The Wart's Comeuppance - The Woody Back to School Unit

The Wart’sComeuppanceR HumphriesFeaturing the Artwork ofDave EllWoodettes Publications

Published 2010byWoodettes PublicationsHouston, Texas, USA© Woodettes Publications 2010R Humphries has asserted his right to be identified asthe author of this work with all rights reservedincluding the right of reproduction in whole or in partin any form.The Library of Congress has catalogued this edition asfollows Humphries, R [date]The Wart’s Comeuppance : a novel by R Humphries[Application Pending]1st Ed.ISBN – [Application Pending]www.woodettes.wordpress.com

Author’s NoteThis is a work of fiction. Names, characters,places and incidents are either the product of theauthor's imagination or are used fictitiously. Anyresemblance to actual events or locales or persons,living or dead, is entirely coincidental.The stories based at the Woody Back to SchoolUnit are works of adult fiction based upon the real-lifefantasy games played by the author, R. Humphriesand his wife, the inimitable Jojo.It is the author’s intent to create the WoodyBack to School Unit as an imaginative world peopledwith a believable cast and set in familiar surroundingswithin which the readers will become comfortable.The vernacular used in the stories is acombination of the phraseology derived from writingsuch as the British penny comics from the nineteenthirties, current language, slang and idioms, and theinvented parlance known as Woody Jargon.As such references to ‘beating’, ‘thrashing’, and‘flogging’ have no context to the use or avocation ofphysical violence, with the exception of controlledcorporal punishment, against the characters of thestories.

DedicatedtoMy Beloved Jojo

ContentsA Running Bender ............................... 1The Wart Under Fire .......................... 11A Total Muff ..................................... 19

1A Running Bender“Ms Wharton wants to see you up in thelibrary,” the House Grubby informed Deborah Morton.Debs scowled. The grubby took a stepbackwards, nervous that Debs might hack her in theshins.“Don’t shoot me I’m just the messenger,” saidthe grubby hurriedly. “By the way, Ms Whartoninstructed me to tell you to cut along sharpish. Shewas looking pretty shirty.”Deborah just rolled her eyes and noddeddismissively at the grubby. She did not feel the leastbit inclined to cut along sharpish to anywhere andmost certainly not to the library for a chin-wag withthe Wart. A summons to appear before the Mistressof the House was never pleasant in Deborah’sexperience and rarely ended favorably for the healthor safety of her bumbags.She wracked her brains to think of any reasonthat could have caused her to have been summonsed.To the best of her knowledge she had fulfilled all her

HoldHouse duties including acting as a kitchen assistantearlier in the day.Deborah was not generally of a nervousdisposition but as she cut through the labyrinth ofhallways, corridors and stair-wells of the vast complexshe grew increasingly dejected. Her relationship withthe Wart had never been good and she was quitecertain that the Mistress of the House would havesome heinous plan to make things unpleasant for her.She was resigned to the fact that there was a ninetyfiveper cent certainty that she was beingsummoned to be caned, for some unknown reasonand undoubtedly bogus pretext. That would beunpleasant enough, although six strokes from theHouse Captain, Sally Cobb, would be nothing morethan a minor inconvenience to a whop-hardenedveteran like Debs. She was more concerned by theprospect of having to endure an unsavory ration oftongue pie from the odious Wart.She finally reached the long landing that led tothe unit library and trudged towards the large oakdoor. Over the past six years Deborah Morton hadspent a considerable amount of time standing in thecorridor outside the library door, with her hands onher head and her nose pressed to the wall, waiting tobe caned.She took a deep breath and swung the dooropen. She crossed the light and airy reading area untilshe reached a second door. She knocked. She heardthe unmistakable sound of the Wart’s voice bellowing“Come” as if she was a lost puppy. With tremblingfingers she opened the door and stepped in.It took several seconds to acclimatize herself tothe shadowy darkness after the bright lights of the

