Informer December 2012 Issue - Woodlynde School

December 19, 2012
MAGAZINE
Horrible-Scopes
Editor’s note: Warning, this article could contain mature
content and may not be suitable for young children.
ARIES- The extreme weather we’ve been having isn’t going to take the holidays off. There is a 50 percent
chance of snow and a 99 percent chance that Jack Frost is going to do more than nip at your nose.
TAURUS- Your parents are going to buy you a pair of really expensive white gold hoops, but you’ll have
to pretend like you don’t even like them because two years ago, Regina George told you that hoop earrings
were “her thing”.
GEMINI- Don’t fret about your size this holiday season. What you lack in height will be made up for in
your high productivity and performance when you are sold into the elf slave-trade industry.
CANCER- Your family will excommunicate you because you made the thrifty and disgusting choice to
bring the leftover desserts from Thanksgiving to Hanukkah.
LEO- You’ll be assigned an eight-page research paper on Kwanzaa, though not even the Internet claims
to know exactly what it is. Good luck finding a single source.
VIRGO- You’ll have to live with the stigma of being THE WORST gift giver in your family when you
choose the last-minute present of magazine subscriptions. Because of a typo, Grandma will receive
Tiger Beat and your One Direction-loving cousin will get Readers Digest.
LIBRA- Make sure you stay on your toes; a man scruffy in red is making sure he knows when you are
sleeping, knows when you are awake, and knows if you have been bad or good. So you better watch your
step for goodness sake. Just kidding! He is actually going to rob you.
SCORPIO- Frosty the Snowman is going to come to life and insult you on your lack of skill in snowball
rolling.
SAGITTARIUS – Because you were too lazy to make plans for bringing in the New Year, you’ll have to
learn the hard way when you’re forced to watch the less-than-tolerable movie New Year’s Eve.
CAPRICORN– You are going to lose the baby Jesus from the coffee table-sized nativity scene. Be ready
to face backlash from your EXTREMELY religious grandmother. As it turns out, a baby carrot is not
only an extremely obvious substitute, but extremely offensive.
AQUARIUS- Reindeer are going on strike, and in this economy you can’t pass up a job. Strap on those
antlers and take one for the team.
PISCES– It turns out the substance you used to make those derides is in fact not clay ... I’ll spare you
the details. Ew.
Music Review:
Battle Born Doesn’t Quite Meet Expectations
Phillip Phillips Has a Few High Points
The Killers Review
As a Killers fanatic, I anticipated only the
best from their new album Battle Born, released
on Sept. 18th.
Their older albums, Sam’s Town, Day and
Age and Hot Fuss, have a special place on my
iPod, and I was
ecstatic to add
Battle Born to
my sacred collection
of their
work.
Frontman Brandon Flowers has a voice
you just can’t miss. It’s the kind of voice that
when you hear it, you automatically know
you’re listening to The Killers. The band as a
whole has been on a roll with their music so
far and I had such high expectations for their
new album.
When I finally
gave the album
a listen,
shockingly, my
heart sank. I was
surprised to find
that they weren’t
as amazing as
they used to be.
Cassia Enright
Magazine Editor
Samantha
Goodman
Music Critic
Their past
songs were as
original as it got,
and I feel as though the tracks in Battle Born
are a little too reminiscent of their previous
hits. The single off of the album, Runaways, is
decent if you aren’t familiar with the band.
For me, though, it just doesn’t cut it.
I would rate this album three out of five
stars.
To be fair, though, I still give them an A for
effort. After all, it’s almost impossible to top
their legendary older music.
All in all, their new album isn’t my cup of
tea. Maybe it’s because I’ve already drank it.
Phillip Phillips Review
Phillip Phillips, crowned as the winner
of American Idol season 11, released
his album charmingly titled, The World
From the Side of the Moon in mid-
November via Interscope Records.
Phillips, being the singer-songwriter
that he is, wrote the majority of songs on
the album with the help of Gregg Wattenberg.
The single off the album, titled Home,
reached number one on the iTunes Pop
chart, and remained in the iTunes Top 5
for eight weeks before it hit double platinum.
Although it sounds highly similar to
basically any song by Mumford and Sons,
Home's lyrics are inspiring, and there is
no doubt that they speak to me.
For example, the line "Settle down, it'll
all be clear; pay
no attention to
the demons;
they fill you
with fear," puts
me in a peaceful
and positive
state of mind.
This would
make an amazing
poem, but
the melody that goes along with it is
nothing to go crazy about.
Although most of the other songs on
the album have the same mellow folk
sound, the track Can't Go Wrong has a
nice, catchy country anthem-like sound to
it. It gives the album just a little bit more
of a variety.
Overall, this record has its high points,
but it's nothing too special. The World
From the Side of the Moon, like its title,
won't be remembered for long.
Director: Sam Mendes
Starring: Daniel Craig, Judi Dench, Javier
Bardem, Ralph Fiennes
Page 9
Movie Review:
Skyfall Hits All
the Right Notes
Synopsis: An attack on MI6 pits James Bond
(Craig) against Silva (Bardem), a cyber-terrorist
with a furious vendetta against M (Dench).
Review: The James Bond series is now fifty years
old, and Skyfall is the
Jeremy perfect anniversary present.
It hits all the right
Cooper
Layout notes that one could
Editor want out of a Bond film
— and then some.
After the misstep of Quantum of Solace following
the series high point of Casino Royale, it’s a
huge treat to see the series get back on track.
This is arguably the most well-made Bond film to
date, with gorgeous cinematography, meticulous
direction and stunning action sequences, especially
at the beginning and end.
Daniel Craig continues to excel as James
Bond, further solidifying the argument that he
may well be the best in the role. This time, the
character is not at 100 percent, which allows
Craig to show Bond at his most vulnerable and
determined. Javier Bardem is a great villain. His
character more or less serves as the antithesis to
Bond and it’s another credit to Craig’s performance
that he prevents Bardem from completely
stealing the show.
Skyfall follows the current trend in the series
of being darker and more realistic. However, it
also works as a throwback to the older films, with
the reintroduction of characters such as Q and a
certain car which will delight fans of the classics.
Skyfall also rivals
Casino Royale as the
most emotional film in
the series. This is
largely due to the
character development
of Bond and M.
In addition, the ending
marks a huge
change in the status
quo, showing a brave
decision on the
filmmakers’ part.
Consensus: Skyfall
successfully continues
the trend of a darker, more character-driven
Bond film while also serving as a celebration of
the classics. It’s one of the best in the series to
date and quite possibly the best action film of the
year.
Verdict: 9.3 out of 10
Lincoln Succeeds
Director: Steven Spielberg
Starring: Daniel Day-Lewis, Sally Field, Tommy
Lee Jones, Joseph Gordon-Levitt, David
Strathairn
Synopsis: When people think of great U.S. presidents,
they think of Abraham Lincoln. The film
covers the last four months in the life of the
Great Emancipator, played by Daniel Day-Lewis,
as he attempts to end the Civil War and pass the
Thirteenth Amendment, which will rectify slavery.
Consensus: Led by another
staggering performance
from Day-Lewis,
an excellent script, and
one of the best casts of
the year, Lincoln succeeds
where many recent
biopics have failed in
crafting a layered, engaging
and moving portrait
of its iconic subject.
Verdict: 9 out of 10