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Damini Mai reacts<br />

to Virgin Tree Feud<br />

Sidebar Clickversity<br />

by Shaktiman<br />

There are a couple of things in<br />

North campus which the students<br />

are proud of, one of these is the<br />

Virgin Tree in Hindu college. With<br />

thousands of young students as<br />

devotees of the respected<br />

Damdami Mai who is worshiped<br />

on Valentine’s Day, the tree is one<br />

of the sensations in the entire DU.<br />

It hasn’t been long since there<br />

was this order by the principal to<br />

chop down the tree – the only<br />

hope to nerds and shy soldiers to<br />

l o s e v i r g i n i t y. A s p e r t h e<br />

statements, “The tree has been<br />

chopped as it posed difficulties in<br />

expanding infrastructure.” .The<br />

tree has already been chopped off<br />

and the construction process has<br />

been initiated. The students are still<br />

praying for some miracle by<br />

Damdami Mai.<br />

However, it didn’t take much long<br />

for Damdami Mai to hear students’<br />

cries against the diktats of the<br />

college administration. As per<br />

brutally unreliable sources, the<br />

p r i n c i p a l h a d b e e n g e t t i n g<br />

nightmares in which Damdami Mai<br />

appears from time to time. She has<br />

threatened the principal to get<br />

everything back to normal as<br />

Damdami Mai doesn’t want a<br />

falling number of her followers. If<br />

her demands are not met, she has<br />

threatened that all the students<br />

would not be able to write exams as<br />

they will be using their right HAND<br />

for self pleasure a little more than<br />

too much.” The principal has<br />

decided to have a meeting with<br />

Damdami Maiin the dream next<br />

week and has decided to negotiate<br />

with the said demands. Though the<br />

PA of the principal did show some<br />

positive response regarding this<br />

matter and said that there had<br />

been turmoil in the senior staff and<br />

seeing the popularity of Damdami<br />

Mai among students, it has been<br />

decided that this issue will be<br />

further taken into United Nations<br />

to have an international solution to<br />

national virginity. Damdami Maihas<br />

recently opened a Facebook<br />

account to maintain her followers<br />

(just in case) where she has also<br />

asked her followers to put up a<br />

statue of virgin Sunny Leone in case<br />

the Virgin Tree is not restored and<br />

she has also apologised for not<br />

connecting with her followers due<br />

to poor networks in Devlok(Where<br />

all these gods and goddesses live).<br />

Damdami Mai has also begun a<br />

YouTube channel to give online<br />

tuition for self-pleasure and tips<br />

and tricks for newbies. All this has<br />

interrupted the semester exams<br />

preparation of students so let me<br />

study now and thank you very much.<br />

WWF Earth Hour<br />

2016- LIGHTS OFF<br />

By Prabhjot Kaur<br />

“We are the first generation to feel the impact of<br />

the climate change, and the last generation that<br />

can do something about it” – Barack Obama<br />

Until two decades back, the world looked at<br />

economic status alone as a measure of human<br />

development. This idea led to rapid exploitation<br />

of resources across the world. This lopsided<br />

growth led to catastrophic results increase in the<br />

carbon dioxide levels, rise in sea level and global<br />

warming.<br />

To combat this situation, WWF (World Wide<br />

Fund for nature) came up with the idea of<br />

Earth Hour-switching off lights in your home/<br />

office for one hour to take a stand against the<br />

climate change. It was famously started as a<br />

‘lights off’ event in Sydney, Australia in 2007<br />

and since then it has grown to engage more than<br />

172 countries and territories worldwide. It was<br />

started in India in 2009 and has seen widespread<br />

support from all the states. This year Earth Hour<br />

celebrates its 10th anniversary worldwide. The<br />

logo 60+ means going beyond those sixty minutes<br />

and working towards protecting our environment<br />

throughout the year. This year Earth<br />

Hour focuses on going beyond the hour; this<br />

year Earth Hour in India focuses on promoting<br />

rooftop solar panels and open discussions about<br />

climate change.<br />

Earth hour 2016 is on 19th March; 8.30 pm.<br />

Pledge your support and switch off the lights for<br />

an hour. It’s now or never!

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