The Vinferno - Bonny Doon Vineyard

“I’d rather drive a Red Truck on Earth than drink 1865 Lafite in Hell.”
Chimed in Dr. Chaptal, “Being dead is really quite a bugger,
But, let’s not on these grave matters dwell.
“Veuve, be a doll and give your daddy-doctor some sugar.”
The very thought of a coupling of two decrepit necrophiles…
Yet I tried hard to remain a non-judgmental onlooker.
They were both consenting (if dead) seniors acting juvenile.
“Live and let live,” ironically proposed Jacob Schram.
“We’re all a little hot and bothered down here,” he ventured with a smile.
Schram continued, “In fact, I would not myself have any qualms
Nor fear appearing to be the least bit kooky,
In proposing the following to my friend, Gustave Niebaum:
“Why don’t we essay to score a little Inglenookie?”
I was heartened to know that wine’s great pros
Despite their reduced circs still hoped to quote, unquote “get lucky.”
Noblet gestured to me that it was soon time to go.
But I could not leave without seeing to it
That I bid one last adieu to M. Emile Peynaud.
And leave best wishes for the brilliant Lee Stewart. 16
It was raining pennies 17 from Heaven (or Hell) perhaps,
When I was saluted by the great Max Schubert.
And before I left I had to inquire, “What were the haps?”
In greeting Baron Philippe Rothschild,
Dr. Thanisch, J.J. Prüm, and several other noteworthy chaps.
“These men led a life in wine rather than had a wine ‘life-style.’
You may call them vinachronisms, hopelessly démodé.
They were (Baron R. excepted) humble, modest, low-profile.
“Unlike the enormous swollen heads one observes today
Before the cult of ‘wine personality’ and the practice of wine ‘branding.’”
My guide was rather insistent this particular point to convey.
“Lest there be no gross misunderstanding,
The Great Ones remain classiques even in death,
The fact they were unrated notwithstanding.”
A squat, beetle-browed figure, puffing mightily, out of breath,
In a cloud of billowy smoke he hovered, eyes ablaze.
It could have only been the legendary Tchelistcheff.
It was well before the popular film, “Sideways”
That André made California’s greatest pinot noir. 18
We bid farewell and strode onward into the gathering haze.
(to be continued)
16 Greatly beloved founder and winemaker of Chateau Souverain during the ‘40s and ‘50s.
17 Penfold’s Wine Pty Limited, (now subsumed by the corporate giant, Southcorp Inc.), the company for whom Max Schubert
invented “Grange Hermitage,” was sometimes referred to as Pennies, by its many growers in South Australia, typically in the
context of, “So d’ya reckon that Pennies will pay anything for shee-raz grapes this yee-ah?”
18 Beaulieu Vineyard’s legendary 1946 Napa Pinot Noir, the elegant likes of which have not been tasted again.