HEDY MAG ISSUE 1

le women give up so much control over their
bodies? Is it shame? Might the tales of fallen
women, or the Madonna/ whore complex stop
us acting in our own interests? Our virginity
is something that is lost, opposed to our first
sexual experiences being experiences gained.
Men often feel the pressure of the slut/stud binary
and are too embarrassed to ask if they’re
doing it right, or accept being told what actually
does it for us. Which assumes we know what
does it for us. By the time we ditch our promise
rings, chances are we’re a bit messed up by our
flabby or lack of flabby bits. If not that, then the
fear of smelling or tasting unpleasant, as though
the human race hasn’t managed to keep going
a few millenia without electric showers, plastic
surgery, brazilians and modern day toiletries. In
fact... wasn’t that what sex was like in the nineties?
On the plus side, vibrator sales have been
rising dramatically. One day I might even be
able to travel with one without worrying about
it going off during a suitcase check at customs.
Women are using them to experience their first
orgasms and if we’re a bit more confident, introducing
them to our partners in the bedroom.
But they’re also being used as a substitute for
sex and so far, nothing I know of with a battery
can replace the meaningfulness, emotions
or desire in togetherness. So let’s start a conversation
and break some taboos. Let’s start a
trend: HERS FIRST! What if all parties put each
other’s pleasure first? Society’s attitudes change
by default if we change our own. Mechanics, after
all, are on our side. Get it right and we can
orgasm again, and again, and again, and again.
That’s gotta make a little extra effort getting there
worth it, right?
WORDS BY KATE ANDERSON
HEDY 47