HLI Chronicle 1915 - The Royal Highland Fusiliers

HIGHLAND tIGHT INFANTRY CHRONICLE.
Si
11th Battalion Notes.
THE DOINGS OF JOHN DONNOLLY,
REGnrENTAL Q.M.S.
On Service" Somewhere in France."
(Not to be communicated to the Press.)
JOHN DONNOLLY, Regimental Q.M.S. of the
11th Battalion H.L.I., at a certain place in
France and on a certain date, was suddenly
afflicted with a brain wave (or what the higher
military authorities would term a " brilliant
military scheme "). It took the form of a
sudden desire to endeavour to relieve our
worthy Quartermaster, Lieut. DrawbeIl, of
one of his most strenuous duties-namely, to
draw supplies. Now, as everybody knows
who knows active service and billets, drawing
supplies necessitates in most cases the covering
of a few miles (to be more precise, kilometres,
in this part of the world), and, in addition, an
early start.
Now, these two facts were undoubtedly
the cause of the following catastrophe. On
the evening of the day before John Donnolly
was at some pains to assure the Quartermaster
that he could proceed to to draw supplies
the following morning. So persistent was he
in affirming this fact that the Quartermaster
began to think he had been wasting his time
drawing supplies at all. It was eventually
decided that John Dormolly would draw
them the following morning. Now, on service
it is a strict rule that nobody rides on wagons
except the driver, and he rides on the horse's
back, so the next question to be settled was
how John Donnolly was to get to the place
of issue (Regimental Quartermaster-Sergts.
not usually being guilty of walking further
than necessary-in peace time usually from
the Stores to the Sergeants' Mess, and sometimes
vice versa). A bicycle was out of the
question, due to the fact that our frienrl could
not ride one, so the Quartermaster suggested
his horse. Yes, John could ride a horse (we
thought he had been a cowboy in his younger
days by the way he talked), so it was arranged
that the transport sergeant would have the
Quartermaster's horse saddled up at 5-30
a.m., ready to start. The Quartermaster
determined then and there to have a long
lie in the next morning,
At 5-30 a.m. in Regimental Headquarters
there is as a rule nothing doing; therefore
wh~n John appeared on the scene at that
hour one solitary transport man, plus the
sentry at the gate and the Quartermaster's
horse, was the only visible sign of life. Exaotly
what happened at 5-30 a.m. precise I do not
know, but within a few moments the whole
camp was aroused by the yells of the tram!­
port man calling for help. John Donnolly
could not get up on the horse's back! Several
transport men, in night attire, together with
the transport sergeant, rushed to the scene,
and after very strenuous efforts at last
succeeded in getting .John into the saddle
and started on his journey. Now, the distance
from this point to the exit gate was 50 yards,
a distance John covered beautifully. Arriving
at the gate something happened. Neither
the gentle persuasion of the sentry nor the
kind words of John could move the fiery
steed another inch. Oonsiderable and valuable
time was therefore lost, and rations for that
day were· in jeopardy, when John decided
to dismount by the simple expedient of
sliding down the animal's tail, a method of
dismounting recommended by John. At about
6-15 a.m. the transport man was seen leading
the horse back to billets, and .rohn was
marching to draw rations. The incident has
caused great controversy in the camp. Some
maintain that, being so early in the morning,
the horse was asleep, and consequently could
not go, while others say the light touch of
John's hands on the reins reminded the brute
of the days he used to draw a dray, and, not
being desirous of reverting to his former
occupation, he decided not to move. At all
events rations were late, and the veterinary
surgeon certifies that the horse is suffering
from a severe fit of laughing-so much so that
when we are on the march they have to blindfold
the brute on the approach of a Regimental
Quartermaster-Sergeant, and the Quartermaster
continues to draw supplies.
DonnoIly Sahib now suffers terribly with
nightmare, and has visions of fiery steeds.
Finis.-As the worthy John is jealous of
his reputation as an equestrian he has decided
to return to his old love, the wooden horse,:
in preference to the meat one.