CLAM UP!! - Seren - Bangor University

14 Seren - Christmas Issue 20072007?1960s 1970s 1980s 1990s 2000sHaving pretty much entirely avoidedthe furore afforded The X-Factor thisyear (excepting Rhydian, Sharon Osbourne’srevolving door policy to working onthe show and, uh, Rhydian) , I won’t be ableto give you a considered judgement on whosegoing to win and be elevated to the statusof “This Year’s Christmas No.1 Winner-inwaiting”.It has, however, got me to thinkingabout the origins of this one-time phenomena,and what it means in an age where digitaldownloading hysteria has all but eliminatedthe chances of Christmas singles becoming“A Major Event” except in the eyes of red-toptabloids, willing to publicise a scrap for salesat a time often found wanting for news storiesof a more sober nature.The stem for this resulting hullaballoowas arguably the Slade vs. Wizzard battle ofChristmas past, circa 1973 to be more precise.The two rock bands of the glam persuasionwaged what was effectively commercial waragainst each other, Slade weighing in with‘Merry Xmas Everybody’ whilst Wizzardchose to duke it out with ‘I Wish It Could BeChristmas Everyday’. Though Wizzard lostthe battle, settling for the runner-up spot andchoking on the dust of Slade’s triumphant effort,they arguably penned the more resoundingtune – see almost every chain departmentstore at Christmas time herding bargainseekingconsumers through their doors withoffers of cheap tat and the majority of shamelessChristmas TV ads blaring at elderly folktoo strung out on their tipple of choice to doRemember the theme to BBC’s PlanetEarth? That was the sound of SigurRos and its dramatic and stirringbeauty was the perfect match for the programme,winning the hearts of the nationand bringing the uncompromising Icelandicfour-piece a completely unforeseenlevel of success. In fact 2005’s Takk wasthe band’s fourth album and their recentreleases- 2CD set ‘Hvalf/Heim’ and DVD‘Heima’- round up over a decade of musicdating back to 1995s debut album ‘Von’.After touring the world with ‘Takk’,Sigur Ros returned home to Iceland wherethey played in thirteen locations across thecountry. Described rather interestingly as‘A film by Sigur Ros’, ‘Heima’ is a documentof this unique and fascinating tour whichis recommended as strongly for its stunningphotography as it is for its music.Each location in which the band playsoffers a completely different scene and atmosphere,making ‘Heima’ far more interestingto watch than a conventional music DVD.‘Heysatan’ is performed outside amongst anumber of dilapidated rural houses by thecliffs and sea, ‘Gítardjamm’ is played in anatmospheric abandoned factory and fittingly,much else but blare incoherently at the offendinggoggle-box for disturbing their slumberfor compelling evidence.Since then, everything from the sublime(The Flaming Lips’ Christmas At The Zoo) tothe ridiculous (Bo’ Selecta’s “Proper Crimbo!”,“The Blobby Song” - by he of Crinkly Bottomfame- , and any South Park affiliated single)to the frankly bobbins (the Christmas-themedworks of Chris De Burgh and Cliff Richard– music’s own Axis of Evil TM) has been releasedin an effort to capture some twinklingof nostalgia, or more likely, to sate the needof parents’ desperate need for one more lastminutestocking-filler, whilst stocks last.As I stated earlier however it appears thatthis tradition, nay institution, is going the wayof the dogs. (To visualise this previous sentence,imagine Winston Churchill or someequally iconic British figure with a solitary tearrolling down patriotic cheek… whilst clutchinga copy of the Daily Mail, natch). Short ofPaul Phoenix lookie-likey Rhydian releasingsome Tekken-related single after destroyingthe competition (and hopefully, by extension,the set) on the final of X-Factor, anything elseis most likely resigned to comparatively meagresales and little interest. Since Girls Aloud’snumber one in 2002 with the festive ‘SoundOf The Underground’, the Christmas chartshave been dominated by Cowell’s offspring,which has led to bookies taking bets on themore unpredictable Christmas number twosinstead. This means that this year it is in theshadows that some interesting ChristmasSigur Ros - Heima DVD‘Vaka’ is performed acoustically and withoutelectricity at a protest camp-again outdoors -where a dam is being built amongst Iceland’sstunning, unspoilt highlands. Each locationand performance is punctuated by interviewswith the band which provide background toeach scene - and rousing, artistic photographywhich really complements the music:choices lurk. Chief among them are New Yorkbased dreampop group Asobi Seksu (Japanesefor ‘playful sex’), who have released a cover ofThe Ramones’ Merry Christmas (I Don’t Wantto Fight) this Monday. If it maintains the tunefactor that made this year’s full-length ‘Citrus’so good then it’s a sure bet.BBC Radio One DJ Colin Murray hasjumped on the back of Malcolm Middleton ofArab Strap fame and his macabre song ‘We’reAll Going To Die’. According to