NEWSLETTER CONTENTS - Marathon Maniacs

NEWSLETTER CONTENTS 

Summer 7 2-3 

Cook Park Marathon 4-5 

The Marathon Show 5 

Stars and Stripes Marathon 6-7 

Foot Traffic Flat Marathon 8 

Missoula Marathon 9-11 

Marathon Maniac Book 11 

Tunnel Marathon 12-13 

Badwater Ultra 14 

Badwater Reports 15-18 

Great Cranberry Island Ultra 19-21 

Half Fanatics 21 

Wild Thing Summer Fling 22 

Social Networking 22 

San Francisco Marathon 23-24 

Rosaryville 50k 25 

Maniac Poll 25 

Desert News Marathon 26 

Report from the InSane AlyLum 26 

Promotions 27 

Calendar 28 

New Maniacs 29 

Note from the Editor 30 

Discounts 31 

Rhetorical Revelations 

from “The Rev” 32 

Volume 9, Number 7

Steve Hernandez 

Ed 

Ettinghausen 

CAR Summer Seven Race One (6/28): Haywood Crowder, Ed "Mad Hatter-Fancy Pants" Ettinghausen, Chris Jones, Pete "Island 

Wolf" Mingwah, Rocky Morales, Irish Joe Reilly, Brady Wentlandt, Shawna Wentlandt, Marina 'vasolina' White 

CAR Summer Seven Race Two (6/29): Haywood Crowder, Ed "Mad Hatter-Fancy Pants" Ettinghausen, Chris Jones, Larissa "Nordic 

Moxie" MM Diva #8,Pete "Island Wolf" Mingwah, Irish Joe Reilly, Brady Wentlandt, Shawna Wentlandt, Marina 'vasolina' White 

CAR Summer Seven Race Three (6/30): Haywood Crowder, Ed "Mad Hatter-Fancy Pants" Ettinghausen, Chris Jones, Pete "Island 

Wolf" Mingwah, Rocky Morales, Irish Joe Reilly, Guillermo Rios, Brady Wentlandt, Shawna Wentlandt, Marina 'vasolina' White 

CAR Summer Seven Race Four (7/1): Haywood Crowder, Ed "Mad Hatter-Fancy Pants" Ettinghausen, Chris Jones, Andrea 

Kooiman, Pete "Island Wolf" Mingwah, Irish Joe Reilly, Brady Wentlandt, Shawna Wentlandt, Marina 'vasolina' White 

CAR Summer Seven Race Five (7/2): Haywood Crowder, Ed "Mad Hatter-Fancy Pants" Ettinghausen, Chris Jones, Andrea 

Kooiman, Pete "Island Wolf" Mingwah, Rocky Morales, Irish Joe Reilly, Brady Wentlandt, Shawna Wentlandt, Marina 'vasolina' 

White 

CAR Summer Seven Race Six (7/3): Haywood Crowder, Ed "Mad Hatter-Fancy Pants" Ettinghausen, Chris Jones, Andrea 

Kooiman, Pete "Island Wolf" Mingwah, Irish Joe Reilly, Brady Wentlandt, Shawna Wentlandt, Marina 'vasolina' White 

CAR Summer Seven Race Seven (7/4): Haywood Crowder, Ed "Mad Hatter-Fancy Pants" Ettinghausen, Chris Jones, Andrea 

Kooiman, Ryan "Ultra Pussycat" Launder, Pete "Island Wolf" Mingwah, Jessica "Wabbitz" Montoya, Rocky Morales, Irish Joe 

Reilly,Brady Wentlandt, Shawna Wentlandt, Marina 'vasolina' White 

http://www.marathonmaniacs.com 

The 

Wentlandt 

Family 

Joe Reilly Rocky Morales 

Larry 

Macon 

2

Yolanda Holder 


Pete Mingwah 

Chris Jones 

Tony Nguyen 

Summer Seven Finishers! 

Shawna Wentlandt 

Andrea Kooiman 

3

Cyndie Merten Thanh Nguyen 


Heather 

Zeigler 

Peter Corduan and PJ Krostag 

Oregon Honey Badgers 

on the tear! 

Amy Lynes 

Cook Park Marathon (6/30): 

Tomer Benyair, Diane 

"Sparkle Skirts" Bolton, Mary 

Coffelt, Peter "Pedro Max" 

Corduan, Tom "Drag-on" 

Craven, Hope Fox, Carol 

Goslin, Ryan Jeynes, Lana 

Mades, Terri Menghini, 

Cyndie Merten, Katherine 

Murphy, Pascal Radley, Rose's 

Revenge, IronMel, Lichu Wu 

Sloan, Heather Zeigler 

4

Pascal Radley 

Steve Hopper 

Stephanie Duncan 

The Marathon Show (hosted by Maniac #1817, Joe Taricani) was first broadcast in June 2010. It’s a one of a 

kind show that spot lights the marathon and marathon runners. Maniacs have found a safe haven with this 

great show. A few times a week Joe broadcast the show live online, the shows are then made available to 

download from iTunes (via Podcast). Each week Joe features a marathoner, and often does shout outs to 

marathoners from all over. Another great part of this show is the “runners chat”, in these shows Joe gets 

three marathoners together and does a round table discussion Elaine about Green many great topics. So if you have 

already come across the show, please do. 

Check it out and tune in! http://www.themarathonshow.com 


Melissa Williams 

Cheryl 

Murdock 

Maniac Winners! 

Carol Goslin 

Fay 

Westenhofer 

Will Flint 

Gail Henry and Mary Coffelt 

Howard 

Fan 

Cameron James 

5

Terri Menghini 

Tom 

Craven 

Wally Rubio 


Lori Jensen 

Fay Westenhofer and Cheryl Murdock 

Will Flint 

Rick Haase 

Howard Fan 

Eric Jensen 

Angie Huggins 

Katherine 

Murphy 

6

Marathon female 

winner Heather 

Zeigler 

Stars and Stripes Marathon (7/1): Linda Ambard, Tomer Benyair, 

Diane "Sparkle Skirts" Bolton, Mary Coffelt, Peter "Pedro Max" 

Corduan, Tom "Drag-on" Craven, Hope Fox, Carol Goslin, Rick 

"Roadkill A.S." Haase, Angie Huggins, Vincent Ma, Terri Menghini, 

Cyndie Merten, Katherine Murphy, Pascal Radley, Rose's Revenge, 

IronMel, Lichu Wu Sloan, Heather Zeigler 

Terri Menghini and Pascal Radley 

Katherine Murphy and her four stars! 


Diane Bolton 

Fay Westenhofer 

Tomer Benyair 

and 

Vincent Ma 

Roger Chou 

PJ 

Krostag 

Honey Badgers! 

Mary Coffelt and New Maniac 

Angelika Steinberg earn 4 stars! Lichu Sloan 

PJ Krostag 

Howard Fan joins the Maniacs with 

4 stars! 

7

Stephanie Duncan Jon Dotson Heather Zeigler and Missy Peters 

Angie Huggins and Jon Dotson 

Foot Traffic Flat Marathon (7/4): David Aldous, Stacy Anderson, Robert Bondurant, Cormac Burke, Anita Dabrowska, Kris 'CLYDESDALE' Damiano, 

Carol "Ponytail" Earles, Al Emma, Kerri Haskins, Bob Hearn, Fiona Hoffman-Harland, Angie Huggins, Bob "Birdman" Kennedy, Steve Miller "Not the 

Band", Heather Nugent, Jason Park, Mark Parrotte, Monte Pascual, Missy Peters, Irish Joe Reilly, sLuG w/sTaRs, Kirk Stafford, Craig Thompson, Gary 

"Ben Franklin" Walker, Steve "Marathon Freak" Walters, Kelly Watanabe, Darwin "runninguy" Weimer, Terry "rocketgirl" Weimer, IronMel, Courtney 

Willson, Rusty Willson, Heather Zeigler 


Melissa 

Williams 

Cyndie Merten 

The Weimers from 

Canada 

Bob 

Hearn 

8

Joe Reilly 

Ryan Snyder 


Wendy 

Prindle 

Allen 

Thomas 

Mike 

Chewar 

Maria Poranski and Laura Gorycki 

9

Michael 

Wakabayashi 

Jenny Appel 

Carol 

Goslin 


Missoula Marathon (7/8): Jenny Appel, Miranda Bachman, Cheryl Baumann, Marc 

Bergman, Jeff "Boneman" Bollman, Ken Briggs, Lan Bui, John Burke, Jacob Case, Bijou 

Chacko, run2thehills, Mike Chewar, "Runner Lis" Cooper, James "Gimme my Medal" Copley, 

Danielle Cupido, Teota Dangel, Cindy DeSirant, Elizabeth Detter, Steph Eldore, Al Emma, 

Alicia MM Diva #3, Deb Evdemon, Anders "Biking Viking" Forselius, Maria Frosth, Laura 

Gorycki, Carol Goslin, Georgeta (GG!) Gruescu, Brenda Gutmann, "Insane Jane", Jim Higgins, 

Gloria Hinton, Sherri Hotzler, Jill Hudson, Adam Irvin, Brian Jones, Valerie Kilcoin, Hideki 

"Kino" Kinoshita, Gary Kobold, Paulette Kosinski, Mark Kramer, PK, Mark Lehrmann, Vincent 

Ma, Lana Mades, Dave Mari, Tracy Marshall, Lacey Martinosky, Denis McCarthy, Jack 

McDermott, Al " on to sub 4/50 states McGowan, Laura Milak, William Milak, Jean Neely, 

Nancy Oh "Nano", Jackie Panfili, Sue Parks, Mark Parrotte, Stephen Payne, tony (tp!) 

phillippi, Cheri Pompeo, Maria Poranski, Aaron Redinger, Shanan Redinger, Irish Joe Reilly, 

Cade Remsburg, Chris Revoir, Michael "Dr Dude" Rhodes, Jim "Dr. Evil" Roche, Jc "The Saint" 

Santa Teresa, Angela Schut, Lori Schwartz, Mike Schwartz, Doug Shanks, McGyver, Michael 

Shilling, Kenji Shime, Susan Siragusa, Barry "dcgriz" Smith, Ryan "Rye" Snyder, Andrea 

Spohn, Chuck Struckness, Ben Tam, Big Al Thomas, Craig Thompson, Joni "why rush?" Van 

Arsdale, Eddie "Star" Vega, Deneen Waddell, Michael Wakabayashi, Gregg Walchli, Michelle 

"Mom o' 6" Walker, Steve "Marathon Freak" Walters, Jeffrey "Wardium" Ward, Francine 

Weigeldt, Darwin "runninguy" Weimer, Terry "rocketgirl" Weimer, Julie Wells, Kat White, 

Angie Whitworth Pace, Brian Wright, Li-Chym Wu, Prez Steven Yee, Jonathan Young, Rob 

(Rocket Man-iac) Young 

The Biking Viking hits the air! 