3study area. The Wart was seated in a leatherarmchair positioned beside the fireplace at the far endof the library. Debs blinked her eyes. To her surprisestanding alongside the Wart was Patsy Butcherdressed in her official Elite regalia. There was no signof Sally Cobb. To Deborah’s consternation shecouldn’t help noticing that Patsy was tapping the tipof a long crook-handled cane against the side of herhigh-heeled shoe.Patsy Butcher had completed her sevenyear sentence at the Woody Back to School Unit atthe end of the previous year. She was now releasedon probation and lived in the local town, where shewas training as a sports therapist. For twelve monthsshe remained under the jurisdiction of the Unit andher activities were monitored to ensure that she wasadhering to the requirements of her socialrehabilitation certification.During her last year at the unit Patsy hadserved as the Captain of the Red House. Patsy andDebs were tight, they worked out together regularlyin the Wellness Center. Nonetheless, Patsy’s tenurehad coincided with Deborah being branded PublicEnemy Number One at the unit and open seasonbeing declared on her bumbags. As Mistress of theRed House the Wart had exploited Deborah’sunfortunate position and she had been subjected toseveral painful altercations with Patsy’s cane on MsWharton’s instruction.With a sense of trepidation Debs made herway down the library. The Wart took a long snort oftequila and rose unsteadily to her feet. Deborahsuspected that she might be some way into her cups.

HoldShe couldn’t help noticing that Patsy was lookingdecidedly uncomfortable.“Put your hands on your head, young lady,”snapped the Wart.Deborah glared at her but did as she was told.“You are a bone idle, inconsideratedegenerate, Morton,” said the Wart. “You failed toturn up for weeding duty and the Blue House hasapplied for our House to be fined fifteen penaltypoints.”“Weeding duty?” asked Deborah incredulously.“I wasn’t on the roster for weeding duty.” She wastaken by surprise and her incredulity was genuine.“The roster was revised; one of our work-forcehad to visit the infirmary. The new roster was postedat lunch-time, so there was plenty of time for you toreview you schedule, there is absolutely no excuse foryour wanton dereliction of duty,” snapped the Wart.Debs heart began to beat uncomfortably fast.She did not like the direction the conversation wastaking.“You have already been beaten twice this yearon House Business. Remind me Morton, what wereyour offenses on those occasions?” asked the Wart.Debs sighed. “Cutting work details, but …”Debs was forced to admit.“No buts’, Morton!” snapped the Wart. “Andthe House was fined on both occasions?”“Yes, Ma’am but,” started Debs.“No buts I said, one more but out of you and Iwill put you over my knee and spank you,” said theWart. She leaned forward in Deborah’s face with herhands on her hips. “Your serial negligence isunforgiveable,” she stormed. “The rest of the House

5is working hard and you just fritter away points dueto your inconsiderate indolence.”Debs stared at the Wart. It was ridiculous.Even taking the fines into account she was by far thehighest accumulator of credits accumulator in thewhole House. “But …” she began to object.“Do you really want me to spank you?”screamed the Wart.“No, Ma’am,” muttered Debs.“I intend to make an example of you Morton, Ihave drafted Butcher in to give you a runningbender,” the Wart informed Debs.“Is this really necessary, Ma’am?” interjectedPatsy.The Wart span around, her eyes blazing. “It isabsolutely necessary and seeing as none of my RedHouse prefects’ are certified to give running bendersthen it is your responsibility as a former Captain ofthe House to deliver the beating. It will look very badon your probation report if you should choose towillfully disobey a direct order from one of yourprobation observers.”Patsy pursed her lips. Momentarily she shot aglance and their eyes met. They were both beingstitched up like kippers.“You have theright to appeal and gobefore the HouseCouncil,” said Patsy."That is correct,Butcher, Morton can filean appeal and I shall filean application for her tobe subjected to a Formal

HoldHouse Beating for Serial Dereliction of Duty," retortedthe Wart.Debs considered this option. She felt thatshe might have a reasonable defense due to the lateposting of the roster. However, most of her close Elitechums were on the Blue House council and were ofno help. She didn’t think that she had any particularenemies, aside from Sally ‘Be-yotch’ Cobb on the RedHouse Council but she was not confident that any ofthe prefects would risk defying the clear wishes of theMistress of the House just to save her bumbags.If she lost the appeal she was certain that theWart would be successful in her move that sheshould to be subjected to a Formal House Beating.Not only would that doubtless involve twelve strokesinstead of six but she would also face the abjecthumiliation of a full-collar walk-through the landings.During the dark year of Operation Scorched Arse shehad been forced to endure the ignominy of beingescorted through the landings with a prefect roughlyholding her by the scruff of her neck and twisting herarm up behind her back on three occasions. Thethought of another repeat of these appallingepisodes made her feel quite bilious.“I’m not appealing,” she said tightly, “I’ll takemy whops.”Deborah watched Patsy shrug off her blazer.There was no question her chum was a magnificentcreature. Standing over six-feet in her high-heels, herlong dreadlocks reaching almost to her waist, herathletes legs seeming to reach up to beneath herarmpits and her blouse seeming to cling to hermuscular torso like a second skin made her appearpositively Amazonian. Debs watched as the

