Contents - NACoA

concern. Furthermore, if care is taken to avoid communicating that the child’s difficulties
are related to his or her parent’s alcoholism, and if you direct attention to the child’s
program and social performance, the parent is very likely to welcome your help.
Since you do not diagnose alcoholism or problem drinking, it is unlikely that alcoholism
will be a part of the discussion when you are talking to parents. Denial of
drinking-related problems is essential to those alcoholic parents who want to continue
drinking. The spouse of an alcoholic may also feel the need to refrain from talking
about drinking-related difficulties. If the topic comes up, it may be best for you to
remain silent on the subject of the parent’s drinking, and concentrate on steps to
help the child cope.
Perhaps your greatest contribution will be in the area of helping children to
discover that their feelings are normal and that it is permissible to be confused
and sometimes upset about one’s home environment. Exploring a child’s feelings
with him or her can help you to obtain a better understanding of the child. More
importantly, an exploration of feelings may allow the child to grow in self understanding.
Encourage children to develop friendships and good social skills.
Some children of alcoholics have difficulty relating to their peers and adults.
Like all children, they need opportunities to participate in primary group activities.
However, many children of alcoholics need help to do so. Early childhood
professionals who lead extracurricular and community-based activities have many
opportunities to assist in fostering quality relationships for boys and girls who
have alcoholic parents. Like others, these children can acquire many benefits from
after-school activities. However, for children of alcoholics, the more obvious benefits
of after-school activities may be secondary to the benefits achieved through
the friendships developed in the program. A child not only learns how to take part
in a sport, publish a newspaper, etc., but also gains a sense of belonging and a role
that he or she values.
Children of alcoholics may take on adult roles and responsibilities in their
families—such as caring for younger children or managing housework—and therefore
they can benefit from situations where there is an adult in
charge. They may also benefit when an adult is supervising
their younger siblings.
You can play a vital role in assisting these
children by getting them involved in other activities.
However, getting children of alcoholics to participate
in group activities may be difficult. Many such
children are not eager to join activity groups. This
is particularly true if they feel that an after-school