Aaron and Shanon Redinger Andrea 

Spohn 

Jeff 

Bollman 

Eddie Vega 

10

Edwin Wagnild 

Maria Frosth 


The Prez 

casts a spell! 

Rob 

Young 

Lis Cooper 

Jonathan Young 

Dave Mari 

Elizabeth Detter 

In February the Main Maniacs released the Marathon Maniacs book! 

This book is collection of stories by members of the Marathon Maniacs. 

These stories are sure to be encouraging and motivation to current and 

future members. The book was edited by Maniac Malcolm Anderson 

author of the book “The Messengers”. 

Be sure to get your copy of the book and enjoy the 

stories of the World’s Most Insane Running Club! 

Craig and Lacey 

Martinosky 

Michelle Walker, Marc 

Bergman and Andrea Spohn 

http://www.databarevents.com/shopproductdetail.asp?prodID=105&catID=14 

11

Pedro Infante 

runs his 100 th ! 


Sabrina 

Shana 

Tolean 

Maniac of the year 

winners Susie Ro 

and Diana Robinson 

with tp! 

Rick Cooney 

Flat “Shoe” (Michael Hsu) 

gets a kiss from Kristin 

Parker. 

Michael Hsu 

gets a ride on 

the back of 

Paige Denison. 

Congrats to 

Robert Lopez for 

running his 333 rd 

and qualifying 

for the Hall of 

Fame! 

12

Herb 

Allen 

Light at the End of the Tunnel Marathon (7/15): Miranda Bachman, Steve Barrick, LeadFoot, Marc Bergman, Rikki "Bobbie" Bogue, Chris Boundy, 

Garry Bragg, Ken Briggs, Steve Brown, May Cheng, Sarah Colby, Rick Cooney, Gary Cote', Paige Denison, vvn Doorn, Ted Eckert, Scott Elderkin, 

Deidre Emerson, Sarah Englund, Deb Evdemon, Judy Fisher, Jim Fox, Andy Fritz, Lynn Frosch, Greg Glockner, Margaret Gorog, Ginger Gruber, Rick 

"Roadkill A.S." Haase, Davin Hagman, David Hamilton, Mary "mph" Hanna, Claudia Hansen, Micaela Jensen, Laura Johnson, Tania Johnson, Barefoot 

Jon, David Jones, William Kenneweg, Ethel Marie Kitching, Gary Kobold, Jim Kondek, Brandy Layton, Robert 3x111 Lopez, Mike Mahanay, Jon 

"Coconutboy" Mahoney, Jules Mann, Tracy Marshall, Larissa "Nordic Moxie" MM Diva #8, Jim McGoorty, Laura Milak, William Milak, Little Leslie, 

Barney, Suzanne Nester, Gary Otheim, KP, Talva Parker, Monte Pascual, George Pemberton, Maria Pemberton, The Programmer, Jeff "Slice!" 

Pettett, Cheri Pompeo, Suzanne Potts, Marilou "Dovenator" Russell, Bill Ralph, Amy Rand, Bob Reid, Lisa "Cupcake" Reid, S, sLuG w/sTaRs, Katie 

Robinson, Tom Rogers, Jason Ryan, Melinda Scharf, Paul Schmitz, Joe Schrum (Just Joe), Shannon Schulz, Tom Scott, Sabrina, McGyver, Michael 

Shiach, "Marathon Diet", Rob Stretz, Nikki Todd, Shana "Rustynail" Tolean, Jennifer Tyron, Gary "Ben Franklin" Walker, Linda Walter, Jason Weekes, 

Larry "Is it Still Sunday?" Welch, Dan Whitaker, Karen Wiggins, IronMel, Brett Wittner, Ashley Wright 

Mary Hanna 

Talva 

Parker 

Barefoot Jon 


Amy 

Rand 

Michael Lynes 

Vivian Doorn Margaret Gorog 

Ethel Marie Kitching 

Scott Krell 

Pedro 

Infante 

Monte Pascual 

Linda 

Walter 

Marilou Russell 

Jules Mann 

13


Heidi Perry and her High Voltage Team Ed Ettinghausen and 

his Team Jester Team 

Badwater Ultramarathon (7/16): Dave Carver, Ed "Mad Hatter-Fancy 

Pants" Ettinghausen, Claude Hicks Jr., Bradford Lombardi, Michael "Uncle 

Mike" Miller, Heidi Perry, Terry Sentinella 

Tony Portera and his team 

Michael Miller and his team 

Claude 

Hicks Jr 

Terry Sentinella and his team 

Dave Carver 

14

BADWATER REPORT: TERRY SENTINELLA (#112) 

Destination: Portals of Mount Whitney……… 

Badwater 135 Ultramarathon is a race that seems out of reach to almost everyone. How does a person get to the point they can tackle all the obstacles this race provides, or do they 

actually ever reach this pinnacle? Running in 130 degree heat alone is a major factor, climbing Townes Pass, 17 miles and 5,000’ of ascent after running 41 miles in intense heat alone 

will cripple most runners. Then after Townes Pass you have a gnarly descent into Panamint Springs, then a 20 mile and 3,300’ ascent into Panamint Pass. When you get to the top of 

this pass you’re only at mile 90, yes you have 45 miles to go, and the last massive climb to the Portals of Mount Whitney. Every aspect of this race has to be planned and executed to 

perfection to finish with your best time. It is a MONSTER! 

As a rookie last year it scared the heck out of me when I received my acceptance letter. The fact that I had never run in temperatures above 100 degrees, and when I did run in temps 

over 80 degrees I always had issues. In preparation for the 2011 race I read everything I could and watched all the documentaries I could find. My hard work panned out last year 

and allowed me to finish, but not like I wanted to. 


The lessons I learned last year from “what didn’t go as well as planned” I worked on this year: 

1. Just heat training in my car and 3 -4 weekly, 45 minute sauna sessions was not enough. 

2. The inability to run after 105 miles because of inadequate endurance training on the road. 

3. The inability to eat anything solid for most of the race hindered my performance. 

4. Stopping too many times at the aid vehicle and at Stove Pipe Wells wasted time. 

This year I made a plan to work on these issues in hopes for better finish time. I ran Labor of Love 100 

mile run in April with “absolutely no heat training”. I was in 1st place through mile 50 only to be 

overtaken by fellow maniacs Michael Miller and Claude Hicks. The 90 degree heat and starting too fast 

really took a toll on this Washington State Runner (it was about 50 degrees here at home) . I took this 

loss as a lesson learned always respect every aspect of the race, heat, distance, hills, road, other 

competitors, etc. 

My next race was Keys 100 in May. The race started early in the morning, temps only reached about 80 

degrees and humidity was about 80%. I was kind of bummed it wasn’t hotter, but it was flat and all road, 

so it provided me a great training opportunity to practice running even when the flat road took a toll. 

Towards the end of the race, when I was tired, and having a tough time running, I started running 3 

telephone pole distances and power walking 1. I continued this for about 40 miles of the race. This 

turned out to be a great tool to keep me moving forward as fast as I could. I finished in 10th and 1st in 

my AG. Best of all it taught me the valuable lesson; when it’s all falling apart there is usually something 

you can do to move, you just gotta think smart and keep moving to that finish line. 

My last long distance training run was San Diego 100. I love this race because it is in the mountains and mostly trail. This race is a perfect mix of heat, tough ascents and descents, 

flat, and has awesome aid stations. Really a perfect training race for Badwater. My goal in this race was to run 90% of the race at a slow steady pace and finish under 24 hours. 

Everything went as planned which was a real boost to my mental Badwater training. 

It was a mental boost knowing all 3 of my training 100’s went well, I was able to take something away from each one, and apply these lessons to my Badwater mental checklist . This 

is what I needed to finish and finish well at Badwater. 

With the endurance aspect down I still needed to work on heat. I decided to live and train in the heat for 2 weeks prior to the big race. I drove to Death Valley and trained for 4 days 

with Bradford Lombardi. We ran from Lone Pine to the finish line one day (13 miles), we summitted Mount Whitney another day (22 miles), I paced Terry Abrahms during her solo 

attempt for a short distance, and ran many training runs all over Lone Pine. Then I headed to Florence, Arizona to a friend’s house that was vacant. Upon arriving I turned the air 

conditioner up to 90 degrees and lived in the heat. In the mornings I took a 5 – 6 mile power walk trying to maintain between 13 – 14 minute miles, and during the heat of the day ran 

10 – 15 miles. Occasionally I would also go for a long power walk in the evening as well. This proved to be essential in acclimating to the heat and learning how to walk fast. 

A few things I didn’t do was work on my nutritional needs and I forgot to instruct my crew to make their stops every 3 to 4 miles instead of every 2 miles. These 2 things I need to 

improve on before my next Badwater attempt in 2014. In 2013 I plan on pacing Amy Costa. Hopefully I can assist her in winning. 

The race this year was amazing, the temperatures only reached 112 degrees, 15 degrees cooler than last year. The headwind going up Townes Pass was BRUTAL 40 – 50 mph 

headwind. Once I reached Stove Pipe Wells the race went absolutely perfect. I passed a ton of runners and wasn’t passed by anyone. Having the perfect crew and a great training 

plan I was able to execute the race to meet my top goal of sub 30 hours and top 10 overall. This doesn’t happen too often, but when it does it is magical! 

