The Parishioner - Edition 26|Spring 2016

JOHN DERMOT NELSON McELROY
This In Memoriam is based on the eulogy given by his son, John, at the funeral Mass, 2nd December 2015
The many people who knew John at St Francis or
Nettlestead churches or as members of Maidstone
Circle of Catenians were much saddened to hear of
his death. John was born in Dublin in 1933 the eldest son
of a family of four children. His father was a business man
and his mother a lawyer. He grew up in a large and close
knit family with three siblings and 21 first cousins. His
schooling was blighted by recurrent asthma requiring
protracted periods of convalescence. Then, when 16, he
fell seriously ill with meningitis. At the time, this was a
deadly disease but John was fortunate to be an early
recipient of penicillin. In fact, during his illness Alexander
Fleming, the discoverer of penicillin, was lecturing in
Dublin and, through the intervention of his very
determined mother, came to visit John in the clinic giving
invaluable advice to the physicians treating him.
Having taken so much time out of school for ill health, John decided to go
straight into business. He was a gifted craftsman and began to make wood
furniture which he successfully sold to department stores like Clery’s in
Dublin. One of his signature pieces, a clothes horse appropriately called the
Mac Rack, can still be found in discerning Dublin homes!
In 1957 John decided to search for pastures new and moved, with some friends,
to London. It was here that John met Jo when he and his friends were at a party
organised by their landlady. John and Jo married in 1960, a year after John
had taken up a job as a furniture designer for the Kent County Council Supplies
Department, at the time a major procurer of goods and services for schools,
the police force and other government departments. John remained with KCC
throughout his career, eventually becoming deputy head of the Supplies
Department. He was really an entrepreneur at heart. So, when the opportunity
presented itself, he took early retirement and began a consulting firm, going
back to what he enjoyed most, running his own business.
centre in Maidstone.
John loved to travel and took great pleasure in visiting
family in Ireland and in Washington DC where his
parents and siblings had moved. For many years he had
a caravan and took Jo and their two sons John and
Aidan exploring France, Germany and Italy. John also
loved to walk, and he and Jo enjoyed many hiking
holidays with friends in France, Switzerland and in the
Lake District. Indeed, until a year ago he and Jo
walked once a week with their close circle of friends.
John took an active role in the life of St Francis Church
in Maidstone. He was chair of the finance committee
for some years and became a Eucharistic minister. He
wasn’t just a pillar of the Catholic Church but also
took time to assist other communities, for example,
helping to raise funds to build the new Salvation Army
John was a committed member of the Catenian Association to which he
belonged for over 45 years. He was president of Maidstone Circle twice and
truly believed in the Association’s values. As President, in 2008 he held a
memorable dinner at Leeds Castle to celebrate the Circle’s 500th meeting.
Catenians have been an important part of John’s life giving wonderful
friendship and support over the years and, in particular, over the past few
months when he was most ill. He much valued the visits and messages, and
took comfort from the knowledge that the brothers would continue to be there
for Jo too.
John’s faith was strong and he was able to bear his final illness with fortitude
and stoicism. When the end came, it came peacefully. John touched many
peoples’ lives and was widely known and respected as a gentleman, and, indeed
a gentle man. We know that his memory as a gentle and generous man will
live on with all of us.
Grandchildren
Mary Brittain 2nd June 2014
At first, small bundle to cuddle and feed
Change nappy, soothe, bath is all they need
Before long they sit, crawl, try to stand
Now smiling toddlers, isn’t life grand?
Sarah and Gemma were first to arrive
Time goes so fast, now almost five
Christopher and Strachan, now on their feet
And new baby Amy, all keen to meet
Another year and two more babies to come
Rachel, followed by Gareth, oh such fun!
Two more years, two more babies so fine
Emily and Jevan bring Grandchildren to nine
Look forward to when they come and stay
The cousins meet, chat, fight and play
Outings in the car, are no good at all
Now hire a mini-bus, we all have a ball
Over the years the Grandchildren have grown
Don’t come and stay, the nest they have flown
But to keep numbers up, three more arrive
Now Lewis nine, Sophie eight, little James five
Usually the youngest seven of the dozen
Still stay with us, sleeping cousin to cousin
Playing, swimming or just having tea
Take photos, make albums for them and for me
Oldest five between twenty-five and twenty
Are happy, healthy, doing well, fun a-plenty
A Great-Grandmother, I want to be
Not on the cards yet, I can see
Other Grandchildren, please think of my plight
But have your babies when it feels right
Hope to have my get up and go
Trust it’s not gone, but who’s to know?
I will be ready and waiting for sure
With stories of you, your parents and more
albums to show, memories to make
Grandad and I, just have to wait!
(P.S. Am still waiting!)
The seven youngest Grandchildren.
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