Asian Beacon

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A CHRISTIAN’S
CONFESSION: I SUFFER
FROM DEPRESSION
In Part 1 of this story, we learn that Janey (not her
real name) has had depression and panic attacks
since she was 11 years of age. Now in her 30s,
she has learned to manage her condition better,
thanks to her faith in God and acceptance of
herself. In this final part of her story, she shares
how her difficult experiences honed her character
and sharpened her faith. By Mok Shi-Lynn
is an
ongoing process,”
Janey says. “My
depression is not
“Healing
gone. It’s still my
temperament: I’m anxious and prone to
stress and worry. But I’ve come to realise
that acceptance is very important. I used to
blame myself and tell myself ‘you should’
or ‘you shouldn’t’, or compare myself
with others and wonder why I couldn’t
be like them. But when I accept it, I’m
acknowledging that this is me.
“I read a book in which the author
asked, ‘Who are you to belittle yourself
– someone whom God loves so much?
Who are you to say that you’re not good
enough when God provided so much for
you?’ That’s when I truly saw God’s love.
So I accepted all my flaws and weaknesses
– that I am a worrier, anxious, panicky,
fearful, depressed – and I thought, ok, now
I’ll deal with it.”
Naturally, Janey used to pray for God
to get rid of her condition. However, with
self-discovery, knowledge and acceptance,
she has arrived at a remarkable conclusion
that speaks of confidence and faith in God.
“Asking God to get rid of the problem is the
easy way out. If God makes my problems
simply disappear without me working
through them and dealing with them, then
what will I have learned? As I work through
my depression, I realise that it has made me
stronger. God will get rid of my depression
when He sees fit, and I am ok with that.”
Drawing strength and reassurance
Part 2
from God, Janey has a perspective on faith
and suffering that has been refined by her
personal experiences. “Whatever happens,
there’s a reason for it. I might hate what I’m
going through, but God has a better purpose.
At the end of the day, our moods, emotions
or circumstances should not dictate our
faith. A mature Christian does not base
his faith on his feelings. After all, we know
that our God has already conquered death,
defeated Satan and won the victory. Real joy
and hope is readily available to us, and these
are not based on external factors.
“Strong, experienced Christians are not
happy-go-lucky all the time. They have their
bad moments too. But how do they handle it
and still feel joy? It’s because they know who
God is, where God stands and where they
stand with God. This is their assurance and
security. And for me, this is the difference
between having God and not knowing Him.
When I battle depression and panic attacks,
I know I have one true God who cares for
me and I am in safe hands.”
How to support people with mental conditions
1. Don’t be judgmental. “Get to know the person. Some people earn good
salaries, have great friends, a loving family and a generally rosy life, yet suffer
depression. Most people will say, ‘That’s so silly. You have everything. Are
you not content with life? You probably brought it on yourself.’ That is really
demeaning. Understand that a ‘normal person’, such as myself with a close-knit,
happy family, friends and a regular job, can have depression. I didn’t ask for it.
And please don’t say that Christians should not have depression.”
2. Listen without giving advice.“People always think they need to say something
when it’s really more important to just listen. And as Christians, we somehow think
that if we put God into our advice, then everything will be fine. They tend to say
‘God knows what you’re going through’ or ‘your depression will be lifted because
God is good!’ It doesn’t work that way and I really don’t need to hear that. I just
need you to sit down, listen to what I have to say, allow me to pour out my feelings,
cry with me, then pat me on the back and say, ‘Things might not get better, but I am
here for you. Whenever you need help, just call me.’ I just need the assurance that
you are available, you care and I can count on you.”
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