This year I had 3 of my crew/pacers return from last year; my wife Delores Sentinella HF, Kevin Douglas MM, Faye Guastamacchio, Rob Bondurant HF MM, Dylan Owens, Bobbie 

Metrokin HF. Having 3 veteran Badwater crew members who knew my faults and strengths was vital to our success. We had one breakfast meeting in Las Vegas, on Friday before the 

race, where I explained a few things I felt could be improved upon from last year, my faults, my strengths, my expectations from the crew, and told them what I felt each of their roles 

would be on the team. Then I gave them the reins, stood back and let them develop their team. This is very hard for a type A personality like me. I am a planner and organizer, 

everything has to be perfect or I’m all out of sorts. I was amazed how comfortable I felt in their hands. It is a good feeling to know your crew is going to handle everything perfectly. 

One of the things that makes this race amazing is this team concept, kind of like a relay race, except the members are crewing and pacing, and just one person is running the whole 

thing. The whole team depends on the runner to run smart and finish, and the runner depends on the crew to take care of their needs as well as their own needs. The runner needs 

their crew and the crew needs their runner. 

I consider myself a trail ultramarathoner. I run races 50k distance or shorter to stay in shape for my 100 mile events. As you well know Badwater is all road. You would think a trail 

guy would hate running 135 miles on the road. It is kind of strange, but this race has a lure that keeps drawing me back. I just love the heat, the desert, the amazing views, the level 

of difficulty, the team feeling, the amazing competitors. It is very cool to know as a participant of this race you are selected from some of the best ultrarunners in the world. Very few 

races go through a selection process like this one, the selection process allows for a very high finish rate, no deaths, and very few hospital stays. AdventureCorps does an impeccable 

job with every aspect of the race. If you ever get the opportunity to run, crew, or pace this race, take advantageous of it, it will be a once in a lifetime opportunity! 

15

BADWATER REPORT: ED ETTINGHAUSEN (#1594) 

24 hours to countdown. 

When Steve asked me to contribute a report describing my Badwater experience for the MM Newsletter, my first reaction was, “No way, can’t be done, impossible!” Because the only way for you to get a true picture of this bizarre 

mid-July 135 mile romp through Death Valley, is to experience it for yourselves, first hand, through your very own eyes. Ask anyone who’s been there, and they’ll tell you with great enthusiasm that Badwater infects you in ways 

that are indescribable. Words just can’t do justice to the experience that is Badwater - those sights, those sounds, those feelings, those emotions. But since you weren’t able to be there and experience it for yourselves this year, 

maybe we can do the next best thing: take you with us through one small part of the journey. So bring along your imagination and hop on board the Badwater express, and experience a trip covering the final 24 hours leading up to 

the Badwater start line countdown, through the eyes of The Jester. 

In any 100 mile race, let alone Badwater 135, one of the biggest challenges, as it gets closer and closer, is not only the endless amount of training and preparation that goes into just getting to that start line, but the tremendous 

amount of patience required, just waiting for race day to finally arrive. Remember when you were a kid and how Christmas and Summer vacation seemed like they would never get here? For many ultra runners, Badwater is sort of 

the pinnacle of our sport, our Boston Marathon of the ultras, our ultra Olympics, if you will. Now that we’re big kids, it’s kind of like Christmas and Summer vacation all rolled into one. And so it is, in much the same way as we wait 

for our wildest Badwater dreams to become reality. 

Since February, when you were notified that Team Jester was one of the lucky 96 entrants chosen for 2012 – as if your team were going to the Olympics itself - you’ve had one all-consuming singular goal: get to the Badwater start 

line, healthy and strong, whatever it takes. And now, that day is just around the corner. It’s almost time. You’re finally going to the big show. 

On Saturday night every member of Team Jester meets at your house for final preparation for the physical and mental rigors that lay ahead - by eating pizza watching movies. Laughing it up while watching the marathon movie Run, 

Fat Boy, Run (no resemblance to our very own “Fat Boy” Ryan Launder). Tearing up while watching Across the Sun – the documentary of Badwater 1999, in which double amputee from the UK, Chris Moon struggles to finish, and 

your friend and local boy Eric Clifton struggles to win the race. How are you to know that in a mere 12 hours, you’ll see both these guys in person. Chris, returning to attempt his second Badwater finish after a 13 year hiatus, with 

his 13 year old son on his crew, and Eric, crewing for Mike Morton, in his attempt to break the course record. And then you finish the night off by whooping it up while watching the 2011 Badwater race highlights real. The crew 

sleep overnight at your house, wherever an empty bed, or open spot on the floor can be found. 


Sunday morning finds the team bright and cheery and chomping at the bit to get our Badwater trip under way. After a quick breakfast you all pile into the van 

and head out together for the long drive into the middle of Hell itself. If you woke up from a dream and found yourself in a place with names like Stovepipe 

Wells, Devil’s Cornfield, Furnace Creek, Devil’s Golf Course, Death Valley, Devil’s Post Pile and Badwater, where else would you be? And with scorching 

temperatures that can easily top out at over 120 degrees, there's no doubt, you are truly in the very heart of Hell itself. 

If you’re planning a trip through Hell, you might as well take as many companions along for the ride as you can. In the hell that is Badwater you’re allowed six. 

You’ve handpicked these individuals as much for their running abilities as for their positive attitudes, having ran multiple marathons and ultras with every one 

of them, pacing with them for parts of their own ultra journeys. You might be able to run other ultras without a crew or pacers, and maybe even self-supported, 

but try to do that at Badwater and you’re dead meat! 

Each one of the crew has a nick name unique to them, all with special meaning. There’s Brady “Bacon Boy” Wentlandt, John “Vomit Boy” Wog, “Cadillac Steve” 

Hernandez, Ryan “Fat Boy” Launder, Martha “Mrs. Jester” Ettinghausen, “Mamma Shawna” Wentlandt, and the mascot and unofficial crew kid, Colby “mini- 

Jester” Wentlandt. 

When you saddle up to the dirt parking lot of the Furnace Creek Inn for the mandatory check-in, it’s high noon at the OK Corral. About 100 of you arrive from all 

around the world, converging on a tiny smudge on the map that is the lowest point in the Western Hemisphere. But you don’t come alone, like a modern day 

Western, you each arrive with your posse in tow, all dressed to the hilt, in a procession of private limos with dozens of paparazzi cameras flashing as you step 

out of your ride and walk down the red carpet. Close your eyes, take a moment, breath it all in. 

Ok, so your entourage consists of your six crew members, dressed in matching outfits - Running Skirts and bright blue and orange shirts for Team Jester. Your 

private limos are actually a 15 passenger white van without the back seats, and a mini SUV, loaded to the hilt with enough food and drink to supply a small 

army. Each ‘limo’ comes with your name and bib number plastered on all four sides, with big red “Caution Runners” signs affixed to the back. And although 

there isn’t a Badwater red carpet, you do get your pictures taken in front of the famous Badwater banner, as if you were an actual celebrity. And then more 

photo ops with your fellow athletes around the world famous Furnace Creek pool. At this place, on this day, every runner and their team is the star attraction. 

Yeah, it’s a bit heady for the newcomer, and the race is still a whole day away. 

Soon, you’re rubbing elbows with Badwater legends that stand head and shoulders above the rest, like Marshall Ulrich (the most winningest of them all – 

Marshall is the Chuck Norris of Badwater), Dean Karnazes (Ultramarathon Man), Art Webb, Pam Reed, Amy Palmiero-Winters, Chris Moon, Dan Jenson, Eric 

Clifton, Mike Morton and many others. With this crowd, the egos are left at home. They'll tell you that they are standing on the shoulders of those that came 

before them. But there are no free lunches here (well there is literally a free lunch for you and all the crew, Wednesday, at the celebration luncheon). They had 

to earn their spot, just like you did, so everyone is an equal. When it comes to getting from Badwater Basin to Whitney Portal, it’s the very same hard scrabble 

135 mile challenge for every single entrant, no matter how many times they may have done it in the past. 

In this Badwater class reunion of 2012, you’re milling about shaking hands with new friends from all corners of the world, and hugging friends you haven’t seen since Badwater 2011 or your last big race together. And then, you 

finally meet up and compare notes with the real rock “stars” of the event, a few of whom you’ve shared multiple 100 mile races with on many occasions. 

There is but one club that was represented by over 10% of the Badwater field – 10 out of 96 entrants, more by far than any other single club, group or organization in Badwater’s history, and probably more than all other clubs 

combined. Last year there were seven, this year ten, and with the inspiration that Badwater Maniacs bring to their fellow club members, who knows what the future years will bring. With nearly 6,000 members strong and growing 

stronger every day, there is a never ending crop of future Badwater Maniacs just waiting for their chance to prove their meddle and leave their own mark on the annals of “The toughest footrace on the Planet”. 

This Marathon Maniacs have definitely made their presence known at Badwater, and you’re a part of it right along with the likes of “Uncle Mike” Miller, Dave Carver, Maggie Beach, Claude Hicks, Jr., Rob Cowan, Heidi Perry, Brad 

Lombardi, and their Maniac crews. And then there’s those esteemed veterans, four time finisher Tony Portrera, and top 10 finisher, the very first Maniac across the line in 2012, with a sub 30 hour time, Mr. Mustache himself, 

Badwater Badass Terry Sentinella. Whether three stars or ten stars or any stars in between, they’re all Badwater rock stars, and you’re a part of this esteemed group. Look around you with pride. Soak it in. 