7Rastafarian beauty rolled back her cuffs and loosenedher tie.“I’m going to need you to remove your blazerand bend over in front of the fireplace,” Patsy said,not unkindly.Debs lowered her arms. Her eye caught Patsy’sagain, they exchanged a resigned glance. They knewthat they were just pawns in the Wart’s maliciousgame.The Wart had settled herself back into an easychair and lit a cigarette. She had brought a bottle ofPatron tequila along to help her enjoy the spectacle.Debs took off her blazer and hung it up.Unenthusiastically she approached the fireplace andbent down and touched her toes. It was one of theleast favored positions for being caned amongst theinmates as it was difficult to maintain whilst underhostile fire. However, Deborah’s exercise regime hadmade her exceptionally limber and she felt little strainon her calves and thighs.She could hear the click of Patsy’s feet behindher and then felt her chum gently turning back thehem of her navy blue pleated skirt into little folds. Shefelt Patsy tug on the tail of her blouse and turn thatback too. She suddenly felt very exposed.“Kill the bumbags,” chortled the Wart.There was a momentary silence in the room.“I’m not authorized to do that Ma’am,” objectedPatsy.“I am authorizing you, Butcher, just do as youare told,” said the Wart.“But Ma’am, the House Charter does not allowme to deliver a bare bender,” said Patsy.

Hold“The House Charter allows the House Mistressto decide such matters,” snorted the Wart.“But Ma’am, the Unit Charter over-rides that, Iam not authorized,” said Patsy emphatically.“I can assure you Butcher that I am workingwithin the protocols, I shall write up the justification,now get on with it,” snapped Robin Wharton.“And if I refuse?” asked Patsy.“I’ll put in a report to the probationary arm ofthe System,” said the Wart and poured anotherhealthy hit of tequila. “You’ll be resentenced.”“That’s bullshit, I’ll take my chances,” saidPatsy obstinately.“Oh for gawd’s sake Patsy,” muttered Debsfrom her stooped position. “Just kill the bumbags!!!”Patsy contemplated poking the Wart in the eyewith one of her long fingernails, but finally thoughtbetter of it. She finally laid aside the cane andreached forward. She put her thumbs inside theelastic waistband of Deborah’s tautened navy bluegossamer bumbags and slowly rolled them down. Sheturned away, retrieved the cane and after glaring atthe Wart shepaced back alongthe woodenfloorboards, theclick of her heelsthe only sound inthe room. Shechalked a mark onthe floor and began to gather herself.Patsy Butcher tapped the tip of the cane onthe floor and set off running.

9Debs bracedherself, she knewthe pain would beexcruciating. Eventhe thin protectionof the mostthreadbare pair ofbumbags took aminiscule bite out of the sensation of a rattan canewhipping across bare flesh. She gritted her teeth andsqueezed her eyes tightly shut.The cane swiped down.“Holy Smoke!” thought Debs Morton.Debs did her best to catch her breath as thepain ratcheted through her central nervous system.The first stroke had been an absolute scorcher andshe was in no doubt that she was in for a very hotand sweaty few minutes.There was something terribly ominous aboutthe sound of Patsy’s high heels clicking and clackingon the wooden floor as she walked back up the libraryto her staring mark. Deborah stared down at thefloor. Beside her she could hear the Wart cackling.She gritted her teeth determinedly. She would nevergive the odious Dame the satisfaction of seeing justhow terribly the cane was hurting her.Patsy licked her lips and set off at a trot,accelerating as she made her final approach andswooping down. She slashed the cane down acrossDeborah’s unprotected bare flesh with a resoundingthwack.She hated being forced to participate in theWart’s dastardly plan. The problem with deliveringrunning benders was there was no way to pull the

Holdstrokes. All she could do was to make sure everystroke landed in the safe zone across the crown ofDebs buttocks, known amongst the Woody Wags asthe sweet spot.The Wart poured another large shot of tequila.She was having tremendous fun. She had alwaysdisliked Deborah intensely. She had beaten Debs onnumerous occasions but Deborah had never treatedher with anything but the utmost contempt. Thesound of the cane rebounding off Deborah’s nakedflesh was music to her ears.

