, We've got squirrels in our quad! - St Peter's College

TheologyIf you’re reading this because you’re going to be studying theology, feel smug. If you’re not goingto be, feel jealous. Life as a theologian consists of swanning around, writing barely an essaya week, waking up late without consequence and generally doing very little. Whilst scientistswill be up for labs and lectures at 9 a.m everyday, the Theologian is the academic equivalent ofthe sloth. Slow, purposeful- but wise. Crafty. Ok, so maybe sloths aren't the best example.We're more like the leisurely bastard offspring of an owl and a fox. A Fowl. Errr, that isn't good.Crap. Anyway, throwing the straws of Shit metaphor aside which I'm desperately clutching,you’re going to be reading Theology at SPC. So, here are some facts.One of the most varied courses in Oxford, you'll broadly have to do some Biblical studies, historyand doctrine. If you’re doing Philosophy as well, (a PhilThe, as you'll come to be known!),you'll get the joys of logic, Mill and Descartes, among other options. The courses vary onlyslightly in the first year- if you’re a Theologian you have the daunting task of learning a dead(boring) language- either Greek or Hebrew normally (other languages are being introduced aswell, eg. Quranic Arabic!). However, the tuition is excellent- even I managed to get through itwell enough in Prelims despite my inability to even string 2 words together in French! You candrop it after 2 terms anyway, so it is a small price to pay. Of course, you may love the language,become a professional Greek scholar and argue about the meaning of obscure propositions as acareer. However, before your up, you'll get language summer work. Generally, as a rule, ignoringall summer reading lists and work is possible. However, do the language work. Do it well. Do alittle more than required. The last thing you want in freshers’ week is introductory sessionswhere you need to think and learn the morning after the night before. Trust me. O, and beforeall you PhilThes boastfully laugh at our linguistic lament, however, you'll have the joys of logicclasses and logic sheets- so things work out fairly evenly between the single and joint honoursschool!In the first year, all Theologians and PhilThe's offer 3 papers for Prelims. Both must do a paperon Mark's Gospel, usually taught at Mansfield college, with the option to do either Old Testamentor the interdisciplinary study of religions as the second paper. Theologians then offer alanguage and PhilThes a Philosophy module.The only real difference between Theology, as a single or joint school, from most subjects, is thetiming of exams. The double edged sword of examinations means that along with lawyers, wehave our preliminary exams a term earlier than any other subject. No one knows why. Some saythat is because the signs of the zodiac align better in Hilary term. Others, that early examinationsenable theologians to affirm their status as lazy, work shy cretins in Trinity. Whilst thisdoes mean that Hilary term can be a stressful time, the subsequent Trinity term in one of thefinest in Oxford- in comparison to your peers! A lack of summer exams means that the GreatBritish summer can be enjoyed in all its glory- picnics in the rain, punting in the rain, Pimm's inthe rain- what more could you possibly want? I've even managed to catch cold writing this onmy laptop, in the rain! Following the tyranny of exams, you can choose 3 broad tracks for rest ofyour degree: Biblical studies, history and doctrine, or world religions. The choice of both Theologyand Philosophy and Theology means that you get to dabble in just about every academicfield you want. Which is nice. Any further questions (don't ask me about the existence of God)e-mail peter.oconnor@spc.ox.ac.uk, or facebook stalk me. I'll happily answer anything you haveto ask! Peter O'Connor.38