Spending time at the Furnace Creek Ranch the day before the race is like being in the Olympic village. Everywhere you go - with the mandatory check-ins and briefings, the impromptu get togethers with friends old and new, lunch, 

dinner, hanging out at the pool, and everywhere you look, you see multitudes of other Badwater runners and teams. People that you’ve never met are coming up to you and saying things like, “I saw you on last year's Badwater 

race highlights video, good luck”. You’re constantly stopping for pictures with your fellow competitors. And after taking pictures with a foreign team that you’re barely able to communicate with, it hits you, these people are not 

your competition. No, they’re your allies. You’re not here to compete against them, but with them. The real competition you’ll meet tomorrow, out on the course – the road, the heat, the wind, the miles, the mountains, the 

elevation, the clock, and of course, yourself. But mostly, the clock. Ever the clock that never stops. Tic toc, tic toc, tic toc . . . 

And before you know it, this whirlwind of a day finally comes to a close. You lay your head down for the last 40 winks you’ll be getting for the next forty hours. Your head is spinning with thoughts of what you’ve already seen 

today, and what you’re about to see tomorrow. You visualize your team crossing the finish line fast and strong. And then you slowly drift off . . . 

No sooner did you close your eyes when you’re jolted awake by the ringing of the hotel phone. You quickly bolt out of bed to answer it, only to realize it’s your early morning wake-up call, which comes in just seconds before your 

cell phone alarm goes off. And shortly after that the hotel radio clock alarm is blasting away. A strange cacophonous chorus of modern day electronic roosters to welcome in the new day. But you don't mind because this is certainly 

one morning you can’t afford to wake up late. You can't wait to take in every moment of this day. With your 10:00 a.m. start, at least you don’t have to be on the line as early as the 6’ers and 8’ers. One last meal with the crew, a 

large breakfast for the road, filled with silliness and jollity, and then your off. 

Driving in to the start line, miles away at Badwater Basin, you get to see everyone on the road from the two earlier starts, already well under way. The first person you spot is but a tiny speck on the road when you first see them, a 

lone ranger way off in the distance with no one else is around. Long before you can make out her face, you know who she is by the unmistakable outline of a tall slender woman with a prosthetic leg coming along strong, running 

with a fluid motion, looking solid and smooth. Cheering Amy on as your crew vehicles head in the opposite direction towards the Furnace Creek and then the Badwater Salt Flats, while she’s heading away from the Furnace Creek 

checkpoint, towards the next checkpoint at Stovepipe Wells, a full marathon distance away. Of course you have no way of knowing that you’ll be exchanging words of encouragement with Amy, as the two of you play leap frog, 

struggling up the last few miles of Whitney, a mere 32 hours from now. 

Keep looking. As you continue on towards the start line you recognize many of the other runners, there’s Marsh, Art, Mags, and Tony. You honk your horn and cheer on each runner as you pass them by, spread out on the highway 

ahead of you as far as the eye can see. Those that you know, you call out to by name. Those that you don’t, the crew is frantically looking up by their bib number so you can shout words of encouragement to them 

16

ED ETTINGHAUSEN BADWATER REPORT (CONT)… 

Can you feel it? Everyone is excited. The energy level in the crew vehicle is palpable and building, and you still have seven miles to get to the start line. There's an empty space on the road, with no more runners, and then you see it 

off in the distance. A whole new cadre of runners, a bit less spread out, with bit faster pace. It’s the 8 o’clockers, heading towards Furnace Creek at a fairly quick pace. Team Jester is definitely getting pumped up now. There’s 

Claude, his trademark single long braid down his back. Here comes Brian Recore, the guy you had the honored privilege of crewing for in 2010, and right on his tail, comin' on strong, is one of the most highly regarded runners in the 

SouthWest ultra scene “Uncle Mike” Miller. 

You slow down just enough to slap hands, without causing a traffic jam to the cars behind you, but the speed of the two different directions is still fast enough to leave a pretty decent stinging sensation to your palm. Strong enough 

to remind you that you're alive, while matching the stinging sensation in your eyes, as you’re temporarily taken back to the experiences of one year ago, sharing 40 plus miles with “Uncle Mike” on last year’s crew, including the 

final four miles to Whitney Portal where all the crew members clasped hands as the first Team Jester crossed the finish line in unison. You're hoping that Team Jester II will be able to share an equally memorable experience at the 

finish line. this trip down memory lane only lasts for a moment, drowned out by the commotion in the van. 

Now you can finally see it, just a couple miles ahead and curving to the right. Everyone on the team breaks out in whoops and shouts of joy as the team van get closer and closer. Around that final turn and then the start line comes 

into view. There it is, in all it's glory. The world famous Badwater start banner across the road. The parking lot crowded with support vehicles for the 32 runners in your wave. The crews running to and fro like busy ants, doing last 

minute prep inside and outside the vehicles, taping down all the magnetic signs and getting the first of hundreds of hydration bottles ready to go, while you check-in with the medical team for the mandatory weigh in. 

Suddently, the booming voice of Race Director Chris Kostman announces over the megaphone, “Everybody to the Badwater sing for a group picture”. For a serious race, there is a whole lot of joking and laughter taking place, as we 

all ham it up for the cameras for pictures with small clumps of people, all over the Badwater Salt Flats boardwalk. Everyone is in a good mood. There’s a buzz of activity all about you and electricity in the air, part of that of course 

being nervous energy. You find a spot behind the sign with your fellow runners, while literally dozens of camera are taking hundreds of shots. 

With less than 15 minutes to the start, you decide it’s prudent to hit the john one last time. The line to the outhouse is long, and you notice guys going behind it. What the heck, you only have to pee, so you graciously give up your 

spot in line to the guys and gals with a little more serious business, and you join a handful of international competitors, taking one last pit stop, minutes before the race. What a sport. 

“Ten minutes to the start!” Time for last minute prep with the team: Sunscreen – check. Ice hat – check. Sunglasses – check. Chapstick – check. Gatorade – check. The team knows that from this moment on, there is one singleminded 

focus - get you to Whitney Portal in under 48 hours, whatever it takes. Every single action today, and tonight, and during the next day again, will be towards seeing that goal completed. For the foreseeable future, 

everything else becomes secondary. 

Final hugs and good wishes from the crew, and a kiss from Mrs. Jester, and then you’re in the start line. Hey look, there’s Dean Karnazes right next to you, does he seem shorter in person? Pam Reed is way off to the right. Mike 

Morton is over there. There’s Badass Terry, right in front of you. This is it, you’re really about to do this. All the preparation you’ve done for the last five months is now coming to fruition. You’re really about to run Badwater. 

You hear Chris’s voice, for almost the last time you’ll hear it before he welcomes you across the finish line, a lifetime away. “Whatever you do, don’t think about the scorching 135 miles in front of you, or the three mountain passes 

you’re about to climb, or the 13,000 feet of elevation gain, as you stand at the lowest point in the whole race. No, don’t think about that as you’re getting ready to run the toughest footrace on the planet. We only made 50 

buckles and you already have 65 people in front of you with a couple of hours head start. Good luck . . .” 

Then you hear the National Anthem playing, every hat comes off, including the international runners, out of respect for their American friends and their host Nation. You're jester hat is off and over your heart, as you bow your 

head and reverently take in each note. You’ve heard this song and been moved by it at a hundred other races. And you never get tired of it, no matter how many times you hear it. As each race goes by, each rendition brings a 

whole new set of memories. But this time, hearing it in the wide open expanse of the Badwater Salt Flats, it’s somehow different. Every note is crisp, and true. The temperature is already well over 100 degrees, yet you get goose 

bumps and chills. Each of you are lost in your own private thoughts of what sacrifices it took to get here. First your own personal sacrifices, and then you think of the sacrifices many other have made on your behalf as well. All the 

members of your crew. Your wife. Sometime tomorrow evening, you will celebrate your 2nd Badwater finish, on the same day that your wife lovingly and patiently waits at the finish line to celebrate your 30th wedding 

anniversary. Sacrafices. 

It's amazing how much the seconds seem to slow down at times. You hang on to each and every note, a part of you anxious for it to end, to get started, and a part of you wishing it would never end, dreading the final note. After 

what seems like an eternity, while at the same time a flash of an eye, you hear the final chord trail off. In the few seconds that follow, no one speaks, no one moves. You’re amongst the ranks of arguably the toughest ultra athletes 

on the planet, and just about every one of you are now wiping at the corners of your eyes. 

“Ten . . . nine . . . eight . . . seven . . . six . . . five . . . four . . . three . . . two . . . one . . .” 

BADWATER REPORT: MICHAEL MILLER (#2338) 

What makes Badwater so special for me is the exact thing I dig most about being a Marathon Maniac – because it's a family. Though admittedly at the Badwater family reunion you have a lot less good looking younger Nieces and 

lot more old crusty wrinkled Uncles who could use a shave. The other thing that reminds me so much of the Maniac family is the amount of inspirational stories among the runners. I truly felt humbled and blessed to be able to 

share the same course with some of these incredible folks. You're there hanging with perhaps some of the most accomplished endurance athletes in our generation, yet you see nothing but a quiet humility, a willingness to share, 

to support, and to do whatever they can to make everyone else's experience in that Valley as enjoyable as they can. I say this a lot but I have to repeat it, friends and family that do not run have often said "you must be an 

adrenaline junkie"! I always tell them "No, I'm an Inspiration Junkie" and like hanging with our crazy bunch of Maniacs, the Badwater gang of runners, crews, supporters, and the team who puts on the event is like hitting the 

Inspiration Motherlode. 

I think I could probably ramble forever about all the incredible experiences I had in those few days in the desert, but for anyone thinking about running it someday, or crewing (an equally amazing experience only no Buckle but you 

do get to draft the runner going up Townes :)) let me share a few of my memories that will last a lifetime... 