Middleton,“Dying is a bit like writing a letter to Santa.Unless you’ve been a good boy or girl, you’refucked.” Can’t imagine your granny singingalong to that one. The public seems to be buyingit though: William Hill has extended theodds from 1000/1 (the longest ever odds) to12/1, making it the fourth favourite.Several rungs above on the publicity-hoggingladder are the omnipresent headliners ofthis year’s Glastonbury Saturday night, TheKillers. Following on from last year’s ‘A GreatBig Sled’ single, they’re trying their luck thisyear with ‘Don’t Shoot Me Santa’. Ho, ho, andindeed ho. What this song has to do with theAIDS charities the profits will be funnelled toas part of the RED campaign, I have no idea,but it is a very worthy cause if you can ignorethe presence of U2’s Bono (aka King Ego)pulling the strings behind the scenes. It’s outnow.Where would the Christmas charts bewithout some sort of collaboration? Grantedthis usually involves some boy band or ex boyimages of children playing by the sea, kitesflying, waterfalls gushing, ice melting, thegrass blowing in the wind. It’s the perfectcomplement to Sigur Ros’s unique brand ofintensely serious and emotional music.Disc 2 features the performances infull- separately, without the documentaryfootage - and includes some wonderfulmoments which were not part of the mainfeature - particularly the gorgeous, acousticDVD title-track ‘Heima’, the instrumental‘Samskeyti’ played in a room full of candlesand the complete version of ‘Takk’s’ upliftingpeak- ‘Se Lest’ - with its dreamy, soothingxylophone chimes and a truly joyousfull brass-band climax.Sigur Ros’s music is strange, unique,sometimes dramatic and heavy, and alwaysserious, emotional and powerful. By addinga visual dimension to the music, ‘Heima’seems like the perfect demonstrationof everything the band has ever strived toachieve. It’s a landmark in the bands careerand sets an entirely new standard for musicDVDs.Chris Carterband member (see Westlife and Diana Ross,Christmas 2005; Robbie Williams and NicoleKidman, Christmas 2001) but this year seesthe advent of the indie-collaboration. Art Brutand The Black Box Recorder have joined forcesto create The Black Arts (www.myspace.com/christmasnumberonetheblackarts) and releasea single, the ingeniously named ‘ChristmasNumber One’. It is naturally all very tongue incheek and the video involves the band recreatinga traditional nativity play, complete withEddie Argos dressed up as Joseph. Definitelyworth a look.Continuing the charity theme is AnarchyXmas (www.myspace.com/anarchyxmas), atwo-dozen strong collective with eyes on theNo.1 prize in aid of causes such as Cancer Researchand Friends of the Earth. Their ‘SmellsLike Christmas’ is out this week too, andis hoping to put Simon Cowell on his hightrouseredarse. Finally, also looking to hit theX-Factor where it hurts, i.e. the wallet is Last.FM’s hand-chosen combatants Lucky Soul,who won an online vote to secure their Cowell-baitingspot. Their effort, Lips Are Unhappy,is released on the 17th for the princely sumof 40p. It’s download-only, so it faces an uphillstruggle of David and Goliath proportions,but at least the tussle promises to be violentand not without casualties. And after all, isn’tthat the true meaning of Christmas? Er…Stephen DaviesCDs, clothes, alcohol – there are plentyof other things much more deservingof your cash than wasting it all on rent.Try not to think of how much your halls orhouse is costing you over the course of a year,it’ll only depress you.With this inmind, NME.comhave teamed upwith Virgin Moneyto offer one luckystudent an entireyear’s worth of rentpaid on your behalf,freeing you up toconcentrate on the real necessities.All you need to do is go to NME.com andclick on the Student Guide section where you’llsee the now infamous NME Music Quiz. Answer20 questions by NME as fast as you canThis year’s oddsaccording toWilliam Hill:2/7 X Factor winner (with Rhydianat 1/3)4/1 Sugababes - Change7/1 Soulja Boy – Crank That12/1 Malcolm Middleton – We’re AllGoing To Die14/1 Shaun the Sheep – Life’s ATreat14/1 Andy Williams – It’s The MostWonderful Time Of The Year33/1 Amy Winehouse - Love Is ALosing Game40/1 Enrique Iglesias – Tired Of BeingSorry50/1 Kate Nash – Pumpkin Soup66/1 Asobi Seksu – Merry Christmas(I Don’t Want To Fight)66/1 Newton Faulkner - Teardrop66/1 Lauren Rose – I Go To TheBeach66/1 Stereophonics – My FriendsWIN!!! YOURRENT PAIDFOR A YEAR!!!and cross your fingers. The scores will all berecorded and the winner will be announcedonce the deadline of January 30th 2008 comesaround. You can also check the leaderboard tosee which university is the most Rock’n’Rollwith more brainy types than the rest. At themoment, BangorUniversity hasn’t yetearned a place so weall need to put in theeffort and show howclever we all are!The quiz goeslive on December3rd and will haveloads of promotion in the paper and on thehomepage of NME.com so make sure you getin there nice and early to be in with a chanceof winning.