2The Wart Under FireCathryn Cassidy hurried into Lady VictoriaBrompton’s study.“There’s something going down in the library,”she told the Red-shirt urgently. “I just got word thatthe Wart has drafted Patsy in to beat Debs on RedHouse business. There’s something fishy going on.”Victoria Brompton grabbed her smart-phoneand speed-dialed.“I’m sorry to bother you Grand Master, but Ithink we may have a situation up in the library,” shesaid.~~~ooo~~~Debs was not having a good time of it. Overthe past decade and a half Deborah’s rear end hadbecome a highly calibrated whopometer. She was inno doubt whatsoever that she was experiencing someworld class whops. The first five strokes had beensensational. Somehow she had managed to keep herfingers glued to the tips of her pointed shoes so that

Holdthe Wart couldn’t call foul strokes for jerking. It hadtaken all her willpower to put it up and keep it up.She knew the worst was still to come.Patsy sliced the cane down diagonally. It was aperfect strike. A red line immediately etched acrossDeborah’s naked nates, intersecting with the first fivestrokes to create a five-bar gate.Debs whole body convulsed, her head shookfrom side to side in anguish, but somehow shemanaged to stay down. She panted in consternationbut at least it was over.Debs reached down to retrieve her bumbags.“Oh no you don’t, Morton,” hissed the Wart.“We haven’t finished with you yet.” She turned toPatsy. “Give her another six.”Patsy gaped at the Dame. “I’ll do no suchthing,” she spluttered. She glanced over at Debs.Deborah’s face was flushed and her mouth set in athin line. Her eyes were wide open as Ms Wharton’swords penetrated through the blur of pain she wasexperiencing.“Miss Cobb failed to beat Morton for her lastact of dereliction of duty, I shall be dealing with herlater,” said the Wart. “In the meantime bend Mortonover and give her six more. That is an order.”Patsy continuedto gape. Debs facehad contorted into aghastly grimace.“This isridiculous Ma’am,” saidPatsy. “You’ve gonetoo far already. I won’tdo this.”

13“You may be on probation Butcher but I canstill have you flogged for insubordination,” snappedthe Wart, “and as for Morton, if you do not beat herimmediately I shall convene a special session of theHouse Council and charge her with Serial Malfeasanceand Bringing the House into Disrepute. I feel surethat I shall carry the vote.”Deborah’s mind was racing. It was all tooterrible.“Let’s get this over with,” Debs said finally andturned around and bent over in front of the fireplace.Patsy Butcher turned and walked back downthe library with a heavy tread. She was just about toset off at a run when the door swung open.Mr Humphries walked in with his hands in hispockets. “Stand down, Butcher,” he said as he walkedinto the room. “Deborah, you can get up now.” Heapproached the Wart who looked shocked.“What’s going on here?” he asked the Dame.~~~ooo~~~The Wart wrang her hands and gnashed herteeth while she waited outside the Grand Master’sstudy. Inside the office Patsy and Deborah weregiving their account of events that had occurred inthe library. Ms Wharton had no doubt that they werepainting a bleak picture. She heard her name beingcalled and went into the study.“But she deserved to be thrashed,” wailed theWart. “I am Mistress of the House and I have fullauthority to discipline members on a discretionarybasis.”

HoldSo far the interview had not gone well for theWart. Mr Humphries did not appear in the least bitsympathetic towards her explanations of why she hadfelt it necessary to have Deborah subjected to arunning bare bender. In fact he had been ratherdismissive of her arguments. It was all mostdisconcerting.Mr Humphries leaned back in his seat. He hadbeen the Grand Master at the Woody Back to SchoolUnit for eight weeks now and was justifiably proud ofthe progress he had made. The previous year hispredecessor Ms Lawton had instituted an austereregime code-named Operation Scorched Arse in anattempt to curb the rise of the subversive Cult ofMega-Minxdom. She admitted that the campaign hadnot been a success and had been open to abuse fromthe cruel Dames from the Radical Right and theSecret Sorority of Serial Spankers.Upon his arrival Mr Humphries had outlawedthe practices of hostile targeting and insisted that theDames submit written justification for theirdisciplinary activities.Over the past weeks he had becomeincreasingly impressed with the performance of LadyVictoria Brompton as Red-shirt at the facility. Despiteher reputation as a pugnacious potty-mouth she wasproving to be even-handed and level-headed. Sheruled over her Elite corps with an iron fist and the