Having friends and family that care enough about me to spend 5 days in the desert, getting little sleep, being hot all the time, and still kind enough 

to take a nasty sweaty rag from my hand, replace it with a clean one, as they run alongside me spritzing water and telling me how awesome I am 

doing. Standing under the AdventureCORPS banner and listening to the National Anthem. Being in a picture at the Badwater start with three 

beautiful members of my crew all dressed in leopard run skirts. Coming along side Marshall Ulrich during the race and saying "thanks for sharing 

your Valley with me today". Having a huge dust devil dance right in front of me across the street and seeing it grow in the dunes. Watching race 

winner Mike Morton pass me like I was standing still soon after Stovepipe (by the way he started 2 hours after!). Looking across the street and 

being totally surprised by friends holding a sign just for me. Being able to say ‘go get that thing’ to Amy Palmeiro-Winters as we came alongside 

her. Hearing about and being humbled by all the support I was getting from friends and family on the social networks. Cresting Townes Pass 

against the winds with the help of my 'brother from another mother' and fellow Maniac Mark Hellenthal. A bowl of the best soup ever at 

Panamint Springs. Running with my beautiful Redhead in the middle of the night under the most amazing sky and Milky Way. The feeling of 

jumping over the 100 mile marker written on the road after 21 1/2 hours of running and pushing forward. Watching as the sun arose again 

revealing the majesty of the Sierra Nevada's in front of me. A Popsicle in Lone Pine before heading up the Portal. Watching race winner Sumi 

Inagaki struggling with all she had going up the last few miles of the Portal Road climb. Thinking of, and drawing on the energy of all those friends 

who no longer can run, or are no longer with us, and using that to push up those final 4 steep miles. All of us crossing that finish line together – 

truly, truly a team event. A big kiss for the Redheaded Maniac. Holding old man tears as I hugged my friends Ken and Steph thinking how they 

scrambled all day and night doing everything they could and then some to help me get there. Witnessing perhaps one of the greatest endurance 

performances ever as I got to see Art Webb bust the tape at The Portal in some 33 hours (the man is 70 years young)!! Seeing the look of Joy on 

Pam Reed's face as she finished. Watching my friend, fellow Maniac, and in my humble opinion one of the most inspirational folks out there (and 

it has little to do with his running) Ed Ettinghausen cross the finish line with his team Jester and then give his wife of 30 years an anniversary hug 

that looked like he may not let go for the next 30 years. Seeing the Maniac with the coolest stash' out there go sub 30. Seeing the finish line 

picture of Maniac Claude Hicks with his mother's picture right there with him. Listing to the incredible Chris Moon share his race experience at the 

Pizza Party. Watching all the hugs and laughter among the Race support teams, the crews, and the runners at the after party. Setting a new PR 

for shower length (sorry Mother Nature). And…, and…, and… 

So when someone asks me why we run? I’m just gonna’ say “This is why….” 


17

BADWATER REPORT: HEIDI PERRY (#1095) 

Badwater Ultramarathon: 135 miles through Death Valley: an epic event to train for, to prepare for and to run. How to write a race report in 1000 words or less? Are you 

ready? 

Read the Badwater application for the 2011 race; realize you are not qualified as the standards have increased to three 100 mile races completed; make a plan to complete 

two more 100 milers; run Lumberjack 100 in April of 2011 and suffer through a giant mud fest but laugh and know you need to finish anyway; run Javelina Jundred in 

November of 2011; run a great 60 miles in about 12 hours but have your hip seize up so hike the final 40 miles and get it done all the while chanting in your head that this is 

for Badwater; try something really nutty like the Arrowhead 135 in northern Minnesota in January of 2012 but stop after mile 72 because the pain is so great and you want 

to be able to train for Badwater should you get accepted to run. 

Apply to Badwater and wait on pins and needles; get the e-mail and scream in your daughter’s ear and start making so many to-do lists that your friend who is OCD would 

be impressed; train on roads, train on trails, train on your own more miles than you can count, enter races but run too hard, but get in some solid 100 mile efforts; start 

tanning, start heat training; remember to tell your family you love them and appreciate the sacrifices they make for you, make sacrifices in your training for your family; 

borrow what you can, buy so much equipment that you are certain the economy will improve based on your spending alone; find 6 people who are willing to spend money 

and vacation time helping you cross Death Valley because something called you there more than 20 years ago. 

Arrive at Furnace Creek in Death Valley; scream and cry because you are finally there; relish every moment and every experience because you have worked so hard to get 

here and dreamed about this for so long. 

The gun goes off and so do you although very slowly and everyone in the 8 a.m. 

wave seems to be ahead of you but try not to worry you just want a 40 hour finish 

but won’t complain if you finish faster than that; start ice bandannas early on even 

though it is a cool year (113 degrees at the highest); eat every 20 minutes, drink as 

much as you want; remember that you are HERE doing THIS and it is the best thing 

ever; listen to your crew and do what they say because they want this finish as 

much as you do and you told them what to do for you; don’t sit, keep moving 

because from the time the gun went off you have been able to smell the barn and 

are on your way to the finish; meet up with Marshall Ulrich and run with him and 

swap stories; stop to change your socks and shoes at mile 42 but get on the road 

again; swim through the 40 mph headwind going up the 17 mile climb that is 

Towne’s Pass but laugh because isn’t it great to just be here with your friends?; get 

passed by Pam Reed; enjoy the sun setting but try to keep your eyes open because 

man are you sleepy? And all you want to do is have some spunk; enjoy the gravity 

assisted running; try to stay awake for the climb up Panamint; sun comes up; 

there’s the Darwin checkpoint; do a little dance and scream because yes YOU are 

here now; see Mt. Whitney and it is closer than it has ever been; don’t take your 

eyes off of it; just run to there, or walk; stop too frequently but now I think I have a 

blister, get two toes taken care of by your crew; now to run; pass the 100 mile mark 

in around 26 hours; not too shabby but that is Mt. Whitney right there; play every 

mind game you can to get yourself to just keep running because running is faster 

than walking, run to that bush, run to that car; keep eating because you are a 


machine and those calories will get you there, there is Lone Pine just ahead and then you can start the 

climb up the Portal Road; run the final 2 miles to the Dow Villa check point, sit, eat, get up and go 

because this is the end to that car; keep eating because you are a machine and those calories will get 

you there, there is Lone Pine just ahead and then you can start the climb up the Portal Road; run the 

final 2 miles to the Dow Villa check point, sit, eat, get up and go because this is the end and you are 

right here right now and the sooner you get there the sooner you get that buckle and you want that 

finish line so badly it makes you laugh; speaking of laugh, remember to smile because you are living 

the dream and there is no place better than this right now and you just ran through Death Valley; 

hurry up crew so we can cross the line together, cross it in 35:47 (5th place woman), jump up and 

down with your crew, hugs all around, sing “you gotta fight, for your right to party!” because you all 

are so happy and you don’t know what else to do but now your checks hurt from being so happy, get 

your buckle, get the finish line pictures, drive down to the hotel and cheer on the runners going up and 

secretly wish you could be out there with them, but right now you are hungry and demanding food so 

you get some then you sleep, or try to but that is not really where the race ends. The Badwater 

Ultramarathon was really awesome. 

If you’ve never run it or crewed, then it is hard to explain, but The Badwater Ultramarathon is a really 

special event to be a part of. I don’t know if it is the “hardest footrace on the planet” but the work to 

get there and to get a smooth, successful finish is certainly not for the faint of heart. Plus having an 

entire team to work with is unlike anything else. Team High Voltage worked flawlessly to get us all to 

the finish line: Sean Sexton, Nick Harvey, John Pearch, Kris Ryding, Cyndie Merten and Linda Huyck 

18

Lisa Cao 

Allie Levy and 

Jackie Galino 


Betsy 

Rogers 

Cynthia Lao 

Brian Pendleton 

Kathy 

Kass 

Maine-iac 

Blaine 

Moore 

19

Paul Arroyo 

Matt Hagen 


David Holmen 

Cynthia Lao 

Great Cranberry Island 50k (7/21): Paul "Bronx Boy" Arroyo, Michael 

Brokaw, Mike Brooks, Lisa Cao, Jacqueline "Choisauce" Choi, Douglas 

Dahlberg, Susan DeRoberts, LizNoel Duncan, Jean "Mama Jean" Evansmore, 

Alanna Garrison-Kast, "MAINE-iac", Jackie Gulino, Matt "Pooky" Hagen, Amy 

Hediger, David Holmen, Kathy Kass, John Kinnicutt, Steve Laine, Allie 

Lasssoe, Steven "Thunder" Lee, John Kent Leighton, Allie Levy, Amanda 

Lewis, Chuck Mader, Blaine Moore, Sommer Mueller, Daiki Nakajima, Dave 

Nevitt, The Programmer, Missy Peters, Pascal Radley, Michael Roberts, 

EatDrinkRunWoman, Derek Rogers, Liz Santos, David Shannon, Michelle 

"Mississippi" Sipe, Susan Snead, Ben Tam, Jamie Theriault, Ty Thurlow, 

Becky Tsai, Kaia Turner, Dana "Puddlz" Wentzel, Jessica Willis, Heather 

Zeigler 

Steven Lee 

Bettie Wailes 

Douglas 

Dahlberg 

Pascal Radley 

Allie Lassoe 

Missy 

Peters 

20

Douglas Dahlberg 

Jacqueline Choi 

HALF- M AR ATHON C R AZY 

Tired of running marathons and ultras (HA!!)? Need to 

back down on that weekly mileage and concentrate on 

getting faster? Then join the Half Fanatics 

(halffanatics.com). There are currently over 2700 

members in the Fanatic Asylum, and I’m sure you’ll 

recognize a few names in the group. So jump on the 

bandwagon now, get your qualifying races in and join 

this new, zany group! 

www.halffanatics.com 


Suan DeRoberts, Missy Peters, 

John Kent Leighton 

Charles 

Mader 

Marathon 

Maniacs 

running half 

marathons… 

YES, it’s true! 

Elaine Green 

Daiki 

Nakajima 

Blaine Moore 

RD Gary 

Allen 

Check this out! 

Half Fanatics at the Rock N Roll Chicago Half Marathon 

21

Jon, Marilyn, Rick and Monte 

Wild Thing Summer Fling (7/22): 

Monica Bloom, David England, Jen 

Eff, Jim Fox, Susan Glesne, Terri 

"Maverick" Gray, Rick "Roadkill A.S." 

