ePaper_2nd Edition_October 12, 2016

Feature
17
WEDNESDAY, OCTOBER 12, 2016
DT
Gender be gone
Breaking down stereotypes of masculinity
• Tasaffy Hossain
Gender equality – as soon as we
usually hear those words, two
major concepts come to our mind
– women and feminism. And then
the questions usually go into how
something can be about equality,
when we haven’t talked about the
other side of the coin – men!
Men – that epitome of
MANkind, the torch bearer and the
leader. Everywhere we look, we
are bombarded with the different
roles and forms that men take in
our societies. Historical figures,
newspapers, sports channels,
movies and comics – there is an
endless number of male characters
that help to define what it means
to be a man. Or is that what we
would like to think?
If we actually try to break down
these people, whether fictional
or real, I think what truly stands
out is that fact that most of these
men are usually revered for some
of the same basic things – looks,
strength, brilliance, and mostly
for being winners. Whether in
sports, business or politics, men
are respected and celebrated solely
based on their prowess at being a
leader.
Starting from the kindergarten
playground, through advanced
levels of education systems into the
workplace – the one clear message
about what it means to be a man,
is simply that they are successful.
Don’t get me wrong, I am not
saying this makes life easier for
women, but maybe we have missed
out on noticing what this constant
pressure on men in needing to be
the best has done.
Coming back to gender roles,
the black and white designation
of manliness or masculinity has
remained unchallenged for a
long time. Men are still seen as
the household head, the bread
earner, the stable problem solver.
Feminism and gender rights
projects have been pushing
to break down the barriers of
femininity and womanhood,
encouraging girls and women to be
just as independent, competitive,
and worldly as their male
counterparts, while also being able
to love their feminine sides. The
same encouragement has not been
provided to men, who are still only
being acknowledged and noticed
for those same masculine traits and
“manly” roles as before.
We celebrate the woman
who can do it all, we celebrate
mothers for their
ability to give
everything up and
we even celebrate
women who have
the courage to
maneuver societal
pressures by being
happily single. Do
note that by “we”,
I mean the liberal,
feminist circles
and mindsets that
have been evolving
even within the
social constraints of
Dhaka.
But we have not
The black and white designation of manliness
or masculinity has remained unchallenged for
a long time
yet embraced the
notion of stay-athome
fathers, or
husbands being
less successful than
their wives, or even male nurses
or caregivers. And that is where
we have failed to push for gender
equality from the other side.
Equality is when we are not
holding anyone back or judging
them for making a choice that suits
them on an individual basis, but
does not fit into our preconceived
notions of gender roles. That
can only be possible once we
acknowledge that our socially
constructed gender norms are not
benefiting either males or females,
and agree to create the space for
anyone to become who they want
to be.
Keeping this is mind, the
upcoming production “Men
don’t TALK” will delve into the
issues that boys and men face
while growing up in a society
like Dhaka’s, where there is a
strong pressure to uphold gender
norms and fit into the roles set
up by society. The shows will be
held on 4th and 5th November
in Khamarbari and Gulshan-1
respectively. Further information
can be found on the facebook page:
Men don’t TALK 2016. •
Tasaffy Hossain is the
founder of Bonhishikhaunlearn
gender. Bonhishikha
believes that who you look
like, how you are treated and
what role you play should
not be determined by the sex
organ that you are born with