Locale Hub 4074 - Issue 2

set clear boundaries and expectations early, they
will know exactly where they stand with you and
in their environment. You will help them make
sense of the world around them, form good habits
and ideally make good choices when faced with
everyday problems. When you set the boundaries and
expectations, be consistent. Follow through on what
you say and let your child feel safe and secure in their
environment with you.
4 Be the role model
As a parent, you are your child’s first role model. If
you have watched your children closely for a few
hours or listened to them speak, you will hear and see
snippets of your most common sayings or mannerism
come out in their play time or voice as they mimic
you. Provide your child with an environment and role
model that is upbeat and gives your child hope and
a positive attitude to move through their day. Young
children react to whatever mood or state of mind you
are in. If you are always stressed and in a hurry, they
will pick up the vibe and develop a similar habit. Take
time to stop and be with your kids. Have fun with
them at the park or at the beach. Take them on nature
walks. Think of who you needed around you when
you were a child and be that person.
5 Meet children in the moment
Children live in the moment so meet them there.
Don’t overload them with your own stresses and
worries we carry with us as adults, both past and
present. A child’s biggest concern in their day are
generally meeting their own basic needs – food,
water, sleep, safety and love. Meet your kids there.
6 Don’t over catastrophize the situation
The part of the child’s brain that deals with emotions
and rational decision making is underdeveloped.
The prefrontal cortex doesn’t fully develop until
the age of 22. However, as adults we already have
a fully functioning rational brain. We need to use
our skills to calm a situation down and don’t over
catastrophize it. Because of an underdeveloped brain
as a child, their response is irrational and so through
words, actions and role modelling we can use our
rational brain to invoke calm and coping strategies
for certain situations that doesn’t result in a full blown
catastrophe.
7 Let children experience disappointment
Our natural propensity as a parent is the ‘fix’. However,
if we continue to fix every disappointment our
child faces, they are not going to develop their own
strategies to cope with the ups and downs of life and
the disappointment that results from that. So ‘be’ with
your child when they experience disappointment and
tell them how much is sux that they didn’t get into
the cricket team or the choir. Problem solve ways to
help them get over it.
8 Recognise emotions and strategies to deal
with them
By helping a child recognise their own emotions and
develop strategies to deal with them, we are allowing
them to again navigate the ups and downs of life. The
big emotions that press parent’s buttons are anger,
frustration and sadness that generally result in an
emotional outburst in some form from our child. Let
your child experience these emotions, name them
and put strategies in place to deal with them. Assure
your child it is OK if they feel these emotions as long
as they know how to move on from them.
9 Shape a positive inner critic
For good mental health, we need to help our children
develop a positive inner critic. They need to be selfconfident
and self-assured to back themselves in
difficult situations and to make good choices. By
teaching our children to love themselves and be kind
to themselves, we are setting them up for being able
to deal with setbacks, making mistakes and failure. To
encourage self-confidence, our children need to feel
a sense of significance. Let them perform that dance
concert with bad dance moves and terrible music. Let
them experience new things and take risks. Let them
say no and assert themselves and learn from that
experience. And use positive self-talk yourself – don’t
criticize yourself in front of your children.
10 Discipline with respect and love
Every children will need discipline at some point and
some more than others. When you are disciplining
your child, remember it is the behaviour you are
correcting – not the child. Don’t shame them or
criticize them as a person. Speak to your child like you
would talk to your best friend or your work colleague
– with respect. Give lots of cuddles and use discipline
as a teachable moment to learn from rather than a
time to berate or shame.
Anna Partridge is a Parent Education, School
Teacher and Mother to 3 kids. She is passionate
about working with families to help them raise
confident and resilient children.
http://www.annapartridge.com
About Anna:
Anna Partridge is
a certified Positive
Discipline Parent
Educator, a school
teacher and a mother to three highly
spirited, beautiful children. She loves
nothing more than helping parents raise
resilient and confident children, build strong
and connected family relationships and
strive for calm, fun and happy families.
http: /annapartridge.com/