Haase, Jill Hudson, Melinda Irvine, 

Jon "Coconutboy" Mahoney, Tracy 

Marshall, Gary Otheim, Monte 

Pascual, Kendel Prescott, Walt 

Prescott, Scott Sebelsky, Julie " 

Seeker" Stark, Shana "Rustynail" 

Tolean, Linda Walter 


Linda, Jill and Susan 

Ryan McKnight 

The Rules of the 

Wild Thing 

From Facebook to Twitter, the Maniacs have a presence in the world of social 

networking. Whatever social network your prefer I’m sure the Maniacs are there, 

so check them out! 

Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/group.php?gid=8904689204 

LinkedIn: http://www.linkedin.com/e/vgh/1843119/ 

MySpace: http://www.myspace.com/marathonmaniacs 

Dailymile: http://www.dailymile.com/groups/1403-marathon-maniacs 

RunningAhead: http://www.runningahead.com/groups/MMs 

Linda Walter 

Gary Otheim 

22

Michelle Day 

Chris 

Warren 


Charli Long 

Carlos Murillo 

Lori Schwartz 

MARATHON 

Angela Schut 

Steven Lee 

Diana Kitching 

Jody Reed AnnMaree Feuss 

Wilmer Cerrato 

Marie Zornes 

23

Jill 

Bidwell 

Martha 

Corazzini 

Pascal Radley 

Abbi Florence 

and Maniac 

Bart Yasso 


Joe Taricani and Dave Mari 

Tony 

Nguyen 

Someone trying to take out the 

Biking Viking! 

Peter 

Mingwah 

Tracy 

Crane 

San Francisco Marathon (7/29): Hector Aleman, Estelle "MadPup" Atney, Pureza 

Bacor, David Bartholomew, Tomer Benyair, Jill Bidwell, Quicksilver Runner, Ray 

O' Sunshine, Monika Carlson, Dye1Lon, Pony Express, Bryan Cichon, Charles 

Clutter, Rick Cooney, Martha "Ginger26.2" Corazzini, Tracy "Trixie" Crane, 

Haywood Crowder, Cody Dangel, Diana Daves, Alexis Davidson, Craig "C-DOG" 

Davidson, Jill Davis, Michelle Day, 1.5 million mile runner 1 mile 1 victim, Jessica 

Deree, David Dwyer, Teresa Dyreng, Seth Elsheimer, Dexter Emoto, Richard 

Ervais, Steve Felson, AnnMaree Feuss, Patrick Finney, Jim "Superdawg" Fisher, 

Abbi (Abbi-Normal) Florence, Anders "Biking Viking" Forselius, Michael Fry, Noel 

"Knees Hurt" Garibay, Lil Mango, Michael Hanson, Miyuki Hasegawa, Steven 

Heisler, Jennifer Hienton, Amy Holt, DEO, Eric Jensen, Chris Jones, Libby Jones, 

D2R2 - "Da Do Run" Ron Kalich, David Keck, Tracy Kellam, William Kenneweg, 

Jaehee Kim, Rick King, Hideki "Kino" Kinoshita, Joseph Kolinsky, Terry "Koz" 

Koslofsky, Mike Kreaden, Francis Kwok, Michelle Ladcani, Vickie Lau, John 'Oksie' 

Lazaro, Steven "Thunder" Lee, Trey Lominack., Charli Long, Violeta Lopez, 

Kenichiro Maemura, Laird Malamed, Michel Maokhampio, Dave Mari, Ethan 

Matyas, Diane Adele, Little Leslie, Pete "Island Wolf" Mingwah, Jessica "Wabbitz" 

Montoya, Angela Morris, Kevin Morris, Maggie Mount, Micah Nash, Sonja 

Normann, Nancy Oh "Nano", Karen Osborn, Delia Park, Don "Wait For Me!" 

Pemberton, tony (tp!) phillippi, Kathy "Rad Queen" Pryor, Pascal Radley, Jody 

"wooden shoes" Reed, George Rehmet, Irish Joe Reilly, Cade Remsburg, Keith 

Reyes, Larry Rich, Silver Rivas, John Rodgers, Nadia Ruiz, Keith Schlottman, Bob 

Schluben, Jim "Splinter" Schroeder, Dan Schultz, Angela Schut, Lori Schwartz, 

Mike Schwartz, Myron Sidloski, Lu-E "-(O_O)-" Soriano, Kirk Stafford, Mark 

Stodghill, Patricia Strock, Chuck Struckness, Ward "Winded Wonder" Sullivan, 

Gary Tam, Joseph "The Marathon Show" Taricani, Jon "Pugsly" Turner, Deanna 

Vignjevic, Rebecca "Bad Ass" Walker, CJ **Hollywood** Warren, Lauren Wilke, 

Steve Wisner, ML Wolbrink, Alice X, Ely Yaron, Marie "Mimi" Zornes 

24

Vincent Ma 

Robert Sokol 

Ed 

Masuoka 

Karen Faber 


Wayne Sherman 

Cassie Beck 

Larry Macon 

Each month there will be a “Maniac poll”. This poll will be posted online. Please 

take a few moments to answer this poll. I will post the results in the next 

newsletter. 

This month’s question: What do you do for running during the hot summer months? 

Please vote online between now and September 7: http://tinyurl.com/MMpollSep2012 

Rosaryville Trail Run (7/22): Cassie 

Beck, Raj(RunningYogi), Karen Faber, 

Lara Gonzalez, Martin Gould, John 

Hord, Ed Masuoka, Liz McMichael, 

Eve Mills, Jennifer "Jenster" Ralston, 

Wayne "The Manimal" Sherman, 

Robert Sokol 

Last month’s question: Does on course 

entertainment matter to you? 

Wayne gets his 

pony! 

When it comes to running marathons, most 

Maniacs don’t care about course entertainment. 

Thanks for voting! 

25

The following is a statistical update on the growth of the Marathon Maniacs. It may not mean much to you, but I find it very interesting. 

Monthly Growth 

Month ► Jan Feb Mar Apr May Jun Jul Aug Sep Oct Nov Dec Yearly 

Averages ► 42.0 39.3 42.5 36.0 64.7 50.4 33.3 19.8 23.4 58.7 71.2 73.7 537.2 

2011 ► 95 101 113 94 209 128 77 50 51 171 218 174 1481 

2012 ► 154 95 126 132 160 147 101 - - - - - 915 


Cyndie Merten, Yolanda 

Holder and Evelyn Smith 

Larry Macon and Yolanda Holder Anders Forselius 

Deseret News Marathon 

(7/24): John Bozung, Jacob 

Case, Mark Casey, Jonathan 

Crampton, Hailey Dennis, 

Susan Dennis, Seth 

Elsheimer, Anders "Biking 

Viking" Forselius, Earl 

Fulcher, Brigitt Hartin, Al " 

on to sub 4/50 states 

McGowan, Kurt "The Kidd" 

Neilan, Blaine Phillips, Irish 

Joe Reilly, Lindsey Simpson, 

Evelyn Smith 

New Maniacs in July 2012 101 

New Maniacs in 2012 915 

Total Maniacs 5751 

Evelyn 

Smith 

Susan and Hailey Dennis 

State MM Pct% 

Washington 921 16.0% 

California 547 9.5% 

Texas 418 7.3% 

Illinois 254 4.4% 

Florida 222 3.9% 

New York 188 3.3% 

Oklahoma 174 3.0% 

Virginia 173 3.0% 

Oregon 167 2.9% 

Georgia 133 2.3% 

Ohio 133 2.3% 

26

If you reached a higher Maniac level and want the recognition in the Newsletter Please fill out this form: http://tinyurl.com/MMupgrade 

�Titanium (10 star) Maniac: Chad Spilman, Kane Baker 

� Platinum (8 star) Maniac: Adam Irvin, JC Santa Teresa, Brian Wright, Pete Mingwah 

� Palladium (7 star) Maniac: Chris Battaglia, Peter Mingoa, Eddie Vega 

� Osmium (6 star) Maniac: Kristin Allen, Danielle Hastings, Shawna Wentlandt, Brady Wentlandt, 

Greg Yates 

�Ruthenium (5 star) Maniac: Scott Richardson, Mark Parrotte, Laura Milak, William Milak 

�Iridium (4 star) Maniac: Lacey Martinosky, Greg Glockner, Kelli Oyewole, Abbi Florence, Mary Coffelt, 

� Gold (3 star) Maniac: Laird Malamed, Kevin Steinberg 


Laura Schneider, Sarah Parrish, Rhonda Noonan, Fay Westenhofer, Catherine Yu, Bob Hoaglin, Katherine Murphy 

�Silver (2 star) Maniac: Kirk Stafford, Marcia Godwin, Michelle Ladcani, Kathy Lein, Tracia Strock 

200 Marathons: Steve Hughes, David Johnson 

Yolanda Holder 

Tracy 

Crane 

Chris Jones 

Bryan Cichon 

Cassandra Cisneros 

New Titanium Maniacs!! 

