Bar/Bat Mitzvah Guide - Temple Ner Tamid

Bar/Bat Mitzvah Guidebook (v1.0) Page 3 of 16REQUIREMENTS FOR BECOMING BAR/BAT MITZVAHBecoming a Bar/Bat Mitzvah in the synagogue on a regular Shabbat or holiday morning is aprivilege to be earned. The basic requirement of this synagogue – and of all Conservativecongregations – is that the candidate must have a minimum of five years of training (5-6 hours perweek) in our Religious School (or its equivalent (i.e., Hillel) to be determined by the Rabbi and theEducational Director). Candidates are required to be attending our Religious School orConfirmation program (or a Jewish day school or a Jewish community high school) at the time ofthe Bar/Bat Mitzvah ceremony. The students are expected to remain in religious school for theentire year, even if the Bar/Bat Mitzvah service takes place sometime during the school year.Parents and children will be required to sign a contract indicating that they will abide by this rule.Starting a minimum of seven months before the Bar/Bat Mitzvah date, candidates areexpected to attend Shabbat morning services at least twice a month.For one month immediately prior to becoming Bar/Bat Mitzvah, candidates are expectedto attend services every week. The reason for these requirements is because there is nobetter way to become acquainted with the Shabbat service. The more services your childattends, the more his/her anxiety level will drop. Parents will also benefit from thisexposure to our services.The candidate’s preparation time with the Cantor is usually about six months. Thecandidate receives a special folder of materials from which to practice. The Cantor will set aweekly review session and work diligently with your child, but you must make sure thatyour child practices between lessons. (As an old joke puts it: “Excuse me,” asks a visitor toManhattan. “How can I get to Carnegie Hall?” “Practice, practice, practice!”) There is anadditional benefit that comes from supervising your child’s practice: you will show howmuch you care. It will add special meaning to the event.A seminar with the Rabbi and the Education Director brings together candidates andparents to discuss "Bar/Bat Mitzvah basics." The seminar meets for about five sessionsduring the school year, for about 90 minutes each session. Your participation is stronglyencouraged! The seminar will help you design a service and a celebration appropriate toyour family.Candidates are invited to prepare creative Bar/Bat Mitzvah projects to display atShabbat services on the day of their synagogue début (for example, a student might build ascale model of the ancient tabernacle). The Rabbi and Cantor are happy to supervise theseprojects.Beside creative projects, candidates may choose to do community service or tzedakah(charity) projects which will be acknowledged on the day of becoming Bar/Bat Mitzvah.Doing "extra credit" work of this sort shows that the children truly understand the meaningof becoming Bar/Bat Mitzvah.If a child was born to a non-Jewish mother, he/she must be converted to Judaism (normallya simple procedure) before becoming Bar/Bat Mitzvah. Please consult with the Rabbi.You can help your child if you accept cheerfully the additional work needed to become Bar/BatMitzvah. If you show any resentment or impatience, your child's attitude will inevitably reflect yourfeelings, and may last long after the event itself. Please remember that becoming Bar/Bat Mitzvah isonly the beginning of responsible Jewish life, not an end in itself.Temple Ner Tamid ● 368 Lowell Street ● Peabody, MA 01960 ● 978-532-1293templenertamid@verizon.net ● www.templenertamid.com