Recognising and Responding to Domestic and Family Violence

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Do’s s and Don’ts ts- Cont’d ‣ Be patient and understanding about her indecision- she will decide what she wants to do when she is ready to ‣ Realise your own limitations. You can’t control the violence any more than the victim can. It may be impossible to do anything except offer your support DO NOT: ‣ Reassure her that everything will be OK ‣ Volunteer as a “go-between” as you may increase the problems (and your own) ‣ Take any actions which may increase the violence (e.g. leaving phone numbers where he may find them) ‣ Tell her to leave or stay. It is her decision. She needs your support and will not trust you if the only way to get it is to leave the relationship or stay in it. She is the expert over her own life
Do’s s and Don’ts ts- Cont’d ‣ Blame her for what has happened. It is not her fault ‣ Take over for her. She needs to act on her own behalf to rebuild her self-esteem ‣ Belittle or condemn the abuser, but still put the responsibility for the violence on him. When you agree with her negative sentiments towards the abuser, she may feel uncomfortable talking to you if she changes her mind or if she still has some feeling of loved and attachment to him ‣ Pressure her into making decisions. She needs time to sort out her feelings and make reasoned decisions ‣ Minimise her feelings or experiences, or divert the focus to other problems due to your discomfort. She will lose confidence in your ability to understand/help her ‣ Attack her as a parent. She may have difficulty acting for her children’s safety as well as her own ‣ Tell her how to change her behaviour in the relationship to stop his violence. She does not control his violence and she cannot cure it
Page 1 and 2: Recognising and Responding to Domes
Page 3 and 4: Introduction Continued This present
Page 5 and 6: Facts about Domestic/Family Violenc
Page 7 and 8: Effects on Women ‣ Isolation ‣
Page 9 and 10: Effects on Women- Cont’d ‣ Ange
Page 11 and 12: Effects on Children/Young People- C
Page 13 and 14: Effects on Children/Young People Co
Page 15 and 16: Case Scenario - Cont’d ‣ When y
Page 17 and 18: Recognising DV- Cont’d ‣ She ma
Page 19 and 20: Raising the Issue of Violence ‣ T
Page 21 and 22: Raising the Issue of Violence- Cont
Page 23 and 24: Raising the Issue of Violence with
Page 25 and 26: Responding to a Disclosure Be aware
Page 27 and 28: Responding to a Disclosure- Cont’
Page 29 and 30: Responding & Intervention with Chil
Page 31 and 32: The ABCDE Model of Intervention- Co
Page 33 and 34: Referral & Safety Planning- Cont’
Page 35 and 36: Referral & Safety Planning- Cont’
Page 37 and 38: A Safety Plan For Children ‣ Ofte
Page 39: Working with Survivors- Do’s s an
Page 43 and 44: Self-Care ‣ Caring for yourself w
Page 45 and 46: Self-Care Care- Cont’d If you ar

Recognising and Responding to Domestic and Family Violence

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