Chad Spilman 

Abbi Florence and Catherine Yu 

Tracy's Fat Ass Marathon 

Kane Baker 

27

Marathon/Ultra Calendar between August 18-September 11 

Saturday, August 18 

Beast of Burden Summer 24h/100m (NY) 

First Call Summer 50k/26.2 (WA) 

Green River Run with the Horses Marathon (WY) 

Helsinki City Marathon (FIN) 

I Shall Return 50k (PHL) 

Iron Legs 50m (AB) 

Iroquoia Trail Test (ON) 

Leadville Trail 100 Run (CO) 

Marquette Trail 50m/50k (MI) 

Moosalamoo 36m (VT) 

Old Farts Marathon (MI) 

Park City Marathon (UT) 

Reykjavik Marathon (ISL) 

River Valley Marathon (WA) 

Run-de-Vous 100m/100k/50m/50k (CA) 

Running with the Bears (CA) 

Skyline Mountain Marathon (UT) 

Waldo 100k (OR) 

Sunday, August 19 

Big Wildlife Runs (AK) 

Drake Well Marathon (PA) 

Edmonton Marathon (AB) 

Ironman Mont-Tremblant (QC) 

Kagay-An Marathon (PHL) 

Leading Ladies Marathon (SD) 

Pikes Peak Marathon (CO) 

Rocket Racing Summer Showdown 50k/26.2 (CA) 

Run on the Sly (CA) 

Turkey Swamp 50k (NJ) 

Friday, August 24 

Cheat Mountain Moonshine Madness (WV) 

Self-Transcendence Marathon (NY) 

Baker Trail UltraChallenge 50m (PA) 

Bulldog 50k (CA) 

CAR Blaze the Beach Marathon (CA) 

Cascade Crest 100 Mile Endurance Run (WA) 

ITR Skirt and Dirt Trail Run (CA) 

Lean Horse 100m/50m/50k (SD) 

Mesa Falls Marathon (ID) 

Moose Mountain Trail Race (AB) 

North Country Run 50m/26.2 (MI) 

NWTR Redmond Watershed Preserve Summer 

Marathon (WA) 

Silverton Alpine 50k/26.2 (CO) 

Wausau Marathon (WI) 

Grant-Pierce Indoor Marathon Cascade Falls FA in Jackson 


Sunday, August 26 

Aspen Backcountry Marathon (CO) 

Bean There Ran That Yarmouth Marathon (NS) 

CAR Run Irvine Marathon (CA) 

Fort Magsaysay to Dingalan 60k (PHL) 

Ironman Canada (BC) 

Ironman Louisville (KY) 

MI Titanium (MI) 

Parker's Marathon (WV) 

Quebec City Marathon (QC) 

Run the Rock Marathon (BC) 

Santa Rosa Marathon (CA) 

Songkhla International Glorify Marathon (THA) 

Friday, August 31 

Calico Once in a Blue Moon 12h/6h (NV) 

Saturday, September 1 

Badgerland 24h/12h/6h (WI) 

Canadian Run (ON) 

CAR Blaze the Path Marathon (CA) 

CTR Coyote Ridge 50k/26.2 (CA) 

Grand Teton 50m/50k/26.2 (WY) 

HURT Tantulus Triple Trek (HI) 

I Ran Marathons Triple Crown Challenge Day One (TX) 

Iron Mountain Trail Run 50/30m (VA) 

Marquette Marathon (MI) 

Merrill's Mile 24h/12h (GA) 

Pocatello Marathon (ID) 

Tejas Trails Captn Karl Reveille Ranch 60k (TX) 

Women Rock Minnesota Marathon (MN) 

Sunday, September 2 

CAR Run the Marina Marathon (CA) 

Flatlanders 12h/6h (MO) 

I Ran Marathons Triple Crown Challenge Day Two (TX) 

Kauai Marathon (HI) 

Labor Pain 12h (PA) 

Logan View Raider Run (NE) 

Minocqua No Frills Marathon (WI) 

Norris Dam Hard Trail Race (TN) 

Roots Rock 50k (WA) 

Sunriver Marathon for a Cause (OR) 

Tupelo Marathon (MS) 

Monday, September 3 

American Discovery Trail Marathon (CO) 

CAR Labor Day Marathon (CA) 

Heart of America Marathon (MO) 

I Ran Marathons Triple Crown Challenge Day Three (TX) 

LC Valley Marathon (WA) 

Turtle Marathon (NM) 

Friday, September 7 

Lost Soul 100m/100k/50k (AB) 

Run Woodstock 100m/100k (MI) 

Superior Fall Trail Race (MN) 

Wasatch Front 100m (UT) 

Xodus Trail Run - Charuvit Forest 50k (ISR) 

Saturday, September 8 

American Heroes Run 9h11m/26.2 (CO) 

Endure the Bear (CA) 

Evergreen Dash Point Trail Run (WA) 

First National Bank of Wakefield Marathon (MI) 

Hawk 100m/50m/26.2 (KS) 

Jungfrau Marathon Day One (CHE) 

Lake Chelan Shore to Shore Marathon (WA) 

Lapham Peak Trail Marathon (WI) 

Little Grand Canyon Marathon (UT) 

Lost Soul 50k Day Two (AB) 

Marathon du Medoc (FRA) 

McKenzie River Trail Run 50m/50k (OR) 

Mid Mountain Marathon (UT) 

Mount Robson Marathon (BC) 

Odyssey Trail Running Rampage 40m/26.2 (VA) 

Plain 100 (WA) 

Run Woodstock 50m/50k/26.2 (MI) 

Salmon Marathon (ID) 

Superior Fall Trail Races 50m/26.2 (MN) 

Susquehanna Super Hike and Ultra Trail Run 

28.4m (PA) 

Sunday, September 9 

Bohol Marathon (PHL) 

Bozeman Marathon (MT) 

Cape Breton Fiddlers Run (NS) 

Ironman Wisconsin (WI) 

ITR K2 Summit Trail Run (CA) 

Jungfrau Marathon Day Two (CHE) 

Lehigh Valley Health Network Marathon for Via (PA) 

Moscow International Peace Marathon (RUS) 

Queen City Marathon (SK) 

River Jungle Marathon (MYS) 

Sioux Falls Marathon (SD) 

Skagit Flats Marathon (WA) 

Treherne Marathon (MB) 

Tuesday, September 11 

Patriots Run 9h11 (KS) 

Foot Traffic Flat Marathon 

28

Mary Moran (#5651) 

Tom Stanfill (#5652) 

Howard Fan (#5653) 

Bob Schaefer (#5654) 

Josh Mitzen (#5655) 

Heather Ramsdell (#5656) 

Paul Morrison (#5657) 

Sheri Steidl (#5658) 

Brian King (#5659) 

Stephanie Cowen (#5660) 

Thanh Nguyen (#5661) 

Cheryl Morris (#5662) 

Willow Ryan (#5663) 

Angelika Steinberg (#5664) 

Angela Pawlak (#5665) 

George Neville (#5666) 

Claude Kansaku (#5667) 

Vins Fong (#5668) 

John Longan (#5669) 

Raul Santana Romero (#5670) 

Chelsi Harrell (#5671) 

Tom Stanfill (#5652) 

Jules Fernandez 

(#5742) 


Alfred Amos (#5672) 

Ashley Wright (#5673) 

Leslie Fukumoto (#5674) 

Helen McMullin (#5675) 

Maryanne Tomich (#5676) 

Rebecca Adolf (#5677) 

Mary Beth Moenssen (#5678) 

Kathy Reed (#5679) 

Michael Pacheco (#5680) 

Keith Gardner (#5681) 

Brenda Murphy (#5682) 

Sue O'Brien (#5683) 

Andrew O'Brien (#5684) 

Scott Krizek (#5685) 

Melissa (#5686) 

Brandon Nobach (#5687) 

Jeff Kobinsky (#5688) 

Emily Jones (#5689) 

Terry Jones (#5690) 

Michael Taggerty (#5691) 

Martha McClellan (#5692) 

Rich Bailey (#5693) 

Katie McGowan (#5694) 

Daniel Cheah (#5695) 

Catherine Wildermuth (#5696) 

Stephanie Puckett (#5697) 

Steven Heisler (#5698) 

Gary Jones (#5702) 

Howard 

Fan 

(#5653) 

Wilmer Cerrato (#5721) 

Daniel Otto (#5699) 

Jorge Ruiz (#5700) 

Jennifer D Warren (#5701) 

Gary "The Snail" Jones (#5702) 

Corrina Hawkins (#5703) 

Mr. Pat (#5704) 

Tyler Standage (#5705) 

Josam Mulinyawe (#5706) 

Michael Ellen (#5707) 

Chris Goodreau (#5708) 

Lorenzo Poletto (#5709) 

Rick Ruhland (#5710) 

Richard Brija (#5711) 

Mike Diener (#5712) 

Robin Davis (#5713) 

Cindy Honebein (#5714) 

Doug Honebein (#5715) 

Ken O'Neill (#5716) 

Will Gerber (#5717) 

Robert Pritchard (#5718) 

Rich Ehrlich (#5719) 

Tim Baker (#5720) 

Wilmer Cerrato (#5721) 

Sue Parrotte (#5722) 

Justin Vanhoy (#5723) 

Marsha Xiong (#5724) 

Owen Lillywhite (#5725) 

Angelika Steinberg (#5664) 

Leslie 

Fukumoto 

(#5674) 

Will 

Gerber 

(#5717) 

Dave "Barndog" Barnhart (#5726) 

Jason Moran (#5727) 

Holly Rosende (#5728) 

Susan Hayes (#5729) 

Eric White (#5730) 

Kiah Johnson Mounsey (#5731) 

Brian Maher (#5732) 

Lori Gromaski (#5733) 

Deborah Rubel (#5734) 

Luis Caballero (#5735) 

Rod Vahle (#5736) 

Jane Lanford (#5737) 

Mike Johnson (#5738) 

Bethany Langlais (#5739) 

James Tuscany (#5740) 

Patrick Ciminera (#5741) 

Jules Fernandez (#5742) 

Nina Reich (#5743) 

Phil Smith (#5744) 

Brian Mann (#5745) 

Amy Driver (#5746) 

Sophia Shi (#5747) 

Lisa Nasr (#5748) 

Lucy Cheng (#5749) 

Larissa Uchiyama (#5750) 

Chung Siedlecki (#5751) 

Willow 

Ryan 

(#5663) 

Thanh 

Nguyen 

(#5661) 

Sue O'Brien 

(#5683), 

Andrew O'Brien 

(#5684) 

29

Jessica Deree 

Jonathan Yung and Steve Walters 

Cathy Fowler 

Congrats Steve Hughes on number 200! 

Keep the pictures coming and keep on running and having fun! 


Greg 

Glennon 

Lara Michelle 

Larry Macon 

David Appleby 

F R O M T H E E D I T O R … 

The Maniacs 

is still a 

“cat” club! 

Yoshiko Jo and 

Jacqueline Choi 

Carol Earles 

August is a hard month for me with the newsletter. It’s important now more then every for you 

guys to take pictures and send them to me (26freak@gmail.com I was thinking that July might be 

a hard month to put together the newsletter, but as it turns out so many of you did a wonderful 

job from Missoula to San Francisco, from Badwater to GCI Ultra. What a wonderful month! 