15back of her lethal wood-backed hairbrush. She hadprohibited her Elite from indulging the heinouspractices of collaring, sweating and sporting spanking,and the Secret Sorority of Serial Spankers was now aspent force.Nonetheless, the Grand Master was aware thathe still had much work to do. Patty Hodge, theDeputy Grand Dame and Commandant of the RadicalRight, considered that his Woody Glasnost, as shetermed it, was an error of judgment and covertlyinstructed her cronies to continue to lay siege to thebumbags of the inmates. Miss Robin Wharton wasone her key aides and top operatives.Like his predecessor the Grand Master faced adilemma. Ten years earlier when the government hadfirst introduced the experimental Back to School Unit’sand the social rehabilitation programs they hadscoured the nation for the top disciplinarians. Foralmost two decades Robin Wharton had appearedamongst the highest echelons of the Ministry ofEducations list of leading martinets, which coupledwith her reputation as a fine educator had made her aprime candidate for recruitment.The Grand Master had studied Ms Wharton’srecords during her time at Woodys. Her whop-ratewas prolific; every year she caned significantly moreinmates than any other member of the Brass. He alsoobserved that she rarely issued the warning yellowcards suggested in the ‘Guidelines for Thrashing’.Curiously nearly every offence the inmates werecharged with in her lecture room were of the naturethat attracted a ‘mandatory caning’. He also observedthat the number of gals beaten on Red HouseBusiness far out-weighed the beatings carried out by

Holdthe Blue House. The majority of Red House beatingswere carried out on the specific instructions of MsRobin Wharton in her position of Mistress of theHouse.The Grand Master had no doubt that MsWharton’s used her harsh interpretations of the rules,regulations and protocols to satisfy her need tomaintain the fix’s she required as a certified WhopJunkie.Nonetheless, in the current prevailing liberalattitudes towards corporal punishment finding areplacement martinet of the Warts caliber andexperience would be a challenging task. As MsWharton had pointed out, “she is a necessary evil.”He was also aware that the bumbags of DebsMorton were particularly at risk. Although he hadformally rescinded her status as Public EnemyNumber One and warned the Brass that she was nolonger to be targeted with extreme prejudice she stillspent a considerable amount of time bending forwardat the waist. Despite her legions of admirers Deborahalso had an unfortunate habit of attracting enemies,not the least of whom was Ms Wharton. During theyear of Operation Scorched Arse the Wart had takenadvantage of Deborah’s unfortunate status as MsLawton’s bête noir and had caned her more than anyother inmate at the facility. He had no doubt that theevents in the library were the result of Ms Wharton’smalicious obsession with creating havoc insideDeborah’s bumbags.He was barely listening to the Wart’sincreasingly indignant justifications for her actions, itwas grating on his nerves.

17“Ms Wharton, that is enough,” he said finally.“As far as I am concerned you have stepped welloutsidethe boundaries of your authority. I am goingto offer you several choices. I shall leave it for you todecide how we will proceed.”~~~ooo~~~Deborah and Patsy had to revive the Wart withsmelling salts after she had fainted. They helped herinto an easy chair.“Take your time, Ms Wharton,” counseled theGrand Master. “I would not like you to make any rashdecisions.”The Wart promptly burst into floods of tears.~~~ooo~~~“Katie,” the Grand Master instructed, “pleasefind Ms Wharton a set of clobber. Once she is suitablyattired take her down to the Great Hall and set up thevaulting horse. At six o’clock assemble the unit; weare going to have ourselves a Public Flogging.”Katie Beck gaped at the Grand Master. Sheknew from personal experience that Mr Humphrieswas willing to go tounusual lengths todemonstrate his pointof view. On twooccasions the GrandMaster had consideredKatie’s interpretationsof the protocols knownas the ‘Politics of

HoldClobber’ to be overly conservative. He hademphasized his opinion with Katie head down, arseup over his knee.Patty and the Wart had teased her mercilesslyin the saloon bar of the Bunch of Grapes.“He can do that to you because you’re onlysemi-Brass, he’d never dare to do that to real Brass,”the Wart had told Katie imperiously. It had givenKatie a severe dose of the pip.“I’ll be happy too,” Katie Beck said gleefully.“Come with me, Warty one.”“Have you ever used a cane?” The GrandMaster asked Deborah after Katie and the Wart hadleft the study.Debs shook her head.“Well this is the time for you to learn,” said MrHumphries. “Patsy, take Deborah down to thepractice range and get her fully certified. We’llreconvene back here in an hour.”

