Service Children Support Network - RAF Benevolent Fund

My Daddy’s
Going Away…
By Lt Col Chris MacGregor KRH
My children are now 8 and 6 years old. They
attend a small comprehensive primary school
near Reading and have just truly settled in.
They are now known by the staff and children
alike and have carved their niches.
At the end of this term, however, they will
move again to another school: the third for Ben
and the second for Ellie (this does not include
the various kindergartens and nurseries they
have been to in Germany and England). They
will have to mourn their lost friends and make
new ones, establish themselves once more in
the hierarchy of class politics, settle into new
teaching styles and environments and
demonstrate their talents and admit their
weaknesses once more.
The teachers will try hard to understand their
backgrounds and their previous reports, but
they will, inevitably, want to make their own
assessments of the children. In some regards,
this movement is a good thing. Military
children tend to be more confident and
accepting of change (and schools appear to
enjoy having them), but it is also destabilizing
and it is hard for the children. We will have
moved house over their school summer
holidays and while they are settling into their
new home and school, both their Mum and Dad
will start new jobs.
I was on a 9 month operational tour to HQ ISAF
Joint Command in Kabul over much of the last
year and I am very proud of their resilience. In
part, this has been developed by their lifestyle
to date and their parenting, but as many
readers will attest, it has not been easy.
Only I asked for these circumstances, but (for
the time being) my family follow and for that I
am very grateful. It is no surprise that military
families, who move as the military machine
dictates, are in the spotlight right now. They
(you) deserve to be. There should be no
sacrifice on their part for my career serving this
country - but at times I know that they offer
more than they know. It is my job as a father
and as a serving officer to mitigate that as best I
can for both my family and others. If we are to
ensure that a smaller, more effective, military
can prosper in the future, with potentially more
reservists and less regular Service personnel, a
holistic approach to family welfare must exist. I
came to this obvious conclusion as a Company
Commander in Iraq in 2007 and from that
moment, started to think about the mutual
benefits to the organization, its personnel, their
families and children of better support to
Service families and their children. When we go
on holiday I know that if my wife will only be
happy if the childcare is excellent and the
children are happy - if not, I face severe
reprimand. The same philosophy should exist
when it comes to our working environment too;
if we are to function well in war zones around
the world, there should be as little conflict at
home as possible.