Dylan Owen-Buoy, Idiocy of a Cricketer (Part 1 & 2) (PDF ... - Scope

Idiocy of a Cricketer (Part 1)
There exists a very knuckleheaded cricketer
His fame of being knuckleheaded is nothing short of spectacular
Though he is good at what he does, he isn’t exactly the smartest
He doesn’t care about it though he just likes to play regardless
This mysterious being is titled the ‘Dylbag’ and ‘Dylbag’ means me!
No one else is entitled to this name since it only suits me effectively
Should I approach you must be wary
You must watch out for my happy rampages since they can be quite scary
My friends don’t exactly seem to mind, which comforts me
I am not worried to hide my feelings so I can just be me.
Through a tunnel of my craziest moments you will be guided
Now strap yourselves in, you’re in for one hell of a ride.
“First and foremost and usually cause myself pain reactions
many of my team-mates say that my sensibility is on short rations
be prepared for the stories of Idiocies of a Cricketer
well here I go, this is where it all starts.”
I recall a certain match which had to be the best
I got so hurt I needed two days rest
There was a certain batsman giving us absolute hell
I come into bowl and take him out with the first ball of my spell
Then came the second ball of which I forgot to let go
It crashing into the ground and back between my eyes
The whole world then went as white as the clouds in the skies
Dylan Owen-Buoy

Idiocy of a Cricketer (Part 2)
“When I was batting that day, I was running for the other crease
the bat then flew outta my hand as if covered with grease
it span in the air and hit me in the head
everyone was laughing and told me to hit the ball instead
I fell over backwards onto the stump so I was arched
it felt so painful, when I got up I was totally hunched
“SON OF A!!!”, I cursed I really wanted to continue my innings
but I knew I couldn’t since my body was still stinging
“Oh well, let’s plough into another game”
as usual it went the same way me out there will equal pain
I failed to stop a certain boundary and chased it up the hill
On the way down I fell in a hole and twisted my heel
Three times I tried to get up and three times I fell
My mates said “Dylbag when we get back you’re in for hell”
I was still laughing despite the fact I was face down in the dirt
I don’t care though we won the game
And I had fun all the same
When we got back to the clubrooms they really let me have it
My friends say that when I smile it is as if candles have been lit
Dylan Owen-Buoy