3A Total MuffDeborah’s best chums Rosemary, Jojo and Nixwere concerned for the well-being of their friend’sbumbags. She had not been seen since she had beensummoned to the library and she was noticeable byher absence when they assembled in the Great Hall.Unusually when Katie Beck had issued theinstructions over the intercom for the inmates torepair to the hall to witness a public flogging she hadnot announced the name of the unfortunate recipient.The ominous vaulting horse on the stage andDeborah’s absence gave her chums good reason tobelieve that it was poor Debs who was about to beflogged.~~~ooo~~~Rosemary, Jojo and Nix sighed in unison as thedoors to the hall swung open and Mr Humphriesentered followed by Deborah Morton. Their sighschanged to gasps as seconds later Robin Whartonshuffled into the hall.

HoldThe Dame was dressed in ill-fitting clobber.Katie had found a gymslip that was indecently shortand barely covered the Warts navy blue bumbags. Ashield with the letter ‘W’ had been sewn onto the bib.Robin Wharton was a creature of significant girth andshe looked as if she had been shoe-horned into thegarments. She followed the Grand Master andDeborah up onto the stage with her head lowered.She looked pitiful and bereft of dignity.The Grand Master gave a brief but pointedspeech assuring the inmates that abuse of privilegeby the Brass would not be tolerated. He promised toreview the appeals process, which he acknowledgedthe inmates rarely resorted to as under the currentprotocols a failed appeal resulted in the inmatesreceiving double the amount of strokes.Throughout the speech the Wart stood withher head hung low and her shoulders pumping as shesobbed and blubbered in her despair.The Grand Master looked over at Deborah.“Are you ready?”“Yes, Sir,” she responded with as muchconfidence as she could muster.Patsy stepped forward and helped Deborah outof her blazer. Debs rolled up her cuffs and loosenedher tie before accepting the thirty-six inch long rattancane.“Ms Wharton, please remove your blazer andbend over the horse,” instructed the Grand Master.Katie Beck stepped forward and retrieved theWart’s red and black striped blazer. She made noeffort to disguise her glee at Ms Wharton’smisfortune.

21The Wart took some persuading before shebent over. She pleaded and begged, sobbed andwailed that it was all a terrible misunderstanding. Itwas only when Mr Humphries threatened to have herphysically bound down over the equipment that shefinally complied.~~~ooo~~~Robin Wharton felt the hem of her navy bluegymslip being slowly turned back. Huge wet tearswere dripping on the floor of the stage. She felt giddyand befuddled; she still had difficulty grasping howshe had come to be in this ignominious position.The Grand Master had offered the Dame twooptions, she could pack her trunks and leave thefacility for good, or she could accept a suitablepunishment to amend for her sins.The punishment on offer was to allow herselfto be subjected to a public flogging. In addition shewould spend the subsequent four weeks required todress in full clobber and would be assigned to work asa grubby on the Elite landing. Members of the Elitewould be granted full spanking rights while the Damewas on duty.Unpalatable as the latter option was to theWart, the first option was even worse. In the worldoutside the bricked walls of the Woody compound useof the cane had become unfashionable. If she choseto resign she was sentencing herself to a life as aWhop Junkie with little or no chance of ever scoring afix. It was just too terrible to consider.~~~ooo~~~

HoldDeborahMorton flexed thecane between herhands and tookseveral deepbreaths to calmherself. She hadspent forty-fiveminutes on thepractice rangetaking instructionfrom Patsy in the fine art of caning and gettingcertified. After overcoming her initial nerves she hadshown herself to be a natural with a cane. Even bythe normal high standards of a professional tennisplayer her eye-ball coordination had been consideredastonishing and her racquet control exceptional. Yearsof hitting hundreds of thousands of tennis balls hadmade her wrists remarkably strong. She quicklylearned that she did not need to use much of a backswing,the secret to controlling the shaft and tip ofthe cane was to finish the stroke with a flick of thewrist, accelerating the whippy stick to Mach One.Nonetheless, raising the dust from thebumbags of a mannequin was one thing but theprospect delivering her first thrashing in real-life wasaltogether more daunting.Debs set her feet and concentrated. Shetapped the cane down once, twice, thrice across thetautened bumbags that appeared to be constructedfrom enough material to make a set of drapes for areasonable sized bay window. She pulled her armback and swung the cane.

