Amsterdam I come across idiots on a daily basis, so bad
that when you meet someone ‘normal’ you think that he is
the idiot! What I’m saying here is that if the locals act a bit
more like idiots and stop worrying about losing face, life would
be a lot more fun on this island!
Once you have done all the clubs and bars, including
Orchard Towers, one will start exploring Asia. Bali, Bangkok,
Ho Chi Min, Hong Kong, Hanoi, Siem Reap etc. Most of us have
seen all these places in the first 3 months. You can always tell
if someone has been a bit longer here in Singapore when they
say that they are off for a long weekend to Wellington, Bombay
or Sydney. My Dutch friend, just hops over to California and
hardly knows where Amsterdam is, but that happens when you
are in Singapore for donks!
Even artists avoid Singapore except if you are Paul Anka,
The Osmond Family, Jose Feliciano or Rick Ashley. Perhaps
they want to see Singapore a last time before they pop off,
since I thought that most of them were already dead! I will not
mention the exorbitant ticket price you have to pay too, you
should be paid when going to Paul Anka’s funeral…ehh concert!
Then again would you go to Paul or Tsai Chin?
Have you ever been to a concert here and wondered if
people are really listening carefully or if everyone has fallen
asleep? Everyone here sits very docile on their seat and
you never hear the occasional ‘yeah’ or ‘right on’ from the
audience. The last time I shouted ‘oooh yeah!’ in the Esplanade
everyone in front of me, including the first and second rings
turned around and looked at me like I should be locked up for
20 years. Last year I saw this Japanese band in Paradiso and
The Melkweg called the Tokyo Ska Paradise Orchestra. This
band has 11 members and one cannot sit still when one sees
their amazing performance. I therefore had serious question
marks why this band would visit the Esplanade. Where would
we dance and could we burn down the roof? This band already
exists for many years and has a huge Japanese support. This
was noticeable during the concert and as soon as the first tune
was blasted into the crowd everyone jumped up and stormed
to the front: all Japanese, the angmohs and me! But within
seconds a large army of security guards controlled the group
and we were all summoned to go back to our seats. Dancing
was allowed in front of your seat, but only there. You could
spot all the locals immediately who refused to stand up and
remain seated.
It therefore is quite clear that everyone without realizing,
flees the island. As far as great art exhibitions go we can forget
these since only a handful people will visit these. On my last
visit to the Historical museum I noticed that most of the space
was taken up by this bar and restaurant and the museum part
kind of looked pretty empty.
I also wonder how much entertainment the new IR
Project will provide. Not sure if Europeans are waiting for
more canto-pop discos and a casino which probably will only
attract mainland Chinese and other gamble-crazy Asians.
Looks like I will continue my long weekends in Amsterdam or
‘relax’ on Sundays at East Coast Park where most of the island
hangs around on a strip slightly wider than and as long as the
Kalverstraat. Try to find a quiet spot!
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Vol.18 • No. 10 • December 2008 / January 2009