Thank you everyone and be sure to stay cool and safe this summer as we get ready for the busy 

Fall schedule! 

- Steve “Marathon Freak” Walters MM#338 

30

Jeff “Boneman” Bollman (#1058) 

Some great new races have been added, even our first 2013 race! Take a peek at the new discounts that 

have a * in front of the race name. And don’t forget about the Maniac discounts at Running Skirts 

www.runningskirts.com and The Running Warehouse www.runningwarehouse.com for all your non-Maniac 

branded apparel and shoe needs and at TRY Chips www.trychips.com for your healthy snacking needs. 

• Leading Ladies’ Marathon (SD) 8/19/12: www.leadingladiesmarathon.com 

• Moose’s Tooth Marathon (AK) 8/19/12: www.bigwildliferuns.org 

• Pocatello Marathon (ID) 9/1/12: www.pocatellomarathon.com 

• Sunriver Marathon for a Cause (OR) 9/2/12: www.sunrivermarathon.com 

• Lake Chelan Shore to Shore Marathon (WA) 9/8/12: www.lakechelanmarathon.com 

• Skagit Flats Marathon (WA) 9/9/12: www.skagitrunners.org/skagitflats.shtml 

• Top of Utah Marathon 9/15/12: www.topofutahmarathon.com 

• Fox Cities Marathon (WI) 9/23/12: www.foxcitiesmarathon.org 

• Omaha Marathon (NE) 9/23/12: http://omahamarathon.com 

• The Panhandle Marathon (TX) 9/23/12: www.panhandlemarathon.com 

• New Hampshire Marathon 9/29/12: www.nhmarathon.com 

• Tyler Rose Marathon (TX) 10/7/12: www.tylermarathon.com 

• Grand Rapids Marathon (MI) 10/12/12: http://grandrapidsmarathon.com 

• *Hagg Lake Hybrid Marathon (OR) 10/13/12: www.hagghybrid.com 

• ING Hartford Marathon (CT) 10/13/12: www.hartfordmarathon.com 

• Amica Marathon (RI) 10/14/12: www.amicamarathon.com 

• Mount Deseret Island Marathon (ME) 10/14/12: www.mdimarathon.org 

• Poulsbo Marathon (WA) 10/14/12: www.poulsbomarathon.com 

• Toronto Waterfront Marathon 10/14/12: www.torontowaterfrontmarathon.com 

Elaine Green 

• Indianapolis Marathon 10/20/12: www.indianapolismarathon.com 

• Kansas City Marathon 10/20/12: www.waddellandreedkansascitymarathon.org 

• Des Moines Marathon 10/21/12: www.desmoinesmarathon.com 

• Indianapolis Monumental Marathon 11/3/12: http://monumentalmarathon.com 

• Raleigh City of Oaks Marathon (NC) 11/4/12: www.cityofoaksmarathon.com 

• Fort Worth Marathon 11/11/12: http://fortworthmarathon.org 

• Malibu International Marathon 11/11/12: www.malibuintmarathon.com 

• Norfolk Freedom Marathon (VA) 11/11/12: www.freedommarathon.org 

• *Space Coast Marathon (FL) 11/25/12: www.spacecoastmarathon.com 

• Fortitude for First Descents (DE) 12/1/12: http://fortitude4fd.com/ 

• New Years Double (TX) 12/31/12 & 1/1/13: www.newyearsdouble.com 

• Mississippi Blues Marathon (MS) 1/5/13: www.msbluesmarathon.com 

• Louisiana Marathon 1/20/13: http://thelouisianamarathon.com 

• *Melbourne Music Marathon (FL) 2/3/13: www.themelbournemarathon.com 

• Tallahassee Marathon 2/3/13: www.tallahasseemarathon.com 

• IMS Arizona Marathon 2/17/13: http://thearizonamarathon.com 

• *Columbia SC Marathon 3/9/13: http://columbiascmarathon.com 

• *Carmel Marathon (IN) 4/20/13: www.carmelmarathon.com 

• Oz Marathon (KS) 4/20/13: www.olathe.org/sports/Marathon 

• Tacoma City Marathon (MANIAC 10 Year CELEBRATION!) 5/5/13: www.tacomacitymarathon.com 

• Renegade Race Series (CA) Multiple Dates/Half Marathons or less: www.renegaderaceseries.com 

Details on how to obtain the discount/perk are in the Discount section of the Bulletin Board on the Maniac web site. I post 

new ones on the Bulletin Board as the details are finalized, so keep an eye out. If you have any questions, shoot me an email 

at: jeff@marathonmaniacs.com 

PLEASE RENEW YOUR ANNUAL MANIAC DUES (ON YOUR MANIAC BIRTHDAY) 

YOUR DUES HELP MAINTAIN THE CLUB AND KEEP THE COVETED MANIAC GEAR IN STOCK!! 

A REMINDER IS SENT WITH THE MONTHLY E-FLASH 

AND SOME OF YOU ARE OVERDUE!! 


31

R H E T O R I C A L R E V E L A T I O N S A N D W ( R I T E S ) … 

F R O M T H E R A M B U N C T I O U S R E V 

Hiya Prez!!! 

Oh man am I excited…got a bunch of things to tell you. But first, the setting. (Cue the trumpets): 

DAAAH, 

DAAAAAAH, 

DA da, da, da, dah, 

Da, Da, deDaaaa, da da DA da-de-da de Dahhhh, 

DAAAH, DAAAAAAH, DA da, da, da, dah, 

Da, Da, deDaaaa, dede dah dah, dah de-de da da Dahhhh. 

(MAXO PRESTO ALLEGRO!:) 

DAHdada DAHdada DOTTLEaa 

DAHdada DAHDAH daaaa; 

DAHdada DAHdada DOTTLEaa 

DAHdada DAHDAH daaaa; 

DOT Dottleaa DAAAAAAAAAA….daaaaa….deDAAAAAAA! 

(cue the timpani!!!) BOOM boom BOOM boom BOOM boom BOOM boom BOOM boom... 

(now the violins!!!) 

mmm Mmm Mmm hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm, 

mmm Mmm Mmm Hmm huhuh Huh huh hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm, 

mmm Mmm Mm hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm, 

mmm Mmm Mmm Hmm huhhuh huh huh HMMMMMMMMMMMM!!!!! 

I’m TELLING you Prez, we Maniacs are kinda-sorta like the Olympians! No really! Actually, Prez, they are sort of like US! Let me explain. 

This swimmer, see, is getting a lot of attention for having two swims in one night, with only a twenty-minute break in between. Ha! Did you know I have to run mile 20 

miles, and then, without a break at all, I have to run another 6.2 miles? Amaaaaaazing, right? I KNOW! We ought to tell Bob Costas. 

And then there’s this runner, see, who is going to try to run BOTH the 800 and the 1500-meter races? Jiminy, Prez, I do that 16 times back-to-back-to-back-to-back-toback-to-back-to-back-to-back-to-back, 

and THEN I cool down for thirteen miles. Emma says it looks like I’m cooling down for 25 miles, but I think she’s mistaking me for 

Korecki. 

Funny how that other President tweeted Michael Phelps for accumulating 19 medals. What’s that all about? I’ve got 74, but he never wrote to me. Somebody in D.C. 

just isn’t doing their research. 

There’s some weird stuff going on at these games. When we were kids, we invented a game we called Hocket: like hockey without the sticks combined with basketball 

without the hoops, we bounced a ball up and down the driveway, throwing it past the goalies to score. Well, I just turned on some NBC sister station, and what’s on? 

Hocket! But they are calling it Team Handball! Isn’t that something? My life has been one constant source of inspiration, huh? 

Here’s a debatable item. They are calling shooting a sport. Now, I am not downplaying their abilities, but shooting seems more like a skill, like painting, or piano 

playing. Anyway, training is done with this little tiny barbell they squeeze with their index finger (no gym membership required). Mine is red. This is all good news, though 

Prez, for it ends that whole debate about golf not being a sport! Golf has been added to the Olympics for 2016, too! That’s great! But I do wonder if somebody is about to 

propose beer pong. The Germans perhaps, or maybe the Belgians. 

It was always my dream to be an Olympian. I remember specifically thinking I would compete in the long jump, as the pole vault seemed, well, awfully high. Now, I am 

no pessimist, and I hate to admit it, but despite all the practice I’ve done since I met you, qualifying in the marathon for me is just one of those ships that has sailed, sigh. I 

do have a new, realistic goal, though. I am pretty good at badminton, reflexes like an NHL goalie, and I’m pretty sure we still have a net in the basement. 

Mrs. Rev. hints that I might get closer to the Olympics as a reporter than as an athlete, especially if I specialize in just two sports, the marathon because of all you’ve 

taught me, and some second sport. I found it. It isn’t getting nearly enough coverage, nor with the charm, class, and suavitee (suavitay... suaveitey…. presence), that I would 

bring to it. And when I get my credentials, Prez, you can come with me to these under-covered women’s beach volleyball games. 

Commenting on the Olympic marathon would be way cool, because of the information I have that those elite commentators have forgotten. Like, “Did you see that? 

He grabbed the wrong water bottle and had to go back! That’ll cost him! What these games need are more volunteers!” Or, “These guys are tired! There’s no excuse for 

that, Brent! We have seventeen flavors of gu! Man would that help them when they reach Big Ben!” Or, “Their pace is off! They should be able to run and talk at the same 

time!” Well, they would be smarter if they got some Macon mentoring through the middle miles. 

Ok, seriously? 

If we have the ability to run a four-hour marathon, get this: if we started, fresh, at mile post 26… and the leader of the Olympic marathon, after his 26-mile “warm-up,” 

came along… he has the ability to beat us from there to the finish line. 

“We are all champions.” 

Yes, certainly. But, we are different kinds of champions. 

We all can, and maybe ought to be, amazed at other people, eh? Very, very amazed. 


Luvya, 

Rev 

dgkienz@yahoo.com 

32

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