WILD ATTRACTION WILD ATTRACTION - Earthstar

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<strong>WILD</strong> AttractionThe Hidden Force thatMakes or BreaksRelationshipBy Paul and Patricia RichardsIn their new book Wild Attraction: A RuthlesslyPractical Guide to Extraordinary Relationship,Paul and Patricia Richards turn conventionalwisdom on its head and explore a previouslyunacknowledged force that can make or breakour relationships. They offer a stunning new relationshipmodel that provides the “missing link” to finding andexperiencing an extraordinary and transformative partnership—Energy.According to the Richards, “Westernculture’s entire arsenal of relationship skills deals onlywith physical and psychological factors associated withsex and romance, failing to equip us with the knowledgewe need the most which is this: Relationship is largelycreated or destroyed in the realm of Energy.”The following is excerpted Wild Attraction: A RuthlesslyPractical Guide to Extraordinary Relationship(Chelsion Press/ November 2009).Wild Attraction is a survey of a previously uncharted,energetics-centered view of romantic love. Its core tenetis this: Even though humans have had eleven millionyears of male-female experimentation during which torefine the race’s skills, our most desperately cherishedpremises relating to sexuality and attraction are exactlythe inverse of what works. From an energetically awareperspective, the relationship behaviors that society mostencourages are those that least fulfill the incrediblepromise of gender. The world is, literally, head overheels.Great things await us if we can turn things right side upagain.Energetic Fact of Life #1:The energetic force of gender and attraction is allaround us, and against it we humans have no defense.60 EARTH STAR OCTOBER / NOVEMBER 2009www.earthstarmag.com
This is true despite our culture’s portrayal of sexuality asa force internal to us and under our control. Your bestresponse to this knowledge: Do not take even the mostcommitted love for granted and work diligently everyday to safeguard your fidelity and that of your mate.Also, learn all you can about Wild Attraction.Somewhere out there, in the darkness just beyond theorange and red glow of a metaphorical campfire, lurks areal power of gender-based attraction that nobody canresist. Nobody. This force is an interweaving of twinstreams of non-ordinary Energy that we experience asfeminine and masculine. In not being consciously awareof this fact of life, you might also not realize that neitheryour fidelity, nor your wife’s or husband’s, is really inyour power to guarantee, or intheirs. You won’t yet knowthat any man or woman can becompelled to sleep with,marry, live with, or perhaps lieto any person, against all individualinterests. If you believethat superior character, morality,or religiosity allows anyperson to master these twinstreams, you are able to thinkthis way only because themost exotic of all animals,which for the purposes of thisbook I am calling WildAttraction, has allowed you tothink so.Sexuality and gender, whileobviously fulfilling variousfunctions for the race, includingreproduction, must beseen as constituting somethingentirely different from an internal biological process.Romantic attraction is an external entity that is offeringto enhance individual prospects for the most profoundgrowth of consciousness and attention that is given toyou to ever possibly achieve. Sexuality and gender areabout awakening and then remaining awake. If you donot acknowledge this force and help it meet its nonnegotiableneeds, you can be capsized in the silverywake thrown off by its powerful, purposeful motion. Inthe worst case, you may slowly drown in a gray sea ofloneliness or dysfunctional relationships.Although I am being straightforward about its dangers,this external agency of love is a positive thing. Thosewho come to respect the force of Wild Attractioninevitably find themselves taking the mechanics of gendermuch less for granted. They date more before choosingto have sex or settle down, and tend to screen potentiallovers with a different eye. People who gain a WildAttraction perspective work harder to be viable candidatesfor long-term love. These men and women learnabout and practice the art of keeping a mate, and theystop believing that any promise, contract, or habit willbind two people together for better or for worse.If you are not yet generating a field of attraction thatdraws others to you, and are languishing in what I thinkof as “chronic involuntary singleness,” the problem maynot be that you are unattractive to others but rather thatyou have not yet learned howto attract and work with thispowerful nonhuman romantically. To successfully relate tomates and potential mates, it isarguably wise to focus first onrelating to this unacknowledgedbut huge externalforce—a process that requiresfluency in a more intricate languageof gender than most ofus have been taught from birth.master.Becoming familiar with therules of Wild Attraction isinvaluable, but no degree offamiliarity will ever give anyhuman being the upper hand.The reality of love—that it is awild thing ultimately out of ourcontrol—is far more powerfulthan the illusion of love assomething we can tame orThose who have seen the Wild Attraction animal closeup know something of gender and love as they are aboutto be portrayed here. The poetry of Rumi, Shakespeare,and countless others springs from this particular well.Those who have felt the full force of Wild Attractionknow that no one can offer guarantees—not about sexuality,love, attraction, or fidelity. They know of the existenceof a call that, once it comes, must be obeyed. Noteveryone hears this signal in its full and compellingfury—and thus society perpetuates the myth that oursexuality is a function of biologically based internaldrives alone.www.earthstarmag.com OCTOBER / NOVEMBER 2009 EARTH STAR 61
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