THE Challenge! Spring 2011

A Father’s Story
A Father Explains his Son’s Challenges Following a TBI
By Tom Constand, Owner, Starrconstand Business Communication
Thomas is my son. He’ll be 17 on May 25th. He sustained his TBI in a
boating accident. He and two other friends were riding jet skis on Crooked
Lake in northern Michigan last summer when they collided. My son’s
head and shoulder were hit by the hull of the other jet ski as it went airborne and
passed over his watercraft, shearing off the steering column in the process. Pulled
semi-comatose out of water and driven to shore by his friends on the other, stillfunctioning
jet ski. Three days in induced coma. Swelling was outside skull, not
inside. There was evidence of shearing in the brain. Thomas had six weeks of
physical, cognitive and speech therapy after the accident. This still affects his
abilities in fast-moving sports, such as lacrosse. Other than that, though, things
are remarkably well. 3.8 GPA in school. (Same level as pre-injury).
Below is the letter I distributed to Thomas’ JV football family last year. My wife,
Deb, and I sent a similar letter to Thomas’ teachers before fall classes.
Hey, gang.
“I feel different. I don’t feel alive.”
First of all - you’ve all been incredible with your support over these past two weeks. You have no idea how your emails,
calls, visits, and Facebook postings have been so instrumental in getting us through. Thank goodness for the Crackberry!
Most of you know by now that Thomas was discharged last night. The shoulder MRI was the last thing holding us up, and
the result was that no surgery is required. So we loaded up the truck, and headed to Chipotle (Food, that is. Burritos,
Fajitas...Iced Tea). He was so happy to get out of the hospital and into his own bed – as were we!
While we’re thankful for his prognosis and thrilled to begin the recovery phase, it’s that phase that I’m reaching out to
you for a little assistance on.
On behalf of Thomas, his sister Stephanie, and Deb - I thank you all for your prayers, your kindness, and your love.
Thomas sustained a traumatic brain injury (TBI). He looks fine: his appearance is absolutely normal, his speech is fine,
and his memory is completely intact. There are no visible signs - except for minor discoloration from his black eye that’s
nearly gone – of his injury. His shoulder will hurt for a while from a couple of broken bones and slight ligament tear,
however no surgery is required and it will heal soon enough on its own.
But since he’s regained consciousness – as he tells us and his friends “I feel different. I don’t feel alive.” This is
completely consistent with a TBI. It’s why there will be months of therapy ahead of us. The brain takes its own time
for the neurons to begin reconnecting pathways. During that time, he will feel as if he’s in a fog. He will tire easily, and
when he does – he will “check out” of conversations and stare into space. He’ll become emotional, he might anger
easily, he’s impulsive. Exactly what and when these symptoms might manifest themselves is somewhat unpredictable,
but the point is that people need to be aware that despite his normal appearance, he’s not “all better.” Not yet. It’s not
like a broken leg or arm that you can cast and six weeks later, it’s fine. He will definitely not be playing football this year,
and while we’re targeting lacrosse in the spring as the time when he might return to competitive physical sports, even
that is not a sure thing.
I guess I’m asking for three things: 1. That people understand he’s not completely “back” yet, and won’t be for a while.
2. That when he does exhibit signs/feelings that might seem strange, know that this comes with a TBI and be
understanding. 3. He needs the patience and support of friends and family (you’re all family!) more than ever during these
months of therapy. While his “not feeling alive” might be consistent with a TBI, it’s nonetheless heart wrenching for him and
for us. The only things that will get him out of the bubble he feels trapped in are love, support, understanding...and time.
Tom
THE Challenge! | Spring 2011
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