23The Warts response was instantaneous. Shescreamed and squealed, her body convulsed, her legsscissored, her head shook and her fists pummeled theair.The inmates in the hall exchanged glances.There were very few of them who had not beensubjected to a beating from the Wart. She was themost despised member of the Brass; the sight of hergetting her comeuppance was a treat that they hadnever expected to experience. However, her responsehad astonished them. The inmates of the Woody Backto School Unit lived by the credo that ‘only muffshowl’. Over the years they had witnessed dozenspublic floggings; the recipients gracing the stage withpride and stoicism. Never had they seen a reaction ofthe theatrical scale of Ms Wharton’s.Deborah felt her nerves dissipate. The firststroke had gone off swimmingly; the cane had landedperfectly within the sweet spot. She settled in. Sheplanned to deliver a long, leisurely caning with thirtysecond intervals between strokes. However, the Wartwas not cooperating. She continued to wriggle andsquirm long after the interval had elapsed.Mr Humphries was not given to irritability buthe was clearly becoming vexed. “Ms Wharton, ceasethose ridiculous noises and stay still,” he told her. “Ifyou do not put it up and keep it up I shall becompelled to have you restrained.”Deborah forced herself to maintain herconcentration and not allow herself to be distractedby the Dame’s pathetic blubbing and sniveling. Debswould not have been blamed if she had succumbed tothe temptation to thrash the bejaysus out of the Wartbut she showed admirable restraint. She delivered

Holdevery stroke with the same measured control andaccuracy.“She’s good,” whispered Nixdown admiringly.Jojo and Rosemary nodded sagely. “This is aworld class whopping,” agreed Jojo.“What a fucking muff,” Rosemary opined aboutthe Wart.The flogging was proving to be a laboriousprocess. Despite Mr Humphries chiding the Wartcontinued to blub and howl, and her bumbagsconstantly wriggled like an unset jelly. She tookconsiderable coercion between each stroke to settledown so that Deborah had a steady target to aim at.The Grand Master considered dispatching Katie tocollect some striped ties from her inventory and tyingthe Wart into position but figured it would justprolong the performance.Debs took a deep breath. She was determinedto close the flogging with the same consummate skillwith which she had delivered the first eleven strokes.She adjusted her stance slightly and slashed the canedown diagonally.The Warts response was deafening. Herscreams were in danger of shattering the windows.“Holy smoking bumbags, that was one helluvawhop,” giggled Nixdown.“Looked like it was designed to cut the Wart intwo,” agreed Jojo.“Well now we know that The Wart might beable to dish it out but she certainly can’t take it,”observed Rosemary.“What a fucking muff,” chorused the threechums cheerily.

25Robin Wharton stood on the stage sobbing andmoaning. She looked disheveled and forlorn.“Katie take this fool upstairs and clean her up,she looks like she’s been dragged through a hedgebackwards, I’ll see her in my study in thirty minutes,”said the Grand Master. “We need to discuss hergrubby schedule.”The inmates stomped their feet and whoopedand cheered as Robin Wharton was dejectedlyescorted from the stage.~~~ooo~~~“I’m really sorry about earlier, sis,” said Patsyashamedly. “I should have stood up to her.”“And risked being sent back inside?” repliedDebs. “She stitched both of us up like kippers; therewas nothing either of us could do.” She reached overand hugged Patsy. “Don’t worry; you can’t break mewith a cane, but sis I have to say you are still hotstuff.”Patsy returned Deborah’s hug. “Talk about thepot calling the kettle black, next year when you’re amember of the Elite gawd help the gal’s bumbags.That was a sensational swishing!”~~~ooo~~~“He had no right to treat me like that,” wailedthe Wart in the saloon bar of the Bunch of Grapes.Understandably she had elected not to perch herfrazzled rear end on a bar-stool and was propping upthe bar slamming back tequilas at Olympic rate. “Ihave a good mind to report him to the Ministry.”

Hold“Yeah rock on Warty-one,” grinned PattyHodge. “The only reason you agreed to be flogged isbecause you’re a Whop Junkie and this is the onlyplace you’re guaranteed a fix. Hey, it was onlywhops.”“So much for your theory that he wouldn’t daredo that to real Brass,” gloated Katie.“Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!!!!” growled the Wart andslammed down a healthy shot of tequila that shecharged to Katie Beck’s tab.