1940 Magnet Yearbook

97
AN EARTHWORM EPIC
Louise Ring,
sa
In the rich black earth of a respectable
back yard there once lived a not-sa-respectable
young earthworm named Stephen A.
Wrigglepuss. What the 'A' stood for, nobody
knew; it was a deep, dark secret. I
might as well admit it in the beginning,
Stephen was definitely a tough egg. His
ambition was to become Earthworm Enemy
Kumber 1, and as the story opens he was
doing all right. He had but recently K.O.'d
a robin by ecuring himself firmly in the
ground, and then, while the unfortunate
bird was pulling with all his might, Stephen
let go suddenly, thus braining the robin
with a terrific blow. It was little acts like
this that made Stephen
A. Wrigglepuss
an outcast from polite
society.
Besides being a
pugnacious sort of
chap, Steve (he preferred
this sterner
cognomen) was definitely
uncouth. He
was fond of spitting
and swearing, and
frequently said 'aint't'
and 'oh, yeah?'-expressions
that no well-behaved worm would
dream of using. Several times he had tried
to break through the upper crust of earthworm
society 'but because of little acts like
these they always gave him the cold segment,
whispering among themselves that
he was not "Comme il faut". But Steve
didn't care; he just went on building up a
reputation for toughness.
But, dear reader, Steve had, beneath that
tough epidermis of his, a heart; a rough
sort of structure it is true, (5 pair of aortic
arches conneoted to 5 main blood vessels)
but still a heart; and it beat fervently whenever
he saw the beautiful young Brenda,
gliding with superlative gracefulness
through the moist earth. Brenda, the
Xumber One Glamour \Vorm of the season,
was very lovely, her skin was exquisitely
slimy and iridescent, and Charm, with a
capital C, stood out all over her. She of
course ignored the lonely Steve; but sometimes
she admired him secretly in her innocent
heart. She thought him oh so different
from the namby-pamby playboys who
surrounded her, lured by her wealth anrl
beauty. Steve was a He-man!
Alas I